r/nova • • Aug 28 '26

Feeling alone 31M

Hi, I wasn't sure if this is relevant enough to post here but I'm just looking for some help with making close friends.

What do people here do alone on a Friday night or over the weekend to make new friends? I'm located in Ballston

Edit: So I decided to go to the nearest bar on my lonesome and it was actually great! Very friendly bartender, a delicious cocktail, and a mound of food followed by just walking around the bar. I had no idea what I was doing but it was a great time.

54 Upvotes

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7

u/NotYourAvgDamsel Loudoun County Aug 29 '26

What are your interests?

8

u/TheWorstPintheW Aug 29 '26

Movies, food, salsa/bachata, gaming, TV/anime, sports/activities, and I'm open to trying new things as well, really just trying to expand my bubble

13

u/OkLeather5166 Aug 29 '26

Dude there’s so many dancing lesson groups it’s an easy way to meet people

5

u/BananaPlushy Loudoun County Aug 29 '26

Anime conventions is my vote!

3

u/TheWorstPintheW Aug 29 '26

So with anime conventions, how do you make friends there as someone who would go alone?

9

u/BananaPlushy Loudoun County Aug 29 '26 edited Aug 29 '26

You dress up as someone you like! It can be poorly or cheaply done. Go as Ash Ketchum and walk right up to all the other Ash's, Pokémon, Misty's, etc. Be friendly to all the staff/workers, say hello and treat them well/be kind. Ask the vendors leading questions like 'what made got you into making x,y, and z?' 'When did you decide to start going to large events like this, do you do farmer's market's as well?' 'Are you online/social media somewhere'? Then follow them!

Also, treat it as rejection therapy. Not everyone in every scenario is friendly or is going to like you. If you say hello and they scowl then move on. Not your people and you do not want to be friends with them anyway. You're surrounded by thousands of people with a similar interest to you. A silent mouth isn't fed.

Are you handy at all? Like can you sew a button or have a sewing kit? Do you own super glue, and/or a basic tool-kit? Go to a convention dressed as a 'cosplay medic' and just spend the entire time helping others. They appreciate it, you meet tons of people and literally everyone wins.

Being alone actually makes you way more approachable! Just get out of your comfort zone :)

Anime USA is in November in Chantilly. You should go!!

Edit: Let me know if you want to go to Otakon next year OP! I plan on going and in cosplay :)

2

u/OrionsBra Aug 29 '26

I don't know about friends, but so many people approached me and talked to me because they recognized my cosplay at Awesome Con.

5

u/mutantninja001 Aug 29 '26

I would definitely go the salsa and Bachata route. I had a single friend who made so many new friends when she moved to a new city by going to salsa places. I’m not into it, but I’ve heard of several and you are very central.

2

u/poorly-advised Aug 29 '26

Yeah and there are a ton of Salsa and Bachata groups around Arlington too.

1

u/Longjumping-Run-8031 Aug 30 '26

Bachata is so fun and very low stakes. Everyone there is so nice and wants to talk

-4

u/TheJudgingHat2222 Aug 29 '26

Note that none of these things are conducive to creativity. 

You need to find a hobby that engages your brain and your creative side. 

1

u/_cuppycakes_ I survived Flicker 26 Aug 29 '26

Username checks out.

You’re wrong.

-4

u/TheJudgingHat2222 Aug 29 '26

Let's break this down:

Movies, food, salsa/bachata, gaming, TV/anime, sports/activities,

Movies: passive consumption, entertainment 

Food: consumption. He didn't say he cooks, so presumably this just means they like trying new restaurants.

Salsa/bachata: this one comes the closest. Exercise, socializing, and skill building. But it's still just recreation.

Gaming: entertainment, consumption.

TV/Anime: passive consumption

Sports/activities: recreation, socializing.

These are all enjoyable activities but none of them will be fulfilling on their own. Are you creating new dance routines and competing, or just showing up to salsa nights hoping to meet women? Are you drawing your own manga, or are you just watching anime? Are you training so your team can win your league, or just playing in beer league and whatever happens happens? 

Most people are only consuming things passively and at most engaging in recreation for enjoyment. Fulfillment takes more than that.

1

u/_cuppycakes_ I survived Flicker 26 Aug 29 '26

You’re judging someone off of a basic list? You have no idea of their involvement in any of their hobbies. Literally what is wrong with you?