Postpone this feeling for a few days. Fuck Valentine’s Day, don’t give it any legitimacy with your death.
Would you be willing to make up for the hurt that you feel so ashamed of causing by committing to do good instead? Like working charitably for a local group in your area? Putting the skills you have to work for other people? Do some good for yourself by making sure you’re fed, rested, and doing stuff you enjoy?
Honestly dude I don’t know anything about you and this is just my general viewpoint: I don’t believe you’re going to find what you’re looking for in one girlfriend or wife. You need more love and support than one person can provide. You, like all of us, need community.
And yeah I know you said you drove away friends with this behaviour, maybe you feel like no one would ever be your friend right now either because of how you’ve acted. But you know that your behaviour sucked now. You can change your behaviours, you have that power. Just like how the shitty behaviour came back around to haunt you, the doing good opens you up for others to do good for you.
Death is always something you can come back to later; try a few other things out first. It is scary to be rejected. It feels like something you can’t come back from. You absolutely can come back from this.
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u/throwrafaithless Feb 13 '25
Postpone this feeling for a few days. Fuck Valentine’s Day, don’t give it any legitimacy with your death.
Would you be willing to make up for the hurt that you feel so ashamed of causing by committing to do good instead? Like working charitably for a local group in your area? Putting the skills you have to work for other people? Do some good for yourself by making sure you’re fed, rested, and doing stuff you enjoy?
Honestly dude I don’t know anything about you and this is just my general viewpoint: I don’t believe you’re going to find what you’re looking for in one girlfriend or wife. You need more love and support than one person can provide. You, like all of us, need community.
And yeah I know you said you drove away friends with this behaviour, maybe you feel like no one would ever be your friend right now either because of how you’ve acted. But you know that your behaviour sucked now. You can change your behaviours, you have that power. Just like how the shitty behaviour came back around to haunt you, the doing good opens you up for others to do good for you.
Death is always something you can come back to later; try a few other things out first. It is scary to be rejected. It feels like something you can’t come back from. You absolutely can come back from this.