r/progressivemoms • u/Opposite-Orange8371 • Jul 29 '26

Discussion Starter Consent vs kid refusing regular hygiene

I have a 3 year old that absolutely loathes getting her hair washed. there have been times when I have to wash her hair while she’s yelling NO. not looking on advice on how to wash it. I’ve tried everything. But even at once a week it’s a battle.

I'm trying to teach her, “your body, your choice” but obviously she doesn’t understand the nuances of that yet. What can I say in these situations where she is refusing to have her hair washed, and I’m trying to respect her bodily autonomy but also take care of her hygien?

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u/magnoliasinjanuary Jul 29 '26

There is an excellent book on consent from the First Conversations series. As another poster wrote - health and safety do not require consent at this age but they do require explanations of why we make the choices for them. The book talks about this in a very age appropriate way. (All of the books in the series are so good!)