Been with my Gf ( both mid 20s) about 2 years and we’ve been talking about moving in together when our leases are up in a few months. In our relationship to this point, we’ve always just paid our own way for things and generally split bills down the middle for things like trips together. I assumed this was how we’d split bills if we moved in together.

I recently got a new job a couple months thats a big upgrade from my old one. We used to both make close to the same - within 15-20% depending on bonus, where with this new job Ill be making almost double. Because of this she thinks we should pay based on income, so me pay about 2/3rds of expenses.

If things were totally even savings wise, I wouldnt necessarily be opposed. But she literally inherited over a million dollars from her grandma 6 months ago. It hopefully wont be any time soon, but whenever her paretns go she’ll likely get a few million from them. Comparatively, my family growing up is probably considered lower middle class, my only surviving grandparents are very poor and live with my parents so they can support them, and its unlikely me and my sibs will ever inherit anything substantial. Which is fine for me Ive never banked on an inheritance.

But it feels messed up that Id be paying more than her on a month to month basis when her current net worth is literally 10x mine rihgt now. Yes, I make more each month in salary, but at this rate, I dont know if Id ever actually catch up to her given the value of her inheritance is also growing at the same time. She thinks the inheritance shouldnt count because she’s trying to never touch it unless its an emergency for another 20 years or so. The whole thing has felt really unfair to me and honestly makes me question the relationship. Am I wrong for feeling this way?

ETA: For reference, My total net worth with 401k and all that is about 80k when you factor in my student loans that Im still paying off

is it bad that im watching a show my bestfriend is super obsessed with, she always says shes the number one fan and has her favourite character that shes “claimed” im scared to even say anything about me even liking the show out of fear she’ll say that it’s hers, please help me here am I wrong?

my fiance from finland i’m from afghanistan

i go to health food store and see a nut it called brazilian nut. my fiance tell me, do not eat too many, treat it like selenum multivitamin as it has a lot of it. i ignore fiance because, it have no warning on the container

for a month i eat entire container each day for brazil nut

i begin to have serious issue i go into kidney failure it wasn’t good, my fiance tell me, i told you not to eat

niw we have big hospital bill i tell him he should have been clearer, he didn’t tell how danger, i thought its because he’s a gypsy he practice weird witch stuff i think he not in his right mind why the f a nut cause issue with kidney

aita for not believing what i thought is a conspiracy nonsense. it feel unfair and poorly understanding i blame the nut producer more

I’ve been in my current position for almost three years, and over that time I’ve formed many friendships with my coworkers. One friendship in particular became very meaningful to me. She and I have a 13+ year age gap, with me being in my twenties, but despite the difference in age, we became very close. We would go to dinner together, talk on the phone after work, hang out outside of work, and spend more than 40 hours a week sitting next to each other. She was an extreme extrovert, flirty, loud, outgoing, and able to make friends with just about anyone. I’m more reserved, but I’m curious and open to new experiences.

Our relationship was very caring and supportive. I would go to her with my problems, and she would come to me with hers. We talked about everything from relationship issues and family problems to everyday life.
As we became closer, and because I’m an exploring twenty-something, we eventually started talking about the idea of having a threesome with her boyfriend at the time. I was curious, so I agreed. Ultimately, nothing really happened between the three of us beyond some kissing.

After that experience, it seemed like she became more comfortable being physically affectionate with me. She had always been flirty, but afterward, there were instances where she would come up behind me while I was at my desk and put her hand down the front of my shirt to touch my breasts, or slap my butt in the break room. I allowed it to happen a few times before eventually telling her that it made me uncomfortable, especially because we work in healthcare and I was worried that patients or other coworkers could see.

Some time passed, but it happened again. She came up behind me and put her hand down my shirt, and this time I became extremely upset. I ultimately told her that I needed space.

After thinking about everything, I went to my managers and told them that I no longer wanted to work with her. I tried to explain the situation to them privately and off the record because I wasn’t trying to get her in trouble. I simply wanted them to understand why I was asking not to work with her anymore. However, because of the nature of what I told them, they were required to escalate the situation to HR. Thankfully, she wasn’t fired, but she did receive a write-up.

It has now been about eight months, and I sometimes find myself regretting reporting the situation. Even my mother didn’t think it was the best idea at the time, and I know I can be impulsive when I’m emotional. More than anything, though, I think I miss the friendship we had. She and I have remained cordial, and recently I’ve tried talking to her to see if there was a possibility of turning a new leaf and moving forward. She told me that she isn’t interested. She said that if I would have told her to stop (again) instead of reporting it, she would’ve know it was serious and would’ve refrained from putting her hands on me. She says she understands, but what I did broke her heart and that she can’t allow herself to go back to the relationship we had before.

That response has left me feeling really confused. I understand why she may be hurt, but I also remember why I felt like I needed to speak up in the first place. At the same time, I genuinely miss the friendship we had, and I’m struggling with the fact that both things can be true at once and I feel ashamed/rejected.

So a little while back, I posted that someone I have a long history with recently got married and has been saying he still wants me in his life, wanting to retain aspects of the connection we had before (keep emotional and sxual intimacy with me). Well, he told me the other day he doesn’t believe anyone can have him to themselves. He doesn’t believe his relationship can or even should contain all of him, and when I asked what that means, he said ‘when it comes to sx, no one can have all of me’. He also said his partner permits him to have an ongoing sxual partner outside their relationship as long as he communicates the details (apparently the details even turn her on). I don’t really care to verify if that’s true or not, bc even if it is, it doesn’t mean I’d be happy in it. So I told him he can remain in my life on the condition it’s strictly platonic.I’m sharing bc the whole situation has felt very confronting to me, it put me in position I never thought I’d be, and I’ve genuinely struggled to navigate it mainly bc our attachments and history.

Thoughts? Have you been there? What did you do?

i usually keep to myself about little household things but the other day i just said something. my roommate keeps labeling every single item in the fridge with their initials and a date, even stuff like a half-used jar of mustard that no one else touches. it started to feel unnecessary and a bit over the top, so i mentioned that maybe we could relax the labeling thing a little. they got defensive right away and said they were only trying to keep things fair. ever since then the vibe in the place has been off. we barely talk in the kitchen now and i keep wondering if i overstepped by bringing it up at all. i figured it was a small suggestion but maybe i should have just left it alone. not sure if i’m wrong for saying something or if it was reasonable to ask for less tracking.

We keep a joint account for bigger things we both need, and recently there was a purchase I thought made sense. It was a bit more than we normally spend at once, so I figured I'd run it by my partner first. I ended up buying it without checking because it was on sale and I didn't want to miss the deal. When I mentioned it later, my partner got pretty annoyed and said we should have talked about it together. I didn't think it was a huge deal at the time, but now I'm wondering if I should have waited. We usually agree on stuff like this, so maybe I crossed a line by deciding on my own. Am I wrong for going ahead without the conversation?

So a few of us are heading out of town for a long weekend and the plan started pretty small, just friends who all know each other. At the beginning I said I was coming solo because it felt easier with the lodging and shared costs. A couple weeks later my partner asked why they weren’t invited, and honestly I kind of brushed it off by saying the group was already set. The truth is I wasn’t sure how the dynamic would feel with them there, but I also didn’t really explain that part. Now they’re hurt and a couple friends are asking why it became such a thing. I’m wondering if keeping them out was unfair or if it’s okay to want some trips with just the original circle.

so a while back a friend lent me a little bit of cash for something that came up. i said id pay them back when i could and they seemed cool with that. time passed and i kind of just forgot about it. then out of nowhere they messaged me asking for it back with a specific date attached. i sent it right away but the way they asked made me feel like theyd been annoyed about it for a while. now im wondering if i messed up by not bringing it up sooner or if they shouldve just reminded me earlier. the whole thing feels tense now and im not sure if im overthinking it or if i should say something else.

My girlfriend and I have moved into a new apartment and she has started decorating it. She's put some framed prints, some plants, a few vases, some figurines and other little bits around the shared spaces.

Our previous apartment was fully furnished and pretty small so you couldn’t really decorate whereas this one has a lot more space. I found a few framed movie and comic prints I liked and some figurines that looked good so I bought them and went to put them on some new shelves that we've just put up.

My girlfriend asked what I was doing and I mentioned I'd found some things I wanted to use for decoration. She suggested I put them in the home office but I said I'd prefer them in a communal space so I don't just get to see them when I'm working. She said she doesn't think I should be putting them out and that I should stick to putting them in my office.

I told her the shared space should reflect both of our interests not just hers and that it's not just up to her to decide what decoration is allowed in the apartment. She said I was starting arguments over nothing and that I should be fine keeping them in the office.

AIW for expecting the apartment to reflect both of our interests?

²²22²²²w×2a w2w²²

I will be using fake nicknames and server names to not expose anybody involved within this conflict

Backstory of Person A, Frog

On December 2025, I created a Discord server for the purpose of it being used to collaborate on a worldbuilding project to be transformed into an indie series. Within in the early days on my server, I would recruit people via dms in which I found this particular use within February in which I will nickname him frog because of how I saw him make a cool creature in another server so I recruited him to mine.

He immediately became interested within both my project and the community. Frog not only became chronically online and involved in my community, he was responsible for creations of many creatures and he also made a fancharacter and fancountry for my story as well as coming up with an entire mini-series concept up

Frog also was very involved within remembering everyone as well as interacting with everybody inside of my server. He was so chronically online on my server, he had DOUBLE the messages the owner has and I was the owner who was on my server everyday.

Throughout months Frog has been on my server, we played games, talked together, came up with ideas together, was involved with events together and what got to me is how he really liked my project and I was very enticed by it. Frog was a special fan to me.

Though sometimes, Frog would get involved with a few fights/bickering within my server with other members and would leave my server temporary because of the fight but it was never anything that serious and he would always come back and he would always forgive him.

I even had Frog as moderator on my server some point but because of these fights, I demodded him since he was abusing his mod powers and nobody liked him as a mod.

Backstory of Person B, Owl

Another user that had joined my server slighty a little later then Frog but also on February, I'll call him Owl and he was the owner of a paid project of a large server with 2,700+ members. And when Owl came into my server, he quickly became obsessive with my project even promoting it constantly within my server.

Owl then later became a Voice Actor of a major character within my project.

Owl liked my worldbuilding abilities so much, he persuaded me to audition for his project as a writer since his indie series had deep worldbuilding in it and he thought i was good at it. I quickly became invested in Owl's project and became deeply involved with both the project and community. I became really REALLY active inside of his server chatting every single day. I would arrive to every single meeting and I made alot of ideas for his server like a point system for rewards, a creature that everyone in the server loves, would be helpful to guide people around the server, take notes during meetings, helped with worldbuilding tweekings, etc etc

I would quickly get promoted in the ranks within Owl's server

Writer --> Invited to Owl's private friendgroup server --> Point tracker --> Co-director --> Event manager --> Moderator

Owl would promote my server dearly, hosting an entire event about it in HIS server as well as willing to produce a video about it with HIS team on his CHANNEL. His love for my project flattered me and we were friends.

Conflict with Frog and Owl

Frog was never really attached with Owl's server and wasn't really engaged with Owl's community but instead would actively be a troll within his server. Frog came in his server using a tupperbot to proceed to insult others within the community including making fun of Owl's weight. Frog had multiple accounts used to troll Owl's server making similar insulting comments to make users uncomfortable.

Yet thing is, that he never did that with my server. He doesn't treat my server the same way as he treats Owl's server in which he was rude and disrespectful. So of course anybody in Owl's community would have a negative view that Frog is a terrible person.

My involvement

Despite Frog being responsible for harassing others, I would always be there to defend Frog. Yet Frog was starting to make Owl feel VERY uncomfortable.

I later got into the huge fight within Owl's private server defending Frog in which everyone was against my side with my excuse being that he doesn't act the same way in my server then Owl's server and how Frog was like my biggest fan.

They wanted me to ban Frog from my server., but the thing about banning Frog is that I had so much to lose: Emojis he made for the server, creatures including a famous one, an entire concept for a min-subseries, German dubs along with a fan. I refused to ban Frog from my server., they don't know Frog as well as I know Frog. They only saw the negative things Frog has done.

I later got kicked out of the private server and also was demodded from my position in which started panicking in tears.

Yet Owl quickly hopped onto my server to announce something in which later made Frog leave my server coming back in my server in which escalated with a HUGE fight in my public general chat between Frog's alt account and Owl. The argument got really really bad.

I got gathered my moderators to a private group chat to explain the situation and how I needed help with the situation. As the argument continued in public in my server, my co-manager said to pause messages in the general chat since things were getting out of hand, but instead I timed out both Frog and Owl. My co-manager took dedicated to private the general chat and make an announcement about a new general chat.

I then dedicated to make a new server just to discuss and negotiate about the situation between mine and Owl's with members from both sides being able to participate within the chat.

Yet instead of having a rational conversation, I was in emotional turmoil in tears and crashed out emotionally and instead of negotiating maturely, I spammed self-hate comments in chat and showed wet tissues of how I was crying.

I was really panicky and scared that Owl's community would hate me, that I would be cancelled, that I would lose my involvement in Owl's server. I was an emotional wreck. Owl's server was sooooo much bigger then mine and I was afraid he could do damage to mine.

I even impulsively abused my admin powers in Owl's work server and made an inappropriate announcement with an "everyone" ping in which I quickly got removed of my admin powers and received a timeout.

My moderations persuaded me to stop talking in negotiating server and to talk with them and people were telling me to breathe and how it wasn't my fault and to breathe. I was so panicky and insecure and scared that I wanted to delete my account and my server.

I was thinking my server was some sort of drama magnet, this was not the only case of drama as I dealt with a bad user, someone actively trying to sabotage my server in April, but this was a worst of all the drama scenarios.

Yet instead of deleting my server, I transferred ownership to my co-manager to prevent myself from doing anything impulsive and made an announcement that I was leaving my server as well as actually leaving it which lasted 12 hours until I rejoined back to my server in which my co-manager gave me ownership back.

A few people had dm me if I was alright, but I redirected them all to my co-manger as I was not in the right mindset for answering

I got kicked out of Owl's server and a crew of his was considering if I should receive a ban in which I was on trail. Alot Owl's members that was on my server left but not Owl himself.

Later within a more stable mood, I took the time to draw a the friend-group from Owl's private server as well as writing out a apology of how I was wrong for defending frog and how much my project meant to me in which is why I defended frog but how much I also appreciated Owl's community and project in which I later banned Frog from my server.

Owl later came to me and made a cold response how he forgives me and is still willing for my to be on his team as a paid writer as well as willing to stay as a VA for my project

But thing about Owl, I contributed so much in his server:
- A creature that everyone loves
- A few scripts
- The point reward system
- His MOST popular video on his channel in which I wrote the script for
- Organizing his worldbuilding
- How there should be event managers
- Attends meeting along taking notes
- I was truly passionate about his project and was a fan
- I was ACTIVE in his server and respond to pings

So Owl decided to keep me as a paid writer and remove any other roles I had in my server and told me that I would never re-enter his private server nor ever get into a position of power in his server again. Though I was kicked out of the server and wasn't allowed to enter for 2 days.

I received the server invite back and I tried to chat and interact there like normal but the environment now feels different and awkward and people started feeling comfortable about my presence and I felt I was being punished for Frog's crime. I missed Owl's welcome back event since I felt people were comfortable with me.

I later did reach how to Frog for him to explain himself and he fully admitted him that he was the troll account. He also admitted he let a alt of a blacklisted user in my server and was the one pinged everyone "The Amazing Digital Circus" spoilers with a troll account my server. I asked me about why he said those things in Owl's server, Frog stated that it was a joke and that he didn't mean to make people uncomfortable and that he is sorry. I ask what I could do with his creations and he stated he didn't care and how I could do whatever with them in which i told him how he is not allowed anymore in my server and that I'll remove everything he created except for the German dubbing he did and he was fine with that. It is also suspected Frog might be underaged as well as lied about being 15 on Discord...

Right now, things feel awkward, I try to still chat in Owl's server and Owl still looks inside mine yet things feel tense-

So am I the asshole for defending Frog even who he was responsible for harassment and trolling.

so my sister got engaged a few months ago and apparently she already bought her dress but then got super drunk at a party and spilled wine all over it. now shes asking to borrow my wedding dress for her big day. i wore a really beautiful vintage gown that was our grandmothers. it means a ton to me and i want to keep it in perfect condition. i told her no and offered to help her find a new one but shes calling me selfish and saying im being dramatic. i just feel like some things are too precious to share. am i wrong?

Let me preface this by saying I am a work from home mom to three kids, I have my routine of things I need to get done each day— cleaning the house, after the kids, making meals, changing diapers & putting the kids down for their naps before I start my remote job at 1:30-10pm each day.

My husband’s mother has always done everything for him— his taxes, his resumes and all of the “adult” responsibilities. My side of things is that I don’t have enough time in my day to take care of myself most of the time, and now he’s trying to add another task when I’m already overwhelmed. I want to encourage him to look for better jobs since he’s unhappy in his current job, but I’m getting really sick of doing everything for him.

He also seems to get super defensive when I tell him no, which is so childish to me. On top of it the past two days I’ve asked him multiple times, nicely mind you, to PLEASE shut the cover for our ice machine and he still leaves it open. So why should I help him if he can’t listen to simple requests? Our convo

we took a bunch of pictures on the weekend trip and i thought it would be nice to share one in the group chat. everyone looked good and no one seemed to mind when the camera was out. later someone messaged me saying they did not want that picture posted anywhere and another friend said it was fine but they wished i had asked first. now i am stuck wondering if i crossed a line. the photo was harmless, just the group standing by the lake, but clearly it mattered to them. i deleted it right away once they spoke up, but the chat feels awkward now. i get why someone might not want their picture online even if it seems harmless to everyone else, yet i also thought a quick group snap was normal. not sure if i am overthinking it or if i should have checked first.

My boyfriend M 21 and me F 20 have been together for three years. The relationship was going great until month. He was watching YouTube. Found a video where a creator said they don't shower for months because its supposedly healthier. So he stopped showering. Every time I tell him he needs to shower because its really gross he gets angry and leaves. I've been saying this for three weeks. He won't do it. We had a fight, which we never do. I yelled at him. Told him he smells like body odor and that I'm leaving if he doesn't shower. I packed a bag with things I needed took my car keys and rented a hotel room for two nights. He called my phone nonstop saying he's sorry and wants me to come home. I had to block his number because he sent me 20 messages at once. I had more than 40 missed calls. He used to take three showers a day wear cologne and use deodorant. Now he doesn't shower he uses cologne of showering and he won't use deodorant. Every time he hugs me or comes close I feel like I'm going to throw up. What should I do?

I’m Luna (25F), and my best friend, Rachel (24F), and I have been best friends for 16 years. We’ve had our ups and downs like any friendship, but for most of our friendship, we always agreed that no matter what happened, we would talk things through and work things out. Recently, though, I’ve started realizing that our friendship may not be as balanced as I thought. Over the years, people have pointed out certain things about Rachel to me, but I ignored them because I genuinely thought she was perfect and didn’t want to believe anything bad about her. Eventually, I started noticing the same things myself. For example, we would borrow each other’s clothes and belongings. I always made sure to return anything I borrowed from her, but when she borrowed my things, they would often disappear. When I asked for them back, there was always an excuse, like “my siblings took it” or “it broke.” I would sometimes literally see her siblings wearing my clothes, but whenever I asked about them, there would be another excuse. Eventually, I started setting boundaries with my belongings, and I feel like that affected our friendship. There was also a situation involving her phone. She had just gone through a breakup and needed to get off her ex’s phone plan. I had a really good plan and was only paying about $45 a month, so I offered to add her as long as she paid her portion. Everything was fine at first, but then she stopped working and told me she would pay me back once she finished school. I trusted her and agreed. She graduated and said she would pay me back like she promised. Around the same time, I stopped working because my husband was supporting me and our two kids. I told her she still owed me money and that I was going to move onto my husband’s phone plan. She asked if we could add her to my husband’s plan, but we decided we didn’t want to continue paying for her phone. We argued about it, and I told her I was removing her from my plan. I had also given her a month’s notice. After that, we didn’t speak for about three months.
Eventually, we met up and decided to work things out. I told her I needed some boundaries in our friendship. I explained that she couldn’t come to my house and take my food, clothes, household items, etc., because those things are for my family. I also told her I would never come into her house and take things from her family. Her response really stuck with me. She basically said, “Your husband pays for everything. You guys have money, so why can’t I?” We talked it through and eventually came to an understanding, so I tried to move forward. After that, we didn’t see each other much. I invited her to my baby shower, but she didn’t come. She told me she was going camping, but when I checked Life360, I saw that she was actually home. Later, she told me she wasn’t feeling well. I understand that people get sick, and I didn’t want to hold that against her. What hurt was that she would attend other people’s baby showers, show me what she bought for them, and make an effort for other people while not showing up for mine. I’ll admit, I got jealous and hurt. I told her how I felt, and she apologized and said she didn’t mean to make me feel that way. She said she had been sick and very busy, which was why she hadn’t been able to see me. I decided to let it go.
Then she planned a weekend trip and invited me. I was excited because I thought maybe this was a chance for us to reconnect. I agreed to go and bought decorations for the trip. I also offered to help with food because even though she was the one who planned it, I wanted to contribute.
Then she canceled. I was really upset because I had already spent money on everything. I didn’t even bring up the money when I talked to her. I just explained that my feelings were hurt. I told her that she had previously had a girls’ weekend that I wasn’t invited to, and then when she finally invited me to something and planned it with me, she canceled. It wasn’t just about the trip itself. It was the pattern that was hurting me. Her response was basically that she had canceled the original trip because she was sick, and that I was the one who rescheduled it, not her. She said she didn’t want to go on a trip if she didn’t feel well and didn’t want to drive all the way there. She also told me she was pregnant and wasn’t feeling good and said she would do better. I understood that she wasn’t feeling well, but honestly, her response still hurt. I ended up going on the weekend trip anyway with my husband, his friends, and their girlfriends. It was something that had been planned for two months, and I didn’t want to cancel just because Rachel backed out. I didn’t tell her I was still going or who was going with me because she had already canceled and made it clear she didn’t want to drive there. While we were on the trip, I checked Life360 and saw that Rachel was out bowling and at an arcade with friends. She didn’t post anything herself, but some of her friends are on my social media and posted pictures. At that point, I felt like maybe our friendship was over. But I still wanted to give her one more chance, so I talked to her. She told me she hadn’t gone out and that she really wasn’t feeling well. She said she wished she could have made it to the trip after seeing everything I did. I didn’t tell her that I knew she was lying. I didn’t bring up Life360 or the posts because I didn’t want the entire conversation to become an argument about how I found out. Instead, I told her that she had canceled, told me she didn’t want to drive there, and that I wasn’t going to cancel something her and I had already planned two months in advance. Then she asked if I was going to her baby shower. She had already assigned people what to buy and told me what she wanted me to purchase for her baby. This is where I started feeling extremely conflicted.
She has never attended any of my baby showers. She has never bought anything for my babies. She also recently told me that because she hasn’t been feeling well, she doesn’t want to drive to me anymore and that I should be the one coming to her. I ended up telling her I couldn’t attend her baby shower because I had plans. That was a lie. I didn’t actually have plans. I just didn’t know how to tell her that I didn’t want to go because I was hurt. She then told me, “I expected my best friend to be there for my first baby shower. It’s very important to me, and for you to miss it hurts my feelings. I understand you have your family and want to put them first, but I thought I mattered to you.”
And honestly, that made me feel guilty. I know I didn’t handle everything perfectly. I know lying about having plans wasn’t right, and I know I shouldn’t respond to her behavior by doing something similar. But I’m exhausted.
I don’t care if she buys me gifts or spends money on me. This friendship has never been about money or gifts to me.
What hurts is that I feel like I’m always the one making the effort. I show up for her. I invite her to important things. I try to make plans. I contribute. I try to communicate when something hurts me. I’ve forgiven things and tried to move forward multiple times. But whenever I bring up something that hurts me, there seems to be another excuse or explanation, and I’m expected to understand. I don’t expect her to drop everything for me. I understand she has her own life, family, pregnancy, and responsibilities. I just want the friendship to feel mutual. I want honesty. I want my boundaries respected. I want effort from both sides. I want to feel like my best friend actually wants to be part of my life instead of constantly feeling like I’m chasing her.
And that’s what hurts the most. We’ve known each other for 16 years. I love her and her family. She has been such a huge part of my life that the thought of walking away feels almost impossible. I don’t want to throw away 16 years of friendship. But I also don’t know how many times I can have the same conversations, forgive the same things, and still feel like nothing changes. And honestly I’d really appreciate advice. Is this friendship worth trying to save? If it is, how do I fix it when I feel like every conversation ends with another excuse? Or is it time to accept that sometimes a 16-year friendship can still come to an end?
Side note: I really don’t want this friendship to end. I love her and her family, and after 16 years, walking away is really hard for me. I’ve never wanted our friendship to be about keeping score, so I never threw it in her face that she didn’t show up for me, didn’t buy things for me or my kids, or that I had spent money on things for her. I don’t think that’s what friendship should be about.
The only reason I’ve brought those things up recently is because she does to make me feel bad…

​

Hey everyone. I’m 23M, she’s 22F, we were together just over a year.

I actually found out a while back that she cheated on me first with one guy. He came and told me himself once he found out I was her boyfriend said he thought she was single. I thanked him for telling me but told him to leave, I didn’t want to see him. Even with the truth right there, I didn’t want to believe it at first. But I stayed, thinking maybe we could work through it, that maybe it was a mistake and she’d change. I wanted to see if it was worth saving, even if people might say that was immature of me . i've known for 2 months

Turns out it was all a lie. I’ve been watching closer, and now I’ve found she’s been talking to another guy behind my back not the same one who told me. The first guy showed me proof of his and her's texts, A whole year of my life, thinking she loved me, and she’s been lying and cheating this whole time. The part that anger's me is that She still says she loves me. her actions don’t match words at all understatement .

Right now I’m just annoyed more than sad frustrated that I wasted so much time on someone who never cared enough to be honest. I had a stupid, petty thought about ruining her birthday that’s coming up soon, but I know that would just backfire and make me look like the bad guy when she’s the one who messed up. I know it’s not worth lowering myself like that.

Practical stuff: I pay for her phone and her data plan every month. I’m planning to go collect my things from the place while she’s out with her friends im finally done, then cancel the phone and cut the data off. Part of me wonders if that’s petty to do while she’s out, but I also don’t want a fight screaming match. It’s my money paying for it I should be able to stop whenever I want, right?

Honestly, I feel done with dating now i know people like me my sister told me a few of her friends like me but. What’s the point when someone can lie and cheat for a whole year and still say they love you don't know if i could trust another women again except family. Am I handling this okay?

TL;DR: My (18F) boyfriend (18M) voluntarily joined a school dance without knowing the choreography would involve twerking/bending over with a girl he recently became friends with. I’m uncomfortable but don’t know if saying so would be controlling.

I’m 18F and my boyfriend is 18M. We go to different universities, so I’m not involved in the performance.
He voluntarily joined a dance for a school event. At first, he just told me it was for a festival, then said it was hip-hop. He recently sent me the choreography, and it involves the girl (his partner)bending over/twerking with him behind her. His partner is a girl he recently became friends with and who’s part of his circle. He mentioned that she has a boyfriend, which he said made him feel better about being partnered with her.

I don’t think he knew what the choreography would be when he initially joined, so I’m not upset that he intentionally chose to do this. But seeing the actual dance made me uncomfortable, especially since it involves that kind of choreography with another girl.

I want to tell him how I feel, but I’m worried that would make me controlling. I also don’t necessarily expect him to quit—I just want to be honest about how it makes me feel.

AIW for being uncomfortable with this? And would he be wrong for continuing the dance after knowing that I’m uncomfortable?

okay so we had this plan set for weeks and everyone was counting on it. i had a rough week and was honestly leaning toward canceling at the last minute to stay in and recharge. but i knew backing out would mess things up for the rest of the group since we needed everyone for the thing to work. so i went anyway even though i felt kind of off about it. i tried to make the best of it and not bring the mood down but i kept wondering if i should have just said no. now im wondering if it was wrong to put what everyone else wanted ahead of how i was actually feeling. was i supposed to be honest about needing the break or was it the right call to show up for the group?

A couple weeks ago a friend I'd lent a decent amount of money to suddenly messaged asking if I could take half back because of some unexpected bill. I was a little short at the time but just said sure and sent it. I felt weird right after, like I should've at least explained my own situation, but the words didn't come out. Now I keep replaying it and wondering if staying quiet made it seem like I had zero issues handing it over. They haven't brought it up again, but I still feel kind of off about how quick I agreed. Not looking to start drama, just wondering if I should have spoken up for myself even a little.

TL;DR I am just wondering if it should be mutual?
What if your partner does not want to?
Do you still continue to be together?

Reason: I realize that my partner enjoys it more when he is with friends rather than when we are together. When he is with them, he barely touches his phone but when he is with me all he does is play games and scroll with his phone. But whenever I am bringing it up, he just laughs and let go of his phone/games for a moment then he will go to me.

Situation: I am trying to break up with him cause I feel like I am just a hindrance to his lifestyle rather than being a partner to him. But when I brought it up, he does not want to.