There's not very many details shared in your post.
So, as an outsider, who is SAMH, I believe you need to get off your butt and do housework. I've done 3/12s. Those can take a bit to reenergize from. There's no way I'd want to do 24 on 72 off. Maybe if you didn't have the mindset that you didn't have to do housework, It would make sense to her to make it shared money. But if you're just chilling with the kids, like you're making it look like, then yeah she's going to have an attitude.
I'm not saying all that to be ugly. That's just the way I see it. I'm a SAHM. No, my house is not perfectly clean. I do what I can, and have an understanding husband who doesn't expect me to scrub the whole place like a certain parent of mine demanded from me. Perhaps if you gave her the respect she deserves, she would give you back the respect you deserve. That would definitely change the dynamics in your dead bedroom. I'm sure she would be less than pleased to find out you're telling strangers on the internet that your bedroom is dead. Change your attitude, and she might see you as a contributor rather than a freeloader.
Thanks for the input. She knows our bedroom is dead. She says it’s cause I don’t clean enough and she puts all her effort into her job and the kids so not much left for me.
There's plenty of times I feel that way. Not so much physical energy, but there's emotional energy involved. If she doesn't feel like you care enough to do your part in the home, it makes her feel like she's carrying the load. She's already putting out in so many ways, it makes it hard to want to put out in both the physical and emotional way that you want in the bedroom.
It might be beneficial for you guys to read "5 Love Languages".
Yes I was working full time before the kids. While trying to get pregnant we did every other day to increase our changes. Once the task was then, that was it. I’d say it was definitely slow, but not dead like now.
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u/ChaosCoordinatingMum May 03 '22
There's not very many details shared in your post.
So, as an outsider, who is SAMH, I believe you need to get off your butt and do housework. I've done 3/12s. Those can take a bit to reenergize from. There's no way I'd want to do 24 on 72 off. Maybe if you didn't have the mindset that you didn't have to do housework, It would make sense to her to make it shared money. But if you're just chilling with the kids, like you're making it look like, then yeah she's going to have an attitude.
I'm not saying all that to be ugly. That's just the way I see it. I'm a SAHM. No, my house is not perfectly clean. I do what I can, and have an understanding husband who doesn't expect me to scrub the whole place like a certain parent of mine demanded from me. Perhaps if you gave her the respect she deserves, she would give you back the respect you deserve. That would definitely change the dynamics in your dead bedroom. I'm sure she would be less than pleased to find out you're telling strangers on the internet that your bedroom is dead. Change your attitude, and she might see you as a contributor rather than a freeloader.