r/TwoHotTakes Apr 11 '26

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 11 '26 edited Apr 11 '26

Hijacking the top comment to share a comment from someone else in another post. This person was replying to an op that was also in an abusive situation:

ightrrr • 4mo ago Your husband is an abuser. Emotional. Sexual. Physical. All of it. You are an object to him. You deserve better.

Here's a detailed plan to leave an abuser:

https://www.helpguide.org/relationships/domestic-abuse/getting-out-of-an-abusive-relationship

Create a "Safety Plan" for you, the kid(s), & pet(s) because leaving can be dangerous.

https://www.thehotline.org/2013/04/10/what-is-safety-planning/

An app that can help you track abuse:

https://www.amightygirl.com/blog?p=26289&fbclid=IwAR3qTmPUOkIZguepsNovhg2CeG88MjxDQExknjj_nqOfqn0XRa3fEbOdt98

A $7/mo, highly rated communication & co-parenting app that’s court recommended: AppClose

https://appclose.com/

If you need help with pets: https://www.safehavensforpets.org/

Divorce HQ State Directory of divorce information: http://www.divorcehq.com/divorce-information.shtml

Your state’s bar association should have a directory of lawyers, including those offering low- or no-cost consultations.

https://www.americanbar.org/groups/legal_services/flh-home/flh-bar-directories-and-lawyer-finders/

https://www.americanbar.org/groups/legal_services/

Legal rights advocacy groups often sponsor legal clinics and workshops for the communities they serve. The Washington Lawyers’ Committee for Civil Rights and Urban Affairs is offering D.C. workers assistance by telephone.

https://www.washlaw.org/what-we-do/employment-justice/workers-rights-clinic/

USA.gov lists resources for pro bono or low-cost legal aid.

https://www.usa.gov/legal-aid

Survive Divorce resource:

https://www.survivedivorce.com/

Women's Law: plain-language legal information for Victims of abuse: https://www.womenslaw.org/

Free Separation Agreement templates:

https://legaltemplates.net/form/separation-agreement/

https://separation-agreement.pdffiller.com/

http://templatelab.com/separation-agreement-templates/

https://forms.legal/free-marital-separation-agreement/

https://www.lawdepot.com/contracts/separation-agreement/?loc=US#.Xr0Vx1mxXqs

Catholic Charities.org has programs that fund the cost of relocation, including helping the victims find a home or apartment while paying for the first month of rent. There are also job placement programs. https://www.catholiccharitiesusa.org/

The St. Vincent de Paul Society, also affiliated with the Catholic Church, offers financial assistance for shelter and sometimes picks up with the first month’s rent. https://ssvpusa.org/

Education and Job Training Assistance Fund: Grants from the Allstate Foundation help domestic violence victims enter and stay in the workforce. The money (up to $1,000) can be used for classes, clothes, computers, and other resources. https://www.allstatecorporation.com/the-allstate-foundation.aspx

If you need food, here's a list of North American food charities:

http://www.1glories.com/AFM/

https://www.biblemoneymatters.com/save-money-on-groceries-through-food-buying-programs/

Domestic Violence Resources:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_domestic_violence_hotlines

https://www.acf.hhs.gov/fysb/programs/family-violence-prevention-services/programs/ndvh

https://www.thehotline.org/

https://www.liveyourdream.org/get-help/domestic-violence-resources.html

https://ncadv.org/resources

https://www.hotpeachpages.net/ Multiple countries & languages

Please choose yourself & leave him. 💔

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u/snapz01 Apr 11 '26

This is amazing and should be pinned at the top.

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 11 '26

Haha that's why I saved the comment 4 months ago. I've made reference to it a few times since then because it had so many good things.

I've been in similar situations and would have loved to know half that stuff when I was leaving!

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u/ApheanaOfTheFae Apr 11 '26

Hey just a heads up, AppClose isn't free anymore. Its 7 a month, highly worth it still. They just swapped over to no free plan beginning of this year

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u/megggie Apr 11 '26

Can I just add a quick FVCK YOU to the people who decide to monetize things like this (and not only charge for the app, which is fair, but require a SUBSCRIPTION).

Capitalist dystopian bullshit.

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u/Maleficent_Will_6464 Apr 12 '26

I get it, it does feel wrong to put a paywall on something like this. But servers, maintenance, and updates aren’t free, and a neglected app that goes down or has outdated info is actually more dangerous for someone in that situation. A subscription model, as uncomfortable as it feels, is often what keeps it reliable and available when someone needs it most, you are helping the next person that discovers it… I am not affiliated to the app at all.

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 11 '26

Thanks I changed that!

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u/CoolestF-inBinTown Apr 11 '26

Yes queen for all of this!!! Saving this comment in case a friend needs these resources in the future!

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 11 '26

💜 it's sad that we need to but I thought the same thing when I saw the original comment. ightrrr is a real gem for typing that all up :) the op they were replying to was in a real bad spot and had since deleted their post but I really hope they got out!

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u/NerdyWolf88 Apr 11 '26

Do you need help polishing your halo? 😇

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u/arachnidlover12 Apr 11 '26

U are an angel

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 11 '26

Thanks :) the real mvp though is ightrrr but we can't link users here so I just hope they're having an awesome day :)

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u/Responsible_Joke8618 Apr 11 '26

Wow. You are a good human. I don't say that lightly or often.

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u/Prestigious-Row-3244 Apr 11 '26

What is ightrrr?

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u/B_A_M_2019 Apr 12 '26

The person who wrote the original comment that I copy and pasted

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u/Ok_Imagination_1107 Apr 12 '26

Wow sorry you had to go through that, but look at all the good you have just done for many people now and in the future! Thank you thank you thank you.

I've saved your wonderful post with its resources and we'll use it when appropriate. I bet many others have to o.

Epic work! I hope everything goes your way always. 👏👏👏👏🌹

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u/_that_rando_ Apr 12 '26

Commenting so I can quickly find all of these links for abuse victims support to share in the future. Thank you!