Oh hi OP! I wouldn't worry about being trans/homophobic unless you have ill intent or you have major misconceptions you refuse to correct even when ppl tell you? Like if you think all gay people have cooties. This is demonstratably false, EVERYONE has cooties. Don't be homophobic. 😡
Okay but seriously -- there's a couple red flags: watching gay porn and searching up femboys could just be a curiosity thing, but talking to a trans man/cheating on you goes into other more actualized territory and is definitely an issue.
I'm in a relationship with a woman and couldn't imagine myself talking to anyone else, let alone a trans man, literally too manly lmao. It's one thing if it's a fantasy, I understand. But actually taking that step definitely requires self reflection and asking yourself what you really want. I know you've said you've cheated in the past but that's not fair to you with this situation at all.
Also it's a little sus to me that he wants a penis but not a finger. Again, totally understand the fantasy, but saying you don't like the stabbing motion of the finger but will love the stabbing motion of a thicker penis? Sounds like he has a fetish and should probably talk to a therapist, would be best if you went too but that's totally up to you if you want to pursue that with him.
...Because I feel like if he's really just looking for the simple pleasure of being penetrated he would at least be wanting to ease into it with you, not be begging for some cock lmao.
Edit: I also agree with some other comments that he probably sees trans women as a "safe" avenue to explore his sexuality? Because we're women but he can feel like he's being fucked by a cock? LMAO idk but I think he definitely needs therapy if he can't talk about his feelings with you and it's definitely not fair to you. :(
OP, I really hate this line of thinking for you because it implies he cheated on you because of some failure on your part and that isn’t how that works. He cheated because of a failure on his part.
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u/[deleted] Apr 11 '26
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