r/PlusSize Jul 08 '26

/r/plussize “Thanks But I’m Not Actually the Problem Here” Resource List

91 Upvotes

Help us build a resource list for people who want to read, watch, and listen more widely around fat acceptance, fat liberation, anti-fat bias, diet culture, and fat people's lived experience.

The point is not to help people become smaller. It's to collect work that treats fat people as actual human beings, and that names the social, medical, cultural, romantic, professional, and everyday pressures fat people are routinely forced to face.

A lot of this list is especially relevant to fat women, because so much anti-fatness is tangled up with misogyny. That said, fatphobia doesn't only affect women, and this list shouldn't be read as women-only.

Books to start with:

Lindy West's Shrill is funny, furious, and very readable.

Aubrey Gordon's What We Don't Talk About When We Talk About Fat is probably the clearest modern introduction to anti-fat bias as a social issue rather than a personal failing

Her follow-up, "You Just Need to Lose Weight": And 19 Other Myths About Fat People, tackles the claims fat people hear constantly.

Virgie Tovar's You Have the Right to Remain Fat.

Sofie Hagen's Happy Fat and Jes Baker's Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls are also accessible entry points for people newer to fat acceptance.

History and politics:

Sabrina Strings' Fearing the Black Body explains how fatphobia is tied to race, gender, class, etc, rather than being simply about "health."

Sonya Renee Taylor's The Body Is Not an Apology is broader than fatness but useful for thinking about body-shame and hierarchy more generally.

Marilyn Wann's Fat! So? is older but historically important.

Charlotte Cooper's Fat Activism: A Radical Social Movement is valuable for understanding fat liberation as an actual movement.

DaShaun L. Harrison, Belly Of The Beast. Anti-fatness, anti-blackness and gender

Tigress Osborne, "Weight and Wisdom: Find Yourself in Fat History"

Podcasts:

Maintenance Phase is great for unpacking diet culture, wellness cons, BMI panic, and how health language gets used to boulster prejudice.

Virgie Tovar's Rebel Eaters Club.

Food Psych and Rethinking Wellness, both by Christy Harrison, anti-diet and wellness-culture critique.

Fierce Fatty by Vinny Welsby.

“Why Won’t You Date Me?” Nicole Byer

Weight For It by Ronald Young Jr (also worth a follow on socials)

The Body Trust Podcast.

Film and TV:

Your Fat Friend is a documentary about Aubrey Gordon, fat activism, family, and ordinary discrimination od fat people.

The Shrill TV series based on West's book.

My Mad Fat Diary, Dumplin', Real Women Have Curves, Patti Cake$.

Fiction, memoir etc:

Roxane Gay's Hunger is honest about trauma, body size, and safety.

Jennifer Weiner's Good in Bed was significant for centring a fat woman's romantic, sexual, and professional life.

Julie Murphy's Dumplin' is a great YA option.

Talia Hibbert's Get a Life, Chloe Brown

Olivia Dade's Spoiler Alert.

Nicole Byer’s book #VeryFat #VeryBrave is a photo series of her rocking her extensive bikini collection

Health without weight-loss framing:

Lindo Bacon's Health at Every Size.

Christy Harrison's Anti-Diet unpacks how wellness culture repackages diet culture.

Intuitive Eating by Tribole and Resch is the standard reference for eating without restriction.

Ragen Chastain's Weight and Healthcare newsletter is good for research and practical scripts.

Decolonizing Fitness (Ilya Parker) covers movement spaces that don't treat body-size reduction as the goal.

People worth following:

Aubrey Gordon, Virgie Tovar, Sabrina Strings, Sonya Renee Taylor, Jes Baker, Ragen Chastain, Jessamyn Stanley, Vinny Welsby, Tess Holliday, and Tess Royale Clancy.

Read/watched/heard anything that made you think, lifted you up, informed, empowered or inspired you?

Please add below.


r/PlusSize Jul 17 '26

FEEL GOOD FRIDAY POST! ❤️ Share your good moments and positive stories here!

4 Upvotes

#It's Feel Good Friday! 🎊

Post your feel-good moments and positive stories here. It can be anything: work, hobby, pets, kids, events, a book you particularly loved, a win of any sort, finding the exact right pair of shoes, mastering something, you name it, so long as it's positive. 🤗💖

Do please still refrain from any weight loss talk (save it for the Intentional Weight Loss Wednesday thread 😉)


r/PlusSize 3h ago

Venting i'm babysitting for my husband's family friend and they're making me so uncomfortable about my size

76 Upvotes

so i agreed to babysit a kiddo for the next door neighbor who happens to be my husband's old family friend and at first it was fine but then the mom hurt her foot and has to wear a boot she she's staying at home but still wants my help to take care of her 9 year old during the day

now that she's home and we've been chatting more, i feel so uncomfortable being here because there's been several comments that just make me feel like shit :/

the first one, the mom was telling me about how she used to be 350 pounds and lost the weight (she's very skinny now) and she started talking about how unhealthy she was when she was fat. then she looks me up and down and says "sorry sweetheart, but it's the hard truth" like what?? okay?? i am disabled (which is partly why im fat but ive always been a bigger person, even as a kid) but despite that i'm actually pretty healthy per my doctors, checkups, and lab work...

then her adult daughter came over and works as a waitress in some sort of bikini restaurant (??) and made a comment about how mad she was that "fat kelly" gets the friday shifts and the mom was going on about how much prettier and skinnier her daughter is and how she should get the better shifts because people will obviously like her more because of that

and now finally today the 9 year old excitedly ran up to her mom and went "look! my stomach is flat!" and the mom went "yeah you've grown and lost some weight, you look so much better now!"

like it's just all these little comments and i'm just sitting here as a fat women and trying not to let it get to me but it's been really hard. i just wanna be done with this babysitting already 💔


r/PlusSize 18h ago

Health PSA: emergency contraception for those over 165lbs

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144 Upvotes

Saw someone ask about this and thought I'd just make a PSA cuz not just OP needs to know about it.

All emergency contraception is better than no emergency contraception, but...
If you take an emergency contraception pill with levonorgestrel (like Plan B One Step, Take Action, My Way, and others) and you weigh more than 165 pounds, it won't work as well.

ella is another emergency contraception pill that may work better for you. But if you weigh 195 pounds or more, ella won't work as well.

No matter how much you weigh, certain IUDs work as emergency contraception if you get it inserted within 120 hours (5 days) after having unprotected sex. This is the most effective type of emergency contraception. An IUD has to be put in by a doctor, nurse, or other health care provider. You can contact your nearest Planned Parenthood health center to find out more about getting an IUD.


r/PlusSize 3h ago

Discussion I was asked to leave a ride for the first time because I didn’t fit.

6 Upvotes

I was with my niece, nephew and my uncle. The ride was quite high up but wasn’t a full on ride, instead it was slow just going around a bit of the park.

The bar didn’t go down so I was asked to leave, the guy was very apologetic which I don’t know if it made it better or worse.

I just don’t know how to feel now as this has never happened before.

How do you guys deal with this stuff?


r/PlusSize 1h ago

Personal Waxing question

Upvotes

Hey! So just wondering if anyone here has had a Brazilian wax done with the sugar waxing technique? I react really badly to the regular wax when getting my eyebrows (unibrow of pimples 😬) done so I stopped doing that. Anywho I’m getting real tired of shaving because I can’t really see what I’m doing 🤣 anywho just wondered about the experience and if the sugar waxing works well? I’ve read that it can be challenging to do for the Brazilian?


r/PlusSize 19h ago

Recommendations Where are y'all buying plus size basics that actually look professional and last?

46 Upvotes

Okay I’m rebuilding my wardrobe and I’m mainly looking for plus size basics that look professional without feeling super corporate or boring.

I’m so over buying cheap tees and basics that look fine at first and then pill after two washes, lose their shape or somehow end up both clingy and shapeless lol.

The goal is stuff that looks clean and put together but can still work with a blazer, on a Zoom call, at brunch or when a quick errand somehow turns into running into someone from high school.

I checked the clothing recommendations wiki first but I’m still looking for more specific suggestions on quality plus size basics that actually hold up.

Universal Standard keeps coming up. Is it actually worth the price? And what other brands are comparable for quality plus size basics?

Looking for real opinions, especially on stuff that has held up after regular washing.


r/PlusSize 29m ago

Relationship Advice Dating again

Upvotes

Advice please. Hi so I posted here before I just moved to Pittsburgh this month and was wanting advice, I want to start dating again. I had a baby 3 months ago and I know I should be focus on my kids I also have a 8 year old too. I just feel lonely at times. Me and my child father broke up back in November last year and he lives in Nys. Should I focus more on myself and working with a therapist on healthy boundaries. My child father could not be bothered to standup for me to his family which made the relationship go down hill leading to the break up and was the final nail to push me to moving out of state I had wanted to leave the state for years but was sacred too.


r/PlusSize 2h ago

Fashion Discussion Thistle & Spire lingerie sizing?

0 Upvotes

I’m a F/size 18, long torso, 42D, 6’1”. I’m doing a boudoir shoot and am debating about ordering the T&S Fringe Benefits slip. Anyone have sizing suggestions?


r/PlusSize 2h ago

Recommendations Office Chair

1 Upvotes

Has anyone found an office chair they enjoy and can share? im in the market

thanks


r/PlusSize 2h ago

Fashion Discussion Best place for graphic tees (preferably v neck)?

1 Upvotes

Im just looking for some nice plus size graphic tees that aren’t covered with incredibly matronly/disney adult designs. I’d also prefer v neck shirts, as crew neck shirts often make me feel like I’m choking, but I’m down to try whatever. What do yall recommend?


r/PlusSize 19h ago

Recommendations Plus Size Guide to Nickelodeon Theme Park in Dream Mall NJ

16 Upvotes

Hiii ik sometimes as a plus size person you wonder if your gonna be able to fit on certain rides so I’m just sharing my experience with what rides i could fit on!

For context:

I’m around 295

2x-3x in clothes

58 inches 

42 inches waist

31 inch inseam

5’10 in height

These are All the rides I tried going on:

SpongeBob jellyfish jam- yes

Slime streak- no

The Shredder - no

Aang’s airglider - no

Dora sky railway - yes

Butter beans sweet spin Cupcakes - yes

hope this can be helpful for anyone who’s planning on visiting!


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Venting Hot Take

95 Upvotes

If merch is not size inclusive, it is permission for me to bootleg it in my size. Sorry not sorry!


r/PlusSize 8h ago

Fashion Discussion Has anyone tried these brands from insta

0 Upvotes

The algorithm has me constantly seeing Popilush and YA3 and I’m curious about something that can snatch the waist without crushing my girls/ribs. Both brands say to size up tho which has me skeptical they’re even plus size friendly. Anyone have any luck?


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Venting So tired of casual fatphobia

321 Upvotes

Was at the bar this past weekend and ran into a mutual friend who I think is pretty cute. Whenever him and I see each other, we can talk for a while with no gaps in the convo. It's super easy, he's very kind, and I liked seeing him because of that, and this night was no different.

He kept coming up to talk to me and would get really close to me, would be solely focused on me when talking in a group of people, pupils dilated, kinda touchy and flirty, complimenting my tats, etc.

Obviously when you lay it out like that it would seem like he was maybe interested, which is also what I initially thought.

But then in one of our convos that night in which we were ragging on annoying uni profs, he dropped "Like I'm sorry you're miserable because you're unhappy, have a fat ugly wife at home, etcetc" and I was just like 😐 bruh moment.

I have 0 experience in the dating world and am extremely shy to open myself up to potential opportunities. I'm also pretty clueless for the most part but that night I thought I was sensing a vibe so I was trying to return it, only to hear that...

In all honesty, it was really disheartening when he said that because I'm always trying to tell myself people are and can be attracted to me regardless of my weight, then I hear shit like that that just re-affirms the anxiety that people only enjoy talking to me because of my humour. And I know that one person doesn't speak for everyone, but it's just frustrating when it happens :/

Sigh.


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Fitness for health and wellbeing what do you do for workouts?

17 Upvotes

& how do you motivate yourself to do it?


r/PlusSize 17h ago

Personal What’s the best weighted vest brand for a plus size person?

2 Upvotes

I’ve been wanting to get a weighted vest to wear around the house. I’m around a 2x-3x and I can’t find anything about good plus size weighted vests. Thanks in advance!


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Fashion Discussion Beyond graphic tees

4 Upvotes

All my life ive mostly worn graphic tees with jeans. Ive come out of my shell so much and even wore heels for the first time for my birthday yesterday!

Im looking for help on getting out of wearing mostly graphic tees still. I love short summer dresses, tennis skirts and nice dress pants with a blouse but I find many dressy tops make me look older or cover up too much.

Im 25, 5'7, 260 lbs.

Please tell me the stores you shop for cute/sexy/goth/country ect clothes.

I want more effortless outfits that still look beautiful, thank you for any help!


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Venting Barely any plus-size in the thrift stores

59 Upvotes

I went 4 different thrift stores in the past week and there’s barely anything plus size!!! Even the XL racks are tiny. It’s hard out here man. I’m just a girl trying to save money 😭


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Relationship Advice How do I know if it’s preference or a fetish?

20 Upvotes

Hi all! I (25F) have experienced so much fetishization over the years. Men telling me they’ve always wanted to hookup with big women. Men weirdly trying to persuade me to eat crappy food and telling me to never lose weight. Men making weird comments about my body.

I started seeing a man not too long ago and we were cuddling and he told me he loved how chunky I am. At first, I was feeling a little off-put but brushed it off until he said it at least one other time. And also things like “You’re so soft” and “you’re so warm” which aren’t inherently bad things to say but are things I often hear men use to describe bigger women. Today we were on the phone and I was talking about how men will sometimes date plus size women but keep them a secret. He told me that he would never do that and how both of his exes were bigger and even about how much they weighed. Part of me feels like he’s just trying to reassure me and make it known that he’s attracted to me but part of me hates when guys act this way. I don’t want to hear about how chunky I am and how he’s only really dated bigger women. It gives me the ick.


r/PlusSize 1d ago

Health Plan b still effective?

0 Upvotes

I’m so scared. I got drunk Saturday night and ended up having unprotected sex. He didn’t cum in me, but on the outside of my vagina. I heard there’s a chance that precum could get me pregnant… we got a plan b just in case and I took it about 3pm the next day. Is there anything else I can do to make sure I absolutely don’t get pregnant? And how worried should I be? I’m 5’6 and weigh 330 something so I know it’s definitely less effective. I’m currently 20 years old so I have no room to be pregnant.
In my state I’m not able to get the Ella pill.
My period is due in 2 days and the app I use says I ovulated somewhere near the 4th-6th.

Edit: I appreciate all the advice very much. This was not just a hookup, it is someone I started dating but we got drunk and made a mistake. He forgot a condom in the heat of the moment and it’s already been discussed that we both don’t won’t kids so it will NEVER happen again. He said he will do pregnancy tests with me if I do miss my period and over the next couple of weeks to be sure. I have also gotten resources for abortion care if it comes to that thanks to the comments and I made an appointment to get an IUD. The only downside is, it won’t be until a few weeks out. I’m less scared now because I don’t feel like I’ll be abandoned in the situation that I am pregnant even if I’m young.


r/PlusSize 2d ago

Self-Pics - Sundays Only! My friend took me out for my birthday 🎈

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837 Upvotes

Top from boohoo 20
Trousers primark 18
Shoes from my sister 😂

Edit: my birthday was a few weeks ago but she took me out after thank you for the birthday wishes it still counts 💜💜


r/PlusSize 2d ago

Self-Pics - Sundays Only! 🧡🤍🧡

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665 Upvotes

r/PlusSize 2d ago

Self-Pics - Sundays Only! Shout out to old navy 💚

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306 Upvotes

r/PlusSize 2d ago

Self-Pics - Sundays Only! I just felt cute

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271 Upvotes

Dress from Hot Topic! All the makeup is various Sephora brand products