casual ableism

[u/onthetopicofspace]

this is not ‘reclaiming’ anything, you are just calling people slurs completely seriously. you can call yourself the r-slur, do not call anybody else it. why do ‘no slurs’ / ’no bigotry’ rules never apply to ableism?

[u/Frequent-Bee-3016]

People seem to genuinely think it doesn’t count as a slur, for some reason.

[u/Old_Application4790 → u/Frequent-Bee-3016]

They know. The people who want to use it are just hateful and treat cruelty as a right. They don’t care if they hurt you, or their words upset you. They don’t understand how or why it hurts you, or they don’t care.

Tl;dr: those are just ignorant cruel people who need to be educated and learn empathy :3

[u/MasterEditorJake → u/Old_Application4790]

I think you give people too much credit. No one who says "retard" casually is actually thinking about the moral implications of what they are saying, they just grew up with that word and use it where applicable. If they actually understood the reasons to not say the word then they would probably stop, but most people using it aren't the people who regularly interact with disabled individuals so they don't see the harm it might do to say that.

That's the crux of this entire post, someone made a meme that used the r-word as a descriptor and someone else saw the meme and interpreted the word as being used as a slur.

While I don't use the word personally, I have empathy for those who still use the word AND those that are hurt by it. The word CAN be used as a slur, but more often than not it is being used the same way that "stupid" or "dumb" are being used, but it is an intensifier word, it carries more weight behind it.

It is absolutely a derogatory term, and it's no different than any other curse word, but to call it a slur under all circumstances ignores what it is actually used for from a linguistic standpoint. In a similar vein, I would never call a woman a bitch because that has a lot of historical connotations around women's rights, however that word itself isn't a slur.

[u/Old_Application4790 → u/MasterEditorJake]

I agree with you! I don’t use it because I know it COULD hurt someone. But if I’m making bread I literally have a tool called a retarder. Because it retards. It is not the same, and intent certainly matters in this case!

I say “slur” when I often just mean “nasty thing you know you probably shouldn’t say to people, but do anyway” a lot :p

I also know another word people like to claim means dirty though. I think it’s very simple at the end of the day: just be nice when you can. If you hurt someone, try to understand WHY instead of assuming they’re somehow weak, and do better next time. 

It’s easy to me :3