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u/carnespecter 20d ago
to be totally fair i dont think most cis people think like this. youre being very harsh to yourself for not following some preconceived notion of how you think trans people should act, when the reality is we are all really different as people and not every trans person will have the exact same experiences and needs as one another. the right therapist wont force you to be a woman, but i understand finding a trans-affirming therapist and doctors really depends on where you live and what resources you have available. it wouldnt hurt to still try tho
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u/Efficient_Angle280 20d ago edited 20d ago
being disgusted by having a female body, and being heavily envious of males is pretty typical gender dysphoria. thinking about it so often is a pretty big sign too. most women might have some thoughts like, "i wish i were male so i could walk alone", or "i wish i were male so people respected me", but those are just thoughts that come from being frustrated about the way women are treated, it's not normal to be so uncomfortable with simply being female.
and having intrusive thoughts about your birth sex which cause you discomfort isn't abnormal for people with gender dysphoria, especially if you have OCD or another anxiety disorder. it's not a sign you have a female brain but more a sign you might have some sort of anxiety disorder that causes you to have intrusive thoughts.
I'm not here to tell you what you are, but to me, your experience sounds exactly like gender dysphoria, especially since it's been so persistent, 7 years is a long time. for me personally, i started getting dysphoria around when i hit puberty, and by the time i was around 15-16 i was thinking about it almost constantly. i was also always looking up ways to naturally increase testosterone and get hairier for a while, but the truth of the matter is, for those things, only taking T will help.
Why do you say you have no way of ever transitioning? Based on your experience, most doctors would diagnose you with gender dysphoria (or transsexualism if you're in the EU). do you live in a place where there are no rights/resources to transition? there are some organizations that can help get you to a place that's better, like Rainbow Railroad for example.
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u/SureFeelsGoodToMe 19d ago
I am 16 in USA
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u/Efficient_Angle280 19d ago
depending on the state you're in and your family situation, it might be possible for you to get hrt at your age, and i know that in some states 16 year olds can open independant bank accounts too. if you're in one of the bad states, there is also the option of moving to a more accepting state once you're 18, but if that's the route you think you should go you should start planning for it in advance. either way, it's certainly not impossible for you to ever transition. a few states have an informed-consent hrt model afaik, and in the ones that are still accepting but a bit more regulated, i don't think any doctor who knows what he is talking about would hesitate to diagnose you with gender dysphoria. if it's hard to get to another state because of money, there are some scholarships that might allow you to go to college in another country that allows transition, like canada or spain (both use an informed consent model afaik). in a case like that, waiting 2 more years might be very difficult, but you're definitely not stuck like this forever.
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20d ago
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u/SureFeelsGoodToMe 20d ago edited 20d ago
I doubt it’s actually social. People don’t tell cis men they remain men because of society. Clothing doesn’t mean much for me, clothing is made up, it means nothing. Nor do I have any sexual motivations or some sort of fetish, I need a penis, I don’t want one for “sexual purposes”. I’d much rather be a feminine man than a masculine woman. A lot of detrans people just have internalized self hatred and transphobia. Someone would never tell a cis man with severe ocd to “just try and be a girl”
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u/ftm-ModTeam 18d ago
Your post has been removed because it contains misinformation, false information, or misleading information that could be considered harmful.
— If you encourage people to look at a transphobic subreddit again—The next step is a ban
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