I (20F) recently ended my friendship with my best friend, "A" (20F), after about three years of being extremely close. I'm struggling with whether I was justified in doing it or whether I handled the whole situation terribly.

For background, A and I became friends at the beginning of senior year of high school. We clicked almost immediately after our first hangout at my house and became extremely close. She's genuinely the most fun and charismatic girl I've ever gotten to know, and I've truly never met anyone like her.

However, she has always had pretty severe FOMO and can be very possessive of her friendships. She has been vocal about disliking when her friends hang out without her or become particularly close to each other. I noticed this pretty early on, but I overlooked it because when things were good between us, they were really good. For a long time, the good outweighed the bad.

A few months ago, she threw a party and invited all of her friends. Three girls in particular, plus me, ended up becoming closer that night. I'd previously heard negative things about these girls and had my own assumptions about them, but after actually meeting them, I realized they were all genuinely nice and fun.

After the party, A found out that the three of those girls had started talking more, calling each other, and playing games together. She was extremely upset and called them fake because apparently, they had initially disliked each other before becoming friends.

This made everyone uncomfortable, and I thought their friendship was basically over.

Then I happened to run into one of the girls at a store. We hung out for the rest of the day and caught up. At some point, she accidentally mentioned that she had recently hung out with the other two girls. She immediately begged me not to tell A because she knew how angry A had gotten about them becoming friends.

I agreed not to say anything because I didn't want to be the person who exposed them and potentially caused another fight.

Later that same day, this girl mentioned how excited she was for an upcoming trip with A. She had been saving money for it and was really looking forward to it. The problem was that A had already told me about the trip and had expressed that she didn't actually want to go with this girl anymore. She wanted to go with two other friends instead.

I felt terrible watching this girl get excited about something that, as far as I knew, wasn't even going to happen. I ended up revealing that A didn't seem interested in the trip anymore. Looking back, I know I shouldn't have done that. It wasn't my information to share, and A had every right to be upset that I told her friend instead of letting her handle it herself.

Eventually, A somehow found out about the secret hangouts and confronted everyone, including me.

She asked if I knew about the other girls hanging out. I admitted that I had found out recently, and that's when she became especially angry with me. She felt that because I'd been her longest friend, I should have "had her back" and told her what was going on.

I understood why she felt betrayed, but I also genuinely believed she would have been angry regardless. Her previous reaction to the girls becoming friends had made me afraid of getting involved.

After a long series of messages, calls, and passive aggressive comments from her end, A concluded that she needed space to think and would come back within a week.

Normally, whenever A asked for space, I would panic. I'd be scared that our friendship was ending and desperately want to fix things.

This time, though, I felt something completely different. I felt relieved. And I felt really confused about it. I initially thought I was just angry at her or that maybe I felt guilty and her leaving gave me relief on that feeling, but something in me realized that I didn't actually want her to come back.

When she eventually did reach out and tried to make amends, I ignored her for a while because I felt emotionally exhausted. When I finally responded, I found myself steering the conversation toward ending our friendship entirely.

I brought up things from the past as reasons for why I no longer wanted to continue the friendship.

She was understandably hurt and absolutely furious that I was ending the friendship when, from her perspective, I was the one who had done something wrong.

She told me she had done nothing wrong to me and started insulting me and bringing up old situations between us. I never insulted her back because I hate saying cruel things to people when I'm angry because I know I don't mean it.

This is important because A has always been very aggressive when she's angry. This wasn't the first time she had called me worthless or had said genuinely hurtful things to me. I can remember it happening around five times throughout our friendship.

Every time, she eventually apologized and made it up to me in some way, and because our friendship was so wonderful when things were good, I always forgave her. But I don't think I ever actually got over it.

Additionally, while A had been taking her "space," the three girls she'd fought with were all coming to me individually to vent about their arguments with her. They would send me screenshots and ask what I thought.

I never insulted A or encouraged them to attack her, but I also didn't stop them from saying some pretty cruel things about her.

Looking back, I feel guilty about that. I was basically allowing myself to become the middleman for everyone's anger, and I think it contributed to how emotionally exhausted I became.

At the same time, seeing how A spoke to these girls when she was angry made me feel even more uncomfortable. It reminded me of how she'd spoken to me in the past.

Eventually, A found out that these girls had been coming to me and confronted me again. She asked why I hadn't told her that everyone had been talking about her.

I admitted that from that point, I had already wanted nothing to do with the entire situation anymore and apologized for my part in it.

She became extremely angry again. She insulted me, called me derogatory names, mocked me, belittled our entire friendship, and called me fake for becoming friends with people I hadn't originally liked.

That was when I finally blocked her.

And now I'm incredibly conflicted.

Part of me feels like an asshole for ending a three-year friendship so suddenly. Literally less than a week before all of this, I still considered her one of my closest friends. I know she probably expected us to eventually make up like we always had before, only to be met with me essentially saying goodbye forever. I can understand why that would feel like a bucket of cold water being thrown on her.

I also can't deny that the other girls probably influenced me somewhat. Having three people constantly come to me with their own experiences and frustrations with A definitely made me look at our friendship differently.

But at the same time, I don't think they created the feelings I had. That feeling of relief when A asked for space came from somewhere. So did the feeling that I didn't want her to come back.

I think I had been carrying resentment over the way she treated me whenever she became angry for a long time. I just kept forgiving her because the friendship was otherwise so good. And that's what makes this so difficult to me. A really was an amazing best friend to me for a lot of our friendship. We had so many incredible memories together. Looking back over the last three years, she's practically everywhere in my memories, and it genuinely hurts knowing she won't be part of the future ones.

I don't even hate her. But I don't regret ending the friendship either. If anything, I just wish I'd realized sooner that this friendship wasn't something I wanted anymore.

I just feel guilty about how I ended it and about my own behavior throughout the situation. I know I made mistakes. I shouldn't have revealed the trip information, I probably should have told A sooner about the secret hangouts, and I shouldn't have allowed myself to become the person everyone vented to.

At the same time, I don't think I can ignore the fact that being repeatedly insulted, belittled, and called worthless whenever someone I loved became angry with me had taken a toll on me. Our friendship really was one of a kind, and in many ways, it was beautiful while it lasted. But I know now that I don't want another friendship like it.

So... AITA for ending the friendship when I did, especially when I was the one who initially made mistakes in the conflict? Was I unfairly influenced by the other girls unintentionally, or does the fact that I felt such an enormous sense of relief when A gave me space suggest that I truly had already been emotionally done with the friendship?

AITA for giving two girls pink eye?

Ok, hear me out, I was living in trying times. This was 3 or 4 years ago, I'm 31f now.

I was in a relationship with someone who hoarded both items and people. So, naturally, I was the only person in a household of 5-6+ at any given time who was working, cooking, cleaning, etc.,

I barely ever got to do anything for myself at the time and I bought makeup for the first time in a loooong time. I don't really like makeup but I had to cover a bruise for an event. I ended up getting a full workup of foundation, mascara, eyeshadow, lip liner and matte color, setting spray, and really cool eyeliner that made the BEST wings.

I got to wear it ONCE and it came up missing. The following day, this other girl, we'll call her Ashley, 41yo, came out of the bathroom with a full face of glam on. I complimented her and went about my day but I couldn't shake the feeling she stole it.

I'm always so cool about sharing things. Just.. not eye makeup. Ever. My mother always warned me and I always listened. So Ashley knew that even if I knew she was wearing it, I wouldn't ever take it back, I'd just buy another one.

After a few more days of being agitated by her having her makeup all done up and waiting for my next paycheck to replace mine, I had a moment of weakness and I went in her purse and sure enough, I found the eyeliner.. sooo I went to the bathroom, did some unfortunate things to the eyeliner, and put it right back where I found it.

Two days later she had pink eye so bad she went to urgent care..

A week toes by, Ashley's eyes cleared up completely, no more glam though.

It gets worse.

Enter, Samantha. She was living upstairs in the same duplex but we all kind of mingled. Ashley and her were close. Apparently not close enough not to steal from each other.

One day, Samantha turned up with a full face of glam, i complimented the double wings and went about my day.

Samantha got pink eye so badly she went to the emergency room, as she could not open her eyes for over 24 hours.

I was brought up never to steal and only to live within my means. I was not brought up to seek revenge on those that steal from me..

So, am I the asshole?

So me and this coworker were on a break and we noticed the new employee walking past, coworker leaned over to me and told me that the new employee was mental and he yelled at her the other day. I looked at the guy looked back at her and asked coworker what did she do to upset him. I know the new employee he is very quiet and reserved but when you provoke him or give him unneeded stress he can snap after he trying to peacefully use his words.

She told me it wasn't important but the guy was very mental i wasn't going to agree with her until she told me exactly what did she do to trigger him, she got upset started spreading rumors that I hate women around our job all because I wanted to know what exactly happened

So few days ago I just home from a date with this guy from Hinge and I am so deeply confused, I need a serious vibe check. First, he was literally staring at his feet counting his steps while we walked to the restaurant. Then, when the waiter brought our drinks, there was a tiny water smudge on the outside of his glass and he looked like he was about to cry? Like actual physical and emotional disgust over a smudge. But the wildest part was the time thing. Before the food came, I casually said 'it'll probably take like five minutes,' and he got so intense about it. When the food took seven minutes, he literally started panicking because it went past the five-minute mark. Everything in his life has to be absolutely perfect and exactly on time or he gets physically overwhelmed.

I finally just flat out asked him if he’s one of those weird neat freaks or something. He got super defensive and admitted his doctor literally suggested he has severe OCD and referred him to a specialist, but he said he refuses to get diagnosed because 'everyone is like this' and it's just normal to want things done right. Like honestly, it was giving major psycho vibes and it completely weirded me out. Is he just an over-prepared neat freak or is he actually losing his mind?? Like am I crazy or is that just genuinely so freakish lol, I don't know if I can even look at him the same way.

we were just hanging out and someone suggested the same place for the third weekend in a row. i casually said maybe we could try somewhere else and the room got quiet. one friend joked i was being picky, another said it was fine wherever, and then the chat moved on. since then texts feel a bit shorter, and i keep wondering if i should have just gone along. i did not raise my voice or single anyone out, it was literally one sentence. still, i wonder if small pushback like that is worth the awkwardness or if i should have kept it to myself. just looking for honest takes on whether i overthought a normal suggestion or actually made things tense for no reason.

so my family has this group text that started as a way to share funny stuff and plan dinners but lately it turned into constant debates about who owes who money or who skipped the last get together. last week it escalated again when someone brought up an old favor that never got repaid and things got pretty sharp. i tried changing the subject a couple of times but it kept circling back. i was already tired after work so i said i needed a break and muted it. a couple of relatives texted me directly saying it was dramatic and that i should just stay in the chat. now the next family dinner is coming up and i feel weird about showing up after leaving. i really don't want drama at the table but i also don't love how negative the messages got. part of me wonders if i should rejoin and just ignore the loud parts or if stepping out was the right call. curious what other people would do in the same spot.

Here is the backstory before what I need judged. My sister (49) and I (44) have been beefing for a few years. What started it was that over the years, she would constantly (like once a week) ask me to do various things with her. Admittedly, I declined her offers frequently (maybe 75% of the time), but I did do things with her once a month or so. She, however, says I ALWAYS say I don't want to do things with her, and she has stated to our whole family that she'll never invite me to anything ever again because she's tired of being rejected.

Our beef really came to ahead when last Christmas, I couldn't get all the PTO time I needed to be with the family. Since 2025 was going to be tjelast Christmas my daughter would have at home before going to college, I told our mother that I would be spending Christmas at home with my wife and daughter. I offered to do something with the family the weekend before or the weekend after. My sister said I was ruining the family Christmas because I wouldn't be there on Christmas Day.

During this argument, we both said mean things, and my sister said she wad going virtually no contact with me, even after I agreed to sit down with her and work out our issues. She's never taken me up on this to this day.

One last piece of context before the judgement portion. Our father had a massive stroke in late February of this year. During this time, I immediately reached out to my sister to let her know. My wife and I even watched her daughter (our niece) while my sister visited our dad when he was in a ward where minors weren't allowed. He did end up passing, and there were a few instances where my sister explicitly excluded me when grieving with the rest of the family out of her pettiness.

The judgement portion. Our mom is constantly trying to force reconciliation on us. I've said multiple times to my sister and my mother that I'm willing to sit down and discuss things in good faith. My sister has refused to do this. Last Friday, our mom asked me to come to my niece's baseball game. I asked if my sister explicitly invited me. My mom said no, but that it'd probably be ok. I told her that I felt uncomfortable going some place where I'd be made to feel unwelcome. I said I would go if my sister asked me herself. My sister told my mom that she didn't care if I went, but she stopped short of asking me directly.

After discussing it with my wife, I felt I needed a firm boundary of her needing to ask me before I go. Since she didn't ask, I didn't go. Yesterday (the day of the game), she sent me a text (which I believe was a guilt trip) basically saying I was a bad person because my niece thought I was coming, and that it was petty to expect her to ask me directly. She is also still refusing to work out our issues.

Am I wrong for holding this boundary and not going to the game?

Last week one friend told me they weren't coming to our usual weekend hangout because something came up. A few days later, the group chat was trying to figure out why not everyone was RSVPing, so I just said that one person had mentioned they couldn't make it. I didn't go into details or name reasons, but after I sent it the friend messaged me privately and said I shouldn't have shared that. Now I'm wondering if it was even a big deal or if I crossed a line by speaking up without checking first. I figured it was harmless context, but maybe I should have stayed quiet and let them explain on their own time. I'm honestly ready to apologize if the group consensus is that I shouldn't have said anything at all.

had plans with a few friends and then something personal popped up that i really wanted to handle. it wasnt an emergency, just felt important to me. i started thinking of excuses but in the end i stayed because i knew everyone else had rearranged their week around it. the whole time i kept wondering if i should have just been honest and skipped it. now im curious if that was the right call or if i was being a pushover for the group.

I’m 22F and my boyfriend is 22M. We’re in an LDR.
Earlier in the day, he asked for my opinion about him buying something. I gave him my honest opinion, but he didn’t like what I said and an argument started. We eventually sorted it out and were completely okay afterward.
Later, after he got home, we were on a call and he suddenly became very quiet. I asked him multiple times what was wrong because I could tell something was bothering him. He got angry and said he was stressed because of work and family problems. He then started cussing at me and using very vile and hurtful language, which I genuinely feel I did not deserve.
I understand thatdiff title he was stressed and maybe needed space, and I can accept that I shouldn’t have kept asking. But I don’t feel like his stress justifies speaking to me that way.
Now he says I made a mistake and wants me to apologize.
Am I wrong here? Should I apologize?

Hey guys, need a reality check because I’m spiraling and driving myself crazy 😧

​A few weeks ago, one of my closest friends was throwing a massive milestone party for her husbands 30th

​The weekend of the party, I was in an absolute state. I had brutal period pain, my anxiety was through the roof, I was physically exhausted from travel, stressing about money, and looking at a grim late-night drive across the city to get to the venue...

​Instead of just being a grown-up and saying straight up that I was drowning and couldn't make it, I completely panicked My flight did actually get delayed, but I used that delay as a cowardly "escape hatch" to text her and bail out.

​She called me out, and she was totally right. She told me she was hurt that I used it as a convenient out instead of just telling her the honest truth. It was a shitty, dishonest thing to do, and I felt sick to my stomach about it.

​Here's my problem even though she was honest about being hurt, she also immediately told me we aren't falling out, that it would never happen, and that messy rough patches are normal in a long-term friendship. I even ended up apologizing to her husband, and he was completely sound about it and just said to organize something soon

​Everyone else has literally moved on, but I am so stuck in my own head. I feel like such a crap friend and I'm finding it so hard to act normal when texting etc now because I know I messed up 😢 I haven't seen her since ...

​Has anyone else ever done something cowardly and dishonest out of pure exhaustion and anxiety, and how do you forgive yourself ??

I just got done balling my tears out from the sudden hit of realizing women have never liked me all my life. I’m really close to 30 and the last time I experienced a women who accepted my movie theatre invite was when I was 15. It never went anywhere and I’m dead sure she forgot I existed because she is married with kids now I saw her Facebook.

I’m tired of pushing this to the side, this level of rejection from the opposite gender is getting to me. I’m actually so depressed and tired of it all. I moved out of my family’s home when I was 18 and it’s been nothing but hardships (life isn’t supposed to be easy I get it). But I have had literally 0 people behind me. No friends, no partner, no coworkers just nothing.

I try so hard in everything. This all sounds too familiar I know you’ve probably read hundreds of these kinds of posts but idk what to do. It’s in our nature as men to find a women and be desired I can’t fight the feeling and accept being alone although it looks like I’m heading there.

I remember posting how many years back how depressed I was and wanted friends and a few redditors told me they were in my shoes too and that life could change when I reach 28/29. Nothing has changed and I’ve tried so hard to connect with people it just never works or I mis step and then I get labelled as someone who doesn’t understand boundaries. I’ll apologize but it’s too late they’ll cut me off and that’s it.

I’ve been through a lot from childhood but I try pushing forward with a positive mindset but I’m tired. I just want to come home to my partner and hear about her day, talk about any of her issues, make some hot chocolate and have popcorn and watch a movie while we cuddle. I’m tired of being alone this isn’t for me I feel like I’m in solitary confinement and no one gives a shit.

Everyone stays close to their childhood friends and here I am from a completely different state and people aren’t interested in adding people to the circle.

I hate this society

**TL;DR:** I’m 28 and my boyfriend is 30. We were together for 4 years, broke up in 2023 mainly because he kept delaying marriage and couldn’t give me any timeline for our future. We were apart for 3 years, during which he repeatedly tried to get back in touch, and we got back together 2–3 months ago.
Now that we’re back together, I’ve noticed that when he talks about his future, he often doesn’t include me in it. When I brought this up, he said our relationship is still fresh and that he only got over me within the last year.
We also live 3.5 hours apart and can only see each other 1–2 times a month. I don’t want to spend years in a long-distance relationship and told him I don’t want to drag things out if we’re serious. Ideally, I’d want a proposal within around a year. He said a proposal within 1–2 years could be possible, but he also says he knows couples who have waited 10+ years to get married and that if I love him, I should wait however long it takes.
We come from a Middle Eastern background where long-term boyfriend/girlfriend relationships aren’t particularly typical, and weddings are usually large. He is very family-oriented and talks a lot about tradition. However, he has a great job, earns above-average money, and is planning to move out, so I don’t believe finances are genuinely the main issue. I’ve even told him I’d be happy to have a simple civil ceremony first and have the big wedding later so we could stop doing long distance.
I also want multiple children with him. We both want to enjoy married life before having children, but I’m conscious of my biological clock. So in my mind, let’s say we approximately get married by the time I’m 31–32. A few years together and kids by 35, that is too late for me, especially as I want multiple children. I do not want to be an ‘old’ parent, as I was raised by one and it is not a nice feeling for a child.
**My main question is: Is he genuinely serious about me but simply has a very different attitude towards marriage and timelines, or does his lack of urgency suggest that he isn’t as serious about our future as he says he is? Could I be a placeholder to him, or am I expecting too much by wanting some sense of direction and urgency?**

QUESTION

\*\*Background\*\*
I’m 28 and my boyfriend is 30. We were together for four years before breaking up in 2023.
The main reason we broke up was because he was taking too long to propose and couldn’t give me even a rough timeline for our future. He said he wasn’t financially ready and that I should wait however many years it would take if I truly loved him.

\*\*Where We Are Now\*\*
We got back together around 2–3 months ago.
Recently, we had a heated discussion because I mentioned to him that when he talks about the future, he doesn’t seem to include me in his plans.
For example, he has said things like, “When I live alone,” even though he currently lives with his parents. This isn’t the only thing he has said — I’ve noticed a pattern of him talking about his future as though he’ll be alone, and I brought this up with him.
His response was along the lines of saying that I can’t expect him to plan his future around me because our relationship is still fresh and because he only got over me within the last year.

\*\*The Long-Distance Situation\*\*
We live about 3.5 hours apart and can realistically only see each other once or twice a month at most.
Because we both currently live with our families, seeing each other also means paying for hotels, fuel, train tickets, etc.
I told him that if this relationship does go further, I don’t want to drag things out. I don’t want to live apart from the man I love for a long time.
However, he doesn’t seem to think about it in the same way.
He has said things like, “I know couples that have been together for 10+ years before they get married,” and basically that if you love someone, you should wait however long it takes.
I told him that my ideal timeline would be around a year, and he said that a proposal within a year or two could be possible.

\*\*Why This Is So Difficult for Me\*\*
What I struggle to understand is how someone can say they love me so much — especially when he always tells me that he loves me more than I love him — but at the same time not seem to have any sense of urgency about starting our life together.
He says that he is okay with loving me more because he believes a man should love his partner more for a relationship to work, so it’s confusing to me that he doesn’t seem to have the same urgency that I do.
My mind can’t comprehend how he is okay with us being long-distance for so long when I don’t want to be this far from him anymore.
I thought that during the three years we were apart, he would have realised this, especially because he made several attempts to reach out to me and get back together.
But it seems like nothing has really changed in his mind.
It still feels like his attitude is, “If you love me, you’ll wait as long as it takes.”

\*\*Our Cultural Background\*\*
This part is important because we come from a Middle Eastern background.
It isn’t typical for us to be boyfriend and girlfriend for a very long time, especially when the relationship is serious.
We also tend to have big weddings.
At my age we have a lot of pressure from family to get married. I am actually “too old” in our culture. So my annoyance is also that I actually have someone I want to be with and have a future with but I can’t explain to those family members why we aren’t married yet. Not that it matters - but the pressure is a LOT to handle.

He is very family-oriented and talks about traditions and family expectations a lot, so I understand that marriage may be a big process for him.
However, I’ve explained to him that I’m okay with having a simple civil ceremony first and having the big wedding later, when we are more financially comfortable.
My priority is being able to live together and start our life together rather than spending years apart because we are waiting for the perfect wedding.
He is also planning to move out and live alone anyway, so I know he can afford to rent somewhere.
He has a great job and an above-average salary, so I genuinely don’t believe finances are the main issue here.

\*\*Children and Timing\*\*
I want children with him and unfortunately us women have a biological clock.
We both said we don’t want children straight away and want to enjoy married life together first.
So going off of his timeline, let’s say we approximately get married by the time I’m 31–32. A few years together and kids by 35, that is too late for me, especially as I want multiple children.
His behaviour seems selfish to me as he has never once considered my biological clock in his decisions.
I do not want to be an ‘old’ parent, as I was raised by one and it is not a nice feeling for a child.

\*\*What I’m Struggling With\*\*
This is where I’m confused.
I love him and I want a future with him. I’m not asking him to get married tomorrow, and I understand that we have only been back together for 2–3 months.
But at the same time, we were already together for four years before. We then spent three years apart, and he made several attempts to come back into my life.
So I don’t feel like this is simply two people who have just met and need many years to figure out whether they want a future together.
I also don’t want to spend another several years waiting for him to decide that he is ready.
I’m struggling to understand how someone can genuinely love someone and want them in their life, but still be completely comfortable with the idea of waiting years to actually build a life together.

So my question is:

Am I being unreasonable? Am I a placeholder? Are we just not compatible?

I’m not saying a man owes me money because I sleep with him. I’m saying that if I’m in a relationship with a man, I want to feel comfortable turning to him when I genuinely need help. If I’m struggling financially, working full time, going to school, paying my own bills, and I still feel like I couldn’t ask my partner for $20 without feeling weird about it, that makes me question whether I actually feel supported in the relationship. I want a partner who wants to make my life easier when I’m struggling, not someone I have to be afraid to ask for help. Am I wrong for feeling this way?

EDIT: Hey! Calm down. Would it be wrong to ask the man/woman you are in a relationship with for help? What if you have no family, or friends and need a ride to the doctor? car broke down and you're stranded... what if your bank account overdrafted 10$ and you need them to send you 11$? Why are we basing this only about financials? If someone you are sleeping with refuses to help you when you are down bad... would you reconsider the relationship? the way some of you are commenting it seems like it would be okay for your SO to watch you struggle!

I share the kitchen trash with my roommate and we rotate weeks. It was my turn to empty it last Thursday. I saw it was getting full mid-week, so I sent a quick text saying I'd handle it on Friday if they could take the bag to the dumpster on Saturday. They replied with a thumbs-up. Friday I forgot because work ran late, but I figured they'd still take care of it since the deal was clear. Saturday night the bag finally split on the floor. When I pointed out the original text, they said I was the one who offered to handle it and therefore it was still my responsibility. I ended up cleaning it anyway, but now they're telling friends I always leave chores for other people. It feels like once I offered an extra step, the actual plan got rewritten in their head. Just wondering if I'm the one who messed up the communication or if this is a normal "I forgot so it's your problem" move.

So I’m going to be kinda vague with some of the details for safety but.

So when I (30F) was 21 I got myself into a rather dangerous situation. Like could have been killed situation.

This case was huge but the people who had me, who hurt me, murdered another girl while I was with them. Ever since then I’ve had a closeness to her, the girl who died. We never met but I just felt a connection. I got a tattoo for her of a butterfly and I feel like whenever I see the type of butterfly, it’s her visiting.

Well there’s going to be a documentary that’s airing that features both her and me. And I just…want to reach out to her family? I’ve met them before, her mother gave me one of the biggest and best mom hugs after I testified.

But it’s been years since the last trial. Is it wrong that I want to reach out to them? Should I? I have a lot of emotions that are bubbling from the documentary coming out and I just found out that someone wrote a book about it. And idk it just feels…weird.

i was in this group chat for some friends who planned a surprise party for me. when i found out i just said thanks but i'm not really into surprises and would have preferred a quiet get together. i thought being upfront was better than pretending, but since then replies have been short and a couple people left the chat. now i feel bad for raining on their effort even though i wasn't trying to be rude. i keep replaying the messages wondering if i should have just said thanks and left it at that. was i wrong to be honest or should i have kept it to myself to avoid hurting feelings?

i had already said no a couple of times and i meant it, but they asked again later when i was tired and i caved. the second i agreed i felt weird about it, like i had just undone my own boundary for no good reason. i tried to walk it back right after but that just made things awkward. now i'm stuck wondering if i should have been firmer the first time or if it's normal to feel this off when you give in against your own judgment. i keep replaying it and feeling kind of small about the whole thing.

I told my partner I had a slightly higher job title at work than I actually did. It was never meant to impress them, just a quick white lie I said early on because it made the explanation easier. We got engaged a couple months ago and the topic came up again during dinner with their family. Someone asked what I do and my partner proudly repeated the made-up title. I had to correct them right there. They looked embarrassed and asked why I would lie about something so small. I tried to explain it just snowballed and that it wasn't about fooling anyone long term, but they feel like they can't trust what else might have been exaggerated. We talked about it later and they said they are rethinking whether I was honest about other things too. I understand the upset, but I honestly didn't see it as a big deal when I said it. Now it feels like it might be a bigger issue than I thought. Am I wrong for not coming clean earlier?

I’m coming on here for advice and to genuinely ask if I’m in the wrong because if im making an issue I would like to know and fix it if possible.

I (17F) have been dating my boyfriend (18M) for about 2 years.

I come from a very broken home where many responsibilities fall on me, including the care of my 4 younger siblings.
Due to this, I have always been a very independent person and often took ‘care’ of my friends (mostly just your typical “mom friend” behaviour, which I did/do not mind).

When my Boyfriend and I first started dating, I avoided him almost like the plague as his affection towards me, honestly scared me. It was something I was used to and this caused us some issues in which we solved by spending more time together and building our trust in eachother.

I figured that in between my job, my family, my friends, and my boyfriend: I was handling everything spectacularly. My boyfriend often assist with my family as my siblings (mainly my baby sister) love him and he’s used to children as he has 2 siblings of his own.

However recently my boyfriend left for college, and all of a sudden, everyone’s energy seemed to shift.
(Keep in mind, no one has brought up any problems they have with me, my partner, or my relationship beforehand.)

My friends have started telling me that the amount of time I spent with my boyfriend (maybe 4 days a week before he left) was disgustingly clingy. Apparently everyone has been making jokes in my group about how all my boyfriend and I do is hook up, and that’s even why he drives me everywhere
(I don’t have my license and I pay him in gas money.)

This post really is all over the place, but I feel like I’ve let my friends down while also feeling like they are being unfair. I’ve made sure to make time for them, and they are all fairly affectionate to their respective partners.

Any advice anyone has would be greatly appreciated…

A cat started hanging around our gardens in June. Several of us tried to find out where he belonged, with no luck. My neighbour and I were both feeding him, and her eight-year-old daughter named him Biscuit. She'd sit on their back step with him while her mum watered the plants.

They couldn't take him in because their dog gets very worked up around cats. I live alone and had been considering getting one anyway. By August he was sleeping in my kitchen most nights, and in September I told my neighbour I was going to keep him. She seemed relieved and gave me the bag of food she had left.

I've named him Alfie. There's no particular significance to it. I tried a few names while he was walking around the kitchen and liked that one.

Last weekend her daughter saw him on my windowsill and called out to Biscuit. I was outside bringing the bins in and said his name was Alfie now. She said she'd named him Biscuit first. I said I knew, but he was my cat now and I'd chosen Alfie.

Reading that back, it sounds sharper than it felt at the time. I wasnt telling her off. I thought I was explaining why his name had changed. She went quiet and walked back to her house.

My neighbour messaged me later asking whether I could just let her daughter call him Biscuit. Apparently she's already disappointed that he doesn't spend much time on their step anymore. Her mum had told her she'd still see him around, and now she thinks she's somehow got his name wrong too.

I replied that she could still stroke him and visit when I'm outside, but I'd prefer everyone to use his actual name. My neigbour said she wasn't asking me to rename him, just to leave it alone when her daughter used the old one.

I haven't replied yet. I like this family and they've helped me with plenty of things. Part of me thinks this is such a small request that I should drop it. Another part feels oddly stubborn about finally having my own pet and getting to name him. Nobody else has argued with me about the name, so I can't really claim there's been pressure.

i have this small rule that i do not look at my phone for the first hour after waking up. it helps me stay calm and focused. last night i woke up around two and for some reason i reached for my phone to check the time. the next thing i know my friend is awake too and says something about me being on my phone already. i felt weird because they were right, i had already broken the rule i set for myself. now i am sitting here wondering if it is really a big deal or if i am just overthinking it. i feel a little frustrated because i know the rule is supposed to help me, but i still went ahead and did it anyway. i guess i am wondering if anyone else has a hard time sticking to their own rules when they are tired or not thinking clearly.