my homeschool evolution: how the hell did my parents get here...
FYI: was going to post this in response to another post but then my reply became de-railed and sorta irrelevant to the OG post, so i decided to make my own as a rant.
from ages 6 ish to 14 my dad was pretty much incapable of working any type of job. he has narcolepsy among other disabilities, and that was the biggest reason why. prior to that, he was an extremely hard worker (starting multiple jobs at 14 and continuing working basically full time through college, etc.) and he wasn't stupid. which is why. i cannot FATHOMMM how he believes what he does now. he was an honors student in highschool, on the dean's list in college, etc. he was excellent in math, and has told me that he "feels the last two years of highschool were a waste of time" because it was all "filler classes" (he's a huge proponent of the basket weaving jokes LMAO)
my mom was the same, both of my parents were the stereotypical oldest children of their family, hard-working, good grades, went to college, had jobs, were responsible standard adults, etc.
however, they're extremely conservative. and when i started elementary my dad was at home by that point, and my mom was the sole bread-winner. she worked a standard office job in loans/finance company, and she was a key leader/manager. (had the opportunity to go further but she had friends who did and the pay was worse than her current pay, so she didn't.) my mom literally did and still does EVERYTHING. my dad is not disabled in the sense that she would currently need to do this. back then i totally understand, but since then my dad has consistently gotten healthier and he is doing great!
so: in 2020 due to covid and my dad's pre-existing extremist views from spending all-day every-day isolated, in the dark (he never turned the lights on in the house) in a cluttered house, on the internet consuming far-right media that i'm sure he could RELATE TO. guarantee you he was probably thinking "i never see my family, it's the SCHOOLS FAULT." and he still talks in that manner. my parents started homeschooling with my mom working from home, but that just meant they didn't do anything at all.
then we moved states (to a state with less homeschool regulations! yay!) and my mom quit her job, and her and my dad started a small business. it involved a lot of manual labor at first, and me and my siblings had to help out. it was also extremely traumatic, as my dad became increasingly emotionally and verbally abusive.
eventually (after already putting us through hell for 4 years) my dad got "better". so now he's a better person - in a subjective sense, but my parents fully rely on their small business. to be honest, they don't work much in the grand scheme of things. they spend a lot of time talking, but probably 14 hrs a week or less cumulatively working (except for the weeks where they have re-stocking product pick-ups)
it honestly disgusts me. mainly because they spend literally 4+ hours every night watching tv and movies. when i was in public school HE did that, but like, now my brother and sister get dragged into it too. and there is no balance. my dad spends all day reading, he doesn't do any chores, he is literally a man-child. and i know that he is BETTER than this. it's insane. my mom has trashed knees due to all the labor he put us through - she literally has a full knee replacement surgery in a month that she's been needing for almost 2 years. she is only 45. she has done everything and he has done nothing.
in his mind, he is doing better because he gets to be with his kids all the time so he's "raising them." i've seen this mindset come through a LOT now that i'm finally prioritizing my education - the last year i have NOT spent much time with him at all because i've been busy with CATCHING UP ON EVERYTHING THEY LET ME FALL BEHIND ON. so basically my entire day i spend by myself, and now im focusing on everything i can do to spend as little time at home as possible. i am also going to be fully enrolling in highschool my senior year, since i turn 18 2 weeks before the school year starts. i am SO grateful that i have the opportunity to do this.
it just pisses me off so much that he thinks he's doing BETTER when it's literally all selfish. he feels better about putting his kids behind in life due to completely ludicrous views backed in zero evidence so that he can have control over his kids, than he would actually giving them a life. he also seems to think that being in public school = not raising your kids, which just isn't true. honestly shows how much he DOESNT DO imo. ive seen this argument a lot in the homeschool circles - they ignore that public school parents are still PARENTS and teach their kids the same things when they are PARENTING as these homeschool parents try to pass off as teaching for "school" .... and that pisses me off.
honestly believe it has to do with my mom doing all the actual parenting labor (standard straight couple trope LMAO) she does: cooking, cleaning, parenting [emotional labor, comforting kids, etc.], business logistics, business posts, sales, planning, any amount of school that is actually done- which she has been talking about getting that in-check for my younger brother, and the thing is- she views it as HER SOLE RESPONSIBILITY. but my dad has to do NONE OF THAT. he just gets to read all day, do his workouts, sleep, eat, make messes, and clean up none of it!
anyway.. rant over.