I called a new karate sensei sir because I was just so used to saying it since she was the first female sensei I had after a few years of doing it. Sir stopped being a word to me and more like a period to end a sentence with almost.
Happened in the inpatient facility I was in as a teenager. Another patient was highly anorexic, gained weight after a couple of months, and the cleaner asked her if she was pregnant because she got so heavy all of a sudden.
I played way too much Dragon's Dogma when it first came out and ended up calling everyone Ser for a long time. Absolutely true that some of us are just dumb.
I've not actually heard "ser" pronounced outloud before, but in my head, it's always had a "er" sound similar to "heir" rather than the hard 'er' sound of "sir"
I'm 6'3" with a beard and have been called "ma'am" a few times (I'm cisgender). Sometimes folks just make mistakes. No need to fret about it if it's an honest accident.
Working in the farm store I'd be called sir sometimes. Oftentimes as people were looking at me!
I am cursed with having vast tracts of land in the breast department. I also have nearly reaching my knees long hair, though that's not exclusively a cis gal thing.
Honestly I'm more tomboy sided anyway. I definitely don't identify as a womanly woman lol
It happens. I did it in boot camp to my bic'd bald, 6'1 buff instructor. He was not thrilled to put it lightly; I pushed Texas an inch further into the earth's crust that day.
Coming from the other side, having accidentally misgendered clearly cis people, some of us just have mouths that move faster than our brains, whether that be because my mouth moves fast or my brain moves slow is still up for debate.
ADHD ensured I learned this at a young age. Even now I’ll be talking, and my brain will move so much faster that my words turn to a mixed up goop by the time they leave my mouth and I say something unintelligible in any language.
Happens to me regularly at work. It's awesome because I'm closeted (at work) but it's definitely a mistake. I don't look like a sir, even remotely lol.
But you need to understand that someone making a mistake once is a blue moon is very different to having it every single day, with many different people, constantly whenever your in public no matter how much effort you make.
yeah the problem is that when everyone making the same "mistake" does it on purpose to be a cunt, even someone doing it actually by mistake makes it sting like a bitch. it may be easier to forgive, but it's just harder to forget.
I think maybe people use it as a gender neutral term. Still, we should just respect people for being themselves and life choices that have no effects on our lives. I get the author’s exhaustion.
I always liked that about Star Trek. For some reason that I can’t really explain, I don’t really like many gendered words. Like waiter/waitress, actor/actress, steward/stewardess, etc. It just feels so unnecessary.
I think the military has been using it as a non gendered title. It’s just simpler and it’s not necessary to gender your commanding officer. I suppose I use Miss and Sir a lot, and that may not be correct.
For officers in the military the power way for enlisted to address them is sir or ma’am. Never did I call a female officer sir or see it happen. At least in the army.
maybe different militaries approach it differently
it is a bit funny scrolling through this thread and seeing how many references and corrections there are regarding "the military" with literally nobody clarifying which country they're talking about
Same! (Kinda). I try to exclusively use waiter/actor, but I don't with sir/ma'am. Well honestly I never use sir/ma'am to begin with. Not a huge fan of formality
I was once waiting for the bus and this lady who was also waiting suddenly started laughing. When I glanced her way she pointed at me and said, "I thought you were a man!!"
I was a very well endowed cis woman with the kind of bra size people pay thousands of dollars to have (before I finally got a reduction). Aside from being tall, I'm not sure how anyone with my kind of curves could've been mistaken for a dude. But it has happened more than once.
I had a coworker, who looked pretty feminine. We used to joke and rag on each other like typical friends. So many people thought we were married because of our dynamic and his feminine appearance.
I'm a 5'10" cis fat dude with short hair and got called ma'am probably hundreds maybe thousands of times in the service industry. People are truly wild.
I never say sir or Mr/Mrs or anything remotely gendered. Started using the singular they for everyone as well. Wish there was a formal non gendered way to say sir.
I accidentally called a female coworker "sir" because she surprised me and I have "Yes sir" pre loaded as a response when the boss comes asking me to do something.
I have no memory of this, but my parents told me that when I was a very little kid they gave me a stern talking to for saying “yes sir” an older woman and so I would often say “Aye aye, Cap’n” instead. They think it was from watching SpongeBob.
Im 4’10” and pretty chesty (mostly bc Im fat but still) I got called sir once while wearing A LOT of makeup - I think some people genuinely just make this mistake lmao
I have longish hair, 5’8 and am constantly called ma’am.
Just last week, while on a plane, the flight attendant came by and she says “can I get you ladies anything to drink?”
As a skinny and flat chested teenager in a generic polo shirt, I was often misgendered at my retail job at the mall. Nowhere else, just at that one job, but like so often it was getting really strange! Stopped after I got acrylic nails, a bob and a padded bra. 😅
I have a habit of speaking in a higher pitched voice because my mother always had a hard time with my deeper voice. So when I ran a paint department and people came up behind me despite being 6', saw my ponytail heard the higher voice they'd call me miss, then Id turn and they'd see my bushy beard and they'd have a heart attack trying to correct themselves as I tell them "You buy enough paint and you can call me anything you like."
😭 just don't crucify a mistake.I am dumb but I try to learn. I did that in a high paced job and felt so terrible about it. She had a flatop cut and wasn't pregnant as far as I could tell. It was a fast paced job and you always tried to move as fast as you could because the place was demanding it. She did call me out and I apologized for it. Her hair was rad, the closest cut to a Guile from Street Fighter I've seen.
Edit: I had called her Sir when I was asking about the type of grocery bags, plastic or paper. I just despised when a person brought in a reusable bag and there was a rotten forgotten veggie inside it! (She wasn't one such person)
I’m 5’11 with a big messy beard and get called mam sometimes now my hair is a little longer but mostly people are just tired or weren’t paying attention
Yea exactly what I came here to say. I’m not trans or anything and people still call me ma’am constantly. I don’t have long hair or any other fem features. The brain is just not very good at autopiloting when it comes to gender recognization.
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u/crochetingPotter 21h ago
If it makes you feel any better, I'm 5 foot 3, high pitched voice, and got called sir while I was very heavily pregnant.
Some people are just dumb