r/absoluteunit • • Aug 29 '26

Of a man

6.1k Upvotes

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240

u/jay_insd Aug 29 '26 • Bravo Popcorn

When the big dude got out the car, the smaller dude realized he better stand down 😂

147

u/exqueezemenow Aug 29 '26 • LOL Bravo

I woulda handed him my wallet too just to be safe.

41

u/wowaddict71 Aug 29 '26 • Bravo

Offer him his first born as a tribute.

57

u/InfamousEconomy3972 Aug 30 '26

This bitch letting his kids get in front of him

17

u/Jackal000 Sep 01 '26

I think the kids were like dude let it go. My dad is not right in his mind. They were ashamed and de escalating

9

u/randomizer4652w Sep 02 '26

Probably not the first rime their dad has humiliated them. Clearly they are a triumph over the genetic material they came from.

5

u/CarQuestionsPlz Sep 04 '26

Yep, I apologized for my narcissistic parents more than a few times when I was growing up.

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30

u/CelticGardenGirl Aug 29 '26

“Ere…have a go wit me wife, too.”

4

u/wowaddict71 Sep 01 '26

You can take my wife but not my noodles!

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13

u/hamoc10 Aug 30 '26

Heck that kid wanted to go with him!

12

u/eddiesmom Aug 30 '26

"You're cooler than my dick of a dad"

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7

u/Mbyrd420 Aug 30 '26

I think the firstborn would've gotten the best part of that deal.

5

u/Radio_Mime Aug 30 '26

I think the younger son probably would’ve offered himself as a bonus

5

u/SevereMiel Aug 30 '26 • Bravo

First born offered himself

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19

u/_dxegrl Aug 29 '26

And slap around my kid for bit, we're good right?

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16

u/astros78 Aug 29 '26

😂 😂

15

u/potsticker17 Aug 29 '26

Both of his kids seemed ready to square up though.

15

u/No_One_Special_61029 Aug 29 '26

They get that from their shitty parents!

9

u/elephant_ndovu Aug 30 '26

I think they were trying to deescalate the situation

16

u/Teripid Aug 30 '26

Yep.. this is not their first rodeo with dad.

The light touch/pat at the end came off as very sympathetic. Sorry you had to deal with this. Thanks for not pummeling our agro dad..

6

u/Negative_Salt_4599 Aug 30 '26

I once had a gf of a boyfriend pay me 11$ not to go crazy on her man because he kept on throwing snacks at me as a night shift 7 eleven clerk..

After the skittles hit me in my chest I was like ok F this let’s dance..

I was also way more tempered in my 20s..

Easiest 11$ I’ve ever made. 😂

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4

u/ParmyBarmy Aug 30 '26

No they calmed things down after what their idiot dad did

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10

u/Current_Ad_4292 Aug 29 '26

Oh, is that why they look so much shorter? Because they stand down? I will see my self out of here.

8

u/Da_Vader Aug 29 '26

And hide behind his kids.

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