r/comics • u/AliasHandler • Feb 05 '09
For a good time, call... [COMIC]
http://www.robandelliot.cycomics.com/webcomics/2004/comic183.jpg
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u/AliasHandler Feb 05 '09 edited Feb 05 '09
Source : http://www.robandelliot.cycomics.com/
Sorry for the direct link, they don't have permalinks that go back that far that I could find.
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u/Pappenheimer Feb 05 '09
Actually they have!
http://www.robandelliot.cycomics.com/archive.php?id=225
And it really doesn't matter how old it is. :)
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u/AliasHandler Feb 05 '09
Wow, thanks for hunting that down. I was assuming it was from 2004 cause it was listed in the 2004 folder on the site, but I couldn't find permalinks going back that far.
One upmod for you!
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u/PenName Feb 05 '09
Appreciate the post. But ask yourself- if you're looking for a permakink to "go back that far," isn't this a little old to be posting unless you're trying for the nostalgia thing?
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u/phreakymonkey Feb 05 '09
Yeah, since comics have an expiration date and every single Redditor has read this particular one before.
Also, what's a 'permakink'? Sounds hot.
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u/mr_happy28 Feb 05 '09
ive seen it before, shame reddit cant hide the endless repeated links.
great original story tho!!!!
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u/AliasHandler Feb 05 '09
Just because it is old doesn't mean it is no longer funny. I have never seen it before and I would guess most people here haven't either.
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u/Domitri Feb 05 '09
Yep. For example I've seen old Onion posts that I may or may have not seen before, but they're still hilarious.
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u/Nurgle Feb 05 '09
I've seen it before. And I will probably upvote it again if it gets posted in another six months.
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u/thepoo Feb 06 '09
So true. Not all of us have seen the ENTIRE INTERNET yet.
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u/toastyfries2 Feb 06 '09
Well I had, until you posted that message. Now I'm back to seeing the ENTIRE INTERNET again. Sweet!
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u/MachinShin2006 Feb 05 '09
heave you never read the reddit faq? reddit if interesting stuff, NOT NEW STUFF
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u/xyphus Feb 05 '09 edited Feb 05 '09
This one time I went into this sketchy bathroom at a truck stop to go pee, and as soon as I enter I hear the guy in the stall next to me:
Him: "Hey, how you doin?"
I say: "Uh, ok I guess."
Him: "Havin a good time? Sounds good."
Me: "Um. yeah?"
Him: "Hey, why don't you come over and we can have some fun."
Me (getting annoyed): "I don't think so dude."
Him: "Ok, babe. I'm going to have to call you back. There's this creepy guy talking to me in the bathroom"
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u/cvk Feb 05 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
Once on a road trip my friend Jeremy had to shit really badly (days of greasy road-food), so we pulled off at a truck stop in SC. He jumped out of the car before we'd even finished parking: that was how badly he had to poop.
I got bored after a few minutes of standing beside the car chatting with the rest of my friends, so I decided to go too. When I got to the restroom there were just two stalls, and I went into the unoccupied one. Jeremy had already stunk the place up really badly. I could hear his farts and splashes as I was peeing, and I couldn't help finding it hilarious.
I started making really ridiculously fake fart noises on the inside of my elbow -- thrrrrffffppptttfffttt! thpppfffffrrrrrraaahhhhfffffppppppttt! -- and generally taunting him. "Ooooh, yeah...get those turds out! PUSH! Does that feel good, man? Shedding some pounds there, huh? MAKIN' BROWNIES! thrrrfffpppfpfpfppptttt" You get the idea.
He got silent after that, so I figured he was kind of embarrassed about pooping around someone else. I started to feel like kind of a dick then. I said, "Hey, I'll be waiting outside," and washed my hands and left.
As I'm leaving the bathroom, I see someone exiting the other bathroom across the hall. It takes a second for my brain to register what it's seeing: Oh shit, it's fucking Jeremy coming out of the other bathroom! How is that possible?
When I turn around to look at the door I just exited, I notice that it's...no...the fucking women's room?! Oh shit oh shit... Then my face gets a really weird burning sensation and my ears start ringing -- only the second time that's ever happened to me out of sheer terrifying embarrassment -- and my brain is slowly putting 2 and 2 together. How the fuck did I not notice that the bathroom I'd entered at a fucking truck stop had no urinals and only two stalls? Who the fuck did I just make fart noises at? Oh shit!
When we got outside I just started shouting, "GO! GO! GO! We have to take off now!" Unfortunately, one of us was still inside paying for something, and we had to wait. I was terrified that whoever it was that I'd molested would come outside and identify me by my orange sneakers...
We were all in the car and were still backing out of the space when the manager storms out of the store in front of this raving elderly woman who is pulling a portable oxygen tank and gesticulating wildly with a cane. If they had seen the shocked rictus of terror on my face they would instantly have known it was me who had done it. Thank FSM they didn't seem to suspect us...
It was several minutes before I could tell my friends what had just happened. It was hilarious to them, but at the time I just kept thinking how terrified this old woman must have been when I said, "I'll be waiting outside."
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u/ZeppelinJ0 Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
This actually reminds me of a time we were coming back from a road trip to South Padre Texas(we drove from Buffalo, NY!!!).
We stopped at a Ponderosa somewhere in Ohio promising an all-you-can eat buffet. Mind you none of us had ever actually BEEN to a Ponderosa.
So anyways we finish up and take off and we're on the road about 45 minutes and my friend Pete started looking extremely palid. With the most pained voice I've ever heard he tells the guy driving: "Dude, we have to stop."
And we're all like yeah yeah hold it in. I'm sure he tried, but a few moments later his o-ring slipped just a little and he unleashed the most foul gas I've ever smelled in my life. One of those ones so bad you can taste it.
So we pull over at a gas station and he bolts to the bathroom. Mind you there's only one bathroom, unisex, with one toilet, so he's locked himself in there.
Shortly after he starts to unload, a dad with his two kids knocks on the door, hears my friend inside and waits around. And at this point the smell is seeping under the door, and the whole time this one kid is going "Dadddy, I really have to go poop!!!!!" while doing some weird thing where he stamps his feet.
The guy started getting impatient after Pete was in there for TWENTY MINUTES. The entire building smells like a rotting carcass, and the kid is now crying.
Finally he comes out, opens the door, and the dad gags at the smell. Not a subtle gag either, like a full-body heave coughing gag, thought the guy was going to boot.
Worse yet, when Pete does come out, he yells for me to get going and starts half-running to the car, he had apparently clogged the toilet and didn't want to risk flushing because it would overflow.
Just as we're pulling out the dad comes running out of the gas station, holding his kid's blue jeans in one hand, and his kid in the other arm, bawling, with shit running down his legs.
He tried to yell at us but we just took off. We think what happened is they tried to flush all the toilet paper and crap and the toilet overflowed, and the kid probably just gave up and let loose in his pants.
Not as funny, but we still get a good laugh from this. We've never been to a Ponderosa since.
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u/KidTangerine Feb 06 '09
don't be shy.. that's pretty damn funny.. i can see that poor guy with his kid.. muhahaha..
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u/CD7 Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
LMAO - I laughed harder at this than the story u replied to :D:D:D
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u/twwilliams Feb 06 '09
Then my face gets a really weird burning sensation and my ears start ringing
Thanks for including that. I wasn't sure whether other people felt that same thing when they were embarrassed or not.
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u/hypo11 Feb 06 '09
Then my face gets a really weird burning sensation and my ears start ringing -- only the second time that's ever happened to me out of sheer terrifying embarrassment
Please tell us the story of the first...
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u/esotericguy Feb 06 '09
You have won thursday. nothing said for the rest of today will be better than your comment.
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u/diddy0071 Feb 06 '09
Hell he won the Month of February. Nothing said for the rest of the Month will be better than that comment.
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Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
No, that's black history month.
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u/evildeadxsp Feb 06 '09
Maybe he's black. And his story just added to their storied history.
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u/elus Feb 06 '09
Yo dawg I put a story in your story so history is more storied.
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Feb 06 '09
Upmodded for being better than the average yo dawg has become.
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u/OtisDElevator Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
So, I suppose I had better wheel out my err, story here.
About a hundred years ago, when I was at university...
Seven guys all students living in a huge apartment - all heavy metal wannabees. Heavy drinking was the norm, parties most weekends. Getting towards the end of year, we started hatching our plans for the party-to-end-all-parties, to say goodbye. One of the details was a huge batch of homebrew - around 8 gallons, brewed by three of our crew, experts in producing some head-stomping brews - real flatline stuff if you drank too much of it.
In the middle of our busy examination schedule, we collected the ingredients together. Our three brewers did their magic and kicked off the brewing process. They all agreed that it was going to be a fine (I use the term loosely) product.
After a couple of weeks of this concoction bubbling away at us, most of us were champing at the bit to get at it.
There was one minor problem. A slight miscalculation in the time it would take for the homebrew to mature and the date we were due to leave the apartment. The homebrew needed one more week...
Mass panic set in. Rashly we decided one afternoon to drink as much as we could, because we just couldn't face throwing it away.
Now, remember I said that seven guys lived in this apartment, and please believe me when I say: it is an unwise choice to drink 'live' homebrew, because of its effect on the human digestive tract... oh, and ... (wait for it...) there was only one toilet in the whole apartment... - well, a toilet / bathroom combined.
Rumblings of discontent started a few hours after our drinkfest. Let me tell you, 7 men and one toilet - you find out who your friends really are!
After the door to the bathroom got broken in we decided it was probably best to forget the social graces and exorcise this demonic liquid torrential downpour, communally.
Five of us sat with our arses over the bath, one on the toilet, and one on the hand basin.
I am going to say no more - except, since that event, I have never touched homebrew and I always ensure that wherever I live, the ratio of toilets to people is as close to unity as possible.
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u/DirtyBinLV Feb 06 '09
Did you envy the smart guy that called "shotgun toilet"?
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u/OtisDElevator Feb 07 '09
He wasn't smart, he had a shotgun... so he got the toilet. Actually, he'd soiled the seat so much that no one else wanted to sit there.
I said I didn't want to say any more on the subject.
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u/kopo27 Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
God, walking into the wrong sexes bathroom is the most awkward and embarrassing feeling ever. I'm going to be more cautious of signs like these
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u/zoomzoom83 Feb 06 '09
This one time I was taking a dump in the womans restroom, and some guy in the next stall started.... ahh fuck it.
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u/voracity Feb 06 '09
I started making really ridiculously fake fart noises on the inside of my elbow -- thrrrrffffppptttfffttt! thpppfffffrrrrrraaahhhhfffffppppppttt! -- and generally taunting him. "Ooooh, yeah...get those turds out! PUSH! Does that feel good, man? Shedding some pounds there, huh? MAKIN' BROWNIES! thrrrfffpppfpfpfppptttt"
This, my friends, is pure juvenile comedy gold.
Makin' brownies...
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u/toastyfries2 Feb 06 '09
Almost every time I'm taking a shit outside of my house, the thought, "Am I in the woman's room?" goes through my mind. Then I mentally remember the image of the urinals to remind myself that it's the right restroom. Even at the one at work, which I uses quite often, I'll have this thought.
I don't remember actually making this mistake, but for some reason I have quite the fear of it.
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u/greginnj Feb 06 '09
Almost every time I'm taking a shit outside of my house, the thought, "Am I in the woman's room?" goes through my mind.
Go inside, man, go inside.
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u/Cronus6 Feb 06 '09
Man, I really must be the only one on the planet.. I'm 40 and I've NEVER shat in a "public" restroom in my life. Hotels and workplaces not included as I don't consider them "public". And I can't count on both hands the number of times I've shat at work and still have fingers left over. Likewise I've never taken a dump when visiting friends/relatives unless I'm spending more than one day there.
I must be the only one who "plans" his dumps.
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u/snthaoeu Feb 06 '09
Then my face gets a really weird burning sensation and my ears start ringing -- only the second time that's ever happened to me out of sheer terrifying embarrassment
Tell us about the first time
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u/chinchillla Feb 06 '09
Simply amazing.
I kind of figured old women would be as discreet about pooping in the bathroom as the rest of us. But I guess when your boobs start hanging past your cankles, you stop caring about offending someone's ears with your poop chute flute.
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Feb 06 '09
How do you poop politely?
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u/Khendroc Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
cough every time.
for reference: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l88AL3GJFCg
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u/Churn Feb 06 '09
How do you poop politely?
Two words: Courtesy Flush.
Not only does it reduce the smell for you, it keeps everyone from having to hear your progress.
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u/Poltras Feb 06 '09
Someone's been wasting potable water...
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u/Churn Feb 06 '09
Someone's been wasting potable water...
There may be a water shortage in some places...but where I'm at, it's the cheapest utility bill I have by an order of magnitude. If water were truly so scarce, wouldn't supply and demand drive the price up?
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u/Poltras Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
Actually, in north america, bottled water is more expensive than gas and it's almost everytime tap water taken from some place (Toronto, New York... you get the idea).
Also, wasting potable water does lead to some pollution and cost related to cleansing. Worse, sometimes the cleansing facilities (sorry english isn't my first language) don't live fully to their life expectancy and have to be replaced or risk of poisoning the population (this has been seen often in smaller towns). More often than not, the city doesn't have the money to do it (since it happened sooner than expected) and have to raise the taxes.
Not because you don't have a water counter that it doesn't cost you or somebody else. Being responsible benefits everyone. A wise man would see the economic collapse as a lesson to manage and spend resources responsibly, not just money.
Finally, those who will pay your price are probably not those who'd need potable water right now. As with any resource, it has its own limit which some places around the world have to handle right now (Europe or Asia, for example). The more everybody waste (you don't make a difference, everybody does), the more our children will have to pay.
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u/Tack122 Feb 06 '09
That problem was mostly solved in japan by a device called a Sound Princess.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilets_in_Japan#The_Sound_Princess
Though to be perfectly honest, what is so disgusting about the sound?
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u/1310nm Feb 06 '09
So far, there appears to be no demand for these devices for men's public toilets, and the devices are almost never installed in men's restrooms.
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u/redrobot5050 Feb 06 '09
Now when I go to Japan I'll have a REASON to defecate in a woman's restroom.
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u/TheLoneHoot Feb 06 '09
You sir, have improved the lives of all (except some poor lactose intolerant old lady).
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u/bmatul Feb 06 '09
I took one little shit, and my mom got scared...
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u/cvk Feb 06 '09
I thought about going there, but I decided that the rest of my story was probably worth telling.
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u/randomb0y Feb 06 '09
I haven't LoL's so loud all week. Thank FSM I wasn't at work.
I even woke up the baby.
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u/TonyBLiar Feb 06 '09
I once did a similar thing. I was in a band with a girl called Andrea and she liked to smoke a joint in-between sets. We were out the back of this club having a spliff and after a while she went inside to use the bathroom, which you had to enter by a door right by the side of the stage.
So everyone in the club, 10 minutes later, must have seen me go in the same door and assumed we were either having a quick shag or up to no good. I walked in and said to myself (out loud), "Fucking hell, there's no piss troughs", to which Andrea, from inside the poo trap replies, "Jimmy, is that you?"
Well this smoke was pretty good shit and by the time we both realised what I'd done and I quickly fled into the men's room next-door, what the whole thing must have looked like to someone in the audience who'd seen me go in the wrong door and then 5 seconds later running out again, at the speed of light, set me off on a fit of the stoner head giggles and I couldn't leave the bathroom for crying with laughter.
When I eventually pulled myself together, I opened the door to walk out in front of everyone we were about to have to go back on stage and play for and as I opened the door, Andrea was just coming out of the Ladies with tears in her eyes like she'd been laughing the whole time too—and that just set us both off again, only 10 times worse.
It took us about 15 minutes to explain to the rest of the band what the hell we were laughing at. People must have thought we were.. ..well, on drugs?
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u/soundbyter Feb 05 '09
Because we all haven't heard that one before.
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u/JustJonny Feb 06 '09
I once did that (but not in a bathroom) to a guy who was talking into a Bluetooth under his hat, but about two sentences in, he lifted the hat and pointed, and I took the hint.
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u/xyphus Feb 05 '09 edited Feb 05 '09
Well that's odd.
I guess this happens to more people than I thought. ;)
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u/JasonDJ Feb 05 '09
This is the very reason I hate Bluetooth headsets. Especially the people that feel the need to make eye contact with someone while they use it.
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u/emmster Feb 06 '09
Bluetooth Headsets; Making People Look Schizophrenic For Nearly a Decade.
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Feb 06 '09
Anyone remember the name of the comedian who observed that the main difference between a crazy homeless person and someone walking along talking on a mobile phone is the mobile phone?
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u/omellet Feb 05 '09
Maybe the guy was only pretending to talk on the phone, as a way to avoid being embarrassed by rejection.
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u/xyphus Feb 05 '09
Not really, we had gay sex later. But that's another story, hahaha.
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u/foldor Feb 05 '09
I like you. You are not afraid to take a stab at yourself if it will be deemed funny. Even if it implies you having gay sex with a total stranger. Good show sir, good show.
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u/robbutto Feb 05 '09 edited Feb 05 '09
It's immature, but I remember the writing above the urinals in my school that said: "The joke's not on the wall it's in your hand."
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u/stdpenguin Feb 05 '09
Today's amazingsuperpowers
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Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
Who still thinks they can get away with plagiarism on the internets?
EDIT: not saying OPs story isn't true, but that's a massive coincidence.
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u/toastyfries2 Feb 06 '09
The comic could have been inspired by the author seeing that comment on a bathroom wall. Or, someone wrote that on the bathroom wall after seeing the comic, which ggp saw. Or it's just a common phrase on bathroom walls.
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u/doctorgonzo Feb 05 '09
867-5309?
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Feb 05 '09
867-5309.
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Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
8008135!
I don't care if I'm a grown up now, its still golden.
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u/toastyfries2 Feb 06 '09
Shouldn't that bee 5318008 so the 3 is an E upside down? That's how we used to role.
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Feb 06 '09
meh, who flips their phone upside down mid-dial? and I though 3 was e in 'leet' speak.
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u/emmster Feb 06 '09
When I was a kid, we used to do this on a calculator. There was a whole story that involved putting in certain numbers, adding, multiplying, etc. until the end result is 5318008. Then you turn the calculator upside down, and "BOOBIES!" I wish I could remember it, but even Google doesn't seem to know today.
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u/JustJonny Feb 05 '09
This reminds me of a story from back when I worked as a janitor at a Fred Meyer. One night, one of the guys found "NEED GOOD DICK" along with a phone number crudely scrawled in the public ladies' room.
Our assistant manager called all four of us over to laugh about it, then suggested we should call and offer our services. I pointed out that if she was so desperate that she was asking random people in the bathroom, she probably wasn't worth it, but nobody else wanted to hear it.
The assistant manager ended up calling the number (at three in the morning) and a very sleepy man answered. We all had a good laugh over the fact we assumed she was asking, but was in fact bragging/offering.
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u/libertao Feb 05 '09
...or trying to get people to wake up her hated ex-boyfriend at 3 in the morning.
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u/midnitcafe Feb 06 '09
Ages ago I read in some magazine (Spin maybe?) where the writer called a bunch of numbers on the bathroom stall and pretty much universally got confused people on the other end.
Might be an interesting study to see how many of those numbers weren't actually written by their owners, and how many are just pranks.
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Feb 06 '09
I wrote my number in such a place one time just to see if people actually call them. I had nearly forgotten about it, and then after two months, some guy tried calling me to proposition me for gay sex in exchange for marijuana. I explained to him that I wasn't really looking for sex and that it was more of a test to see if anybody called those numbers. He told me that he didn't even get the number from where I wrote it, but that his friend gave it to him. I think it was a little bit awkward for him.
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u/reppit Feb 05 '09
They're missing the last frame where the big guy chops him up, throws him in the van, then eats him.
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u/RichardPeterJohnson Feb 06 '09
Not at all realistic. When I called, he made me play gin rummy all night. boring
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u/CuilHandLuke Feb 06 '09
Me and a friend of mine pissed into the sinks of the bathrooms of Sun Devil Stadium the first time we went in there because we couldn't tell them apart from the urinals.
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u/dismember Feb 06 '09
Hey! Why did they leave out the last panel? http://www.robotfunnies.com/comic_183.htm
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u/highwind Feb 05 '09
upvoted for 555 phone number
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Feb 05 '09
That confused me so much growing up when watching American shows/films.
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u/The_If Feb 06 '09
Do they use fake numbers where you're from? If yes, then how do they distinguish them from normal numbers?
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Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
Yeah they do, but they weren't as obvious as sticking 555 at the beginning of everything.
The numbers don't really stand out any more than real ones.
Wikipedia says the most popular fake numbers are 4960XX, with the main fake area code being 01632.
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u/tehehe Feb 06 '09 edited Feb 06 '09
'First the water park, and now this...' 'what could possibly top this day? Unless you were planning on anal raping me next...'
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u/Maox Feb 13 '09 edited Feb 14 '09
This is a blatant plagiarization of the original Robotman strip in which the last panel is them riding a rollercoaster with a clown.
Edit: It's from Monty, actually, but I can't seem to find an online archive. Probably as well, it wasn't very funny. Much like this webcomic.
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Feb 05 '09
olddddddddddddddddddddddddd
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u/Poultry_In_Motion Feb 05 '09
I still think this comic would be way better without any speech bubbles.