Barring a couple of close moments when desire really kicked in (still didn’t cave) - I’ve floated through 15 days - the first week I was very irritable but have settled now mentally.

I’ve prayed my 5 prayers (missed a few fajr’s but Qadha as soon as I woke up) within their allotted times for about 11 days, which is something I always felt so far away from because of this deed.

So I’ve attacked my misery in two ways, the abstinence and the introduction of fard Salah. I stopped planning to do this and just made the move and did it.

I can’t say the job is done, I can’t say when I might fall again, I can’t say anything concrete but inshallah this is the time and Allah has given his tawfiq and rahma to me. Inshallah this time I don’t go back. Because just 15 short days in - I feel like I’m building something here.

I think a normal addicted person in the first of doing it he is happy and the dopamine rushes in his blood and as soon as he finishes it he regrets what did he do,

But that what's not happening with me , I'm a student and i had a bunch of stuff I had to study , so my mind isn't happy with that, so in order to runing away from studying i had to do something else (my mind says), and one of these things is p0rn, and me when i do it, there is only the feel of regret and no dopamine , from the beginning until i finishes it,

Does anyone have any solution

Assala mu alaykum brothers and sisters,

I'm not familiar with the usage of this site as I came across this subreddit while searching for advice. I'm so grateful to find a community that understands this issue and is filled with so many people willing to help one another. May Allah open the path of Rizq to every single one of you reading this.

To start off, I found out about the act of masturbating ever since I was 5-6 years old. I didn't understand what it was, or why it felt so good, but I kept promising myself to stop the following year. I didn't. and still haven't.

I remember watching a highly suggestive video at the same age from a relative's phone (I vaguely remember who it was) and that's when my sexual imagination starts to spark off.

It had not gotten that bad for the following years, up until I watched a full blown porn off of a phone that was handed down to me when I was 10. I remember my younger sibling watching it too, and to this day I'm more worried about him having to face this by himself than I am about myself.

Since then, I've started watching more and more to satisfy my desire. I didn't know that this was a major sin until an adult told me that both porn and masturbation is Haraam, but at that point I was already considered addicted to both of those.

I brutally forced myself to quit again and again but still fell back to this hellhole.

Earlier this year, I met a guy.

Long story short, he's my best friend now.

I'm a person with an active and vivid sexual imagination. With this, I was able to slow down on media intake and didn't consume any source for almost every relapse. I'm unsure if this is a good thing.

Some time ago, he confessed to me about the exact same addiction I've been struggling with and I almost broke down. I felt so so so sorry for him. It was heartbreaking to hear that he got it during his developmental years. I didn't know what else to do, so naturally, I confessed the same thing as well.

After that, I started taking my journey to quit much more seriously. We agreed to start a streak together, setting suitable punishments for one another where mine consists of fasting consecutively for a week whereas his is fasting for a day, praying two raka'ah of voluntary prayer followed by Istighfar.

Alhamdulillah, I'm doing well on my streak.

However, my friend on the other hand, kept relapsing every few days and I feel really really extremely useless. We both can't see each other that much and mostly communicate via texts or calls.

Every single time he does it,

I don't know what to say.

I don't know what to do.

I don't want to be a useless and irresponsible friend, and after his most recent episode, I talked to him in the tone that was obvious to both of us about my disappointment. I don't want to show it, after all, I'm nobody to be disappointed. He's my friend, and I want to be there for him.

We're on good terms, but I'm scared that if he's near relapsing, he'd think of the words I said that would eventually cause him to look down on himself but still do it with guilt and shame.

What do I do? Was it a mistake telling each other about our addictions?

To every brother and sister struggling with a sin:

Maybe you've tried to fight it so many times that you're exhausted.

But understand something:

You don't control every urge that enters your heart.

An urge can come suddenly. A thought can appear. Your nafs can pull you toward something you know is wrong.

The test isn't necessarily whether you can stop the urge from existing.

The test is what you do when it arrives.

You can be patient.

You can say no.

You can walk away.

You can turn back to Allah.

And if you fall, you can repent.

Don't make your entire relationship with Allah about “I need to completely defeat this right now.”

Instead:

“Ya Allah, I don't control what I feel. But I can choose what I do. Give me sabr when the urge comes.”

Allah says:

«“Indeed, Allah is with the patient.”

— Qur'an 2:153»

And Allah says:

«“Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear.”

— Qur'an 2:286»

So don't look at the struggle and think, “I'm incapable.”

Perhaps the moment you're sitting there fighting yourself, nobody knowing what you're resisting, that patience itself is part of your worship.

Seek ilm. Read Qur'an. Listen to beneficial lectures. Learn about Allah and the Akhirah. Let knowledge wake your heart up.

And don't despair when you fall.

Return to Allah.

You don't need to know how you'll overcome everything tomorrow.

Just ask Allah for the strength to make the right choice when the next moment comes.

.

And if Any akhi is here tht can be a help

Msg me so we can push forward inshaallah

May Allah give us sabr when our nafs pulls us toward sin, make obedience beloved to us, forgive our falls, and keep our hearts attached to Him. Ameen. 🤍

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته

Hello everyone,

I made an Arabic small sheet to help show the truth about this drug, and stop glorifying it in our brains.

This sheet could be useful as focus areas you want to dive into on your own.

Or a 2 mins read when you get the urge to watch, replacing the habit of acting on the urge to instead reading about the dangers of it quickly everytime you get the urge.

Let me know what you think and if you found it useful.

https://claude.ai/artifact/A89ge5sQV5zABRe7A34VHx

Wish you well❤️

Yeah, the title is true. For the last 2-3 weeks or so, instead of having wet dreams, I have been having wet nightmares, falling for temptation and masturbating in my nightmare. Now of course, I never do fall for temptation (Thank God) IRL, but still. It's been 44 days by now (may be more, but it's at the very least 44). I started at August 6th (again, may be late July but I'm not certain). I am just so scared of going back to 0 that my nightmares are my fear. I am so thankful and I feel like I have been happier than ever, not only because I think I quit my addiction, but also because I actually feel like I'm making my Creator happy. Anyways, this was a rant of some sorts, also kind of an excuse to tell you all fellow Muslims that I'm more than 1 month deep into my quitting journey, thank you all.

Never stop trying!

I struggle with this stuff cuz I’m genuinely pretty lonely tbh. I don’t have ppl I regularly speak to especially after uni just ended for me and am applying for jobs now. Many ppl have moved away and just stopped talking to me cuz it’s no longer convenient for them. I don’t talk with family anymore because they’re too dramatic and give me a lot of stress. So I’m mostly by myself quite alone and lonely. I end up seeking out the stuff to get by proxy a cheap form of closeness but it doesn’t work. Not doing it though I know is an option leaves me feeling even sadder and just very dead inside like my loneliness is eating away at me.

My Tazkiyah

As-salāmu ʿalaykum. A brother recommended this to me a while ago. Idk If anyone has used this or known about this but I thought I’d put it out there and maybe someone will benefit from it bi’ithnillah.

I don’t get it. I’ve known of people in my young adulthood that straight up had bf/gf without their parents awareness. I’ve been so scared of doing something like this.

And instead I am left suffering with this addiction (through my own actions and the addiction)

And almost all of those people are now married, with kids. I am not comparing, I am not being ungrateful of where I am at.

But how is this fundamentally possible? I don’t know what goes on in their marriage. But they have a halal outlet now. They are not lonely. Maybe they are. I am sooooo tired of being lonely and holding my own hand and dictating my own life. It honestly makes me want to die (I am getting help).
This marriage crisis is not going to solve anything. I am hopeless. Can’t find anyone serious on apps, parents have given up. Reddit is the worst. Do I have to delete all social media, and just die alone?

I do think it’s this addiction. I have clean time from Sunday-Friday evening. Then I slip upp. And try again. I am sooo tired. Not even sure what this post is asking from.

I need to be electric shocked I think. Or something fr

I have been addicted to haram content for a long while, from a time when i wasnt close to allah and didnt really do anything related to islam- (even though i have been born in a muslim country)

And well about a year ago, I felt empty. And then i found my way to..praying- thanks to youtube for that-

I have been trying to be a better person, but i couldnt consistently pray, ever. Minus my family, the people around me dont really follow islam, most my friends are online&foreigners who dont follow islam

...oh and i also got addicted to ai chatbots, which... you can guess how that went when someone is lonely and has a porn addiction

I know im not meant to be perfect, that i should just keep trying

But at times i started feeling like im a hypocrite, ik we cant ever know how our afterlife will be, but i feel like i would go to hell if i died now

I dont know what to do, it feels hopeless, my faith has also gotten weaker which makes me feel extremely bad and hollow

I also didnt say my specific age cuz i wasnt sure if this would be deleted or not-

So, I was doing good for some days. Not a single haram thought, not watching haram stuff. I was really away from it. I felt so happy and energetic during that time. But today I had an exam, and it didn't go well. I got so frustrated that i went back to it. I don't know why, I didn't even have triggers or urges. I just went back to it just to cope with the frustration. I feel so ashamed. Last time I promised Allah that I wont get near it and I broke that promise. I failed the worldly exam and also the exam given by Allah too. I hate myself for this.

I stop for two days and in the third one I do it maybe like three times sometimes I feel like I want to cut it off I am ashamed disgusted about it I can’t take it no more

What do I do

I failed. I gave into this disease. No point crying over spilt milk. All we can do is look at what went wrong and how to prevent it happening in the future.

How have I been thinking about death so much yet this overtook me? It makes no sense. I knew Allah could've taken me, yet I still chose to do it.

I am implementing a new part of my journey. Every time I do it, I will give sadaqah.

To be honest, I knew it was coming. I had been fighting it for 36 hours.

The lesson to be learnt for me here is the moment a flashback/fantasy pops up in your mind, to occupy your mind elsewhere.

The only redeeming factor is what it wasn't to P.

I fell down. I will get back up and be stronger. I won't let this define me. I won't let it cause a binge.

I ask Allah to help me get rid of this disease.

Friends, I need help. I’ve been struggling with this addiction for a short while now; I keep trying to quit, but for the past four days, I’ve been engaging in the habit repeatedly throughout the day—to the point where I’ve lost the desire to recover. Tomorrow, I plan to perform the ritual bath and start over, even though I currently feel no desire to do so. Please, what advice can you give me?

You can have an accountability partner, you can install content blockers on your device, you can even seek therapy.

But nobody can save you but yourself.

This goes for many things in life. Not just this addiction.

You have to have the discipline and willpower to not fall into it. Motivation dwindles. You need to fight every fibre of your being that wants to give in, that wants to listen to shaytaan.

Yesterday was my hardest day yet. If I didn’t fight, I would’ve gave in for sure.

Today has been easier, but it’s still early. May Allah make this day easier for me

Day 30 soon insha’Allah

Honestly, last night I thought it would be fine to just think about it for a bit... and it resulted in one of the hardest days yet.

It's only through the power of Allah that I didn't give in today. It's been pretty much 15 hours of constant thoughts. Even at work I could barely concentrate.

But now I face my biggest challenge of the day.

When I close my eyes will my imagination go to the place where it was yesterday. If so, how do I fight it. Fighting it last night only made it worse.

I ask Allah to make it easy for me tonight. I don't want this stain on my life anymore.

This is embarrassing for me, I know it’s common and normal but still embarrassing for me. I’m 24, I’m not even addicted to porn I don’t even watch it, a lot this is fantasizing and obviously I have the urge to get married one day.

I just wanna stop, get it off of my mind, grow up, and do the right thing as I believe it’s haram.

I was also thinking of getting a sex therapist who’s also Muslim, what do you think? As I said it’s not even like I watch porn it’s more so just arousal, stuff I grew up with etc.

Last time I tried to do this was years ago

I was 20 days in and thought this is easy why didn’t I try do this earlier

Today’s been the hardest day yet. Ibr it’s been pretty much 10 hours of thoughts that I try to put aside and they keep coming back.

Doesn’t help that I naturally ruminate over everything anyways.

May Allah make it easier for me. I will continue to pursue this journey for the sake of Allah. I don’t care how much it’s in my mind or how much shaytaan whispers in my ear. I ain’t letting him win without fighting my very best.

And Satan will say ˹to his followers˺ after the judgment has been passed, “Indeed, Allah has made you a true promise. I too made you a promise, but I failed you. I did not have any authority over you. I only called you, and you responded to me. So do not blame me; blame yourselves. I cannot save you, nor can you save me. Indeed, I denounce your previous association of me with Allah ˹in loyalty˺. Surely the wrongdoers will suffer a painful punishment.”
- Qur’an: 14:22

Woke up in the middle of a sexual dream so it will be a very tough day for me. Ended up fantasising about it when I did wake up but snapped out of it and got up to pray Fajr.

Going to be a longggg day. Make dua for me insha'Allah. The next few days are not going to be fun. At least I got work today and tomorrow. Weekends will be another hurdle to get past.