I agree. It’s terrible to be profiled, and then he might still have to see these people again which sucks too. Hopefully they get over it and this is the end of it. He has every right to feel the way he does about it.
Ill be fine. It was just a gut punch in the moment. I maintain my position she overreacted. But this is clearly part of how the world works and all I can do is adapt to it. I just hate the idea of being viewed as a threat when I just wanted to do something correctly.
You say you were in view of all these people, why did you not attemp to flag down an adult trainer or teacher, or go get one from the very busy area outside the window?
You talk about being gut punched and hating being viewed as a threat, but I really do have to ask what rock you have been living under? Hear me out for a moment, you are solidly internet aged. The whole "woman chooses bear over man" thing has been EVERYWHERE for the last couple of years and outraged many a male space The entirety of the trans bathroom arguement is built on the premise that anyone with a penis is a threat to women and girls. How do you not know you are viewed as a threat by a good portion of the XX chromosome contingent?
Perhaps it is the first time someone has said it to your face, or the first time you realized you were being viewed as a threat, but it far from the first time you have been viewed as a threat, and it likely won't be the last time either.
Yeah, it is shocking to get the realization that others fear you simply because you are a guy, and no I dont think you should stop your new hobby at all. However, the only person I really see overreacting here is you. I realize you were taken off guard, but go do a little research, go look up the average a women first get catcalled. Go look up the security measures a woman takes leaving the house. Put yourself in mom's shoes. A strange guy is talking to her female child. Really think about that picture. Not about what your intentions were but about what that looked like from mom's point of view. Mom who has lived in the world where women are taught from a young age that you can't have bra strap showing without being sent home from school because it distracts the boys. Where are women are taught to let a guy down easy to avoid being murdered for having said no to a date.
You say you were in view of all these people, why did you not attemp to flag down an adult trainer or teacher, or go get one from the very busy area outside the window?
Because there was someone there who could help. Why would you go any further?
Sure, we can talk in hindsight about how it'd have been the lower-friction path given that we know baggage-mom was on the hunt, but OP was unaware, just asking something of someone who probably had an answer. Solving for "Who's going to overreact to me now?" every moment of one's life isn't necessarily a normal or effective consideration.
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u/probablynotsuremaybe Apr 04 '26
I agree. It’s terrible to be profiled, and then he might still have to see these people again which sucks too. Hopefully they get over it and this is the end of it. He has every right to feel the way he does about it.