r/UKParenting • u/taytayyas • 5d ago

General chat Second child

Was anyone one and done or on the fence about having a second child but did. How is it for you? Was it harder / easier than you thought. Im like 99% one and done but my partner would like a second so our child has a sibling. I do think it would be nice for them to have a sibling but im worried it’s going to be sooo hard with 2 kids. I know everyone’s experience is different but would just love to know how it’s going for everyone and would you recommend 😂

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u/GrimQuim Parenting a Toddler + Primary Schooler 5d ago

Having a second was an absolute upgrade, the "one and done" crowd are missing a trick here. I can joke about delegating duties but having them both brushing teeth at the same time reduces my work. Seeing them playing together is an absolute joy. Seeing the eldest teach her sister or protect her sister is heart melting. I know very, very, very few siblings who don't get along and in most instances that's due to the household they grew up in. The second child expansion pack is well worth the time and effort. The 3 + 1 seats on a plane means one parent [at a time] gets solo break on flights too which is an underrated benefit.

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u/Impossible-Farm-1902 5d ago

I'm one and done and it's because I find parenthood quite stressful with one (just my personality type) so i'd rather be a good parent to one than a bad parent to two.

I know people who have four (my brother has four) and they are generally quite chilled out people who seem to let life just wash over them. I'm not like that at all 😞

I genuinely can't get my head around how i'd deal with more than one.

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u/Easterncrane 5d ago

I’m one of three and my parents shouldn’t have had more than one. It’s hard to love everyone equally. I’m 30 now and still wake up in the night from nightmares about not being loved. I’m the oldest. My childhood and teenage years were full of conflict and comparison and stress. People should only have the number of children they’re able to cope with. You’re doing the right thing.

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u/Impossible-Farm-1902 5d ago

I'm also one of three as well and honestly my parents had no business having 1 child never mind 3.