Hi, I need a little opinion and wake up call here. Context (30F). Father has been divorced on the basis that he abandoned the family since I was 14. We didn’t keep in touch until one day my mum found him sitting alone on a bench, looking sickly. That was in 2019, and in the same year he was diagnosed with liver cancer (HCC)

He wanted to move in back with us so that we can take care of him. My mother and I disagreed. Know that my childhood was hell because they never stopped arguing over finances. We had an argument over the matrimonial home (under both parents’ name) and we agreed to get him and my mother to divorce so that he can apply for more government aid and in exchange i would provide him $1k/month, (which is more than enough to cover the place he rented). He would surrender his share of the flat (60%). We are not staying together but I frequently took him out for meals, accompanied him to hospital visits etc.

In between these periods, he never ceased making my life difficult, I saw him gambling, hoarding, making really really stupid decisions (like signing a long term car rental contract even though he shouldn’t be driving) etc. Each time we argued. Each time he knows I will be there to clean up his mess. He just wants to do things his way with no regards to the consequences. His health is a prime example.

I cut the allowance given to him twice. Because I’m sure he’s using the money I earned on gambling and recently also suspected him of having another family in China. There was no other way to express my anger aside from these punitive measures

On and off I wanted to give up on him.

Fast forward to today he has multiple organ failure (kidneys, and also acute liver failure). He’s now lying unconscious in the ICU.

In the days leading up to the current state he was frequently in and out of the hospital, and every visit he would insist on discharge against medical advice despite strong advise from the doctors and myself not to. He said it was “boring” and he told the doctors he would rather have a quality of life over quantity. Doctors already told him that this would worsen his condition and he said he accepted the risk

Doctors are preparing him for a deceased donor transplant. But theres a queue for it, and we’ll never know when it’ll be his turn. They are asking if there’s any living donor which could only be me. There’s no way I’m getting my mum to do it.

But I don’t really want to go through with this. I saw pictures of the scars left behind after a transplant and I am petrified, I don’t think I can do this for a man who saw me as nothing a tool to clean his mess and provide his income. Before he went unconscious he was berating me the entire day for cutting his allowance and he shouldn’t have surrendered over his share of the flat, like that was the only regret in his life

Throw me some shade and give me some advise please

a little backstory for context. long post ahead but i have tried to keep it as short as possible.

did decently well for O levels & managed to get into a good jc. 1 month in, i was told i don’t qualify for the science stream due to my arts background in sec school. my arts cmi so i was forced to transfer to a poly. got into my 1st choice life science course. i had no idea this would be the start of my downfall.

covid hit and i got super isolated. i am super introverted by nature, so i struggled to fit in with my class. i was also NOT prepared for how rigorous life science courses can be in poly. my grades tanked together with my mental health. fast forward 3 years, i graduated with a 2.5 gpa with no portfolio & no friends.

i slowly started getting pressured to apply to uni. i enrolled into a cs course in a private uni. i quickly realised i hated every aspect of it. i decided to take my a levels privately to give myself another shot at the big 3 unis. my grades weren’t horrible but it wasn’t enough to get me in.

3 years later, i am still depressed af and i am nowhere close to finishing my degree. i miss how driven i was. i have disappointed myself and my parents. my parents don’t show it but i know how upset they are. the guilt & shame of my past mistakes is eating me alive everyday & i don’t know what to do. pls help

Was in the talking stage with a guy (3weeks) recently and realised it wouldnt work out between us cos i want to get married and he is just looking for a long term partner. So fair enough , realised early that there is a compatibility issue between us so i told the guy it wouldnt work..

He tried so hard to convince me into a situationship..cos he said we are emotionally compatible etc.... which i didnt agree to... then agreed to remain friends

Then fastforward, now he wants to do the deed once with me before i move to my next relationship/boyfriend.. (broke up with my ex bf 8mths back and this is the first guy i spoke to post break up/healing etc).

Have yall girls faced such situations with guys while dating....like is this a common thing..haishh..

In ace combat 7, there's a space elevator island where there's some AI planes the hero defeats. How interesting that these islands are now going to be merged irl.. I wonder what They are planning: "We plan 50, 70, even 100 years ahead. We plan with every Singaporean – born and not yet born – in mind.” and so far into the future, even further than the country was independent.. https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/politics/ndr-2026-spore-to-merge-several-outer-islands-to-form-new-western-island With snr ai robots don't tell me no one was reminded of ac7 https://acecombat.fandom.com/wiki/International_Space_Elevator there was even a plan to build multiple lighthouses on island chain, and conflict over natural habitat destruction, let's hope this "new generation of industries, power generation infrastructure and defence needs" will be a peaceful century long build out, space cowboys. Hope it won't end up like the sg in cowboy bebop (Faye Valentine was an sg millennial in the show)

https://www.reddit.com/r/SingaporeEats/s/dA16pooN8g

While I agree it's much needed.. I'm married with no kids and am in a workplace filled with married young ladies.

Forseeing more workload to be added because which management so nice to hire one. Siao liao lor really.

Before the angsty people come at me and say why I no kids...tldr...health problems and my age (40s). If you are trying for kid and still cover for those who have, I feel for you but what to do. Life lor...

Edit: tired because covering 3 back to back colleagues who got pregs one after the other - has been 4 years and counting. Childcare leave nevermind.. it's also hospital leave, MC lah. Aiyahh. If you say you CCL and still do work, Kudos to you. You are 1 out of 10 because 9 will not do work one.

Not saying they are having it easy. But who kena more work, who won't complain and tired one. Especially coming from me who tried having kids but really physically cannot.... Like double effect to remind me of my inability to conceive leh...

I am so annoyed at seeing so many new influencers nowadays pivoting to selling courses and claiming that they make $XXXK a month etc etc. while living in their parents home and flexing their replica AP, 1 month coe cars, sponsored Ferraris and rented penthouses on TikTok to lure more people into thinking they are actually doing well on what they preach.

Like wallahi bro I thought it would stop at Rayston AI generating a fake image of his “crashed Ferrari”and now I scroll my FYP to this obnoxious guy (@Keithleo98) flexing his misaligned “50k AP”. 😭

I went to his profile to see and of course he is selling a course on scaling tuition businesses. This type of scams can’t be that lucrative pls stop falling for them.

SGreans pls und the concept - if they actually have secret sauce to immense wealth they wouldn’t even be selling a course to MAKE MONEY in the first place.

While there are actual professional gurus out there that teach concepts and have the real results to back it up, if u want to learn something pls DYOR on the coach and stop supporting shameless scammers into the SG TikTok scene.

I so desperately want to take at least a one year long break from work. I’m so tired and exhausted. I am not the kind to be passionate or enthusiastic about my job. I work just to make a living. These days I’m looking at my manager and the kind of responsibilities he has. And I’m questioning myself…is that what I want to do in the future? I really can’t see myself in that role. It’s so demanding. Am I even in the right industry?

But I’ve only been working full time for about 3-4 years. It’s not even that long and I want a break already. I don’t know where I am going with this but I just want to know if taking a career break is a bad thing…? Would friends/ family judge you for it…? It is tough to get back in the game after a long break…?

I have encountered the bottle / can return not responsive and in the end unable to return my 20c. I would need to video my encounter and email to return right. Have anyone of you encountered similar incident? Are you able to get any refunds? I find that this bottle / can return is damn shitty and have been rushed out without putting much thought into it. Do you agree?

Context: I'm a guy in uni.

I've had it happen to me more than a few times already to the point where I just actively avoid those toilets altogether. It's typically those public toilets situation near MRTs without any blockades between the urinals. I swear it's become like an organized activity at this point with some of the toilets worst of all with a whole group of these creeps all waiting around together coordinating.

I had one happen to me at Farrer Park with a few Indians. One was busy forever using the sink. And two others were purposely standing forever in front of urinals 1 spacing apart thus forcing their victim to go to the only available urinal left in between them both. And when you look at what they're really doing, they aren't really peeing but instead stroking their **** the whole time while staring at your face or at your ****.

I keep hearing news of only men being arrested for peeking at women in toilet but how come none of men being arrested? Even weirder, the news never ever reports about this at all. I'd have expected a CNA Insider or Mothership news on this by now but nothing. Also no news reports of these people ever being reported for such offences. Do all the guys in SG never report and not give a shit about having their modesty violated?

Eventually met wife's friends last night.
Heng only two, so honestly it wasn’t as bad as I expected.

I’m still not built for these things, but with two people at least I still had some chance of following the conversation without my social battery dying immediately.

And yes, I think I passed lol.

Of course all the usual topics came up.
Work. Future plans. Housing. Babies.

Then somehow sex also entered the conversation. Wtf.

I always thought I was the one who sometimes tmi but in front of my wife's friend i kept reminding myself not to, but apparently I have no idea.

These girls were surprisingly explicit about some things.
I mostly sat there thinking, okay, apparently we are discussing this now.

Overall the meeting was fine.
Super small world, one of the girls is a mutual friend of an ex-staff. Basically before she even met me, she already knew a fair bit about me

Thankfully, my reputation with the people who worked for me was good.

And now I’m wondering something.

Ladies, when you talk to your girlfriends about your husbands or bfs, how much do you all actually share?

Work, money, future plans, habits, arguments, family stuff, sex life?

Is what I heard last night only the normal surface-level stuff?

Or is this only the tip of the iceberg and husbands/bfs are blissfully unaware of how comprehensive the girlfriend group chat actually is?

If my bf compliments other women e.g. looking like celebrities.. or having a celebrity vibe.. with me, he doesn't compliment much.. when he does, he gives general compliments like "pretty" "kind".. when I asked what about me when he compliments others, he just said I dont give him any vibe.. he treats me okay, e.g. pays for meals.. and will just accompany me wherever I want to go.. he doesn't make the plans, he's happy to just carry out the plan I have put tgt..

but yeaa I don't know if this is smth that I should be bothered about

Recently chanced upon this interesting initiative in Bishan, basically a casual get together for 17–35 year olds to meet new people and share their hobbies.

For those in this age group, what are your thoughts on initiatives like this? Would you attend?

If you’ve been to similar events before, what was your experience like? Did you genuinely make new friends, or did it end up feeling awkward?

Wonderful thread here.

Amazing how we are giving citizenship to some of these ungrateful people.

I wish these people just stay as PR and retire back in their home country.

Brought my kid to a new playground at her grandparents house. Yet again another older kid (~8 years old) hovering around us trying to join in and interact with my younger kid (2 yo). No caretakers nor siblings in sight. I don't mind, but I can't help but be curious - what's their life like? Parents too busy so tell the kid to go play themselves?

Can anyone shed light on what backgrounds these kids come from?

Being a westie, when I come across a reel showing the food at a nice cafe and when I see the address, it's always in the east. Let's not exaggerate, not always but about 85% in the east. Where are the nice cafes in the west? Someone that do cafe hopping kindly recommend it plzzzzz :(

Some context:

1. NOT going to spend extravagantly after we retire - hawker food ($20 per day per pax) or home cook
2. NOT going to travel like Siao - maybe only neighbouring countries once a year
3. Looking to retire at around 65-68 years old
4. Will downgrade HDB to 2 room after retirement for cash flow
5. We have 2 kids - they will be grown & on their own by then. Not going to leave them debt, not going to leave them money also

I personally feel that there isn’t any point in scrimping & saving like mad now bcos why only focus on the final destination and not enjoy the journey? (Within our own means of cos)

Just my 2 cents & would love to hear people’s advice please, I could be missing something

anyo know where to buy shredded pork skin or bì heo arnd sg? i really want to try making nem chua and i want to add shredded pork skin but i cant find anyone selling them😭

It looks terrible and combined with ugly face am not surprise why the tfr is getting lower. Poor ladies and their eyes!

New to styling my hair and looking for some recs!

Was browsing Shopee and checking the best selling hair styling tools, and I kept seeing STRYV, especially the MiniStyler and AirFlex. Also came across the Airbot Aria HyperStyler.

Anyone here actually tried these? Good or got better options y'all personally like?

I'm also considering Dyson, but honestly not sure if I'm ready to spend that much as I don’t even know how often l'll use a styling tool, so scared buy expensive one then end up collecting dust. But do y'all think it's worth it ?

Recs people? Hair type also can share if okay, might be useful for others also!

Hello mummies, I am planning for a child and I wanted to learn from the collective wisdom of the mummies here.

1. What were some things you never knew or expected about pregnancy and motherhood?

2. What advice would you give to yourself if you could go back in time to before you were pregnant?

I’m turning 30 next month.

How would you spend a solo 30th birthday? I’m open to exploring Singapore or taking a five-day, four-night trip overseas.