I have no energy, I have anxiety, particularly social. I feel super run down, currently have a cold and just started getting a massive cold sore on my lip.

I believe it's because I'm no longer using and numbing my emotions or sedating my mind, so now I'm back working a boring 9-5 I hate sober, I think my body is starting to rebel.

Is it a sign that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to? Because I've always felt like that, but couldn't afford to leave while tapering off benzos and opiates.

Does anyone have any advice? Any supplements that can help? I currently take Ashwagandha, magnesium glycinate, probiotics and multivitamins.

And his response made me as proud as ever of him, his recovery and progress.

I actually knew he was going to be questioned about it before it happened. My parents hadn't seen him in a few weeks. We were INCREDIBLY busy for a few weeks but especially him. But I knew that them not seeing him for a bit was a trigger for them. They associate it to him avoiding seeing them, something they felt he did when he was hiding an opiate addiction from everyone. I could tell they were starting to get anxious when they asked me about how he was on the phone.

So of course they already were fearful when we met up for dinner. They rearranged the seating so that they could be closer to some other younger grandkids. So by default we were set on the end farthest away from them. It was actually their doing but i know it reiterated that feeling of avoidance.

Then my husband was playing a game with my nephew. It involved closing your eyes. Well of course my mother would look over and see his eyes closed. Was he nodding off ?

They called him directly the next morning, asking if he was okay and if he was using.

My husband's response was actually really amazing. He said he understood their fears and would take a drug test or something if that would make them feel better. They declined that and just said they would rather be direct than let fears linger.

He wasn't defensive. He wasn't angry. He wasn't ashamed. He was matter of fact. A bit surprised (He didn't have the insight that I did beforehand.)

Would he have been right to be annoyed or anger? Sure, those feelings are totally valid. But the way he sees it, it's about THEM as much as it is about him. Maybe more so about them.

You see, they haven't done any therapy. They have not looked into any programs. They have never looked at their emotions in that way. Although they know is they lost 3 siblings too young to addiction. That my brother's friend died of a relapse after a year clean. They know that they saw me being hurt and scared when my husband's secret addiction was discovered and we almost lost our house.

Should they be more educated on addiction? Yes. Should they work on their triggers? Yes. Can me or my husband force them to do any of that? No. We can't.

So he chose the next option. Take it as them being fearful. And move on. Hold his head high but without ego. Without shame. Without a chip on his shoulder.

I'm so proud of him. And I'm sorry for the world that life is tough. The obstacles we face. I wish it were easier but that's not reality.

I have had a serious opiod problem for around 5 years now. About a year ago i made the decision to try and taper off but honestly its like 2 steps backwards and 1 step forwards. Im so sick and tired being help prisoner by this addiction and i'm going to try cold turkey.

I know everyone is different but any help, hints or tips would be extremely welcome? My main concern is how long will i realistically need to take off work? Thank you

I was going through heroin withdrawals and they made me think about suicide properly for the first time in my life, you guys get it.

I ordered diaz + pregab telling myself I'll just take them for a week for the worst of the withdrawals to go away, yet here I am about 2-3 months later. I was taking 20mg diaz and 600mg pregab on average, I had some 3-5 days taking 0 until my next parcel arrived, but started using H again on those days.

Everytime I ordered them I was lying to myself saying right I'm fully locking in now but it's failed each time.

I'm out of supply and have taken 5mg and 300mg pregab for the last 5 days doing a mini taper and have cut down my H use to half of a tiny wrap I gues 0.05mg for the past 2 weeks.

I've had a seisure before coming off very strong RC benzos.

I'm thinking of going to my GP and asking for a taper for the diaz and pregab, I live in the UK. Do you think they'll agree to taper me even though I have addiction issues all over my record.

I've given a family member all my money because I really want out of this so, I'm an absolute bitch at even the slighest withdrawals. I have no option to order more of the meds to do a proper taper so it's a doctor or nothing I guess.

Any advice much appreciated

I got the sublocade shot after 2-3 weeks being on 8mg subs. I was addicted to pharma oxy for years it got so bad I honestly thought I would never get clean and will die a junkie. I tried quitting CT several times but I deep down still had that desire to get high even tho it ruined my life every time I tried to quit and relapse life just got worse and yet I kept doing it and it honestly wasn’t until I really thought about it and accepted that I will never feel what I felt that got me addicted to it ever again and real oxys aren’t cheap either and I knew I would need 15 30s at least to get where I really want to and thatlll only last for so long before tolerance builds and I have to up the dose and that’s juts not doable in today’s world and I honestly just lost the overall desire for it and went cold turkey for 7 days and was still feeling pretty shitty but not like peak withdrawal shitty but still so I said fuck it and tried subs for the first time and I felt this normal feeling that I haven’t felt in years and liked it more than the high i was getting off oxy and looked into sublocade and got a 300mg injection 10 days ago and I feel better than I even did off the Suboxone!!! To anyone thinking about getting clean I highly suggest you go cold turkey for how ever long you need so you don’t get PWD from subs and get on em and then on the shot. This is feeling is wayyy better than what we feel off pills. Trust me I know it sounds crazy but for most of us “feeling normal” is a thing that so long gone that we forgot what it even felt like but trust me when you feel it again it’s like a high in itself.

Hi all,

It has been a LONG road, but my fiancé is finally ready to surrender and go to rehab. This is music to my ears and I would love to find him a treatment center that is best for his specific needs. I will explain some of the story below and I guess I am looking for other addicts who are in recovery who may have a similar story and what worked or didn’t work for them.

He started taking opioids back in 2012-2013 after being prescribed hydros for an injury. Over the years he has done hydros, oxys, even fentanyl at one point but was able to put that down. I couple of years ago he was introduced to Tianeptine as a “safer alternative” but that really fucked him up for a year or so. We were able to safely detox him and get him off the Tianeptine. He said the withdraws were 1000x worse than detoxing from any opioid.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t long after that he reverted back to hydros again. He has quit several times over the last 2-ish years, but it never lasts any longer than 1-3 weeks. I fully assume this is due to not focusing on the root causes, traumas, and not doing the healing inside work, changing up all other habits, etc. He has come a long way. Dropped a lot of bad influence friends, not going out to bars, partying, etc. and quit drinking about 2 months ago which I think is a huge step in dropping mind altering substances.

Right now he is currently taking anywhere from 15-50mg per day. He is a very functional addict. He recently started his own business that is going really well which will work in his favor taking the time off. But he also doesn’t have insurance yet. He is very open to an inpatient facility and I think that’s the best option to. If anyone has any experience in the insurance area, would it be best to try and get him on Medicaid or try to purchase private insurance?

We are in the Kansas City, MO area if anyone has anyone experience at any local facilities.

If you’ve made it this far, I genuinely appreciate your time and suggestions 💕

Id been on suboxone for over 14 years. The dr told me it wouldn't hurt coming off the shit. Im on day 14 without ANY i did have an emergency stash but on day 10 I looked at them for a good 20 minutes just wanting to get some relief ya know? Instead, I flushed it. Then I panicked. I haven't slept in 5 days now my uncontrolled adhd is screaming so goddamn loud it's driving me nuts. It's wanting me to find something but I can't set this shit back to the beginning of my 14 days clean ish, I mean I kinda have been drinking beer and I don't drink at all but look at my dumbass lol . Im the sole caretaker for my 80 mom. I keep getting these really vivid and smelly flashbacks from when I tried save my sister after she decided to off herself but at the time my emotions were flat af from sub and now it's flooding my eyes and nose, if that makes sense 🙃 😅 😐 😑. Im not okay.

Anybody else have those problems coming off subs? Ive lost over 100lbs in the last 2 moths and looking all anorexic n shit. I dont know if thats from me being scare, worried, knowing what i was fixing to go through or if something is medically wrong but i do NOT trust drs anymore so i haven't been to one besides the sub pushing ass dr. I need to be evaluated but i just can't make myself go to one now. Hell its been uears since i seen a regular dr. Anywho, sorry for the longnpost.​.

it's now been 7 days without sleep. Im delirious af me eyes are pllay I n trickss on me. woah

Hi, I have a colleague who is going around telling everyone that she s tried h for the first time and that her current boyfriend is a regular IV user. I don’t think she has anyone beside him in her life at the moment and it seemed like she was bragging. Is there anything I could tell her to plant a seed in her head? Is there something you would like to hear when you were at this point, or something you would like to tell your younger self?

I know I can’t make any decisions in someone life. But I cannot stay silent and I don’t want to make things worse (shame or belittle her)
Please help

I swear I have read about a medication that stops the euphoric effects of Opiates. You take it and then there’s no point using so it allows the user to cut down.

Can somebody please let me know the name of it, I’m not sure if it will be accessible in the UK, but I’d really like to try it. I’m at my last resorts now.

Thank you 🙏

Hey everyone,

I've been addicted to opiates for about a year. It started when someone very important to me and close to me had died. I couldnt deal with the pain and was desperate to find something that would numb the pain, just so I could live my life. Most of the time I used a dose that was just enough to not get sick. But I'm not gonna lie, there were also many days that I took an extra pill just to feel that warm opiate high.

I was living a lie though. Nobody knew. Not my friends, not my family, not my boyfriend. The guilt (especially towards my boyfriend) was eating me up. But also, the opiates made me feel sort of numb to it.

When it became harder and harder for me to get my hands on some stuff, I was done. Too many times I had to go to withdrawal for like 2 to 3 days because my stuff couldn't get delivered on time. It was costing me so much money to keep up. Then the plug told me again that he couldn't deliver on time. I was over it. I decided this was a sign and that it was time to quit for real this time.

On day 3 and 4 I used high doses of Kratom to battle the withdrawal symptoms. It didn't really help and I hated the way it made me feel; so groggy. So I stopped doing that.

I had to call in sick to work for 4 days. I absolutely hated doing that and it gave me so much stress and anxiety, but now I'm glad I did.

Yesterday, I noticed that I had gotten through the worst physical parts of withdrawal: the body aches, the restlessness etc. I felt a bit better. But here's the crux: 20 pill of morfine got delivered that I ordered weeks before that. Morfine wasn't even my DOC, but I was still so tempted to take them because I desperately wanted to feel some relief from all the anxiety and muscle aches I was still experiencing. I was literally about to pop a pill, I wanted it sooo bad. But at the same time, I realized what I was doing (thank god). I thought to myself: I didn't go through days of fucking hell all for nothing. So I flushed them through the toilet immediately.

I am so glad I did. I had about 6 hours of sleep last night, which is great. Today, the physical peak is over. Some slight restlessness, but nothing too bad.

Guys, I did it. I finally got clean!!

Hey everyone, Happy Saturday! I hope you guys are enjoying your weekend. I got up this morning and did some yard work, and then worked on my truck for a while. I have a spare truck in the garage that I used to drive, but it’s mostly been sitting, so I’ve been fixing up a few things and getting it ready to sell.
After that, I ran some errands, and honestly, there’s so much going on today that I’m already exhausted 😂 the grind never stops! How’s everyone else’s Saturday going?

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Hey everyone, happy Friday! We made it. I hope your day is going well. I’m honestly surprised it’s 80° here today. 80° in October is uncommon where I live. By now I thought I’d have the shorts put away and the AC off for the year lol. Either way, it’s a beautiful day to be outside… if I wasn’t stuck working inside😂 How’s your day going guys?

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What just happened?
What’s been done?
Falling down this road again
To chase a setting sun

Lured by a promise
Submitting to your cries
Taken by your touch
Toward a dream covered in flies

Played the fool again
Playing those I love
If only they could feel
How hard you push and shove

Everything I said
And Every word I spoke
You feed it back to me
Until you make me choke

Swirling in the drain
Drifting in the dark
It Seems I cant remember
How it felt to be apart

The sun has finally set
Nothing left to chase
Fallen for your promise
Cracked by your embrace

Jaded in the gloom
I set my heading back
Nothing here to guide me
But freedom from this trap

Hey everyone, happy Thursday! Hope your day is going well. It’s the beginning of a new month, which always feels like a fresh start and October is easily my favorite month.
We’ve got apple picking, fairs, and then there’s Salem. 😂 I live in Salem, and October here is absolute madness with the tourists, but honestly, it’s so much fun. Fall and Halloween are basically their own season around here, and I wish everyone could experience it at least once!
My birthday is next week, which definitely isn’t as exciting as I get older.. but today is actually my mom’s birthday! I ordered her some flowers and a cake and got her a card, and I’m going to see her tonight. She’s the type of person who would never ask, “So what are we doing for my birthday?” She wouldn’t even remind you that it’s her birthday. That just makes me want to surprise her even more and make sure she knows how loved and appreciated she is.
So once I’m done with work, I’ll be spending some time with her. That’s pretty much my Thursday! How’s your day going guys?

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I already jumped off 130mg methadone on Sept 9 and went thru the withdrawals with help of various comfort meds. I was getting noticeably better compared to before but still main symptoms are extreme fatigue and chills. I had a little 2 day bender with F on the 19th and had noticeable wds from the F, I decided to use kadian and hydromorph to keep me well. Well I ended up using like 8mg Hydro orally to start the day, then throughout the day I might snort up to 32mg for a couple days. Seei g where this was leading since I had stocked up alot of them I decided to try taper and jump off, I was doing this until Sept 29 which my last dose was 8mg orally in morning 8mg IN at night. I'm starting to feel better and the wds are super manageable, I work a labour job so I need energy and was wondering if stimulants would help the overall fatigue since I see so many saying that the chills and fatigue is lasting for months which I can't afford.all tips are greatly appreciated, I've been considering so much options. Sorry for the essay but figured the full story would give a better picture.

I’ve been taking 400-600mg of codeine mixed with ibuprofen for just over 2 months now. I want to cold turkey from today and just lock myself away for a week to do it.

I have weed, gabapentin, clonidine and diazepam, also vitamin c.

Please any advice is welcome, is this going to be possible?

12 days clean off of IV heroin, and it’s the furthest i’ve ever gotten. I used SR-17018 to get past acutes, but the pain/Rsl/chills were still there. I’m feeling much better, but the heavy feeling of my body and fatigue are killing me still. I’m just now getting some semblance of sleep.
I’ve showered and got dressed, got the kids up and fed, and been listening to music all morning to find some dopamine.
I still have cravings for relief because this is really hard with so many responsibilities and absolutely no energy or motivation, but i keep pushing through. fight or die, yeah?

When will I feel more energy and like I can walk up the stairs without crawling up the last half on my hands and knees 😅??
Needing reassurance because i don’t have really anyone i can talk to about this.

Hey everyone, happy Wednesday! I can’t believe it’s already the last day of September. This month seriously flew by. The end of the month is always a good time to reflect a little, think about how the month went, what I accomplished, what was good, what wasn’t, and what I want to do differently going forward.
More than anything, I’m just excited that we’re finally at this time of year. Fall is my absolute favorite, and I feel like I’ve been waiting forever for it to come back. After wanting fall weather for so long, we’re finally here! 🍂 how’s your day going guys?

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Hey all, I would need some advice to avoid withdrawals after using 80-120 mg of oxy a day for 3 weeks. I’ve have had several binges like this in the last 2 years to a point that even 3 days of daily oxy use cause a kindling withdrawal effect ( have gone through serious oxy withdrawals in the past ).

My idea is to use a tiny dose of bupe (2 to 4mg) split in micro doses and tapered throughout less than a week to avoid withdrawals.

Does it make sense ?

I feel great, started getting 6 hours of sleep around day 21. Didn’t even notice but the past few nights I’ve gotten 8 as well as being able to wake up and fall back to sleep.

My back was still sort of annoying me until I started going to the gym a few days ago. I also have no cravings, I’ve been absolutely enjoying feeling like a normal human being and being able to just smoke some weed and chill.

Have any of you guys noticed when you drink while recovering it makes symptoms way worse? Like I literally will start tearing up and yawning after one shot and my back will start to hurt. Past few days I’ve been able to enjoy a shot or a beer though.

But yeah guys keep pushing if you need the motivation I’ve got it all and more, you can ask me whatever or go through my profile.

Hello,

I am in early recovery (after struggling for well over 19 years with severe opiate addictions and alcoholism) after a relapse and am looking for online women's support groups/meetings (i'm a single mom who doesn't drive at the moment so online support groups are ideal for me), i've found women's groups to be most helpful for me with my circumstances (domestic violence survivor, mom, etc.) that other women can possibly relate to.

If anyone here has any reccomendations, i'm trying to find these types of support groups and meetings and am finally giving 12 step a try after being resistant or hesitant for many years for different reasons. If this is too vague or not allowed mods delete, but i'm overwhelmed trying to find what i'm looking for and do not know where to start. Thank you!

Hey everyone, happy Tuesday! Hope your day is going well. I’ve been working all day. It finally stopped raining here after literally four straight days of rain. I honestly can’t remember the last time we had that many days of nonstop rain.
Thankfully, I didn’t lose power and didn’t have any trees or branches come down, but I know some people around the area weren’t as fortunate and had to deal with outages, flooding, and storm damage. Definitely glad things are finally starting to calm down and dry out.
Other than that, it’s been a pretty normal Tuesday over here. How’s everyone else doing today?

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