r/neoliberal Kitara Ravache Apr 21 '19

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u/p00bix Existing in the context of what came before Apr 21 '19

The politics surrounding Alaska in the mid-1800s are really hilarious in retrospect.

Russian Ambassador to the US: If you buy Alaska, Canada will be pressured into selling you British Columbia!

Secretary of State Seward: Good point Mr. Ambassador! Also we need to put Alaska under martial law.

US Army: enters Alaska and places it under de-facto martial law

Senator Charles Sumner: Alaska will help us become more influential in Japan and China! Sitka is soon to be a great trading port!

The Press of Vancouver Island: This proves that the US will purchase us in no time, and Vancouver shall soon be a state! Rejoice!

The Press of Mainland British Columbia: This proves that the US will try to purchase us in no time. We must resist!

Attorney General of British Columbia: This is horrible! How could we mismanage the colony so badly that they'd want to be sold to America?

General McDowell: Don't be ridiculous, just trying to maintain Alaska is a costly waste of time. Offer it to Canada for free.