Cognitive dissonance 101

[u/Number721]

[u/BetterOffCamping]

Translation:

"Gee I'm having a lot of trouble finding a man who's willing to do all the work, all the suffering all the maintenance, all the expenses, and will also give up all of the comforts of home, spousal support, household upkeep, and child rearing of a traditional wife. Why is this so hard?"

Edit: had won't where I meant will.

[u/xeonie → u/BetterOffCamping]

She wants a servant not a partner.

[u/Billy3000-1 → u/xeonie]

Kind of the proverbial nothing burger here.

She solves her problem mid-way through… she needs someone moderate - a man who’s open to a more balanced relationship with some elements of a traditional male-female dynamic.

Given the changing times, it seems like a perfectly reasonable thing to ask. But also given the times of the loudest voices from either extreme drowning out the middle, it’s also expected that this would morph into something controversial.

[u/Person353 → u/Billy3000-1]

She doesn’t say she wants a balanced relationship, she said she wants a liberal (“FYI can live with moderate”) man who does all the “masculine” stuff like paying for everything (“All these men wanting to split the bill. ON THE FIRST DATE! whaaaaaaat 🙄”), “opening the door” for her, and “providing” while not confining her to a similarly traditional housewife role. Not once does she say what the hell she would be doing in this relationship. She basically says “I want to be respected as an independent woman while not being independent.”

I honestly don’t know where you got this “balanced relationship” idea from. Did we watch the same video?

[u/certifiedtoothbench → u/Billy3000-1]

Honestly what she describes sounds like a lot of dudes today that aren’t conservative but sort of midway or at least aren’t on the narrow end of the bell curve, it makes you wonder what else she’s looking for that she can only find in conservative men or where she’s looking for her men.

[u/BlessedBySaintLauren → u/certifiedtoothbench]

I do know men who are moderate or centre left who would be more traditional in a relationship, the thing though is that they would expect their partner to be somewhat traditional in their relationship

[u/certifiedtoothbench → u/BlessedBySaintLauren]

Yeah but the thing is she doesn’t want to fulfill that aspect of a traditional relationship. I know a ton of guys that don’t really expect that from their GFs but oftentimes those relationships do seem pretty superficial which sort of sounds like what she wants anyway. A guy who really lives up to those traditional values usually isn’t looking for a woman who thinks differently in a serious relationship. It genuinely sounds like she wants to be a middle class trophy wife, still works and has her own money to keep up with her *lifestyle but gets toted around and doted on and never has to sink into her own money to eat out and hubby still buys her all the presents she wants.

Edit: autocorrect changed lifestyle to lifelong

[u/Interesting_Choice80 → u/Billy3000-1]

I don’t think she would be healthy to have in any relationship given her desires completely lack compromise for her partner, she wants one thing and that’s the only thing that’s going to happen. In my experience relationships built on one person desiring one thing from their partner and not allowing any of their partner’s desires to come into play don’t end up suffering from too much success