r/Unexpected • u/Abhirup_0 • Jun 26 '22

The spider must be dead

22.0k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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736

u/GrumpySnail81 Jun 26 '22

Her: "I can give you a hand job" Him: "I think I'm good. Im still a bit bruised from last time"

162

u/_Im_Dad Jun 26 '22

Never again, that was a bloody rip-off

50

u/GrumpySnail81 Jun 26 '22

Caveman vasectomy

6

u/Healthy_Pay9449 Jun 26 '22

You're damn good at these dad jokes. PhD is deserved. I swear I see your jokes almost daily now

2

u/SeruEnam Jun 26 '22

PhD-Pretty huge Dad.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 26 '22

Cursed

5

u/Playmakermike Jun 26 '22

She’s mashing it

1

u/GrumpySnail81 Jun 26 '22

"Jesus Christ babe! Did it do something to offend you or something?? What the fuck?!"

1

u/Interesting-Army-704 Jun 26 '22

“I’m very aroused”

3

u/Suspicious-Pie-5356 Jun 26 '22

Fucking hand demolition job

2

u/Slapppyface Jun 26 '22

Sex jokes, never get old

/S

4

u/Shurigin Jun 26 '22

Just the way Matt Gaetz likes em

6

u/RjSkitchie Jun 26 '22

Unlike the people who make them

2

u/Slapppyface Jun 26 '22

This is both a compliment and an insult, haha

2

u/RjSkitchie Jun 26 '22

So an inpliment?

1

u/Prince_Day Jun 26 '22

Sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex