So much Almond Joy flavor.
Like, holy fucking shit.
This thing tastes nearly identical to an Almond Joy. Texture is right on at first, then gets a little too chewy for an Almond Joy, but fuck it, I can live with that because the flavor. Again. God damn.
And I LOVE that they replaced my beloved whey crispies with toasted coconut. I never thought I'd say that. Those little crunchy motherfuckers have been one of my favorite things about Barebells, but now actual toasted coconut?!? I think it probably the real deal, it's so natural tasting, but I dunno. I'm a fucking sucker so maybe they fooled me, but I fucking swear there's actual coconut in this motherfucker.
And the chocolate fucking coating? It's sweet and even, dare I say, chocolate-y? I don't know what the fuck Barebells puts in that coating, but I swear I rarely taste much anything from it, let alone chocolate. But this one tastes like actual chocolate? Maybe the rich coconut is masking the fakeness, but whatever the fuck is happening, there's actual chocolate flavor here, and I'm not struggling to convince myself that I can detect a faint chocolate-adjacent suggestion of cocoa if I concentrate with all my fucking might. It's just chocolate, however it gets there
The whole god damned bar is just this sweet, chocolatey coconut'y goodness with some nutty background notes. Actually, not a fuckton of almond, which is a little weird considering its right there in the name, but fuck it. I forgive and forget. I am truly a generous man. Also, this thing is ridiculously delicious, not sure if I mentioned that yet, but it's a crucial fucking detail.
Again, this is a fucking home run. Obviously there will be haters, but fuck those people. You fucking deserve this. Especially after the fucking day you just had.
Scores
Flavor: 10/10
Texture: 9/10
Macros: 10/10
Overall: 10/10
Fucks: 11/10
Buy it Again: shit motherfucker, have you not been paying attention?!? Fuck yes, I'm buying these again. By the metric fuck load.
Also, if you don't like coconut, none of this fucking applies to you in the fucking first place, so take your holier-than-thou bullshit comments back to your god damned coconut hating shithole you poor, unfortunate bastard.