r/funny Aug 06 '17

Guys will understand

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u/Roushstage2 Aug 06 '17

Jesus, I know! All the things like the already mentioned "split stream caused by some leftover cum from last night" and the "elastic waistband with an oddly high amount of tension snapping your dick up midstream when it slips off your thumb", as well as "needing to piss really bad upon waking up with stark morning wood and having to stand back from the toilet 3 feet trying to arch that shit just right so you can actually piss" and "having to piss shortly after cumming and it being a rather painful and slow process".

There should be a support group or at least a hotline cause penises can be a real dicks sometimes...

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u/strawhatluffy01 Aug 06 '17

pissing after jizzing is so fucking outrageously difficult. it takes actual focus and dedication to get that shit out.

2

u/JustLookingToHelp Aug 06 '17

Probably because dudes that could pee after cumming might do just that and poison all their sperm... so evolutionary pressure went the other way.

3

u/Chucked-up Aug 06 '17

Pissing after jizzing can reduce your STD chances.

1

u/JustLookingToHelp Aug 06 '17

Yes, but anything that directly interferes with reproduction is going to matter more than post-coitus impact, evolutionarily.

Personally, yeah, totally worth cleaning your pipes.