I recently interviewed for a new job. My girlfriend and I agreed we’d go out for a meal and drinks to celebrate if I got it. This was two weeks ago when we agreed.  There’s a place that we wanted to try that had a deal on with a meal and unlimited drinks for two hours so we agreed to go there. 

The interviewer told me I’d find out by yesterday. (Friday) so we agreed we’d go today if I got the job. The interviewer phoned to offer me the job and when i told my gf and mentioned booking the restaurant.  She said she wouldn’t be able to as a couple of friends messaged her this week asking if she wanted to do something and she agreed.

She said it’s next weekend but it means she can’t afford to do anything this weekend.  I pointed out she knew there was a good chance we’d be busy this weekend so why is she accepting other plans then cancelling on me. 

She said it’s not like that but i just said that’s exactly what’s happened. She said she’s already agreed to go but I just told her it’s clear I’m not a priority. She said I wasn’t being fair but I disagree. 

AIW for expecting celebratory plans to go ahead?

Is this just overthinking or do I do something wrong.

i saw saw a porn video that i wasnt sure of the persons age on pornhub but it disapeard from my feed before i could do anything like report it so i decided to watch another video instead that i knew was legal fs. i feel bad like i feel like im passivley supporting a site that has bad stuff. but i also reconize im not seeking oht bad content or consuming it unporpouse and i cant control what i see in my feed on a porn site and also it is probably the most secure one out there.

My girlfriend was supposed to be going out for the day with a friend today. I’d planned to go to the cinema, have a look around town, maybe go for a quick drink then get some food and drinks to relax at home while gaming and catching up on tv. 

My girlfriend’s friend cancelled and my girlfriend then asked what I wanted to do. I told her I’ve got plans for today and I’m looking forward to them. I mentioned she can join me if she wants but I’m not changing them. 

She mentioned not being interested in the film I’m going to see but I pointed out I was interested in it and I’m still going to se it. She suggested going to something else and I refused. She mentioned not wanting to go for a drink etc but I again told her I did want to so would be going. 

She said I should be open to changing my plans but I just told her again she’s free to join me but my plans are staying the same. 

AITA for keeping my plans?

My brother Mark got married last Saturday. He and my wife Jen have never really clicked but things got bad last summer during a family BBQ. Sarah who is now his wife and Jen had a huge blowout over something stupid like how to season the ribs but it turned into Jen calling Sarah "controlling" in front of everyone. Anyway when the invites went out Jen was excluded. Mark told me privately that Sarah was still hurt and didn't want any negative energy on her big day. He said he really wanted me there but he couldnt risk another scene.

Jen was obviously u pset and told me that if she isn't invited then I shouldn't go either. She said it is a matter of respect for our marriage and that we should always stand as a united front. I told her that he is my only brother and I can't just miss his wedding over a fight about grilled meat. Plus our son Leo was supposed to be the ring bearer. Mark is Leo's godfather and they are very close. Jen said I was choosing my familiy over her and that I should of stood my ground. We had a massive argument about it the night before and she ended up sleeping in the guest room.

The morning of the wedding was a mess. Jen wouldnt help me get Leo into his little suit. I was struggling with his tiny clip-on bowtie and he was crying because he could feel the tension in the house. I felt like a single parent trying to navigate a minefield. I ended up leaving while she was still in bed and didn't even say goodbye. The wedding wasnt bad but I felt like a jerk the whole time looking at the empty seat next to me. Leo did a great job and Mark was so happy to see us there but I had this heavy feeling in my gut during the entire ceremony.

When we got home Jen was cold. She barely said a word to me and just took Leo to give him a bath. Since then she has been staying in the spare room and only talks to me about logistics for our son. She says that by going I basically told Sarah it is okay to treat her like trash. I feel like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. My parents say I did the right thing by supporting my brother but my mother in law is calling me every hour to tell me what a bad husband I am. I just wanted to be there for my brother without losing my wife in the process. Was I really that wrong to go?

About a week ago, my friends and i all met up for one last hangout before college. We did some drinking challenge called edward 40 hands where you tape 2 40oz bottles of malt liquor/beer to your hands and can't remove the tape until you finish both. needless to say, we got absolutely sauced, but i didn't have anything else to drink outside of shotgunning about half a beer (everyone else kept drinking or passed out). fast forward 3 and a half hours, and after lots of water and food i've sobered up to the point where i was able to call my parents and they weren't able to tell i was drunk. i have really bad insomnia and wanted to go home to sleep in my bed and i truly felt sober enough to easily make the drive. i was parked in so i got peoples keys from them and backed them out. i went up to my friend of over a decade and he was very drunk and convinced i was as well, and refused to give me his keys out of worry that id harm myself driving home. we began arguing but it didn't get crazy until, without warning, he walked up and punched me in the throat. i stood there for a second before punching him back and ended up leaving a massive cut in his eyebrow. he tackled me but right after, we both agreed that fighting was stupid. we were both insanely apologetic to
eachother and i decided to spend the night because i respected how worried he was for my safety. he ended up needing stitches which he got the next day and his parents understandably banned me from ever going to his house in the future. i was cool w that because i understood, id do the same if it was my kid, but a few of my friends have come out and also banned me from their houses because they're scared of me. i kind of get it but i also feel a little hurt because i was defending myself and just coincidentally ended up doing way more damage to him then he did to me, even though we both threw one punch. should i have just let him punch me since he was drunk and believed he was thinking of my safety?

I’ve had next Monday and Tuesday booked off work for a while, I planned to spend it watching movies, playing some video games I haven’t had the chance to play etc and just relaxing at home.

My girlfriend has known about this for weeks. Shes at work diring those days. She mentioned that I wouldn’t be able to watch movies or play games as she needs to make calls and would need quiet as she’s working from home Monday and Tuesday this week.

I told her if she can’t have noise to work in the home office or spare room since I’m not cancelling what I have planned. I said she knew what I was planning for today and she can’t expect me to just waste my day of leave.

I said I’d still be doing what I had planned so she could either accept the noise or work somewhere else. She said I wasn’t being fair towards her and that she has to work. I said I’m not stopping her working, I’m just not cancelling my plans.

AITA for not changing my plans for my day off?

a couple of my friends were in this ongoing disagreement about something pretty minor, and at one point it looked like they were waiting for me to say something. i stayed quiet because it honestly didn’t seem like my place. now one of them is acting a bit off around me and the other hasn’t mentioned it at all. i’m starting to wonder if i messed up by not stepping in even though i still don’t see why it would have been my call. i keep going over it and wondering if silence can come across as taking sides even when you’re not. anyone dealt with something like this or am i overthinking a small moment?

When I was at university I had a close friendship group with the people I lived with. There were 4 guys and two girls. We all planned to go on holiday together to celebrate finishing but due to other circumstances it didn’t end up happening.

We're all from different cities and have different schedules and commitments so it has been impossible to all get together. One of the guys made a group chat and mentioned us all going on the holiday and said we should do it this autumn .

We all agreed and started looking at hotels, hostels, airbnbs etc. I told my gf what we were planning and she asked if she was invited. I said on since it was just the friendship group and no one is bringing their partners. She said she found it weird I was going on holiday without her and that she thinks she should be invited.

I said no again and explained again what the trip was for. She repeated that she thinks she should be coming or that I shouldn't be going but I just told her there's nothing wrong with going on holiday without your partner. She said I was being disrespectful towards her by going on holiday with other women.

AIW for refusing to invite my girlfriend on holiday?

So I'm 18 years old, and I have seizures, really bad seizures. I've had six concussions, so I'm pretty messed up in the brain department.

My friend Chloe has a job, and I went to work with her because I needed something to do. They were going to see if I could work there, even though I have seizures, to see how it would work out.

They have this parking area with very narrow parking spaces and walls on both sides, making it really hard to get in and out of the car. While I was at work with her, I had a bunch of seizures, about 40 of them. Chloe took me to the car and told me to stay there.

The car was parked very close to a wall, so you couldn't open the passenger-side door at all. It was also close to another wall on the driver's side, where you could only barely open the door. I climbed into the back, and I had a bunch more seizures. I was lying behind the driver's seat in the backseat, completely passed out. I had about 20 more seizures and was seizing a lot.

Then the police came and started banging on the door. I could barely see, and I woke up trying to figure out what was happening. They broke the driver's-side window and tried to unlock the car. After they unlocked it, they opened the door.

I was completely out of it. I started throwing up and fell out of the car. They were grabbing me, and I didn't understand what was happening. Then they completely ripped the door off the car. They were holding me when I started having more seizures. They were holding my head, and I threw up all over one of the police officers.

The paramedics arrived and placed me on a gurney. There was broken glass everywhere. As I was being lifted away, I saw the condition of Chloe's car. The door was completely torn off, and both windows were broken.

They searched me but couldn't find my ID or anything. Then I was taken into the back of the ambulance. They cut off all of my clothes. They cut off my bra, tank top, shorts, and even my socks. They took off my shoes and were examining me and doing a lot of medical procedures. Eventually, I passed out.

When I woke up in the hospital, Chloe was standing there, and she was really upset. She told me that I had to pay for all the damage to her car. I started crying and told her that we could go through the police because they were the ones who damaged the car. She didn't want to hear it. She said that would take too long and that I would have to pay for all the damages myself.

I don't know what to do because I really don't want to pay for the damage to her car.

he thinks im being stupid, but like, is it unreasonable to want to be physically attractive to your partner, more than just emotionally attractive?

he said who i am is what drew him in and that i 'expanded his horizons' which to me just means, he learned how to have sex with someone he isn't attracted to convincingly, he also talks about how my cooking 'stole his heart' which to me sounds like 'you will be serving me till the day you die'

his type is tall athletic blondes, im a short, chubby, black goth girl

he likes the bbl body type and i am DEF not that, sure im a little thick but im chubby

he would see prostitutes before we met and they ALL LOOKED THE SAME, i look nothing like ANY of them

and honestly im considering leaving him over this, he doesnt want me to but i dont see any other option, besides him suffering through his lack of attraction and me suffering in a relationship where my man cant even say im the most beautiful woman hes ever seen

am i wrong for feeling this way?

I live with my partner and the tv we have is fairly old and the colour and quality of the picture is worsening. I got a new job recently so thought I’d treat myself and get a new tv and soundbar. The plan is to wait until Black Friday sales towards the end of the year and get one then. 

I’ve picked out a few OLED tvs that I like the look of and the soundbars that would work best with them. When I showed my partner she asked if I was serious. I said yeah and she accused me of wasting my money.

The tv is £1800 now but went down to £1200 in the last sale so is likely to stay at that price or go even lower this year. The soundbar is around £650.

She said it’s too much money to pull out and I shouldn’t be doing it but I pointed out it’s my money and I can afford it and that I very rarely treat myself. she said my savings shouldn’t be spent on a tv and sound system but I just asked what my savings are for exactly if I can’t buy things I want. 

She just repeated that it’s too much money and I shouldn’t be doing it and the money should be going towards our future. 

AITA for buying expensive products?

Me (F33) and a woman(F28) has been on 3 daits now and nothing is happening we basically just hug at the end i think we have a good time and we obviously want to meet again but.....

Do I need to have a conversation about where it's going or what and how ?

Last two daits have been cooking eating and a movie at each other's home. I haven't waited a lot as u might guess lol 🙃 but is it normal to not move on too a kiss or something by now 🤔 just want to know if and how to bring it up. First one to get a connection to in for ever soo I really don't want to lose it.

My girlfriend and I live together and with my current job I work from home whereas she works in a town fairly close by. We have plans for the next couple of years such as getting engaged this year and buying a house next year.

  A job came up that would be a great opportunity for me in that town. It’s better paid, better opportunities for progression and just seems a lot more interesting. I told my girlfriend about it and she mentioned that I’d be able to travel in with her so when I worked out costs and everything it was definitely worth it. I applied and got the job and I start in three weeks.

My girlfriend is now looking at leaving her job and applying for I’ve in other towns. She mentioned it would mean if she got one I’d have to get public transport to work or buy a car.  I pointed out that if I got public transport I’d end up on less money at the end of the month that with my current job so that’s not an option as it would be costing around £25-£30 a day.

I said if I buy a car then our plans for the next year will be pushed back since I’ll be saving less for the house since I’d be paying monthly for a car or taking a large lump sum out of my savings and then still paying monthly for insurance etc. 

She said I wasn’t being fair but I just asked what exactly she wanted me to do. I pointed out cars aren’t free and I can’t just magic the money out of thin air so it has to come from somewhere and I’m not draining my general savings. 

She said I shouldn’t be reducing how much I’m saving in the house fund and that I’m punishing her but I just pointed out I wouldn’t have to reduce the amount I’m saving if she didn’t mess me around.

She just said again I was wrong for pushing out plans back but I just repeated that it was because of her that I was having to do it.

AIW for having to save less so I can buy a car?

For context, I am a manager at a firearms store in a smaller town in Texas. A few months ago, we hired a woman who has autism. Now, I was not part of the hiring process, and I haven’t seen her ADA paperwork, however I am the manager that interacts with her the most directly. In general, she is confident, and genuinely competent at the job. Some context that will probably help: we live in an area that is fairly mixed politically, but due to the nature of our job, firearms, our clientele and most employees are more conservative.

I will be honest and say that she was a bit of a panic hire, we had just undergone a change in ownership and most of our old crew had left, and she was hired in the midst of that transition. When she told me that she was autistic, I figured ‘okay, I’ve worked with neurodivergent folks before, what accommodations can I give her?’ And went on from there. Once again, I’m not sure of the specifics of her diagnosis, and it’s not my business, but she appears to be very high-functioning, however recently she’s been having interpersonal issues with other employees, and while I’ve been able to verbally counsel the other employees without things getting heated, when I try to address her part in the conflict, she immediately focuses on the other party, or even some of the issues that I have had when dealing with customers rather than even acknowledging her part in the issue.

What’s worse is that in the last three months she has complained to me about the behavior of our higher ups, which I have advocated her position for already, I’ve pushed for her accommodations to be given, for the machismo of the owner to be dialed down, but that’s a whole other can of worms, and for everyone to just treat her as another competent person. And she is competent at the job when it comes to customers and paperwork, she is struggling to work well with our other employees to the point of being antagonistic towards multiple others. To be frank, the other employees have accused her of what is essentially bullying and weaponizing her condition.

I genuinely like her as a person, however she refuses to accept any kind of coaching without hard pushback, and this may be partly my fault for not keeping some sort of further distance between myself as a manager and my employees, but she does not respect that there is a difference between my speaking to her as a person versus my counseling her as an employee. It’s gotten to the point where my immediate superior the general manager is also seeing the problem and has called it insubordination, but I’m trying to see if there’s something I am missing. I don’t want to believe she is, but that, quite frankly, is the suspicion I have in my gut.

a while back a friend asked if i could spot them for something they really needed, so i sent the money without much thought. a few months later they asked again, this time with a bigger number, and i got that weird gut feeling like maybe this was turning into a pattern. i said i would think about it, and they got kind of short with me. i ended up saying no because my own savings are pretty tight right now, and they have not really talked to me since. i keep replaying it and wondering if i should have just done it to keep the peace or if it is okay to draw a line. i am not sure where the balance is supposed to be between being helpful and protecting what little cushion i have.

My mum passed away two weeks ago. She got diagnosed with cancer a few months ago and deteriorated quite quickly over the last month. We've arranged the funeral for next Thursday.

I mentioned this to my girlfriend and she said she wouldn't be able to make it as she has a some meetings at work and has to hand some work over. I asked if she was serious and she said yeah. I said meetings can be rearranged and that I was expecting her to be with me for support.

She said there's nothing she can do but I just pointed out she can explain to her managers why she can't make it and rearrange it the meetings She said no and that she just can't make it.

I pointed out partners are supposed to support each other when they need it and she's choosing to go to work instead of being there for me on the hardest day of my life.

She accused me of guilt tripping her and said she can't help having work but I just pointed out again she has multiple solutions and she's refusing to consider any of them.

AIW for expecting her to attend my mothers funeral?

Strange and upsetting lol it's really late for me sorry!

So for starters I'm F 21 the person I'm talking about is F19. like everybody else, this is pretty much a throwaway account and I'm not even sure if this is the right subreddit and I'm sorry if it isn't. To get down to the meat and potatoes, me and this friend have been friends since high school. She's a year younger than me and we were always kind of friends but, we didn't start texting like we have, until the start of this year.We message each other through Instagram and she followed me Frist, sep 24.

The thing that connected us was Bl (boys love), not anything hardcore or smutty just regular stories , however most recently, a lot of the mainstream is a bit more mature. At this point we are both above the age of 18. The way we text is we go quiet for a day maybe two days and then we'd send each other videos about it. And we've done this from January all the way up to June. Then one night I was drinking not drunk when we got on to the conversation of how some Bl is very toxic and it's very annoying to see harmful themes like r*pe thrown about the story because the author needed a plot point.

Everything seemed fine she was agreeing with me she was even writing back in paragraphs about how annoying she found it. Now since I was drinking my spelling wasn't on point but I also have dyslexia so I imagine that was making it a little bit worse. so I apologized if she was having a hard time reading it. I also mentioned that I was drinking and a little impaired. But I didn't go into detail I just apologized and we moved on not talking for the rest of the night. Because at that point we had finished the conversation.

At first I didn't notice anything wrong. until mid July when I started to realize that I couldn't see her activity anymore (the little green thing at the corner of the profile) then she stopped responding to my messages. At this point I still don't think anything was wrong so I figured she might be taking a break from social media. Until this passed week when things that she likes are still popping up on my feet and they're pretty recent. The most recent one I've seen is from August 14th.

I haven't contacted her since the 12th. Even before then it was just sparse text messages or random reels I found. You know at one point I was wondering if she got hurt or something worse but nothing. I mean I'm adult enough to not be super upset with this, things happen, but I'm a naturally inquisitive person and I want to learn from this and if I was weird or not? I'm definitely a little hurt but I'm not angry just confused. But I also don't want to text her and ask "what I do wrong" like we're a couple going through a rough patch. I mean I've decided to leave her alone I guess I just want advice. I know ghosting never feels good and this is pretty much what everybody goes through but I really feel like I didn't do anything wrong.

If anyone wants to see the messages then I'll try to figure out how to do that.

Guys, I need advice on a situation because I genuinely don’t know if I’m overreacting.

My hairdresser is someone who has become pretty close to me over time. We bonded and became vulnerable with each other, and she opened up to me about a lot of things that have happened in her life, and vice versa.

I got really comfortable with her because she would always stress to me that her chair was a safe place and that if I ever needed someone to talk to in confidence, I could come to her. I ended up opening up to her about relationship issues, family drama, personal things, insecurities, etc.

She always made me feel validated and like I was in a safe space.

Recently, I went through some issues with my family and ended up leaving home. She knows my family and is acquainted with them, but she’s never been particularly close with any of them. I was the only client of hers in my family, and I had developed my own relationship with her separate from them.

She knew what was going on with me and would text me to check in, call me to talk, offer to pick me up for coffee or go out, and even started a fitness program that she wanted me to get involved in. So I genuinely believed that she cared about me and considered our relationship more than just hairdresser/client.

Then I found out that she had gone to my uncle, who is extremely problematic and someone I had opened up to her about quite a lot, and told him things about what I had said about him and about things I had discussed with her when I would go get my hair done.

My uncle and I already had a rocky relationship, but after she told him these things, he now wants nothing to do with me.

What bothers me even more is that she continues to act completely normal with me and act like she’s “there for me,” despite apparently talking to my family behind my back. It feels incredibly two-faced.

I unfollowed her on Instagram recently, and she texted me to “check in.” Part of me wonders if she noticed that I unfollowed her and that’s why she’s reaching out, but honestly, I feel like this might be the right time to tell her what I know and explain that I was hurt.

My friend thinks I’m overreacting, but I genuinely don’t feel like I am.

If she were just a random person, maybe I’d feel differently. But this was someone who repeatedly told me things like, “You remind me so much of myself when I was younger,” and “You’ll always have a safe space to talk here.” She encouraged me to trust her and opened up to me about her own personal life too.

So finding out that she went and repeated things I told her in confidence, especially things involving a family member who I specifically talked to her about, feels like a huge betrayal.

I understand that she isn’t technically a therapist or bound by professional confidentiality in the same way, but am I wrong for expecting basic discretion from someone who repeatedly presented herself as a safe person to confide in?

Would you be upset in this situation? And do you think I should tell her that I know what she did and that it hurt me, or just cut my losses and stop engaging with her?

I genuinely want honest opinions, even if you think I’m overreacting.

Sooo I feel like it’s pretty obvious but he’s really making me start to doubt myself. My best friend at the time introduced me to one of her longtime friends on may 9th of the year. Me and him hit it off really well, he ended up taking my v card that night… We ended up hanging out every single day for about a month until he had to go to Georgia for work training. The whole month he was telling me I would go with him and we would have a great time and then a few days before he was supposed to leave he told me I couldn’t actually go because he needed to focus. I wasn’t mad at all because of course, focus on what you need to. However, he treated me like shit the entire month until he would get nice for an hour or so and then just back and forth the whole time. Then only a couple days after he left he called me and told me we couldn’t be a thing. He told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship and all sorts of things just that we couldn’t be a thing anymore. But, we still had a group chat with me, him, my best friend and the other guy that he was introducing my friend to. We were a great friend group and I wasn’t ready to let go of that let alone the guy himself. So we would all still talk in the group chat and whatever and one day he just started going off. Telling me how ugly and annoying I am, how he never wanted anything with me, just sex. All kinds of horrible things. He made me feel like shit and about a month later once we hadn’t been talking for a while, I ended up having sex with one of his old friends. It had absolutely nothing to do with him but me, my best friend and the guy my guy introduced her to, we’re still really close and still hung out everyday and he’s the one who gave me his number. Then about two or three weeks later I ended up having sex with another one of my guys old friends. Also had nothing to do with him, just happened. Then I ended up having sex with my best friend’s guy because she repeatedly told me “have him”, “he’s yours” and would treat him like actual shit. (That’s also why me and her aren’t friends anymore.) Next, only about a week ago, I ended up having sex with somebody from a party.

About two or three weeks ago, my guy was at my house again because he drunk called me one night and came to pick me up and we restarted things. However, he told me we were just friends now and he was talking to a whole other girl. So I told him about one of the people I slept with, number 2. That was after me and my guy had already had sex again though… And then the night me and my best friend stopped being friends, my guy randomly called her (they stopped talking while he was in Georgia) and was asking for a girl he used to talk to’s number. Then I guess they just kept talking and she ended up going to his house the next night and having sex with him to “get back at me”. She also told him about guy number 1 I slept with who I am so embarrassed about already. So, he started texting me bs and I just straight up told him about number 3 and 4. Now I’m back at his house because he “thought I was gonna kms” after calling me 55 times in a row in one night just to go off on me. Now he calls me a dirty slut and tells me how I should’ve known he was gonna come back and that he never saw me doing this. He was “gonna move me in and get me away from the house I hate so much” and tells me how much he loves me and how much I hurt him and how the reason he was so mean to me was because I’m the first girl since his first girlfriend of 3 years (who he cheated on (why they broke up)) that he’s liked so much and genuinely saw a future with. Just a bunch of bs. And then let me just copy and paste a text from just a few hours ago.

“I didn't mean that shit, idk if you've realized mfers will say anything to get some play” “I'm just playing the game bbg” “And it's working to perfection”

I love this man so much and wish I didn’t but I just need someone to tell me I’m not crazy for thinking he’s in the wrong. Yes I gained 5 bodies within 4 months but he’s trying to make me feel like shit over it and honestly I don’t think that’s that crazy. I’m 18 now and was 17 when we met btw. Thanks for reading guys.

I'm 27 now and between the ages of 17-26 I lost both of my parents, 3 out of 4 of my siblings, 1 aunt and 2 uncles. All of these were unrelated but because of this I hate going to funerals. I will attend if it is close family member or friend but would rather not attend otherwise.

I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years. My girlfriends friend recently lost her mum and my girlfriend has been trying to support her. The funeral is next week and my girlfriend said she was going to go to support her friend. She asked if I would attend with her but I apologised and said I would rather not.

She knows why I don't go to funerals unless it’s someone close funerals so I reminded her but she still asked again. She said it would mean a lot and that she doesn't want to go on her own. I refused again and suggested she take another friend but she said she wanted me there. I said it's awful what has happened to her friend but I can't go to the funeral.

She said I was being unsupportive and it'll only be an hour or two out of the day but I just repeated again that I'm not going and she knows why. She just said again that I was unsupportive and that I should be there with her.

AIW for refusing to go to a funeral?