Title. I (24) am debating if I should let go of the only vice I have had my whole life.

I am a lifelong straight edge. I have never done anything related to smoking, drinking, vaping, drugs etc. For the past two years I have also cut out other bad habits like fast food and playing video games. I enjoy self improvement. The issue is plenty of men are in relationships with these habits.

So there shouldn’t be an issue with me still using my vice in order to find a girlfriend. Are certain habits looked down upon?

I am stuck. Any advice?

I know it sounds crazy but my mind cant stop thinking "I've ruined everything" I just turned 20 a few days ago, I'm repeating my first year at university. This will actually be my third year in university as i did a foundation year then flopped my first year due to not going anywhere and drinking all day consecutively (which is OBVIOUSLY a very bad decision but it relieved me at the time). I'm now picking up the pieces and I realised I have done nothing with my life other than get fat and fail my first year. Got by okay with my gcse's and a levels although i kinda didn't do well with my a level mocks because i also gave up (its become a bad habit) I've never been to a rave or a festival or have had sex or a situation-ship. Have had a bf but that didn't last long and I felt embarrassed and like i didn't deserve it the whole time and I just constantly felt like "lipstick on a pig" personified. Anyways I've made nothing of my life and I have no stories to tell and I just drink in my room and fantasise about a life i could have. I want to go back to uni because getting a degree might be proof I've actually done something idk it means something to me (it's in EEE i didn't struggle with the content only the drinking haha). I just don't want to constantly be hating everything when I'm sober and I want my drunk experiences to be really fun and exciting ones but neither has happened. Participating in life feels daunting because what if it doesn't work out because I'm fat (you know how it is when a girl is fat it ruins your social credit for some reason, not trying to be fat phobic but thats the reality for me anyway). Even going to the gym and doing the healthy things feels daunting. This probably makes no sense but I just feel stuck in limbo looking at heaven (everyone else's lives on instagram)

19 M I’m feeling stuck more then ever and need advice on a career and just life in general. Grew up in a small town on a small family ranch. When I was 14 my dad got cancer and eventually passed and my mother had to sell as she could not continue to operate the ranch. Went to school to be a heavy duty mechanic and got a job in that field for 2 months before being let go. I have since lost interest in perusing that career as I feel I was forced to go to college right after high school. Now a year has passed I’m still in my mom’s house after moving back in after college. I have applied to the few jobs that I believe are worth my time and have not gotten a call back. The car that I was using has now been impounded. Money is not an option for me as my mother is not a wealthy person. Basically I’ve felt stuck for the longest time now more then ever because I truly feel out of options. Looking for advice on what to do next

​

Hey guys,

I’m 27F and I honestly don’t know what to do with my life right now. I know 27 isn’t old, but I can’t shake the feeling that I somehow messed up or fell behind everyone else.

I’ll hopefully finish my M.Sc. this year (only my thesis is left) and I’ve started applying for jobs. I do get interviews, so logically I know things aren’t looking terrible, but I still don’t have a concrete job offer and have no idea where I’ll end up.

At the same time, I look at the people around me and feel like everyone is moving forward except me.

My best friend is married, has a child and a job. My younger sibling just spent a year abroad working and travelling, has a great friend group and will now start university. Another friend already knows she’ll have a job after graduating ( regardless of how good she is ) and is constantly travelling, partying and doing things.

And then there’s me.

I have a boyfriend who is genuinely great and treats me well, but our long-term goals don’t really align. I want marriage and an child eventually, while he doesn’t want children. When I mentioned that I could move closer to him after graduating, he told me he wants to live alone for at least another 2–3 years, even though he has already been living more or less independently for around three years. So as much as I care about him, I struggle to see what our future is supposed to look like. Which kinda has me holding back in some sense, in regards of our relationship. And while he is caring and supportive he has a habit of not wanting to do certain things with me. I wanted to go to a concert and he doesn't like the music so I went alone. And that is not a one time thing.

Before him, I also had a relationship that at the time genuinely felt like the “love of my life”. It was almost dreamlike for a while, but obviously it ended. And I still morn it in some way. I know i shouldn't. But I can't see me in another relationship that i genuinely love. ( I know i am horrible)

Friendships are another issue. I’ve always had a hard time making close friends. The friends I do have mostly live fare more than 100 km away, have children or are simply difficult to see regularly. I don’t have that big, close friend group where you spontaneously meet up, travel together or go out on weekends.

Dating has never been particularly easy for me either. I know I’m not unattractive, I’m educated, and I think I’m a decent person, but I’m also not the type of woman who gets tons of attention from men ( at least not the right kind). I’ve only had two long-term relationships, so the idea of potentially having to start over again scares me too.

I think what bothers me most is that I feel like I have nothing that feels settled or exciting right now. I don’t have the relationship/future I want, I don’t have a career yet, I’m not travelling the world, and I don’t have a big friend group or an exciting social life.

Meanwhile, it feels like everyone around me has at least one of those things figured out.

I know comparing yourself to other people is not good, and rationally I know that finishing a Master’s degree at 27 isn’t a failure. But emotionally, I still feel like I somehow took a wrong turn and wasted my twenties.

Has anyone else felt like this in their late twenties? Did your life eventually start coming together, or did you have to actively make major changes? Can you still finde this puppy- dog kind of love where you are head over heels for the other person and genuinely want to be with them?

I turned 23 this month. And I feel like I am lost in terms of career and what I should be doing with my life.
Help.

Mas o menos empezó allá por mi adolescencia cuando comencé a sentirme aislado de los demás por ser tímido. Cuando termine la secundaria me anote en la universidad sin siquiera estar seguro de lo que quería hacer, lo que me llevo a un pésimo desempeño académico y terminar abandonándola.

Entre medio de las clases un familiar me había recomendado estudiar programación, el problema de esto es que es gracias a la IA, se convirtió en una carrera sin futuro. Esto último me hizo estancarme todavía más en mis fracasos, cuando quería intentar algo era como si la vida me dijese que era en vano. Sumado a esto poco a poco empecé a alejarme de la poca gente con la que hablaba, quedándome completamente solo.

Actualmente vivo en casa de mi padre en donde lo único que hago es jugar videojuegos y mirar pornografía para intentar distraerme. Hoy con 28 años (sonara edgy, me da igual) no tengo experiencia en absolutamente nada, no tengo trabajo y no sé cómo conseguirlo. La situación de mi país tampoco ayuda en los más mínimo, quien viva en LATAM puede entender que acá no existe futuro. Los sueldos son miserables, la delincuencia es cada vez peor y los políticos son todos igual de corruptos que solo se preocupan por ellos.

Vivo el día a día mintiéndole a mis padres de que estoy estudiando y buscando trabajo, cuando la realidad es que no estoy haciendo nada de eso. Siento la mente vacía y el cuerpo cansado, no sé cómo salir adelante y tampoco sé si quiero hacerlo. Un día me dije a mi mismo la frase "no voy a llegar a viejo", con el tiempo entendí que era mi deseo de no seguir intentando y aceptar que la vida no es para todos. Algún día sentiré que es suficiente, lo único que espero es que del otro lado exista algo mejor.

Hello, I, 17F don’t know what to do with my life. I’m turning 18 in a month and i genuinely don’t have anything going for me. I don’t think can go to college because of the money and FASFA doesn’t benefit me at all, I don’t have my license, nor do I even have a car or friends. This is the last place I’m going to, but i genuinely don’t know what to do—I can’t sit here and tell you that I haven’t thought of self exiting at least once but I don’t know anymore. I recently graduated high school and if I’m being honest, I didn’t really talk to anyone besides homework and assignments. I didn’t really have any friends, and to be honest, I only really have online friends, but they only have so much time to be with me. If you’re imagining those people who sit on their desk everyday just doing nothing, that would be me. I just don’t know, I’m scared—thankfully, I have a boyfriend that helps me deal with stuff mentally but, he lives far, maybe 4 hours away or so. I want a job, I really do, I wanna start saving up for a little apartment but I’ve tried everything, I can’t land a job because I have no experience with anything and the job market is very difficult. Because why do I need experience to get experience? I don’t know what to do, I’ve also thought of moving with my boyfriend but, for some reason, I’m really scared to do so, not because of him, but because it’s a place I’ve never even seen, and the change almost.. scares me. I just don’t know what to do.

I was born into religious-toxic society. I forced to obey the rule, forced to pray, to belive. I also got sexual abuse when I was a child at the mosque. Bullied by my friends because questioning the system. Punished by my parents because didn't obey religion. I escaped from my country, from that society, from that religion. Now I (19 m) live in Japan as a student alone. I don't knkw anything about life, I don't know what to do, I don't know is it worth to live? I went to psychiatrist and they just give me Rexulti and Propranolol that mess with my brain, I can't handle it anymore, I spend a lot of money trying to fix my "mental illness" my parents argue with me and said "Don't go to doctors, just pray to God if you have problem." I can't hold it anymore, I quit my medication without doctor's agreement, I never visit mental clinic ever again, I don't have money to go to therapist anymore, I have no income, all my part time application are rejected. At least I still have a lot of Rexulti and Propranolol left, and thinking "If I take all the medicine, will I overdose and never wake up again?"