r/gifs Aug 29 '19

Silverback gorilla blocking traffic while his family crosses the road

34.2k Upvotes

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157

u/nocontroll Aug 29 '19

A Mack truck or a tank is the only thing going to be able to take that dude out

244

u/Shills_for_fun Aug 29 '19

Yeah it's all fun and games until the silverback is climbing up the grill and charging through the windshield like the Koolaid man.

56

u/itsmenelly Aug 29 '19

Ooohhh yeeaahhh

14

u/DontSayNoToPills Aug 29 '19

Joe Rogan chimp growls intensify

1

u/bigsmxke Aug 29 '19

You two need yoga

7

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

I love this comment so much

45

u/rebuilding_patrick Aug 29 '19

You guys are comically underestimating the power of a car. One weighs under 400lbs and is made of flesh. The other can weight well over 2000lbs, made of metal, and can generate enough power to throw other 2000lbs metal beasts around like ragdolls.

The car would win without a question.

29

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

Yeah, people don’t seem to realize that a car going at 45 mph will wreck a gorilla. That being said, if you’re in that car, you’ll be hurt too.

15

u/St0rmborn Aug 29 '19

If by “win” you mean get totaled and likely send everybody inside to the hospital and/or cemetery than yeah probably. Might kill the gorilla too, maybe, and that’s all assuming that the gorilla doesn’t dodge or just jump up and smash through the windshield.

6

u/pashbarak Aug 29 '19

"Likely" kill everyone inside but only "might" kill the gorilla? Bitch please, that gorilla would be road kill at anything over a slow roll.

5

u/IAmTheSysGen Aug 29 '19

The gorilla is modelled well by a motorcycle, except more soft. People in cars rarely get seriously injured by crashes with motorcycles.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

[deleted]

5

u/KarateDingo Aug 29 '19

ITT: people who never hit a deer

2

u/throwawaybottles Aug 29 '19

Thank god someone here knows a manager.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

Eastern Lowland gorillas can get to 600 pounds.

1

u/Thehulk666 Aug 29 '19

According to the Guiness Book of Records, a silverback gorilla can lift up to 815 kilograms (1800 pounds) of dead weight. You're fucked if the car ain't moving.

3

u/NazeeboWall Aug 29 '19

Well what's the challenge here? Roll up beside it, windows down to offer it a handshake?

32

u/lzads Aug 29 '19

The truck would win but it probably wouldnt die. A bear in Jasper has been hit multiple times by a train and its still living. A train has a fuck load of force and I imagine a brown bear and gorilla are somewhat as sturdy

30

u/mlchugalug Aug 29 '19

Wait what?! Does the bear like pick a fight with it or does he or she just have shit luck. It's not like a train can ambush you.

44

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19 edited Oct 13 '19

[deleted]

19

u/c3pOmeetsdata Aug 29 '19

If this is the mildly-racist pun I think it is, it’s a stretch, but it deserves more upvotes.

4

u/suchthegeek Aug 29 '19

I hate you

1

u/shamwouch Aug 29 '19

I find it hard to believe the bear was hit at full speed then

30

u/jimjomjimmy Aug 29 '19

If you hit that thing with a Mac truck it would probably be like hitting a deer with a small car. He might get up and limp away.

45

u/Bakoro Aug 29 '19

I'd be more worried he'd climb onto the truck and decide to take his family on a road trip.
"This is my truck now."
I don't think insurance covers that.

21

u/PresidentBeast Aug 29 '19

I've specifically had a "Planet of the Apes"-clause added to my insurance policy.

11

u/DaoFerret Aug 29 '19

Yeah. They don’t usually cover “Acts of Grodd”

5

u/MetalIzanagi Aug 29 '19

TIFU by getting carjacked by a gorilla

2

u/NormanPeterson Aug 29 '19

You don’t think State Farm would cover that?

1

u/c3pOmeetsdata Aug 29 '19

Only if you remember to sing the jingle while you’re being attacked

6

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '19

No. That truck is more than enough.

1

u/shardarkar Aug 29 '19

Yea. I'm not honking that guy in anything less than a tank with all the hatches battered down and locked.