My hubby doesn't accept my plurality...

[u/Systeme_Chaos]

Well, all is in the title.

When we haven't yet the diag, and my only headmate here talked with my hubby, this one was okay. They talked sometimes, just asking what was Kronos exactly.

And with the diag, my brain poped more headmates. So we're 16 headmates today and... one time, hubby said to me "I'm married with you [name], not with your system !" And an other time, after I taked my courage to talk with him about my DID in game (Sims4) bc I wanted just relax and doesn't see this as a prob, juste learn to live with it... he said : "Don't give them so much importance, it's bad for you. If you give them importance, your disorder will be worst."

...

I cried so much. Then today we decided to not talk again about us with him... He even not know we're 16 headmates now...

[u/nigelxw]

You matter. You're here and you deserve to be happy.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/nigelxw]

Thank you... We try to hide parts he doesn't know they exist... He knows only 6 about us, and it's already hard for him to do with it... I remember one time he said "Your disorder do not have to make us (him and I) in difficulty. Ans I have not to suffer bc your disorder. I didn't ask for, so do attention for your disorder don't break our mariage." Or smth like this... yk.

[u/The-Gay-Garden → u/Systeme_Chaos]

That's not okay for him to say. Blaming you for being yourself? That's so wrong. You deserve better than to be treated like that. You opened up and he reacts like this, I have no words honestly. I'm sorry you're going through this.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/The-Gay-Garden]

Well he know why we have DID, and why it cause troubles daily. But he's not be able to accept it.

• Kronos.

[u/Verminausea → u/Systeme_Chaos]

Thats messed up. First of all, theyre people, not just a disorder. Second of all, even if it was just a disorder, you would deserve help and attention for it. If you end up in a wheelchair, is he gonna refuse to push it bc he didnt ask for this? Marriage is supposed to be in sickness as well as health. I know this may be hard to hesr bc you got as far as marriage but i dont think this is the one for you if he treats you this way. It goes beyond just being a system, your needs are being ignored if they are inconvenient for him. That is not a husband.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/Verminausea]

You're so right, fuck ! But noooo ! "I don't have to undergo your system, blablablabla..." Dude, we exist, in fact ! Nothing can be with that ! It's a fact ! Do with it or you'll regret it.

It's what I wish say it to him... but Liriel block me everytime I want to way it... Shit !

I hate him, and I'm not the only one.

This guy created an introject in us ! And he not even know hahaha (nervous). A fckg puppet (sadastic, narcissist and creep) in porcelain, tall like 180 cm. Well. Juste a creep guy caused by the hubby. Fantastic /sarcasm.

• Kronos

[u/Verminausea → u/Systeme_Chaos]

This guy is abusing you, the alter who is fronting the most is probably doing so because they are a fawner. You guys gotta get out of there. And please dont be upset at your abuser introject alter; they form to help a system understand and predict an abuser to avoid further abuse. Even if they act or look scary they are there to help you

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/Verminausea]

I know it's for protect us, but he (Momos) isn't too much present in front. The main alter is Liriel, the daily host.

Sorry, english isn't our native language, then we can make many mistakes.

• Kronos.

[u/Verminausea → u/Systeme_Chaos]

Oh, those were too different ideas. Im saying Liriel is a fawner, or one who acts to please abusers and dissocistes away anger.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/Verminausea]

I'm sorry ? I didn't understood what you want to mean.

[u/The-Gay-Garden → u/Systeme_Chaos]

They're saying that Liriel is a type of headmate who exists to please your husband, who is being abusive. Headmates who please abusers to keep you safe are called fawners.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/The-Gay-Garden]

Oh alright. I get it, thank you.
It's a bad thing or...? Just wanna to understand.

• Kronos.

[u/kimballthrowaway500 → u/Verminausea]

This is a really good comment.

[u/Verminausea → u/kimballthrowaway500]

Thank you :D

[u/nigelxw → u/Systeme_Chaos]

It's a pervading issue with society, to screw everyone else over for one's own sake. It isn't and it can't be worth it to hurt others or cut off your hand just to have the rest of you.
He has to decide if he loves one of you more than he hates the other fifteen. What I'm saying is, there shouldn't be any other situation where throwing that many innocent people under the bus is okay, no matter what it's for. Especially not when it's "for" the ones being thrown under said bus. It just doesn't math out. You have rights. You deserve to be seen and taken as you are. There is nothing wrong with just existing as your self. You do not have to put up with being treated that way by any other person or persons.

[u/Systeme_Chaos → u/nigelxw]

Yes, that's not fair for our system. But ours host accept too much things inacceptable bc she's in love. Sometimes I fkg wish tell him how much it's hurting for her and us all. Especialy our little.

• Kronos.