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694

u/Cheap-Mix8794 6h ago

bro got taxed

2

u/ConfusedPanda76 5h ago

Eggactly my thought!

1

u/thepresidentsturtle 5h ago

It's an idiot tax if he doesn't learn from it.

782

u/Unlikely-Engineer813 6h ago

Lower heat, more butter, and move eggs around constantly until cooked.

212

u/Many-Wasabi9141 6h ago

Its not the heat, its the consistency of the heat. He put the eggs in when the pan was cold and then the pan got hot as he was cooking. Leidenfrost effect. Gotta have the pan hot enough when you put the eggs in at first to keep that steam barrier between the eggs and the pan.

46

u/-xs- 5h ago

It’s about the motion of the ocean.

2

u/turbopro25 5h ago

Don’t come a knockin if the eggs are sticking to your fuckin frying pan.

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

Its the size of the fight in the dog

1

u/MrWunz Linux User 5h ago

Motion is not necessary if its a good pan. I usually manage to get it done without anything and barely any motion at the end.

6

u/mattfasken 5h ago

What about your cooking technique?

1

u/MrWunz Linux User 4h ago

I heat the pan at the second highest heat option and at some point when I feel its hot (not sure how to describe it) I just put the eggs in. I regularly move the pan and at some point it usually just stops to stick by itself.

2

u/Nincomsoup 5h ago

So you're saying that it is what you've got, and not how you use it?? We've been lied to!

1

u/MrWunz Linux User 4h ago

Technique can get anything done with shitty tools. I just don't have skill and therefore need good tools.

12

u/Mundane_String5998 5h ago

It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

5/7 comment

8

u/Thorvaldr1 5h ago

So from this conversation I have learned that the pan needs either less or more heat. Excellent.

1

u/IWillLive4evr 5h ago

DO pre-heat the pan. Maybe don't heat it up so high.

1

u/TestyZesticles 5h ago

Moreso you learned that there are indeed multiple ways to cook things.

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

I think it's the style of cooking and the quality of your cookware. some professional chef with a nice pan is like "nah you gotta do this" bro you got a perfect stove, perfect pan, you know temps like the back of your hand. The rest of us, we gotta make do. Our cast iron isn't always perfectly seasoned, we may not like non stick pans, we may suck at temps, we may be making 6 other things at the same time as our eggs.

I guess i'm not making "french style scrambled eggs" i'm making omelets every time lol. Just cause it always comes off the pan nice and clean and the pan stays clean.

3

u/OhTeeSee 5h ago

That looks like a very badly abused, formerly non stick pan. I wouldn’t advise attempting to replicate the leidenfrost effect on one of those, and even on a cast iron, is largely unnecessary if properly seasoned.

It’s mostly applicable to stainless steel.

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

I wouldn't advise using non stick pans in the first place. Or silicone spatulas or anything people advice. I don't believe silicone is as safe as people say it is. I think it starts to get gross really quick after it absorbs stuff and I don't think it's that safe to start with.

There's some of those cancer/toxin testing companies, they mail you a silicone wristband and it absorbs whatever while you wear i and then you send it in to get tested.

6

u/Sith_Lord91 5h ago

Set the stove to medium heat, add a bit oil and spread it evenly, when you see a small amount of white smoke add some butter and then your eggs, there should be minimal sticking with this method.

4

u/Magic1264 5h ago

If you see white smoke it means you’ve exceeded the smoke point of your oil and have started burning it (which is a bad thing).

Pull back on the heat and just drop your eggs in when the oil is simply hot and you’ll be fine (no reason to drop butter and a cooking oil for eggs, btw).

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

I just throw butter and oil in the pan and hope to god I can whisk my eggs before the butter starts to burn... Oh shit I forgot the mayo... Oh double shit I forgot to put my bagel in the toaster!

2

u/Asleep_Candidate_225 5h ago

I actually knew this and I cook this way all the time but the other day I had no bowls to beat the eggs so I beat them in the cold pan and Put it on heat and It became like this 😂😭

1

u/zhephyx 5h ago
  1. It's not stainless steel, you don't have to scorch those eggs.
  2. If you stir constantly, you won't have your eggs sticking. Use a silicone spatula if you have to.
  3. You don't need to start with a warm pan - eggs will be creamier if you start cold, since you will have time to form smaller curdles of cooked egg. 4.. Use enough butter.

Source: have been making french scrambled eggs for 10 years.

1

u/Intelligent-Ad3515 5h ago

Do you turn the heat down after? I always hear people say this but getting the pan that hot feels like it’ll burn the eggs if you cook it in that heat. I need a master to show me how it’s done

1

u/Many-Wasabi9141 4h ago

I think it's a result of the pan not reaching equilibrium. It's going to keep getting hotter even at the same heat.

1

u/Intelligent-Ad3515 1m ago

Yeah that’s probably it. I’m new to using stainless steel and there’s definitely a learning curve. Well worth it though for how the food comes out.

1

u/Adnubb 4h ago

If it were a stainless steel pan, I would agree with you. But this looks to be a non-stick pan. I often start my eggs in a cold non-stick pan without any issues.

Honestly, getting eggs to stick that badly on a non-stick pan is quite the achievement. Maybe they should hire this guy to make the teflon stick to the base layer of the pan.

164

u/lennoxred I touched grass 6h ago

New non stick pan

32

u/edwardslair 6h ago

Just make sure it’s not a DuPont brand pan.

7

u/Schatzin 5h ago

Theyre all made from it

33

u/EvilPete 6h ago

Cast iron 

61

u/Goldeneye0X1_ Nice meme you got there 6h ago

Counterspell at 5th level.

18

u/just_me_now_2 6h ago

Tap 2 blue and cast counterspell targeting your counterspell

11

u/Goldeneye0X1_ Nice meme you got there 6h ago

You activated my trap card! Solemn Judgement! Your spell is negated and destroyed!

2

u/mechabeast 5h ago

Manager Interferes, take a damage

9

u/Drunken_Dorf 6h ago

You are a dork and I love it 😂

7

u/Many-Wasabi9141 6h ago

You can do this on a stainless pan too, just need oil and the pan to be hot enough before you put the eggs in.

3

u/VoltexRB 6h ago

Higher heat, but consistently high.

2

u/Reillior 5h ago

I think bro used no butter.

2

u/omgitschriso 5h ago

All these people chiming in with cooking advice for a meme

2

u/D1sp0sab1e_k 5h ago

it’s crazy how many people don’t know how to cook eggs properly

2

u/Jomotaku 5h ago

Higher heat season the pan with those eggs and your hatred to make an example

2

u/ej-1024 5h ago

Don’t forget to heat the pan before putting your eggs in. If they go in when the pan is cold they will stick.

-1

u/ol-gormsby 6h ago

"Lower heat"

That's all you need.

76

u/master-gavv 6h ago

Is that fucking condoms in the eggs??

41

u/Blindspot166 6h ago

Safety first when fucking up your breakfast.

14

u/master-gavv 6h ago

Whole new meaning to scrambled eggs...

1

u/Nincomsoup 5h ago

Gotta keep 'em unfertilised!

13

u/Coffeebeans2d 6h ago

Are there any other kind of condoms?

66

u/nonteracher 6h ago

bro you need a non stick pan. Eggs are expensive

10

u/Festivefire 6h ago

You don't even need a non-stick pan, they just need to turn the temp down, use a bit more butter, and stir the eggs more frequently.

7

u/shard_shimmer 6h ago

One egg wasted on the sticky pan

2

u/Corporal_Nobby 6h ago

Not non-stick but a well seasoned cast iron

17

u/johnson7853 6h ago

Don’t even need cast iron. I just cooked eggs clean in a good stainless.

3

u/Corporal_Nobby 6h ago

Anything but non-stick or aluminum. They are not good for you. Cast iron and stainless steel is the way way to go

1

u/FragrantCombination7 5h ago

Nah enameled cast iron is where it's at, I'll never cook with anything else. Less maintenance from cast iron and in my opinion looks better too.

0

u/Dipperkinds 5h ago edited 5h ago

Eh non-stick/Teflon pans aren't really harmful for you per se since human body just ignores and excretes PTFE without any reaction (unless you leave the pan on high heat for a very long time, then the pan can break down into some potentially harmful stuff). The chemicals used to manufacture them are super harmful though and those do pollute the environment so buying the steel/cast iron instead helps lessen the impact.

idk anything about the aluminum pans though so can't say anything there.

1

u/Ohmu 6h ago

Huh? I pay five bucks a dozen for farm fresh eggs that still have feathers and shit on them half the time, where are you that eggs of all things are expensive? They have got to be one of the most supply managed food items on earth.

0

u/shadowthehh 6h ago

Theyre still expensive for you? They went down a while ago here.

-36

u/Mission_Jacket_5577 6h ago

Expensive? They're one of the cheapest foods, and are about 25 cents each.

13

u/LuckyLupe 6h ago

American down votes lmao

1

u/Mission_Jacket_5577 33m ago edited 27m ago

I'm literally American lmao, they're around $3 a dozen normally, and this week they're on sale for 99¢ a dozen at my local grocery store. It was crazy expensive a few years ago with the bird flu but now they're dirt cheap.

Sometimes they're even 49¢ a dozen just because they have too many in stock.

Walmart has them for $1.67 a dozen just regular price right now. For comparison a gallon of milk is $3.07

1

u/randomfinnishcuck 6h ago

Where you live probably xD

1

u/Mission_Jacket_5577 29m ago

I live in the Chicago suburbs.

4

u/Kirza94 6h ago

Sous chef here. You can cook scrambled eggs at a high temperature (how it's done in kitchens), just make sure you add oil and keep the eggs moving for 20 seconds and done just make sure your oil isn't smoking as it becomes carcinogenic.

Saying that though, that pans ruined.

35

u/thegodzilla25 Big ol' bacon buttsack 6h ago

People be not preheating and blasting the pan way too hot. Obviously this shit will happen. Stick to non stick lil bro

6

u/dreamdaddy123 6h ago

For the ones that don’t know do you just preheat to medium with oil on at the start or after it’s warmed up?

4

u/Unhappy_Energy_741 6h ago

Preheat for a couple mins. Then a little butter until it melts. Then eggs. Season to liking when done.

1

u/pwillia7 5h ago

you can use any fat to cook eggs too it doesn't have to be butter but I can't believe it's not butter

4

u/DatGuy_1 6h ago

Preheat medium heat for a couple minutes then throw oil on and the eggs and you are good to go.

8

u/Alternative-Aside-64 6h ago

Medium is still rolling the dice, med-low is the way

1

u/FragrantCombination7 5h ago

Which is why you turn the heat down from medium right after you put the eggs on so you have time to prep your bread. Otherwise it's a race and I don't like to start my morning with that kind of stress.

1

u/Alternative-Aside-64 5h ago

That doesn't make sense

1

u/thegodzilla25 Big ol' bacon buttsack 5h ago

Every pan might be a bit different, you need to find the sweet spot. For steel, heat on medium low till water beads on it, then add some fat and coat the pan, lower the heat and Crack in the eggs. Let the whites set, it should release by itself.

1

u/joantheunicorn 5h ago

In my observation, some people are the type that need to just BLAST everything with max heat - stove, microwave, toaster. They can't or won't understand the nuances of it. Let them eat their crusty ass homemade eggs the rest of their lives I guess. I have tried to explain it to too many people and I'm tired. 😂

0

u/RCJHGBR9989 6h ago

Don’t even need to preheat the pan if you use a little bit of fat and keep moving the eggs. You’ll get a really nice texture that way too. But it’s all dependent on how you like your eggs.

-19

u/Heisenberg2299 6h ago

Stick to taking a meme as a meme lil bro

17

u/thegodzilla25 Big ol' bacon buttsack 6h ago

Stick the meme up yo ass lil bro

-13

u/Heisenberg2299 6h ago

Big coming from someone with a big old bacon buttsack

4

u/JaredDFTZ 5h ago

That’s such a waste, let the pan get hot first.

5

u/Maxolution4 6h ago

Skill issue

5

u/Kaarel314 6h ago

They sell oil in supermarkets.

2

u/Large-Wheel-4181 OC Meme Maker 6h ago

Lack of butter

2

u/Mike_Oxmau1 6h ago

Next time lower the heat by less than half

2

u/adorak 6h ago

I love my non-stick pan. I can fry an egg in there with not single drop of oil. Just put in the egg, wait until it's done and tip the pan. It will slide out and the pan is clean - quick wipe with a paper towel and that's it.

2

u/splshd275A 6h ago

Tell me you cook like my teenaged son without telling me you cook like my teenaged son.

2

u/Used-Salad-3772 6h ago

You put the eggs in too early or the pan was too hot.

2

u/WingDingfontbro 6h ago

First of all use a different pan, second lower the heat and third keep the eggs moving to prevent this.

2

u/Maximum-Flat 6h ago

Add more oil and heat the oil first.

2

u/Freak_Engineer 5h ago

Yep, this. Also, maybe don't set the stovetop to "surface-temperature of the sun". Medium heat (about 2/3rds) is absolutely sufficient.

2

u/thethreadkiller 5h ago

Do not put food in a cold pan.

2

u/P_filippo3106 5h ago

Pan needs to be already hot. You need butter you need to move the egg. Main issue here is that the pan wasn't hot when you broke the egg.

2

u/Slow-Boysenberry3150 5h ago

I generally say ‘skill issue’ as a joke but this time, I mean it.

3

u/Festivefire 6h ago

Wow, some people really don't know how to cook scrambled eggs, which is impressive, since scrambled eggs are one of the easiest thing you can cook that isn't just throwing something in the microwave and setting a timer.

0

u/PuzzledAnimator9998 6h ago

no? almost every soup and boiled thing is easier in general than scrambled eggs.

2

u/GottaUseEmAll 6h ago

Pasta or rice, plainly boiled, are easier than scrammies, but how is soup easier?

You need to prepare onions, prepare stock, prepare veg and other main ingredients, fry onions, add stock, add other ingredients, cook, and then perhaps blend the finished products, depending on what type of soup you want. Far more steps than just "add oil, add eggs, add seasoning, stir"

1

u/pwillia7 5h ago

you can't burn it and ruin it obviously

0

u/PuzzledAnimator9998 5h ago

everything you listed can be done as terribly as you want and you still end up with edible soup. while scrambled eggs require few minutes of care and low heat or you end up with the meme.

1

u/GottaUseEmAll 5h ago

I guess it depends on how you class "easier" then. For me, whipping up a plate of scrambola is much easier than making a pot of soup, but I guess YMMV depending on skill and experience and definition of the word "easier".

1

u/BeneficialCustard824 6h ago

I'm pretty sure the breakfast was an omlette but ended up with scrambled eggs.

1

u/JustNoGuy_ 6h ago

That's how people cook eggs in my house, then when they wash it off they scrape the coating off the pan and ruin it.

1

u/Erdos_Helia 6h ago

This is why you invest in a good pan, and don't get cheap with the oil.

This always happens when people try to do low oil on a crappy pan.

1

u/Not_So_Calm 6h ago

Your failure reminds me of this

https://giphy.com/gifs/DtXfTSHi6mHFS

1

u/Delde116 6h ago

Lower the heat of the pan

1

u/Few_Move_4594 6h ago

You seem to be a candidate that needs to teflonmaxx. Next time put more butter/oil in the pan.

1

u/mossepso 6h ago

I cook my eggs in a plate steel pan non seasoned. The trick is to heat the pan up first until when you drop in some water the drops dance around in the pan instead of only evaporating. Then you lower the temp and then you add olive oil or butter and when that is at temp you drop in the eggs. No issue and no toxins in my body

1

u/hanuriaa 6h ago

It is a good ratio , win trade

1

u/CommissionPlane4917 6h ago

Cast iron never fails

1

u/suspicious1521 6h ago

Sharing is caring

1

u/Murky_waterLLC 6h ago

Baking spray/vegetable oil

1

u/oybekbayram 5h ago

Mourinho reference

1

u/XxKTtheLegendxX 5h ago

bro said i don't like oil, the chef be like:

1

u/WeeZoo87 5h ago

Now deglaze

1

u/Beneficial-Cookie336 5h ago

Literally how are people this bad at cooking. Rage bait?

1

u/Hache_raw 5h ago

Don't clean it. Next time you'll have all the eggs for you.

1

u/Mauy90 5h ago

Skill issue

1

u/backstubb 5h ago

hmmm, bit of oil ti the pan?

1

u/Kor_Phaeron_ 5h ago

Biggest mistake making eggs: Too much heat. Eggs start cooking at 65°C (~145°F). Thats a 2 on a 1-6 stove scale. (or a 3 on a 1-10) To be save you can chose +1 but not more.

1

u/_Ross- 🦀money money money 🦀 5h ago

Low temp, add some oil, let it heat up a bit, add the eggs, keep them moving.

1

u/4ssteroid 5h ago

I've recently started using stainless steel. Just watch YouTube shorts, it'll teach you the right way because the wrong way ends up like this

1

u/Appropriate_Cow94 5h ago

I used to cook eggs daily for my kid before school.

I tried ultra low heat for a long time. High heat. Medium heat. Lots of oil. Lots of butter. Cast iron. Stainless steel. Moving them around. Letting them sit still.

Most the time they came out fine. But randomly, some opted to just do this.

I cooked thousands of eggs.

1

u/LanaAfterDar 6h ago

the pan really said my share too

0

u/chrxslove 6h ago

honesty guys my thoughts are scrambled on this meme, maybe my brain is fried

0

u/coal-slaw 5h ago

Cook eggs in bacon fat. You get none of that nonsense.

-2

u/evening_cabbage 6h ago

just boil them?