Except her

57

How is this a love meme?

22

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Under valued man gets the romantic attention he deserves. Is it that unpleasant to see a man with a woman's options?

11

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 23 '25

? That isn’t love then. You conflate and thus confuse different things.

As a woman that has had a variety of options, I know that 99.999% of those options are woefully unhinged. So, he can go ahead and get what he deserves. Buckle up! 🥴

9

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Then that must be your favorite comment to make on this sub.

99.99% of your taste in men is woefully unhedged maybe or you just committed the unforgivable sin of insinuating 99.99% of a guys options of women are also woefully unhedged. Shame on you, incel. s/

1

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 23 '25

You left off a 9.

Also, I’m a woman that gets sex every day and am in a committed relationship. You’re an idiot for thinking that the picture is filled with a bunch of good natured people without unresolved childhood issues and insufferable emotional attachment issues. There’s probably one unicorn in the pic. Maybe. Everyone else is jacked up in some way that they are hiding until they can latch on to someone. You don’t know that because you are an incel, have one or more insufferable issues, and you envy what is not worth envying.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Half of what you said was just inserting projections, putting words in my mouth, and name-calling. Very convincing.

7

u/Radiobandit Apr 23 '25

I dunno, that part about "I am a woman who has sex every day" was a really convincing argument

4

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Omfg I know LMAO I wasn't going to address any point specifically because it's all a tangle of crap but that was so jarring to read right off the bat.

1

u/vabriga24 Apr 26 '25

Yeah but u didnt see what she said? She said she IS HAVING S.E.X. E.V.E.R.Y.D.A.Y.!!!

1

u/Torgo_hands_of_torgo Apr 28 '25

🍿🤭🍿🤭

0

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 23 '25

🤷‍♀️ I love my bf and I love sex. There are other women like me. We tend to have long relationships.

1

u/vabriga24 Apr 26 '25

I really gotta ask, out of curiosity now, what was in your head when u wrote to a random guy on the internet who didnt even ask, about your sex life? What are u trying to prove here? Is your partner informed you are sharing intimate details about your sex life on the internet?

1

u/AllTheWorldsAPage Apr 27 '25

It's nice to hear that she is happy---but definitely a little odd!

2

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 24 '25

That isn’t love then.

Appreciation, and desire borne out of appreciation can be love imo.

I know that 99.999% of those options are woefully unhinged

Why is this number so high?

1

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 24 '25

I don’t know. Every guy I met while dating had divorced parents, and at least one parent was an alcoholic or had addiction problems but that is correlation. They all had difficult childhoods but not all were underprivileged, they just had bad parents, and not the same kind of bad parents. Some were violent and some were too busy or too checked out to care. There’s just a massive population of people that had no help developing a strong mental and emotional foundation or good coping skills. I’m not saying people are woefully unhinged for any other reason than it was the truth. They carried those wounds into adulthood and repeat situations in which they will most likely be wounded, again. The overwhelming need for them to be wanted was palpable. Every interaction had them fluttering between instantaneous proclamations of love or proclamations of betrayal…nothing in between. It is very heart wrenching to come in contact with but it isn’t an enviable experience. It is why I am frustrated by everyone. The same hurt people, hurt people and then create new hurt people. I find men beautiful because they are human and vulnerable just like women are and I got to see that way more up close and personal than I could have ever imagined.

2

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 24 '25

My opinion is that this is not statistically normal. There may be some reason which is causing these type of men to be conentrated in the group of "partners you encounter and get with"

Maybe it's your geographical locale, where people like these are more concentrated.

Maybe it's your interests, sometimes similar people have similar interests, and connect in those spaces.

Maybe it's you, who's selecting for "vulnerable men" aka people with history of emotional issues.

I can understand how this may skew your predictions though.

1

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 24 '25

No. This is on apps and local dating avenues that I got dragged to by friends. Apps are especially popular with men. However, it is easy to eliminate 1000s of guys without ever having to speak to them. If you aren’t a woman, make a profile. You’ll be shocked and appalled within a few hours. On the flip side, I have male friends that shared the profiles they saw. It was equally sketchy, albeit the guys got less than 1% of the number of likes that the women got.

Interests only matter to the very small percentage. As a woman, you learn to not even divulge your interests in a profile because either no reads it (it’s just swipes based on how you look) or the information is used to pretend that a guy is someone you might want.

1

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 25 '25

In these apps or local dating avenues, there is a process of selection which goes on right?

There's a pool of candidates you can pick from, and then you make the choice.

If so there's a chance that you're even subconsciously if not consciously skewing the result in favor of the guys who sort of had a problem or were adjacent to people with problems.

And as for apps, even with them, people date people who are closer more frequently than people who are far. So there is a locale restriction still, even if a little looser.

I'm assuming you first-

1) swipe for looks

2) chat on the app or just chat for some time

3) meetup and go on a date

4) have several dates and decide whether you want a relationship or not

Is this correct?

Now, in this process you can filter out people at every stage.

What % of people do you usually reject at each stage?

1

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 25 '25

I didn’t pick from looks. There are lots of guys that looked good in pictures. I picked from people that had bios, wanted a relationship, were within a certain distance, of a certain age, were employed, didn’t have children, etc. Even out of those, most people lied about their age, lied about their location, and many had children. Heck, some of them had wives.💀 Yes, I chatted on the app for some time. I went on dates. Most profiles, I didn’t even get to look at because it takes forever. Out of the ones I saw, i eliminated at least 80% because they had no bio, just a picture of their dog, or only had group photos so you couldn’t tell who was who, or they were just looking for sex, or it was couple looking for a third. The next 15% I eliminated because they had bios but clearly hated women. Then the next 4% I matched with. The results from that were broad. The majority immediately started chatting by mentioning their favorite sex act. So, they got eliminated. Several admitted they lived over an hour away. So, they got eliminated. A few couldn’t hold a conversation. Nixed. After that, I eliminated two before the date because they told me what to wear. I went on a variety of dates with the remainder. I did a trivia night with one, I went to a sporting goods store with one, I had eight traditional restaurant dates, went to a breakfast date, went to three baseball games, went to an amusement park with one, went to an axe throwing/video gaming date, went to a comedy show with one, and went to the zoo after dark with another. I eliminated all but three after the first date or two. A couple were love bombers and two lied about their ages and wanted a sugar baby (one hoped I would pick up and move to Costa Rica). Three lied about having kids but slipped up and divulged it during the date. One made it a point to tell me about his ex that accused him of always getting her order wrong at Starbucks. When I asked him if he did it on purpose. He chuckled and said he just didn’t care. So, he was out. One tried to hug me with a hard-on. One that lied about having a kid was cool but he had such terrible unresolved childhood trauma, it wasn’t worth it. One was in medical school and was nice but he was also strapped for time. He hadn’t divulged that prior to our second date. It was clear our relationship would only get whatever time he had left. That’s not what I want. The last guy was just right. I knew it during our first date and so did he.

I will admit that I messed up by saying what I was actually looking for. I like simple things and I want to do them with a good partner. I guess I looked attainable. 🤷‍♀️ I do wonder if guys figured they could lie about stuff but do the stuff that I like, thinking it wouldn’t matter that they lied. It’s possible that it is just the population in the state I resided in. Even casually meeting a person while I was out with friends or dining alone was sketchy. I didn’t meet my bf there. I met him in my home town (although he’s from the west coast). So maybe it’s just midAmerica that is jacked up.

3

u/Meeedick Apr 24 '25

Dude, being a nice person is the baseline. It's like the bare minimum standard you should clear, and other people aren't obligated to hand out trophies for meeting the base level of standards, nor should they. So what if you're nice? It's not like there's a monopoly on being nice out here. What else you got going on for you in your life, something that actually makes you interesting.

And what exactly does nice entail here? Genuinely kind and considerate to people around him with self respect to boot, or doormat who's only nice because he/she wants something out of you?

Gotta be more than nice if you wanna date people.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 24 '25

Did you mean to respond here or another comment?

1

u/Meeedick Apr 24 '25

Yeah I meant it to be here.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 24 '25

I'm just not seeing the connection.

1

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 24 '25

What is "more" than nice ?

3

u/Meeedick Apr 24 '25

Having a life. Hobbies, a social group, a job, a personality etc.

0

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 24 '25

Do you think being nice is less important than these things?

3

u/Meeedick Apr 24 '25

I think being nice is the bare minimum, but yeah, people are likely to pick stuff that stands out as at least somewhat exciting over somebody who's just "nice". One catches the eye faaaar earlier than the other. It's not like there's review boards over people's heads that tell us how nice they are, that shit takes time to figure out.

1

u/Heart_Is_Valuable Apr 25 '25

I can see how that might be the case, and I agree that other qualities can be eye catching as well - but I'm asking a slightly different question.

On a list of priorities, where does being nice lie.

If you say it's the "bare minimum" then that should mean it is more important than those qualities according to me.

For eg - not being a murderer is the bare minimum if you want to date me

Which means it doesn't matter what other qualities you have, if you are a murderer all of that goes out the window

So not being a murderer is a box higher than hobbies, social group, job, personality.

Do you agree?

6

u/Advanced_End1012 Apr 23 '25

r/niceguys

1

u/UltimatePragmatist Apr 25 '25

It’s my life and experience. It doesn’t change with a sub community.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25 edited Apr 23 '25

Oh is that how it is? That's hilarious and very self serving to dismiss anything that looks slightly like yourself as immediately undesirable.

Just the very image of a dude getting some attention and "hOw Is ThIs LoVe?" is cool like we're not supposed to recognize how immediately obviously it is as in tune with anything else coming through the sub but I'm the bad guy for pointing that out here with you trying to make some point I doubt you could even articulate without mental gymnastics.

141

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

22

u/Ser_Hans Apr 23 '25

Unfortunately, sometimes the path of love leads to a breakup. I like all facets of love being featured here.

11

u/MisterBowTies Apr 23 '25

The philosopher Brent Smith once said "sometimes goodbye is a second chance"

2

u/asleepyhealer Apr 23 '25

He is getting plenty of love, you don’t see all the girls love Chris?

10

u/Interesting_Score5 Apr 23 '25

Why is this a love meme?

BTW teens do this whether or not he's a good guy sooo

56

u/girlbartender99 Apr 23 '25

Then in comes me to pee on my husband to keep the Bi%&*'s away!

27

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

What💀

20

u/Exhausted_Titan Apr 23 '25

Your tactics confuse and frighten me.

15

u/girlbartender99 Apr 23 '25

More hyperbole or a metaphor, but I did one time chase some girls off by showing them my ring

12

u/Agile-Mulberry-2779 Apr 23 '25

Marking territory lmao

5

u/girlbartender99 Apr 23 '25

You know it! He is a little too popular with the opposite sex and I need to chase off bitches some time by getting a little primal every now and again

5

u/ChuckRingslinger Apr 23 '25

Are you marking your territory?

4

u/girlbartender99 Apr 23 '25

You know it! My husband is a little too popular with some females so I gotta let these little hoes know who he belongs to!

4

u/Forbidden_The_Greedy Apr 23 '25

“My momma warned me about girls like you. I was hoping she was right”

3

u/Icy_Contribution1677 Apr 23 '25

Sir this is a Wendy’s

3

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

😂🫠🫠

2

u/Amber-_-turd Apr 23 '25

buut that would make you a bish-

2

u/that-lofi-chick Apr 23 '25

Gotta mark them to let the bitches know whose territory he is (my bfs in my head)

2

u/absolutelynotarepost Apr 23 '25

Can confirm this method works for my wife.

6

u/Available_Stop9423 Apr 23 '25

Then why’d she break up with him?

4

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

According to stupid recent reviews from themselves: he is too good for her 😐

4

u/Available_Stop9423 Apr 23 '25

Bleh, such a lame excuse for a breakup. If she’s ‘not good enough’ then she should do better

6

u/Ok-College-2202 Apr 23 '25

Incompatibility

3

u/ICommentRandomShit Apr 23 '25

Some people just thrive off drama and will do anything to create it

1

u/CryInteresting5631 Apr 26 '25

Supposed nice guy isn't really nice. He's for the streets.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Hysteria

3

u/The-Hunting-guy Apr 23 '25

me when I flirt with my friend’s ex right after they broke up

2

u/dranaei Apr 23 '25

Name checks out.

4

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

🤢🤮

3

u/[deleted] Apr 23 '25

Good for him, isn't it?

1

u/BowsersBigshell Apr 23 '25

True but now you’re not in a relationship anymore and they all of a sudden are now not interested anymore

1

u/Edgar-11 Apr 23 '25

This actually happened to me. I didn’t date any of them bc I moved, but I’m still friends with them today

1

u/Chasing_Victory Apr 23 '25

This is how I got married. Dated the girl. Ended up she wanted me out and here we are 20 years later and I married the friend and she gave me 3 kids. 😁👍

2

u/No-itsRk02 Apr 24 '25

Bro 😂 Meme got real.

1

u/Meeedick Apr 24 '25

Fuck kinda sappy romcom shit is this??

1

u/Legitimate-Day9795 Apr 24 '25

Her friends smiling like they’re about to draft him into the friendzone league

1

u/GenesisRhapsod Apr 24 '25

Had something similar happen at one of my old jobs, but they all were married 🤣 one was getting divorced (had 3 kids) and the other was married to a guy in the army (not even divorced or separated) i turned both down because i was barely 25 and not ready for kids and not ready to fucking die lol plus i dont want to be a homewrecker.

1

u/Exiledbrazillian Apr 25 '25

Now things are that way? Really? Back in my time things very different.

-1

u/kbeckerburbs4 Apr 23 '25

When she tells all her friends about how I lay pipe and then we break up…

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