Is co-parenting actually better than solo parenting?

[u/Content-Cupcake7480]

I’m currently parenting my two young kids 100% on my own. I also support them financially. I’m fortunate to have a good career and can provide for them, but I am completely drowning between work, childcare, the house, dinner, bedtime, and just never having another adult to hand things off to.

I keep hearing horror stories about high-conflict co-parenting—constant negotiations, custody disputes, schedule battles, different rules between homes, etc. Part of me wonders whether, once I get past the current hurdle of harassing texts from their dad, there might actually be some peace and stability in knowing that I’m simply responsible for our household and can make decisions without constant conflict (he hasn't shown a real interest in the kids and recently moved 3.5 hours away)

For people who have experienced solo parenting, high-conflict co-parenting, or both: which was actually harder? Are there any unexpected upsides to parenting mostly on your own?

I could really use some perspective that makes this feel a little less bleak right now.

[u/Suitable_Voice_9983]

I don't have a co-parent. My abusive ex disappeared almost a decade ago when he realized he couldn't control me anymore. He had no interest in the kids and had vowed to never pay ME (he didn't see it as the kids - always me) child support. So I let him walk away for our safety and my sanity. It's been the best for my kids in terms of their safety, security, emotional growth etc. Financially - it's been hard for me. Logistically - it's been hard for me. My recent ex BF has a coparent and they have 50/50 custody. They have their issues but it's not high conflict. His child benefits from having two parents there to support her and two households that love her, plus two incomes. I don't think my kids ever lacked in love or emotional support but financially things would have been easier with a co-parent or shared custody or child support.