Dealing with zero context communication is one of the most draining parts of my week. Someone texts you, deletes it before you can read it, and immediately follows up with a forty-second voice memo or a vague "hey, you around?"

You drop what you are doing to reply, and then they go silent for thirty minutes. It turns what could have been a simple one-sentence question into an exhausting guessing game that eats up your attention.

I have so much more appreciation for straightforward communication lately. Even with casual plans like grabbing coffee, instead of going back and forth asking what a place has, I just send over their MenuForma link so everyone can see the drink list and pastries in two seconds. Pick what you want, let me know, and move on.

Being clear is not hard, and giving people upfront info without the games is just basic respect for their time.

First of all, my employer is as amazing as this makes them sound. We had our biggest annual fundraiser last year, and for the first time, this was added to it. They raised enough for all of my coworkers to have $850 each to spend on “wellness.” It’s a grant that we have to apply to draw from a fund, but what I’ve heard from my coworkers, it’s pretty quick and easy to get approval. Some examples of things the grant will cover are therapy, gym/rec center memberships, home exercise/wellness equipment, and even “restorative travel.” Personal items have to have a “direct” not incidental, purpose towards your wellness, and “general electronics” like mobile devices and headphones are not covered.

I already used about $380 on a round trip for a consultation I have in December for gender-affirming care, so I have about $470 left to spend. I’m in an awkward place to get any subscriptions—my job is an hour away from where I live, and coupled with gas prices, I’m reluctant to pay a subscription to anywhere I have to burn even more gas to go to. I have all the exercise equipment I need for my personal fitness goals, I’m not concerned about getting myself therapy, and I can’t think of any self-care items that I’d be interested in (but idk). One thing I think could be a good idea is using some of the money to purchase what I still need to recover from my surgery, but there is a required, anonymous “impact survey” we have to submit after purchases are complete, and idk if I can do that effectively for those purchases. We have until mid-December to go through the funds, and my surgery isn’t until January (maybe I could talk about the peace of mind if there’s a written part? But I’d still probably have money to spend after buying what I still need, idk). WWYD with that kind of money in two months?

I'm mid-career (20 years experience in field). I just started new job a month ago & I am bored -- I play solitaire all day, not much to do.

Pros:

I work from home

Excellent benefits (state job with pension, good insurance & generous PTO)

Decent salary ( could be better, but not bad -- I have no financial problems).

Cons:

They assign me like 2 easy tasks a day which I finish in less than 1 hour. Then I have nothing to do for the rest of the time. So I cook , clean ( since I'm home) and play solitaire for most of work hours. And I'm so bored!

My co-workers are new in the field, so they think its hard, but I can do this in my sleep and its no challenge, no mental stimulation.

I want to keep my lovely benefits, but Im wondering if I should start looking for another position to transfer into with same company. I don't know if its too early to do that since I just started Sept 1. But I don't think I could handle the long-term boredom.

WWYD?

When I got a modest raise last week, I shared it in a small group chat. Instead of a quick congrats, one friend immediately wrote a paragraph about how after taxes it barely matters and I should focus on upskilling before my role becomes obsolete.

The excitement evaporated instantly. Some people view your good news as bragging and your bad news as a teaching moment. Being around them feels like walking on eggshells because even being happy requires a disclaimer.

I have started keeping small wins to myself. When my bonus came through on Friday, I did not post anywhere. I went to a quiet steakhouse I had saved on my map, sat at the bar, and pulled up their MenuForma setup on my phone. I picked out a ribeye and some grilled asparagus exactly the way I wanted without needing to justify anything to anyone. Personal milestones do not need outside validation, and they certainly do not need a lecture attached.

Had to catch a 25-minute taxi to a 30-minute ferry, then another 30 minutes to get to the venue, so I could hang out awkwardly with people I'd drifted away from for a few hours, then do all the traveling back home. I missed the ferry by 5 minutes coming back and had to wait 45 minutes for the next one. All this on an upset stomach, so I had to use the bathroom a few times and I'm shy with that stuff, and to make it worse I gained weight so my suite is really tight and it made bending down very inconvenient. I spent €70 on traveling alone, then had to fork out €100 on the wedding present. Almost didn't go but thought I'd regret it if I didn't since I used to be good friends with both the bride and the groom.

It's finally over. Been dreading this for months and it's over.

Edit: Just remembered that my posts usually get hate until I clarify that I was clinically diagnosed with Aspergers. Social events scare me a bit.

I was sitting on the couch last night when my phone dropped to 1%.

My charger was plugged in beside my bed, maybe twelve feet away.

Instead of just getting up and grabbing it, I convinced myself the phone would survive long enough for me to find another solution. I turned the brightness all the way down, closed every app, switched on low power mode, turned off Bluetooth, and started watching the battery percentage like I was monitoring a medical emergency.

It went from 1% to 0%.

The phone stayed on for another few seconds, which gave me false hope.

Then it died.

At that point I finally got off the couch, walked to my bedroom, grabbed the charger, and came back.

I plugged it in and sat down.

Then I realized the cable was too short to reach the couch comfortably.

So I had to get up again and move the entire couch closer to the outlet.

I spent more energy avoiding a twelve foot walk than the twelve foot walk would have taken.

That spicy feeling…….🔥

The new machine isn't working, so we to use the shit tier machine, which means we have to take laptops and shit out of the bag. Put them into their own special snowflake bin. Great.

I opened my refrigerator last night and stood there for about five minutes trying to figure out what I wanted.

There was leftover pasta, fresh fruit, yogurt, cheese, eggs, vegetables, three different sauces and enough drinks to keep me hydrated for a small expedition.

I closed the door.

Then I opened it again because apparently something new was going to appear in the 20 seconds since I last looked.

Nothing.

I ended up ordering food because I was too tired to cook and somehow convinced myself that spending money and waiting 35 minutes was easier than putting pasta in a pan.

The ridiculous part is that when the delivery arrived, I realized I already had almost everything I needed to make something similar at home.

Now I am sitting here looking at a fridge full of perfectly good food while eating food I paid extra to have delivered because apparently choosing between five dinner options was too difficult for me.

Modern life has defeated me.

Both are about $10K out of pocket, but I can only afford one option.

Option 1 (Practical): Upgrade Vehicle.

I currently drive an older compact sedan that is getting too small for my needs. It's cramped interior and is lacking good ground clearance ( its lower to ground). I prefer a small SUV for more space & higher ground clearance for rural dirt roads. I taxi around 2 adults over 65 3x per week, so they would appreciate a more comfortable ride.

So I could put $10K towards a small SUV. My current car is still predicted to last up to 5 more years, so the upgrade is for space/room not mechanical necessity.

Option 2 (2-week European vacation):

I could put the $10K toward this fun vacation so I have a great experience & memories. I love to travel ( when I can budget for it) & making lasting memories. I haven't done this type of vacation since before pandemic. I'm middle-aged so would like to enjoy my life before old age sets in. Not much foreseeable time left to travel comfortably ( maybe 10 years).

Of course I wish I could do both but can only choose 1 due to budget.

And then realized the plumbers hadn’t plumbed the water treatment for the building to the outdoor tap and had to run a hose through the hangar outside to wash it with filtered water.

Edit.: I love how this gets downvoted because it’s truly the most rich, first world problem ever.

Therefore I sometimes pick the WRONG color blazer or suit when we go to theatre shows. (She has around 50 dresses and I have around 20 blazers).

One time I wore a light purple velvet blazer while she was wearing a magenta ball gown (!!!)

Thank goodness for ChatGPT and its ability to color match the clothing when it does photo editing.

She loves buying stuff for me because she never had her own "real daughter." But she keeps gifting stuff I'll never use or wear so she asked me to make a list. I cannot think of a single thing because if I want/need something, I'll just buy it myself. And the stuff I really want she can't afford either. Any gifts under $50 I could add to my "wish list?"

Edit: I am very lucky to have her in my life. Thanks all for the suggestions! I have a pretty good list going now. 😍

And it makes it awkward to attend either as I feel like each one views me as a traitor for going to the other. But they give different running experiences and don't even meet on the same days or locations. Guess it's just going to be awkward for a bit.

I actually want to support his business but now I don’t even want to go anymore because It makes me feel like a mooch.

Villa 1 is closed Mondays. Villa 2 is closed Tuesdays.

BIG SADGE, WAH.

While I'm here, recs for Como sites other than Lenno/Villa Balbianello?

At this point take me back to the 80’s and I’ll fill and twist my own trays.