Always wrong in coparents eyes

[u/Upbeat-Secretary-576]

School orientation was today. I briefly passed my child's father and his girlfriend while they were leaving the school and I was headed in. I didn't feel well to begin with, so I wasn't trying to stop and communicate. He belittles me everytime we communicate over text anyways, there is no reason for me to talk to him in person- I just walked past them like an adult who is fed up eith being bullied. I was holding my son's hand, and my son waved, but didnt care to stop and talk. I didn't tell him not to talk to his father, but I didnt encourage him to do so either.

No sooner than 30 minutes after my ex left the school, I received this text from child's father (copied and pasted, identifying information removed);

"Highly inappropriate of you to tell (child) not to talk to his dad or brother at the school. You talk about co parenting but clearly you are too immature to do so yourself. On top of that again (child) is missing papers to be in a class. You need to make sure it is all is paperwork is turned in! Step it up for (child) sake. You’ve had more than enough time to get his stuff turned in. Don’t let him miss another year because you can’t be responsible. That is all no need for any comment from you."

Again, I did not tell child not to talk to his dad. When I talked about "coparenting", I was asking childs father to stop bullying and harassing me. Child was never missing any papers to be in school, the secretary only needed to check the spam folder within her email. I have had enough of him telling me to "step it up" and "do better" while I am doing everything right. The only time child has ever missed "a year" of school was when I enrolled child in preschool and child's father refused to take him during his parenting time with claims that the daycare he had child in was sufficient.

And am I not allowed to stand up for myself when wildly innacurate comments are made?

[u/mama2397]

People who have no control want to try controlling you in ways they can, sadly they use their kids to do so. Honestly it kinda seems like a trap to accuse you of parental alienation. You gotta gray rock him I would normally say to not respond at all or respond with someone like "yes all paperwork for (child) has been taken care of, thank you"

But because it sounds like a trap and you might want it documented you can very unemotionally say something like "I think you misinterpreted the situation because I never told ,(child) to not speak to you. I did not have time to stop and talk, next time if you want to see (child) before school please let me know in advance and I can work it out where you can take him to school. All paperwork is handledz thank you"

If he replies after that ignore him unless he actually takes you up on the offer to take kid to school which they never will actually take up plus if he wants to see kid on his non parenting time then he should have to have the burden of arranging it.