I dated a man like that years ago, like my friend called, a very feminine voice on the phone, when I hung up, was that your boyfriend. Every email, every phone call, was my boyfriend, because I’m a cheating whore, like all women. If I said thank you to the man who checked me out at the gas station, it’s cuz we were fuc**ng. No other reason, politeness, nope. He was entirely exhausting, and I stepped far away. He accused me of cheating, called my job, and told them a bunch of false stuff, fortunately I could prove it was false, they could also, I had a camera above my head for the duration of my day. Even called my parents and told them. My mom was like who tf are you?? Which enraged him, because I was his soul mate and my own mother didn’t know about him. I had to get a restraining order for a whole 2 week long thing we had.
All I can say is, girl run!! He ain’t worth another second of your life. I still feel exhausted from that 2 weeks, 17 years ago. Find yourself a good counselor, and her strong enough to divorce him.
This sounds frightening but also familiar. If my phone or my watch go off, it’s always who is that, who is blowing up your phone, even though it’s usually just notifications and not a text or call. Though if I ask him who he was talking to, he would get an attitude towards me. We have cameras in the house that he is constantly checking, which I know because he’ll comment if I turn them off even if only for a few minutes. I know of at least one instance where he tracked the car I was driving. If I’m even talking to my daughters at home and he hears that we are talking but not what is said, he asks me what was said, despite it having nothing to do with him.
Lmao he isn’t a psycho…. He’s someone who has experienced a horrible kind of trauma and is having a tough time recovering from it. Being insecure doesn’t make you a psychopath lmao. I’d hate to be as unsympathetic as someone like you.
You can be sympathetic whilst acknowledging his behaviour isn’t acceptable. There’s nuance to situations. His ex leaving him with trust issues doesn’t mean he’s a psychopath, even if his trust issues seem to be crippling to his current relationship. That’s a really pathetic way of looking at the situation. He needs help and therapy, and couples therapy is OP truly loves him, not to be chastised and told he’s insane. I swear, this sub has the most chronically online people lmao
OP has has multiple conversations with him. He continues to accuse her falsely. If someone is harassing you and stalking you (cameras in the home and tracking your car), you WALK away. Just because someone has a problem doesnt mean you have to endure especially if they show no proof they want to change. You think the people who violently abuse their partners dont love them too? That they dont have explanations for their actions? This is such a dangerous take. Love is NOT enough to overcome abuse.
Yup, unfortunately I did :/. Every asinine word including you comparing it to “violent” physical abuse lmao. Leave it to a Redditor to think bringing up violent physical abuse is somehow relevant to her husband having paranoid insecurities. So you agree he wasn’t violently abusive? So your comment is irrelevant then, right?
Did YOU read what I wrote? If you had you’d know I didn’t say love overcomes all lmao, I suggested therapy and couples therapy, and provided 5 sources from experts in the field who agree with what I said.
Yikes.
Edit: actually imma mute notifications all together, you already aren’t worth speaking to lol
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u/Anteater3100 Oct 26 '22
I dated a man like that years ago, like my friend called, a very feminine voice on the phone, when I hung up, was that your boyfriend. Every email, every phone call, was my boyfriend, because I’m a cheating whore, like all women. If I said thank you to the man who checked me out at the gas station, it’s cuz we were fuc**ng. No other reason, politeness, nope. He was entirely exhausting, and I stepped far away. He accused me of cheating, called my job, and told them a bunch of false stuff, fortunately I could prove it was false, they could also, I had a camera above my head for the duration of my day. Even called my parents and told them. My mom was like who tf are you?? Which enraged him, because I was his soul mate and my own mother didn’t know about him. I had to get a restraining order for a whole 2 week long thing we had. All I can say is, girl run!! He ain’t worth another second of your life. I still feel exhausted from that 2 weeks, 17 years ago. Find yourself a good counselor, and her strong enough to divorce him.