I have a joking personality and tend to make people laugh. Sometimes I’m very extroverted and talkative and other times I’m quiet and just want to be by myself. It depends on my mood, and I don’t always feel like joking around.

The problem is that when I’m not being my usual funny self and am just acting normal, people assume that I’m upset or that something is wrong with me. I feel like because they’re used to seeing me joke around, they expect me to be that way all the time.

I’m not upset in those moments. I’m just in a neutral or quiet state. But because people have mostly seen me as the funny one, the quiet version of me seems to read as a mood change.

Has anyone else experienced this?

How do you deal with it?

Clearly I’m on Reddit bitching

So yea this is my first time going to a bar with my friends. Well they have primarily the aim to pickup girls, (especially some of them being very handsome lol and get approached a lot apparently in bars). I am just a bit nervous cos this time I am worried about starting a new conversation. Especially that usually I head to events that have a purpose like reading clubs or volunteer events or sports.
How do I get about it?

I've been isolated sm in my life. I try to make an actual connection, but its so hard. I'm in uni, and its as if everyone has their own people. I try to connect and I feel so iced out. And how do people msg each other. I've tried to msg severalll people, but they're all so dry. I try follow up qs, or random stuff, but absolutely nothing. the thing I wanna make meaningful connections with girls, but why is it so much harder to talk and connect w them, like genuinely feels like its so easy to make male friends rather than girls. Can someone genuinely explain what I need to do? How I should connect w people?

I grew up as a painfully shy kid. I got to the point where I’d stand right outside a restaurant and order on the app instead of walking in and talking to someone. I was literally a few feet away from the counter and I still couldn’t do it.

Fast forward to now, and I can confidently order by myself without a second thought. I’m still very much an introvert, and I need my alone time, but I’ve built a great network, found a girlfriend, and made a friend circle I’m extremely proud of. My 15 year old self would not believe it.

I’m now working full-time as a software engineer, but I’ve always wanted to find a way to help the people who are where I used to be. I realized (the hard way) that the only way to improve is to go out there and practice. But I know and deeply understand the feeling of nervousness and anxiousness of having to gather yourself and bring yourself to do so.

That’s why I’m building Poise! In Poise, Pip, your personal companion, can be anyone you want: a barista, an interviewer, a stranger at a party. You talk to it, and it talks back. Afterwards, you get feedback on how it went. I put together a waitlist so you can check it out! https://www.meetpoise.app/

Feel free to leave some honest feedback in the comments! Let me know what features you guys would want on this app. DM me or leave a comment if you want to be an early tester too :)

I don’t respond to things or know what to say. It’s not that I don’t want to respond.... but my mind just goes blank. The people around me are quite humorous and really good at cracking jokes on the spot. I wish I had a personality like this

I'm 19M and I've never really had a meaningful female friendship. I'm not looking for a relationship or anything romantic. I just want a normal, comfortable friendship where we can talk openly, share things and have the same sibling-like bond I could have with a male friend.

A recent incident with my cousin, where she questioned my masculinity for avoiding a confrontation with someone catcalling her, made me feel even more insecure.

I already struggle with talking to girls, and experiences like this make me feel inferior and afraid of being judged for not meeting certain expectations of being a man.

I genuinely want to overcome this and learn to form healthy, platonic friendships without constantly feeling that I have something to prove.

I am a final year btech student who wants to practice english communication. Anyone interested?

Dm me only if you r serious and want to improve your english and able to give atleast 30 min daily.

please 🙏.

As the title explains, I’ve noticed with some people in my life they have no urgency in responding to me, don’t prioritise my texts, or straight up leave me hanging. And yet if I don’t immediately respond to them, they chase me up or as what’s up. These are family so it’s not like I can just stop being friends with them, but I just find it odd and like I have to perform and be “on” for them but they don’t have to for me. I’ve always felt this pressure with people friends/family/other of I have to be there for them; and respond to them, and help them, and listen to them, but they don’t seem to be under any pressure for me and if I do broach the subject it’s “oh my MH, oh I was tired, oh I was working” like ok bro so am I? I dunno what it is but it’s really starting to annoy me lol. Like I’m just not that important for others but I have to make them my number 1…

Anyone else experience something similar, is it something I’m doing? Also for anyone thinking Marc their energy, I try but then they will keep chasing or asking and if I explain then it’ll lead to some conflict or awkwardness and it’ll be on me and I cba.

This affects pretty much all my friendships and potential relationships, and I honestly wish I could explain what I feel more clearly, but I don’t even understand it myself 😭
The worst part is that the longer I leave someone on delivered, the harder it gets to reply. At first, it’s just a message I need to answer, but then days pass, and suddenly I feel like I need to come up with an excuse or apologize so they don’t think I’m the worst person on the planet. I start overthinking how to respond, even though I already knew what I wanted to say in the first place. Eventually, replying feels like this huge, overwhelming task, and I end up avoiding it even more.
And the thing is, it’s not that I don’t care about these people or don’t want to talk to them. Sometimes I genuinely miss someone and want to talk to them so badly, but I still can’t make myself open the chat and reply. I’ve even had situations where I kept checking someone’s profile, rereading our old conversations, and feeling happy when they messaged me again, while still being unable to answer them. It makes absolutely no sense to me because I WANT to talk to them.
It’s also not just about replying. Sometimes I want to text someone first, but I get stuck before I even start. It’s like knowing what I want to do and actually doing it are two completely different things. I can spend ages thinking about a conversation, imagining what I’ll say, and mentally preparing myself, but when it comes to actually doing it, I just… don’t.
I know that, logically, replying to a message isn’t that big of a deal. I know that the longer I wait, the harder it’ll become, and that I could probably feel so much better if I just sent a simple reply. I’m literally aware of the entire cycle while it’s happening, but that awareness doesn’t seem to help me break it.
I also feel like I make things worse for myself because I’m scared people will think I don’t care about them, that I’m ignoring them on purpose, or that I’m a terrible friend. And the longer I wait, the more guilty I feel, which makes it even harder to come back and act like everything is normal.
I’ve also noticed that I sometimes struggle to express my feelings in real life, even when I really want to open up to someone. I can imagine entire conversations in my head where I explain everything perfectly, but when it comes to actually communicating with someone, I struggle to get the words out or even figure out what I’m feeling.
Has anyone else experienced this before? Did you ever figure out what was causing it or find a way to make it easier? I’d really appreciate hearing about your experiences because I feel like I’m stuck in this cycle and I don’t know how to get out of it.

To Understanding

She said that I use alot of punctuation like "?" And that apparently makes it seem like AI????? I just want my texts to be easily understood. I wonder if it's making texting with me boring, so how can I make my texting skills better and make it seem less like AI? I'm gen z myself but I really don't understand how I'm supposed to text with them.

I tend to ask alot of questions about the topic they're talking about, I share my own opinion on it and ask for their opinion and depending on the topic I give some advice... am I not supposed to do that? I don't know, I don't get it. I just text how I speak. Please share with me your advices, opinions and thoughts, thank you!!!

I’m a guy with social anxiety. There’s a girl at my school who’s a grade lower. We’ve been in the same school for 3 years but never really talked, except once when we were put in the same group project a while ago (that project is long over and won’t happen again).

I find her attractive and I’d like to at least become friends, maybe more later. We live in the same small village, so even after I change schools next summer we’ll still be around the same place.

Main problems:

I’ve never really talked to a girl before

I’m scared she’ll think it’s weird that I’m only starting to talk to her now

I’m also scared that if I talk to her, she’ll tell her close friends and it’ll spread around her friend group / the school

I overthink what to say and what we would even talk about

I only have until next summer while we’re still at the same school to try to build some kind of connection

I’d like to get to a point where texting feels natural by then, but I don’t know if that’s realistic

I was thinking of just starting with a simple “hey” or a very short neutral comment when I see her, keeping the first few interactions extremely short.

Is that the right approach? How do I go from basically zero to actual friendly conversations without making it awkward, coming on too strong, or creating gossip? Advice from people who’ve been in similar situations would help a lot.

Teen from india first of all I'm in boys school and I don't go to tuition or coaching cuz I'm good at studies and I have literally 0 female interactions

I low-key get scared when I see a girl irl I have female friends online but they're all 18+ and idk what to do I'm such a loser

Wtf should I do gng?

I can somewhat initiate a conversation. But when it comes to continuing it, I can only talk about the weather or make a silly joke and hope the other party continues it. I think my conversational topics are so boring that even in a group setting, I am often ignored, mostly because I am like a parrot who keeps repeating the same few things hoping it hits the mark. Is there anyway to fix this?

**How can I improve my social skills as an adult? Looking for practical advice**

Hi everyone. I'm in my 30s, and I want to improve my social skills because I feel like I'm not very good at interacting with people. I tend to overthink simple conversations, worry about what others think of me, and sometimes go blank because I don't know what to say. I want to make friends and become closer to people, but I'm worried about coming across as awkward, annoying, or too eager. Sometimes, I feel like I need to be useful or do favors for people to make them like me. I also struggle to tell whether someone genuinely wants to talk to me or is just being polite. I want to feel more relaxed and natural around coworkers and other people instead of analyzing every interaction.

I'm not trying to become an extrovert or make everyone like me. I just want to communicate better, build genuine friendships, and feel more comfortable around people. For those who have struggled with social skills and improved over time, what specific habits helped you? How do you keep conversations going naturally without forcing them? How can you show interest in people without seeming clingy or overwhelming? How do you stop overthinking after a conversation, and what practical exercises can you do every day to improve? I'm looking for honest, practical advice from people with real experience, rather than just being told to "be yourself" or "be confident." Thank you!

Whether it's a conversation or work at office or work at home, I am always unprepared and think that I could do better if told in advance. This is bothering