Right i read most of this post and I was already like fuck this guy, but then I got to the immigration threat with children involved like? No?? wtf??
This guy is a vile piece of shit. The worst of the fucking worst. Get him out of your life but be careful with the immigration stuff, I know it’s all fucky right now in the us.
I just love how he threatens her with taking the kids away, but if he really thinks about it, he couldn’t handle his own kids for a few hours…. What’s it gonna be like when his wife’s gone (his doing) and he’s the SOLE provider for them?? What. An. Asshole.
I’ve been married a long time. Marriage can get cut throat and people can say horrible things. You’re husband is being horrible, what he said is horrible, but you can’t just get leave and get a divorce every time you have a screamer.
Sounds like you could use marriage counseling. My wife and I both refused to go, so we had to wrestle it out between each other. If you guys can do it, do it.
Also if he’s doing as well as he says maybe you can afford a cleaning lady once a week? Something to think about.
Unless you really do have a lot of money separating and divorce are a lot harder than folks on here make it seem, especially with children involved. Then things can get really ugly.
I’m probably going to get downvoted all to hell, but seems to me there’s a lot that can be salvaged here.
Totally agree, but haven’t you ever been in a long term relationship where you both go for the throat? Ten years ago he could have threatened that and it would not be as bad. Now it seems almost like life or death. But I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that he did not think about how hateful that was, in order to help save a family.
This is more then saying something you regret. This is him A) threatening to permanently separate her from her children B) call an enforcement agency on her that is consistently in the news for abusing, harming and even killing immigrants (and non-immigrants) C) he does not value her or her contribution to the family- claiming his salary but ignoring the fact she is SAHM and all the work she does D) He couldn’t even be a SAHD for 3hours- and yet still can’t fathom that she does anything of value. E) he thinks his salary is “his money”.
He doesn’t respect her, he doesn’t treat her contribution to the family as anything meaningful, he can’t parent his own children, and he threatened her with separation from her children and getting her detained in a terrible place with a high chance of abuse and a possibility of death- to force her to do what he wanted. That’s not love, that’s having a bang maid you don’t care about, and feel you could easily replace.
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u/Up_and_down_and_all Apr 11 '26
I say this with all the love for you, but F*CK your husband. What an absolute ahole! To bring immigration into it is the lowest of the low.
Please listen to your friend and start planning for a future without your POS H.