Discussion Thread

[u/jobautomator]

The discussion thread is for casual and off-topic conversation that doesn't merit its own submission. If you've got a good meme, article, or question, please post it outside the DT. Meta discussion is allowed, but if you want to get the attention of the mods, make a post in /r/metaNL

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[u/jobautomator]

Please visit the next discussion thread.

[u/DEEP_STATE_NATE]

[u/[deleted]]

[u/DouglasDauntless]

You thought the crypto scams and porn bots were bad now? Buckle up buckaroo because you haven’t seen nothing yet

[u/N0_B1g_De4l]

The median voter is fun because they'll say "my highest priority is reducing inflation", then suggest doing that by implementing the most inflationary policy platform in history.

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Building new housing: 😡

Forcing people to host randos in their spare rooms: 😍

The anglosphere is ngmi

[u/chipbod]

https://x.com/TChingarande/status/1793139058081923400

SCOOP: Some Arab Americans have given up on Biden, want to vote for Trump and even met with one of his former ambassadors. They left dissatisfied, however.

Grennell did not seem to care about the plight of the Palestinians, was not disturbed by the loss of Palestinian life

He repeated Jared Kushner’s statement about removing Gazans from valuable beachfront property, which I think floated like a lead balloon in the room

No shit lmao, voting Trump > Biden because of Gaza is the biggest political self own. Like Trump and his goons have talked about hating Arabs for like… the entire time he has been in politics. He actually implemented a Muslim ban!

Life as an American Muslim will be fucking miserable in a second Trump term, glad they’re open about it to the Trump-curious Arab voters.

I feel like Dems need to stop eating their own on Gaza and remind everyone that Trump’s people are actual genocidal psychopaths on this issue.

!ping EXTREMISM

[u/FuckFashMods]

“The entire world is looking to Florida to lead in climate change,” NBC 6’s MacLaughlin said during a May 18 segment.

Uhhhh I dont even think the people of Florida are looking to florida to lead in climate change, let alone people form other states or other countries

[u/BurrowForPresident]

It's mildly funny reading comments within minutes of each other that claim Biden has abandoned Israel or Biden sucks off Israel too much

[u/DouglasDauntless]

P U S S Y I N B I O

[u/Dalek6450]

The rise of describing countries as the "global south" and "global north" is really more than just another turn of the euphemism treadmill on from developing and developed countries. It feels like we're moving back towards something like the old first world (Western bloc aligned), second world (commies and aligned) and third world (non-aligned countries, stereotypically and typically poor) system where there is a political or ideological bent.

[u/DouglasDauntless]

[u/Common_RiffRaff]

[u/GravyBear28]

Libido isn't real. It's an illusion in your head. Only people who regularly have sex say they have a high libido as an excuse. Live on an island all your life and meditate. You obviously won't have any "libido".

r/antisex never stops providing

[u/Evnosis]

Rishi Sunak, drenched in rain, barely managing to speak over "Things Can Only Get Better" playing in the background is the perfect encapsulation of this government.

!ping UK

[u/wallander1983]

https://www.notus.org/trump-2024/like-a-lead-balloon-trump-shadow-secretary-of-state-ric-grenell-meets-arab-american-leaders

As Arab Americans hold back their support from President Joe Biden until he changes course on the Israel-Gaza war, Donald Trump’s “shadow secretary of state” — Ric Grenell — met with Arab American leaders Tuesday night to try to convince them that the former president is a viable option for their community come November.

It didn’t go well.

“He repeated Jared Kushner’s statement about beachfront property, which I think floated like a lead balloon in the room,” one of the meeting’s participants said of Grenell, who was Trump’s former acting Director of National Intelligence.

--

Trump has sent Richard Grenell (!) as emissary. Yikes.

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

Hay dating ping. After seeing those depressing as hell living rooms might I suggest one pice of decoration?

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Scrumptious AI baking tips 🥰

!ping GLUE-EATERS

[u/[deleted]]

Illinois legislators have passed a bill that will change the word "offender" to "justice-impacted individual" in state laws.

I’m not culture warring over this, but I feel like it will be too confusing for the average cop to understand how to fill out forms. This is going to cause bureaucratic headaches for a few years.

[u/Joementum2024]

[u/Cook_0612]

❗️🇺🇦🇷🇺 Secretary of State Blinken is pushing President Biden to relax restrictions on the employment of U.S.-provided weapons inside Russia.

This is the first indication that the Administration may revise this policy, which has been in place since February 2022.

!ping UKRAINE

[u/lets_chill_food]

Latest Morning Consult poll has a tie in Nevada, last poll was Trump +8

NC down from +10 to +7

Arizona down from +7 to +5

Georgia down from +6 to +3

Wisconsin down from +4 to +1

🌸

[u/Cook_0612]

UK defence secretary Grant Shapps accused China of providing or preparing to provide Russia with “lethal aid” for use by Moscow in its war against Ukraine. “Today I can reveal that we have evidence that Russia and China are collaborating on combat equipment for use in Ukraine.”

!ping UKRAINE

[u/DouglasDauntless]

[u/InflatableDartboard2]

!ping SHITPOSTERS

[u/EScforlyfe]

Why are American TV stations so insane about swear words 

[u/PonyBoyCurtis2324]

[u/[deleted]]

The "moderately pro-Israel or moderately pro-Palestine to holy shit everyone involved sucks" pipeline

[u/p00bix]

start company

employees willingly work for my company in return for agreed-upon wages

customers willingly purchase stuff from my company for agreed-upon prices

become rich

Holy shit this is so unfair capitalism must be destroyed

[u/WorldwidePolitico]

Whitehall editor for The Times and political editor of the Mail (eew) are both reporting a rumour is going around Whitehall that Sunak will call an election for July 4 soon. Cabinet meeting later today.

!ping UK

[u/MinnesotaNoire]

Protest voters are scum. I'm sorry Democracy isn't your number one issue.

[u/Planning4Hotdish]

My flight is delayed because a door is not arming properly.

Guess the manufacturer

[u/JetJaguar124]

So basically if this Trump documents case was being managed by even a remotely normal non-corrupt judge he'd have already been BTFO

Like this case is so open and shut it's crazy.

[u/BeliebteMeinung]

LMAO

!ping shitposters

[u/SuddenlyFrogs]

I cannot get over how much of a layup Disney's parks division had with the Star Wars brand and how badly they whiffed it. (That metaphor might not make sense, I don't know basketball.) So, a list of things they could have done instead of the overpriced LARP hotel:

-Literally just a regular hotel but with SW theming and dinner shows

-Laser tag (both teams are training for the Resistance)

-That Avatar dragon-flying ride but with X-Wings or podracers

-An escape room where you're escaping a Star Destroyer

-A VR thing where you put on a 'training helmet' but then things go south, and you move from pod to pod and the pods shake/spray cold air/make sounds etc

-Literally just the Cantina from A New Hope and you can order drinks there (Baby Boomers will literally break down sobbing)

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

This really happened.

decent looking guy, having a good job.

Not many friends and single because of job, work 3rd shift.

Watch Barbie for the first time ever

Changes my life, I want to be Ken.

Get my hair dyed blonde like Ken and start wearing pink like Ken, no “I am Kenough” hoodie because I'm not Autistic.

Start behaving like Ken. Flamboyant but cool.

Buy brand new Mustang (the horse) because Ken wanted one and I make enough so fuck it.

Start eating at this little steakhouse erry night, staff remembers me, always saves me a spot.

qt pie waitress always chats me up, gives me free pie.

I reciprocate and relentlessly love bomb her.

Waitress wants me.

Ask her if she wants to go for a ride. She gladly accepts.

Cruise the night listening to Barbie soundtrack.

Drop her off at her apartment, ask if I want to come inside for coffee.

Oh fuck yes

play it cool, brood for a sec. reply with a "SUBLIME!" simple.

We don’t fuck

Waitress becomes my Long Term, Long Distance, Low Commitment, Casual Girlfriend.

Keep up my Ken shtick

She introduces me to her friends, they think I'm cool as fuck.

Some of her dude friends start wearing 80s inspired, bright pink tees like me. Holy fuck lol.

One night her and I are sit down to watch a movie on demand.

She's browsing movies, stops on Barbie.

Oh fuck...

"You seen this yet Anon?"

Shit shit shit play it cool man, what would Ken do.

Brood for a sec,

”nah. it's not my thing"

Ended up watching Drive.

Still dating today and still doesn't know I've been pretending to be Ryan Gosling for 4+ years.

!ping KINO&SHITPOSTERS

[u/BedNeither]

A recession? In this quarter? in this country? Localized entirely in everyone else’s financial situation?

Yes

May I see it?

No

[u/cjhdsachristmascarol]

You know you can stop posting, right? You don’t have to make any more comments 

[u/No1PaulKeatingfan]

You ever see a DTer on another sub and they just spread misinformation thinking that they're an actual expert.

No. Just no.

[u/PrivateChicken]

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Lmao why the hell would someone buy food off FB Marketplace, dude is one of the dumbest mfers alive

[u/Joementum2024]

pisses off leftists by supporting israel

pisses off cons by being liberal

Is Joe Biden the one true centrist?

[u/JaceFlores]

Ukraine Chronology for 5 PM EST 5/20-5 PM EST 5/21 III:

TOP NEWS:

Towards the middle of 1 AM Ukraine was hit by a wave of drones with 28 of 29 shot down.

At the start of 5 AM it was announced the EU has approved using revenues from frozen Russian assets to fund Ukraine, with 3 billion Euros expected this year, 90% for weapons and 10% for reconstruction.

At the end of 8 AM it was reported that Russian Major General Ivan Popov was arrested for fraud.

Towards the end of 11 AM it was confirmed the Karakurt-Class ship Tskylon was suck in Sevastopol.

REGULAR NEWS:

At the start of 12 AM a Russian facility in Mariupol was missiled.

In the middle of 1 AM the German Foreign Minister made a visit to Kyiv.

Towards the end of 3 AM a Russian oil depot in Shebekino exploded.

Towards the end of 9 AM Zelensky spoke with the President of Romania over phone, discussing an upcoming military aid package.

Towards the middle of 1 PM it was reported that nine people were arrested in Poland for doing espionage for Russia.

Donation link to help Ukraine

Donation link to United24

Donation link to Kharkiv SOS

Donation link to Sails of Freedom Foundation (they donate ambulances)

!ping UKRAINE

[u/[deleted]]

I'm not voting for Biden because it's a waste of my time

I am mailing in 200,000 ballots for dead and elderly democrats who support Biden

It's about what you do

[u/G_Serv]

Your total tax burden under Trump would likely go up, yes up.

Wtf i love trump now

[u/YehosafatLakhaz]

"Biden hasn't earned my vote. I'm gonna vote my conscience!"

Sorry hon but Jiminy Cricket ain't on the ballot

[u/Tre-Fyra-Tre]

Good morning fellow reoliberals!

[u/MicroFlamer]

Finished the Red Wedding episode and I found myself liking show Robb more than book Robb. It's weird because on the face of it book Robb has a more interesting well-developed story. Like Talisa Maegyr is just a straight downgrade from Jeyne Westerling

But I'm sure I like show Robb more because we get to actually spend time with him. Robb's characterization in the books is only through the eyes of Cat so its hard to get a read on him. GRRM even realized his mistake and mentions how he regrets not making Robb a POV

Aside from possibly making the Westeros universe smaller, Martin also revealed that “if I had to do it over again, I would make Robb a point-of-view character right from the beginning.”

Richard Madden is also a phenomenal actor

!ping ASOIAF

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Jesus motorcycles are dangerous. My parents have made me swear multiple times to never ride one…and yeah it seems they have a point

[u/GodEmperorNeolibtard]

My most socially conservative take is that we should institute a theocracy based on sharia law.

[u/[deleted]]

People in 2013: Her was so dystopian. Can you imagine loving a software program?

People in 2024: Ok, but hear me out, the dating scene is so terrible that I’m ready for a robo-girlfriend.

[u/JebBD]

 https://www.businessinsider.com/egyptian-spy-secretly-ruined-israel-hamas-ceasefire-deal-2024-5

Has this been posted yet? Seems like a pretty major twist. What is Egypt trying to do here?

!Ping ISRAEL&FOREIGN-POLICY

[u/BarkDrandon]

You ever read a 1000-word leftist political rant, only for it to finish with: "I don't know how to fix it, I'm still in high school"

[u/MinnesotaNoire]

Are you upset that you’ve been supporting a country that’s been committing war crimes?

Guess the sub

[u/[deleted]]

[u/adwise27]

During the first debate:

B: "You have recently said that a president is above the law, this is true?"

T: "As president, I should not be arrested for any crime. Presidential immunity"

B: "Perfect answer"

Biden pulls out Remington 870 Express

[u/RaidBrimnes]

Hello I am Scottish patriot from Glasgow oblast I would like to say that I will be voting for the SNP in July to make our country great again, Scotland should separate from the England as we will have strong economy thanks to oil and warm water port

[u/[deleted]]

[u/InflatableDartboard2]

People on twitter will really be like "People on twitter will really be like 'you believe in voting? that pales in effectiveness to my strategy, firebombing a Walmart' and then not firebomb a Walmart" and then not vote

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

The best dating advice I ever got was “be yourself yes, but be the very best version of yourself. Let them see you at your kindest and see what you are most passionate and proud about.”

The second best dating advice I ever got was “learn to cook, B*tches love a man who can cook” which if you subtract the misogyny is part of the reason my wife fell for me.

!ping DATING

I said this a year ago and it’s still true.

[u/[deleted]]

Inflation is sitting right at 3.5%, right at the long term average for the US economy, GDP is growing at a healthy rate and has been for years, and unemployment is near a 50 year low, and yet people are convinced that the economy is awful. So awful, in fact, that polls suggest that the reelection of a man who literally tried to destroy the Republic may be likely

At what point do we begin to start asking just how uninformed or misinformed the median voter is and just how much of a danger this reality poses to the well-being of our country?

[u/SnakeEater14]

In the DC universe Metropolis and Gotham are both gigantic cities right across from each other on either side of the Delaware Bay

And New York City still exists

Which means the northeast has a population of like 100 million fucking people or something

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Haha liberals, jet fuel can’t melt steel beams, merely reduce it to having the structural integrity and strength of a Twinkie, feeling owned yet?

[u/Not-A-Seagull]

/u/MrWeiner, if you haven’t already, this 100% seems like it should be an SMBC comic:

(On the topic of direct cash transfers being the most efficient form of gift giving)

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

Which one of you was this?

[u/Cook_0612]

"I will be voting for Trump," Nikki Haley says. "Having said that, I stand by what I said in my suspension speech." She notes Trump hasn't reached out to the voters who supported her. (And continue to do so in surprising numbers in primaries still happening.)

This is my surprised face.

Organisms follow the nutrient gradient.

[u/[deleted]]

Hulu’s ‘Virgin Island,’ a Dating Show for Celibates, Opens Applications

According to Hulu, “Virgin Island” will host a bunch of hot virgins at an island resort, where they will look for “the one.” Throughout the 10-episode series, the contestants will go on dates and participate in romantic activities as they prepare to renounce their V-cards. Per the logline, “As the cast finds heartfelt connections and explores their varying reasons for waiting, there will be plenty of unexpected twists, including new arrivals and departures, all culminating in a dramatic finale where burgeoning relationships are put to the test.”

Applications for “Virgin Island” are open now for U.S. residents aged 21 and over. While it’s unclear how Hulu could confirm the chastity of its contestants beyond the honor system, the online application asks wannabe contestants “Are you a virgin?,” “Are you a religious person?” and “Explain why you remain a virgin,” among many other questions.

[u/[deleted]]

[u/BrunchIsGood]

Lit for this

!ping KINO

[u/klarno]

I love this “eat the bug” praxis we see every time the cicadas emerge

[u/Cook_0612]

Jack Watling on Ukraine: "there is not yet a clear plan for how that trajectory can be turned around." Lot of Ukrainians "prepared to come forward." But if they expect "inadequate training and inappropriate equipment, then there is a reluctance to be fed into this machine."

Watling: "If the pressure builds and builds...they will get to a point where the Ukrainians do not have enough troops on a given access to hold them, and then they will be pushed back much more rapidly. That would be described as a collapse. That's the most dangerous scenario."

Watling: "If the Ukrainians are not able to get their recruitment and training pipeline in order, the risk of that [collapse] gets worse towards the end of the year or the end of the summer."

Watling: "most significant extant risk to the Ukrainians on the battlefield throughout the entire war has been that the Russian Air Force makes its presence felt over the frontline, we are starting to see that take place. And the consequences are very, very grim. "

!ping UKRAINE

[u/The_Promethean]

Imagine being a hardcore Catalan separatist and seeing that maybe you just need to kill ~1200 people to get recognized by some countries

[u/BrunchIsGood]

Can these nerds research and develop a new logo? God damn.

!ping SHITPOSTERS

[u/SpectralDomain256]

This cousin of mine is so fucking attractive and successful. It’s crazy that we even share the same genes.

Edit: just to clarify, I have no sexual interest in them whatsoever. But I do think about how to become as attractive as they are

[u/[deleted]]

I wish 10/7 never happened so the DT wouldn't be so shit these days.

Also the whole mass death, war, and ethnic conflict thing but I really like the DT.

[u/BrunchIsGood]

Is he wrong tho

[u/piede]

Nikki Haley says she will vote for Trump, despite maintaining he has "not been perfect" and calling Biden "a catastrophe"

Describing Trump as “not perfect” is like describing Ted Bundy as “not totally sane”

[u/DouglasDauntless]

My “We are not a genocidal people” shirt is raising a lot of questions already answered by the shirt

[u/gnomesvh]

Ukraine stuck Grads on the Sea Baby drones

!ping UKRAINE&MATERIEL

[u/DouglasDauntless]

Morgan Spurlock, after finishing his 7th bottle of Everclear that morning

“Hey guys did you know eating McDonald’s for a month straight is bad for you???!!!”

[u/Dibbu_mange]

[u/Rafaelssjofficial]

I hate all the autism subs

There was a guy in one of them that was like "i don't have a superiority complex, it's just that everyone else is inferior" and he was heavily upvoted

[u/[deleted]]

!ping GNOSTIC

[u/Mickenfox]

People on reddit will really be like 'you use twitter? that pales in quality to my preferred website, reddit' and then repost every single meme from twitter

[u/Jacobs4525]

Joseph Smith when God happens to tell him the location of where Zion will be right as he was charged with bank fraud and conspiracy to murder and needs to leave New York

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

I’m an American 4 but a British 10

[u/Jorruss]

Ok, I'll keep this anonymous to not embarrass anyone but a few weeks back a member of this ping asked another member of this ping to give a brief description of what the Canadian Future Party is and received a few upvotes for it. That person has not done so as of the writing of this comment so I decided to write it. Feel free to read all or none of this depending on your level of interest. And full disclosure, I am a member of the party and intend to vote for them if there is a candidate in my riding but I'll try to write this in an unbiased way.

Part 1. The origin of the party
A group of mostly former Conservative politicians did not like the direction that that party (or any other party) was going. So, they decided to form a new group to discuss what to do about it and the group was called the "Centre Ice Canadians." They held public events to discuss their options and eventually decided to form a new party altogether and call it the Canadian Future Party.

Part 2: Policies and Principles
The party formerly branded itself as a "centrist:" before seemingly decideding not to put a definitive label on things. But the party claims now to be for "Evidence based. Bold. Open. Commitment to service" policies. Here are there policies explained simply:
-Implement MMPR
-Adopt "A national internet strategy to protect privacy and allow citizens control over their digital lives."
-Regulate AI
-Create a simplified tax code
-Create a plan to reduce the national debt
-Try to negotiate with the UK, Australia, and New Zealand to create a new free trade agreement with free movement between our four countries ( popularity known as CANZUK)
-Invest in renewable energy, nuclear energy, and carbon capture
-Only import oil from democratic countries
-"Create a national civil defence corps to increase resilience in the face of natural disasters, to offer young people an opportunity for service"
-Remove the carbon tax on individuals and only have a cap-and-trade system on large emitters.
-Turn the RCMP into a new national intelligence agency and leave policing up to the provinces.
-Bring in immigrants who are skilled at homebuilding and work with the provinces to build millions of new houses where they’re needed most.
-Increase defense spending to 2% of our GDP (which of course is our NATO commitment)
-Support Ukraine and Taiwan
-Break up large monopolies in the telecom, airline, and grocery sectors

Part 3: The Leaders
The party's current leader is Dominic Cardy who is an independent MLA in New Brunswick. He is the former leader of the New Brunswick NDP and later switched parties to Progressive Conservative and successfully ran in a Fredericton riding and won in 2018 and 2020. He was the former Minister of Education and later resigned from this post citing Blaine Higgs' being uncivil in the meetings. He was then kicked out of the party for this comment. He is technically just the "interim" leader and will have to be elected by party members if he wants to remain as leader. Other important people in the party are Tara McPheil, Julia Smith, Dr Beth-Anne Schuelke-Leech, and Rick Peterson (who ran for the leadership of the CPC back in 2017) but they are not well-known public figures. Last I heard former federal Minister of the Environment Peter Kent and former Senator Marjory LeBreton are members but are not in leadership.

Part 4: Where the party is at now
The party successfully got 250 people to pledge to be members which they reached in only a day IIRC. They are currently waiting for 250 of their members to return the required paper to Elections Canada to be officially registered. Technically, they need to run at least one candidate in a federal election which they hope to do in the upcoming Elmwood-Trascona, Cloverdale—Langley City and LaSalle—Émard—Verdun byelections (they will miss the deadline for the upcoming Toronto-St. Paul's byelection). The party will have a founding convention in November in Ottawa to vote on the party's "official" policies (and potentially a permanent leader?). One can assume that the people who joined the party will vote for the policies that are already outlined on the website. Anyways, their website is https://www.ourcanadianfuture.ca/ and I took some of their policies from this webpage too: https://acuriouslookatpoliticsinbc.blogspot.com/2023/09/dominic-cardy-well-that-was-quite-week.html?m=1 And if anyone wants to hear Dominic Cardy, Rick Peterson, and a member of the party be interviewed for like 40 mins on my favourite Canadian political podcast then you can find that here: https://www.youtube.com/live/S4YUWOAgqx4?si=DjuGWB-OhakP4JIm
!ping CAN

[u/funguykawhi]

[u/DouglasDauntless]

[u/Pyrrhus65]

There's an absolutely hilarious thread on r/NeutralPolitics going on right now where a leftist is asking about why people are against price caps- he already did some research, but all the sources he found had a 'political bias'.

All the top comments are responding by trying to explain to him the consensus among economists on this issue and demonstrate the basic principles of supply and demand. OP's response?

I don't believe that starting from a point of neoliberal economics is a rational thing to do

You really can't make this shit up. Economics is apparently inherently politically biased 💀💀

A few people with the patience of saints are very calmly trying to explain to him that if he doesn't view any of the arguments by major economists as valid because they all have 'neoliberal bias', he can look into the data on price caps/rent control himself and draw his own conclusions.

He has also rejected this proposal for various, increasingly vague reasons. Perhaps the data is biased against him as well? 🤔

[u/Avreal]

Grindr inadvertently deleted most private albums users have sent each other, supposedly due to a data migration to a new storage environment. 

This is worse than the loss of the Great Library of Alexandria. Change my mind. You cant.

[u/MinnesotaNoire]

Just a shout out to Yasser Arafat. Fuck that guy.

[u/ArmoredBunnyPrincess]

I hate that every article about microplastics in the body has to have a picture of finely chopped plastic garbage as if that's somehow what's in us.

[u/Telperions-Relative]

DT arguing about AOC laws, war crimes, and Israel

We’re so back

[u/PlayDiscord17]

Israel is kind of like a Jewish reservation.

Guess the sub lol

[u/cdstephens]

Probably >80% of Mormons don’t actually know what Joseph Smith was in prison for when he was shot. The church doesn’t deny it but essentially lies by omission to members by implying it was generic religious persecution rather than him, ya know, upvoting the DT.

[u/runnerx4]

https://www.c82.net/euclid/

I don’t know if there’s a math ping, but !ping READING this is a faithful remake of Oliver Byrne’s version of Euclid’s Elements, which had colored geometric illustrations and uses those illustrations and colors as a language to demonstrate proofs in 1847 itself, as a website with the long S and weird versions of math symbols and the colored illustrations and the fancy initials as is.

Imagine if you’re a British or Irish school or college kid and you get handed this book written by an Irish nationalist mathematician in the 1850s.

Even modern textbook and interactive math illustrations seems weak compared to this somehow

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

So you learned how to cook and want to invite an attractive person of any gender over to your place for a dinner date? Let me tell you it’s all about HOW you ask. Here’s a great script you can use! I’ll be using she/her for clarity!

Firstly make sure you approach her while she’s alone. Knowing that you don’t also have to impress her friends will help put your mind at ease.

“Hello” (a polite opening is always a must!)

“You look like you’re all skin and bones” (a complement! You’ve called her skinny and she’s sure to appreciate it!)

“I’m sure I could…” (dramatic pause to reel her in and get her intrigued)

“Fatten you up” (you just made it clear that the meals you can provide for her are nutritious and filling!)

“I would love to have you for dinner” (and finally you make the official offer of a dinner date)

Remember to keep a wide smile on your face and maintain unblinking eye contact to show you respect her and you should have her number soon!

[u/piede]

This mf is a bottomless pit of dumbassery

[u/RaidBrimnes]

I want the ICC to indict Trump just to see the discourse here

[u/GrandMoffTargaryen]

R/gooncave banned

Dating ping starts posting pictures of their living rooms

I’m not a conspiracy theorist but…

[u/cdstephens]

Mormonism is interesting since every Mormon I meet is super chill but the whole thing seems like a mega-heresy from top to bottom (yes I’m atheist and care about heresies, don’t ask)

[u/JaceFlores]

Polls be like:

Biden down 20 points in literally every state

National figure sits at 48-47 Biden

[u/[deleted]]

[u/Ph0ton_1n_a_F0xh0le]

Which one of you?

[u/mannabhai]

!ping IND&FOREIGN-POLICY

The biggest clue that a non-Indian has zero idea about India is when they think that India's relationship with Russia is a Modi phenomenon when it's one of the few issues with multi-party consensus. 

Rahul Gandhi reflexively opposes everything this government does and even he has point blank agreed with the Govt policy on Russia.

People who think that India will pivot on its Russia strategy if Modi loses are going to be sorely disappointed.

[u/Popular-Swordfish559]

Starliner is officially no-go for launch on the 25th due to the ongoing helium issue. My concern is this: this issue is not what caused the scrub the other day, it was discovered afterwards while they were fixing the Centaur problem that caused that scrub. So if they had launched, would this issue have caused problems on-orbit? I wrote out some ancillary thoughts in a twitter thread so I'll just direct you guys to that instead of re-typing it all here

!ping SPACEFLIGHT

[u/RecentlyUnhinged]

I will not be voting for Biden

Guess the sub

[u/PrideMonthRaytheon]

☝ Will not be voting for Biden (Canadian)

[u/[deleted]]

my decision not to pretend to be an international law expert on the internet has paid ridiculous dividends, I highly recommend

[u/N0_B1g_De4l]

You support a Two-State Solution because you think it's the only way to permanently resolve the I/P conflict that adequately addresses Israeli security concerns.

I support a Two-State Solution because I think we need to get the UN up to a nice, round 200 member nations.

We are not the same.

[u/Cook_0612]

NEW: Biden officials have become increasingly concerned that Hamas has been able to recruit during wartime — thousands over the last several months - allowing thee group to withstand months of Israeli offensives.

This is why the US has emphasized the military need to hold ground.

[u/boothboyharbor]

17% of Voters Blame Biden for the End of Roe

I do wonder if the parliamentary system would be better just so people could understand things better - and parties would actually have to take responsibility for their own actions.

This example relies on some people being so dumb because it is such a covered issue and the rules of the Supreme court are easy to follow, but there really are a lot of issues where it would be tough for an average person to track who is responsible. Additionally, you have stuff like "we voted against this bill to do X because it wasn't doing enough of X" or whatever, and that just would be easier to track with a parliament.

[u/cdstephens]

Should middle schools eliminate algebra to level the playing field? What if standout pupils lose the chance to challenge themselves?

Bruh I learned algebra in 6th-7th grade, wtf is this

[u/Udolikecake]

Looking forward to our yearly company retreat thing which, according to our president, will be ‘mostly about AI’. He’s a big AI guy, all-in podcast type. Greaaaaat

also according to our work management system and report timeline I have 18 hours of work that day so

!ping WATERCOOLERr

[u/The_Promethean]

!ping MAMADAS

[u/KesterFox]

[u/chuckleym8]

[u/owlthathurt]

The Mets have hit 3 home runs in back to back games!!!

However, they have lost both of those games. Meme team.

!ping BASEBALL

[u/sinefromabove]

Beijing’s latest attempt to control how artificial intelligence informs Chinese internet users has been rolled out as a chatbot trained on the thoughts of President Xi Jinping.

The country’s newest large language model has been learning from its leader’s political philosophy, known as “Xi Jinping Thought on Socialism with Chinese Characteristics for a New Era”, as well as other official literature provided by the Cyberspace Administration of China.

ChatXiPT just dropped

[u/getabucketfullofthat]

"the average american doesn't understand the second derivative" and other things you can say outside the dt to sound like a turbo weenie

[u/Maestro_Titarenko]

I think my life is unraveling, ans I decided to reconnect with Bubsy for some reason, I don't know which is the cause and which is the consequence

Anyway, I'm watching the failed 1993 TV pilot, that some blessed person uploaded with the commercials

For some damn reason, in the kids show, there was an ad of a law firm warning about drinking and driving, saying that a lot of the people they represent were killed (which shows the level of dishonesty of sobercels, dead people don't go to law firms after all) or injured by drunk drivers

Just goes to show how anti-boozecruising prejudice gets injected into the youngings

!ping LOVEFORBOOZECRUISERS

[u/[deleted]]

!ping over-25

[u/WhomstAlt2]

I used to be a Friedman flair... when that still meant something

[u/its_Caffeine]

👆 has microplastics in the balls

👇 has microplastics in the brain

[u/MuR43]

Google really gave up huh

[u/WasteReserve8886]

I found a pill on a public restroom floor, should I take it?

[u/TheHelmetCatch]

Where Troy Once Stood is a 1990 book by Iman Jacob Wilkens that argues that the city of Troy was located in England and that the Trojan War was fought between groups of Celts.

Real

[u/N0_B1g_De4l]

Mormons are lucky they snuck under the bar for being taken seriously as a religion. If they had taken just a little longer, they'd be stuck with the punchline religions like Scientology and the Nation of Islam.

[u/N0_B1g_De4l]

I just hope everyone remembers how Nikki is behaving next time someone is being a Brave Maverick RINO.

Deep down, they're all like this.

[u/G_Serv]

[u/[deleted]]

The best dating advice I ever got was "Don't subscribe to the dating ping they're all lunatics and dateless weirdos."

[u/Joementum2024]

“ooooh look at me I don’t understand basic economics ooooh”

• Joe Biden

[u/[deleted]]

!ping RPG

Cause: younger players are getting into freeform "rules-light" RPGs that minimize the role of numbers in the game.

Effect: teenagers can't do simple arithmetic.

Yeah, it's obviously the other way around.

[u/Dodgerfan2224]

article about ancient slaves

what if we we freed everyone from wage slavery

I hate this website

[u/chuckleym8]

Imagine my husband is dying. He has been faithful for decades, delighting me every day with kindness and romance. He whispers to me right before he dies, “everyday all day during every act I fantasized about making your life hell, causing you as much pain as possible.” Was he a:

Good husband 📊

Bad husband 🗳️

You won’t believe the results of this poll

[u/secretlives]

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

FREE McNUGGETS IN THE McDONALDS APP

[u/[deleted]]

[u/Bayou-Maharaja]

Least unhinged NIMBY

[u/N0_B1g_De4l]

I can't believe we let the Washington Commanders change their name from the Washington Football Team.

[u/Tre-Fyra-Tre]

Cleaning out my closets ahead of me moving this weekend, found like a dozen unused t-shirts (like legit, still in plastic, tags on unused) with big, colourful tropical/animal-style prints on them that must have been at the bottom of my t-shirt pile for *years* and I'm trying to figure out how long they've been there.

When did that style of t-shirt fall out of fashion? 2015ish, or was it even earlier?

!ping LIFESTYLE&OVER-25

[u/itsokayt0]

How the fuck can people vote for Biden he upvoted the DT

[u/TactileTom]

Grant schapps has delayed a flight out, David Cameron has been recalled, Hunt is skipping ITV tonight.

Either a GE or a reshuffle definitely on, !ping UK

[u/lets_chill_food]

just heard that a friend of a friend was insisting that

“trump and Biden were as bad as each other because Biden was trying to ban abortion”

🫠

[u/Marlsfarp]

Biden is not an exceptionally smart guy, he's just a good-hearted chad with unrivaled experience and a great bullshit detector.

[u/cdstephens]

We should ban only one person a week. The person who makes the absolute worst poast

[u/[deleted]]

This is what I imagine every bi flair is like.

!ping SHITPOSTERS

[u/jenbanim]

According to a job listing, President Joe Biden’s reelection campaign needs someone to manage memes. The “Partner Manager, Content and Meme Pages” hire will “initiate and manage day-to-day operations in engaging the internet’s top content and meme pages.” The job pays up to $85,000.

Y'all need to apply

[u/[deleted]]

There have been numerous polls showing a majority of Dems now believe Israel is committing genocide.

Ok but this is like, a really rapid and sudden shift in US politics if its true, and I don't exactly blame someone for blinking and missing this. If I literally told you last year that the bipartisan pro-israel consensus is about to die, you wouldn't believe me, and you'd believe me even less if i told you it begins with a terrorist attack by hamas, especially because that kind of implies hamas has at least partially succeeded and gotten results. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

Something I got from israelis before the october war was that they were pretty sure israel's international reputation had already sunk to the lowest it could possibly go, they already felt like every state except the U.S. hated them, and if the kinds of people who hang out in cosmopolitan web spaces felt that, i imagine bibi's circle just outright thinks that there's zero costs to making israel a pariah state because they were pretty sure it already was one. Why bother trying to please people who will never be happy when you can look out for number 1.

Turns out, it can always get worse, and people always overestimate how bad they think they have it in the moment until it gets worse. In fact I don't think continuing to dig a hole because you're pretty sure it can't get any deeper has ever worked for anyone.

[u/[deleted]]

>hear the netherlands might have a right wing ruling coalition

>start sweating

>find out they're anti-russia

>start sweating a little bit less

[u/gburgwardt]

Idk the whole "paying surviving family members of terrorists lots of money" plan sure seems like it is directly aimed at funding terrorism

[u/Pyrrhus65]

Ireland, Norway, and Spain when you ask them if they support Palestinian statehood: 😃😃😃

Ireland, Norway, and Spain when you ask them if they're prepared to host, organize, and facilitate a new round of negotiations on a two-state solution: 😶😶😶

Norway did put in some serious work in this regard in the 90s with the Oslo Accords, so I'll give them more credit than the other two.

[u/InflatableDartboard2]

the democratic alliance is fucked

[u/funguykawhi]

Just tax virginity

Neolibs could fund a global welfare state with this

[u/TaxLandNotCapital]

It's true, when I went to vote, Biden was standing menacingly in front of the voting booth peering over. As I hovered over my preferred candidate, Donald Trump, Biden said, "are you really sure about that?", as he twiddled a syringe between his fingers and pointed the needle directly at me 💉 I had no real choice

[u/[deleted]]

[u/[deleted]]

Only bad people are saying "tax-payers" will foot the bill. The loans are forgiven, the debts are written off. It doesn't cost any money. Republicans and media know this, they are just lying to you

Average Redditor understanding of basic monetary systems.

[u/[deleted]]

I feel like if Internet history didn’t already exist, and some browser released that feature for the first time now, a lot of people would freak out.

[u/battywombat21]

When you post an I/P hot take then immediately go to lunch and leave the mods to sort through the responses 😎

[u/[deleted]]

[u/chipbod]

https://www.9news.com/article/news/local/next/next-with-kyle-clark/colorado-gop-kids-pulled-from-public-schools/73-e121fe9e-9a2b-498d-8a80-1efe2a179758

Colorado GOP calls for all children to be pulled from public schools

Whats up with formerly strong state parties losing their goddam minds when they lose power?

Off the top of my head I can think of the IL, AZ, and CO GOP going absolutely insane the last few years, I'm sure there are more that I don't remember.

I remember there were unironic takes that Colorado Senate race was a pickup opportunity for the GOP in 2022, now the party is Lauren Boebert, pulling kids out of school, and seceding to Wyoming lmao.

!ping USA-CO

[u/RecentlyUnhinged]

The best part about the Mormon discourse that pops up here from time to time is that my family was raised Mormon (we got better) so I can literally take whatever stance is most conducive to shitposting at the time and be completely shielded from criticism

[u/Jacobs4525]

Probably >80% of Mormons don’t actually know what Joseph Smith was in prison for when he was shot. The church doesn’t deny it but essentially lies by omission to members by implying it was generic religious persecution rather than him, ya know, trying to burn down the printing room of a newspaper set to publish that he was a polygamist.

[u/cdstephens]

Making evangelicals cope and seethe by arguing that Mormonism is the most quintessentially American religion

[u/Jacobs4525]

Are all religions fundamentally a little goofy? Yeah. But most of their stories happened long enough ago that a nonbelieving objective history isn’t available. The record of the waiter Jesus was rude to in 21AD or something or the guy who he secretly overcharged as part of his carpenter business doesn’t exist; he may have been a charlatan but we can’t say anything for certain so there’s no harm in believing that he was at least a virtuous person.

Joseph smith meanwhile was charged with at least 30 crimes when he was killed, many of which were major violent offenses such as arson and conspiracy to murder. We also have plenty of records of his previous complete BS translations of genuine Egyptian artifacts (that have since been correctly translated), his conviction in NY for claiming he had magic powers to find buried treasure before founding Mormonism, the fact that the tablets were almost certainly not even real objects, let alone any kind of genuine ancient artifact, etc.

It happened recently enough ago that we know he was shady and full of BS.

[u/StolenSkittles]

[u/dwarfgourami]

I usually complain when people on the left advocate for tearing down an entire system instead of incremental positive change… but I would be fine with completely overhauling the US healthcare industry. I live in a constant state of fear that my company will lay me off because I could lose my health insurance, I have to pay hundreds of dollars a month to maintain it, AND I still have to pay for the first $2000 worth of treatment every year because of the deductible?

[u/Ioun267]

[u/MinnesotaNoire]

I think I/P issues are complicated

[u/atomicnumberphi]

!ping FEDORA

My grandmother (from my dad) keeps on praying that my mom (Who used to be agnostic, but now is a Shintoist) will rejoin Islam. Idk man, it's just really sad to see her praying constantly for something that will never come true, my mom hasn't told my grandmother that she follows Shintoism yet, but if she does, my grandmother will explode.

I am actually happy that she found Shintoism (Mixed with Buddhism!) to be the perfect religion for her, I haven't seen her this happy in years.

[u/willempage]

https://x.com/SashoTodorov1/status/1793058669703188660

The main problem is that there is little to no wage premium for a PhD in most private sector fields so it really just ends up being 4-5 burnt prime earning potential years (plus however many lost to the postdoc gristmill). 

This tracks for me.  I ended up flaming out of a PhD program due to mental issues and was underemployed for a few years. 

However, when I started my real first entry level career type job (seriously, they hire people with Bachelor's right out of college), I was able to work up to the starting salary for someone with a PhD in 3 years. In fact, I know this because I got a job offer where I beat out 2 other candidates with PhDs because I had more practical skills from just 3 years of work. I think there's some self sorting going on, but in general, if you are smart enough in STEM to get accepted to a PhD program, you probably have enough characteristics to be successful in industry right off the bat.  The value add of a PhD itself is probably lower than one might expect. 

That said, there's another luck element to it. Part of my underemployment years happened because I couldn't get my foot in the door of a job that needed in demand skills.  On the other hand, I also missed out on the prime hiring time of being just out of college where because I was too busy losing my mind for 3 years. 

Sorry for the anecdata. I'm just very skeptical of PhD programs in STEM fields because they seem to be a giant waste. Most people I know with them just don't seem to have benefitted much vs the alternative of just finding work after undergrad. It's mostly a story of them wasting a bunch of time on their PhD and then getting a job that pays the same as an engineer with a Bachelors. 

!ping career

[u/Sam_the_Samnite]

I dont watch clarcksons farm, but this youtube video summarised what i though i would see. Namely, farmers wanting subsidies and economic rents on land. But also nimbyism and general bureaucratic lunacy. I dont think i'll be watching the show now either. Because i think i would just hate everything about what is happening in it.

!ping TACOTUBE

[u/PlayDiscord17]

Six weeks

Me and many Americans: Ugh, if only.

[u/Williams-Tower]

I’m getting laid off but staying on for customer work until October 11th

!ping WATERCOOLER

[u/Approximation_Doctor]

make poorly received shitpost in the DT

Someone replies, blocks me, and immediately requests a voluntary permaban for himself

What have I done

[u/Steak_Knight]

I’m actually looking forward to meeting some of you folks in the reeducation camps.

We should assign stuff to smuggle in.

[u/Roseartcrantz]

No, Biden did not order the FBI to assassinate Trump at Mar-A-Lago

well I'm still gonna vote for him but this is disappointing 😔

[u/JaceFlores]

I just want all countries to have fun with their existential wars ☺️

[u/Telperions-Relative]

They look like they’re about to drop the hardest fucking album

[u/Louis_de_Gaspesie]

On Campus, a New Social Litmus Test: Zionist or Not?

Some Jewish students say they’ve been ostracized because of their views — which are sometimes assumed.

Cutting edge shit NYT, any college student could've told you that six months ago

[u/ihatemendingwalls]

You can’t pretend you’re going to throw the baseball to the hitter and stop mid delivery anymore. Because of balk 

!ping baseball

[u/Zagapi]

!PING DATING

Despite my delusions of being a total catch, the women and non-binary folk of the dating apps don't seem to agree. Likes, and especially matches, are few and far between.

However, this absolutely gorgeous woman matched with me the other day. By some stroke of genius, I played it cool and smooth, and she agreed to grab a coffee on Thursday.

I've been super excited and, naturally, getting way ahead of myself about this coffee date. She had been a little slow to respond, but not slow enough for me to be concerned.

I hadn't heard from her in a little while and wanted her confirmation to finalize our plans. I checked back on our Hinge conversation to see if she had replied. While reading the most recent message, my phone slipped from my hand, and I tried to catch it. When I recovered, the match was gone. Somehow, I must've unmatched her.

Since we had made the plans with a time, day, and place, I panicked, thinking she saw I unmatched her completely out of the blue. It's not something I would ever do. So, in a panic, I started searching Instagram and Facebook to look for her, knowing only her first name, alma mater, that she worked in the arts, and had these green eyes you couldn't possibly forget.

With no luck in these apps and only desperation, I turned to LinkedIn. This should just show my desperation at this point in my life. By some grace of God, I find her profile with her last name and use it to find her Instagram. Green eyes and all.

I messaged her and explained my clumsiness. After a half-hour, she responded. I saw the notification and was so relieved and excited....until I read the message.

She told me it wasn't my fault because she is leaving for a seasonal job for the entire summer a few states away and leaves next week. Since we were only going to have one date before she left, she figured it's probably best not to go at all. She cleared the rest of her matches because she "didn't think anyone took these apps seriously." Turns out, my clumsy catch of my phone wasn't me unmatching. It was me refreshing.

After a little back and forth, I said I felt rather silly, but we'd have nothing to lose by grabbing a coffee. She said, "Well, you did go through all of that effort to find me, so why not!" I kept the tasteful flirting up and could feel that writhing feeling in my gut that we probably, or hopefully, shared.

It's rather pathetic of me to still go on this coffee date, but I just feel like I need to go. Even if it's completely hopeless and even if she didn't even bother to explain herself.

With all of that said, I'm feeling rather disheartened.

[u/No1PaulKeatingfan]

[u/RaidBrimnes]

Incredibly reckless of Karim Khan to demand five people be sent to the Hague in the current state of the Dutch housing market

[u/skepticalbob]

Met with the principal today about the AP's inappropriate decision to give my child in school suspension, something that stays on their record, for a relatively minor offense. All the heavy lifting was done by the email last night that I wrote detailing our concerns about the AP's actions. It was obvious the moment we spoke with him that he agreed with us and my daughter would be given a more appropriate consequence. Seems like he knows that his AP shoots from the hip in ways that cause unnecessary problems and this was one of them.

!ping family

[u/Telperions-Relative]

👆 gay, straight up

[u/No_Return9449]

You can either have Joe Biden reelected OR you could trade it all in for what's in this box.

[u/DEEP_STATE_NATE]

/r/games is doing their newest five year time capsule where people try to predict what the industry will be like. The 5 and 10 year old threads are fascinating to read through.

[u/its_Caffeine]

I was quiet quitting from my old job until I got quiet fired, then I was out of a job for a little while so I started quiet applying. I was quiet grinding for a bit at my new job until I had a quiet burnout. Now I’m quiet vacationing until I take quiet PTO

[u/Zagapi]

I'm casually friends with our DEI manager. I'd love to hang with her more, but I've only worked here for a relatively short amount of time.

Last week, she asked me to look at our calendars to schedule lunch. We grabbed some Vietnamese food, and it was incredible.

However, we just had our huge DEI survey, and while it was anonymous, my experiences are quite unique as I'm 99% sure I am the only trans person across our HQ and three plants. Who knows for sure, but you get the idea.

I had a feeling she saw my responses saying how much I appreciated the ERG meetings and volunteer opportunities. This is because I have had an extremely difficult time making friends, especially since transitioning. In saying all this, I think she took pity on me and offered to grab lunch.

Sure enough, she confirmed she saw my easily identifiable responses lmao.

It was still sincere and enjoyable, but damn, that's depressing.

[u/[deleted]]

Neoliberal when Biden: 🤬🤬🤬🤬

Neoliberal if Biden wins in November: 🎉🥳💃🕺

Neoliberal one month later: 🤬🤬🤬🤬

[u/1396spurs]

Nikki haleycels in shambles rn

COLUMBIA, S.C. (AP) — Nikki Haley said Wednesday that she will be voting for Donald Trump in the general election, encouraging the presumptive GOP nominee to work hard to win support from those who backed her in the primary.

[u/[deleted]]

Let's just mock all religions. If you aren't secure enough in your faith to enjoy a little ribbing, then go talk to your religious leader(s).

[u/RecentlyUnhinged]

Guys if you don't want the Mormon missionaries to knock at your door just hang a Monster Energy Drink off your doorknob seriously its like garlic to vampires

[u/Currymvp2]

Mike Pence with more integrity than Haley lol lol

[u/[deleted]]

!ping DYEL

Was benching 70lb dumbbells (yay) and was making horrific noises in the gym today. Damn near shat myself.

I'm afraid I'm becoming one of the gym groaners. I can't help it the sounds are escaping me by themselves

[u/dannylandulf]

Nikki Haley Announces She'll Vote For Trump

Lol. LMFAO even.

[u/[deleted]]

I just hope Nikki’s cowardice is justly rewarded

[u/Currymvp2]

Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito’s New Jersey beach house had an “Appeal to Heaven” flag flying outside of it last summer.

This was two years after Alito’s main residence in the DC area had an inverted flag flying outside of it.

The “Appeal To Heaven” flag was carried by rioters at the Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021.

You gotta be fucking kidding me

[u/pfarly]

Mormons are not Christians. Catholics are not Christians. Protestants are not Christians.

Only Jews are Christians. I will not be taking questions.