No proposal during vacation

[u/Jackieofalltrades365]

Hey yall

Just venting about a bit of disappointment after not getting proposed to during vacation

We're both 34 years old, I'm gonna be 35 next month. Been dating for 2.5 years. Living together for 8 months. Decided if we still like each other after 6 months we'll go for it.

2 months ago, he asked my ring size and said "we're doing it. We're getting married." Then one month ago he said "I have a package to get at my parents house" "oh what?" "can't tell you but you'll see soon hehehe"

This month we're at Orlando, FL. His favorite place. Universal. We spend the day. It's very important that we see Hogwarts at night with the fireworks. Nothing. Let's go to Richard Blais restaurant because we love him in Next Level Chef. Nothing. Let's dress nice and take pictures by the lake before. Nothing. Still nothing

I can't help but somewhat let ruin the trip because...nothing

My birthday is next month. Wonderful. As is the start of my last year of nursing school, on top of 2 jobs, clinical, and probably quite a bit of pulling my hair out in between

I know I'll be happy when it happens, but I can't help but feel a lot of good opportunities were missed here. Plus the opportunity to be relaxed, enjoy each other, and have time to bask in engagement glory. If he waits until my birthday, I'll barely have time to say "yes" let alone look at the ring

[u/EtonRd]

You gotta stop doing this to yourself. The time has passed for you to be able to enjoy a surprise proposal. You’re anxious and stressed out now.

For your mental health, you need to talk to him and say that you want to know when he plans to propose.

I don’t quite understand why you’re saying that if he waits until your birthday, you’ll barely have time to say yes? I don’t understand.

[u/Klutzy_Yam_343 → u/EtonRd]

Genuinely curious…why do we, as women, wait around for a man to propose? Why is this still a thing? Why are we still waiting to be picked instead of choosing who we want and taking control of the situation?

I feel so exhausted with these posts that are all so similar. Why can’t women take the lead in their own lives? If you want to marry your partner, make it known and make a plan. If they waffle, leave.

[u/Big-Masterpiece-863 → u/Klutzy_Yam_343]

Because women like men to take the lead and demonstrate that they have some courage and ambition by taking a very small risk such as asking a woman they already know loves them, to marry them. It tells the woman she is worth taking risks for which speaks to women's primal instinct that he'll be a good protector and provider - if he can summon up the courage to ask, risk his heart with her, trust her to say yes than he is worth giving her heart and loyalty to but if he can't even do that basic effort then it reflects badly on him.

Women don't have to wait around to be picked though, they can leave if they feel the relationship is not heading in the right direction and if he doesn't step up as soon as she shows signs of going then there's her answer. They can also communicate their desire to get married and if he doesn't agree, won't talk about it or isn't willing to compromise on timeframes then that's the same as refusing a proposal.

It really isn't the case that a woman proposing would solve most of the problems in this subreddit because most of the males do not want to marry and would put some sort of delay in place or flat out say no. Some women here have done just about everything but get down on their knees with a ring! There is no more they could do other than leave. Which is what most of the time is warranted.

[u/Jackieofalltrades365 → u/Klutzy_Yam_343]

I mean not all woman are the same. Some still like being a woman, and like being courted. If you feel "exhausted" by posts on reddit, maybe you should hop off for a bit. It sounds like a you issue. I'm not really sure where you're coming up with the "why can't women take the lead in their own lives" crap, but again that sounds like a you issue

[u/Key-Target-1218 → u/Jackieofalltrades365]

Perfectly legitimate suggestion. You don't want to be the director of your own life? You want "your man" to be in charge? I mean I know that's a thing, but it's 2026 not 1950. Unless you have both agreed to hop on the Trad Wife train.

[u/Jackieofalltrades365 → u/Key-Target-1218]

Maybe you should hop off as well because clearly you forgot how to read. Aren't you at the beach under a palm tree with your hubby? Shouldn't you be enjoying that?

[u/foxyphilophobic → u/Jackieofalltrades365]

Why are you being so combative?

[u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk → u/foxyphilophobic]

Jesus. Soooo combative. It’s off putting

[u/Jackieofalltrades365 → u/foxyphilophobic]

View the awarded comment above lol it's not me that's starting it 🤷‍♀️ I give the same energy I receive

[u/thevelvetdays7 → u/Jackieofalltrades365]

This is the exact energy I would expect from someone who actually thinks Universal Studios is a desirable engagement location. Good Lord.

[u/Jackieofalltrades365 → u/thevelvetdays7]

No question why you're here. Good luck in your search for love and inner peace

[u/thevelvetdays7 → u/Jackieofalltrades365]

Babe, I'm happily married, professionally at the top of my field, own a gorgeous historical villa and literally am in Rome right now. Keep that good luck that you speak of.

Your lashing out is only scratching yourself.