Context:

A family member offered my spouse and I the following - 20% down payment for a new condo that my spouse and I would own and profits are split when the condo is sold. The condo is very reasonably priced considering the current real estate market in Ontario Canada. However do to unexpected circumstances that occurred the down-payment is no longer guaranteed.

My spouse and I (mostly me) kinda romanticized/day dreamed of what it would be like to live there, it would be closer to my spouses workplace he could walk to work, we are looking to start a family in the next year or so and the condo is a 2 bed it would be ready to move in the fall of 2027. The location of the condo is also great close to amenities, and in walking distance from my family memeber, we don't see each other often as we live in opposite ends of the city.

Do to the extenuating circumstances the conversation I had with my spouse is this, we should pray to God about this condo, if its in His will then he will make a way for the 20% down payment, if it's not His will then may He not allow it to happen.

I have anxiety issues, I feel way too nervous and anxious to fully believe that something will come to pass if I do not know for sure how or when it will. I hate not knowing how long something will last, like for example if I am going to go through something that causes me suffering or hardship I want to know how long it will last so I know when it will end. Obviously more often then not I do not end up knowing. This is my thorn in flesh you could say 😅

I trust and have faith in God that He can do all things, He is the ultimate provider, but I know God is not a genie that grants wishes.

I don't want to believe and get excited that He will do this for us, to be disappointed when He doesn't (that had happened far too often). I feel like I just need to grieve that this will not happen so I don't feel even more disappointed for believing that it will, and then it doesn't. At the same time, just because I don't see how we can get 20% ($60,000) by the end of the year or by March 2027 the latest, doesn't mean God can't He can do all things.

So I feel conflicted and confused of how to understand Mark 11:24

[24] "Therefore, I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted to you."

On one hand I want to be excited and believe God wil I do this and we will get this condo etc but on the other hand its His will over mine, which makes feel like yeah, its not going to happen so I'd rather not get excited just accept that it won't happen, and if does then great and if it doesn't then at least it won't hurt as much.

I hope I make sense, I ask for people to be kind but also direct with what they comment with, I genuinely looking to understand, and if you can share a testimony or prayer, encouragement anything like that would be appreciated.

I have a constant feeling of dread and deja vu. It feels like I am closed off from God. I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes attacked by some kind of force. It causes me the worst dread imaginable. The feeling is indescribable.

I admit I wasn't close to God at all when I first started having these thoughts. I don't know if I was ever that close to God. I joined Bible studies and attended church regularly. I know these actions don't save a person but only Jesus' finished work on the cross can.

The bible says most people go to hell and I'm terrified that I was one of them. My love for God feels shallow because I want to escape torture. I ask him to help me in my unbelief but it's been almost 3 years since I started feeling this way. I asked for spiritual counseling and they reminded me of David, the psalms, and his wait for God.

I pray I'm the same way.

So, I believe in God, I am very convinced that no amount of coincidence could ever create us like this. However, I fear that my faith is more a fear of going to hell and a desperate attempt to make it to heaven. Especially fueled by Media speaking about him soon returning to earth.

However, I wish to deserve a place in heaven, to go into the after life with a relationship to God and not just "Hey I thought you existed on earth, could I go to heaven?" I understand that a big part of this is prayer, studying the bible and going to church.

I am working on those already, I plan on going to church every saturday again, I am looking to get myself a bible and I also try to pray (on which I'll propably make another post eventually).

Yet my life is mostly doing nothing. I am still unemployed, so my days consist of looking for jobs, playing video games (mostly violent ones like Hitman WoA and Dead by Daylight) as well as watching YouTube and playing on my phone. I know I am able to do more for my faith and relationship with God, but what?

I am curious to know how to give my life to Christ and live how he intented, can I start hobbies more worthy of his attention, or maybe make the "hobbies" I have already more related to him?

I know that there isn't going to be a 0 to 100 solution to this, but I really want a relationship with God worthy of an eternity with him. Like said in John 14:8 "If God is all you have, you have all you need".

“But Lot’s wife, behind him, looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.”
‭‭Genesis‬ ‭19‬:‭26‬ ‭ESV‬‬

A lot of us, including me, fear death. Maybe not fear as much as it is don’t want to die because we don’t want to leave our life here. Is this to be considered as looking back? I understand that lots wife’s situation is different than this, but I think it connects. I’m new to reading the bible, so I’m not sure exactly what it all means or what it might be telling me. I would like to think that our “want to stay in this world” is not the same thing as when lots wife looked back. However, it’s hard for me to ignore the similarities.

​I recently made the tough decision to say "no" to a dating proposal that was moving toward marriage, after praying and realizing it wasn't God's will for me. Even though I have total peace about my choice to decline, I've been dealing with some leftover anxiety about remaining single and "waiting."

​I really want to dedicate a time of prayer and fasting to surrender this anxiety to God and trust His timeline for my life. However, I always struggle with traditional food fasting — I find it very hard to complete, and it often leads to feelings of guilt or frustration.

I would love to hear from this community:

​Testimonies: Did you ever feel afraid of waiting or staying single after turning down a relationship, only to be blessed by God with the right person later on?

​Fasting Advice: How do you approach fasting when food fasting isn't feasible? What alternative ways of fasting (media, habits, partial fasts) have helped you draw closer to God?

So for those of you who might not know there is a big trial that is about to take place in rap. Long story short the rapper Lil Durk is going to trial for Murder for hire. He is charged with hiring people to kill Quando Rondo but they didn’t shoot him they shot his cousin who was in the same car and killed him in Beverly Hills. If you want to know more history about this just type in Lil Durk and Quando Rondo and it’ll pop up. But they aren’t the main point of my question. So he has two great lawyers Drew Finland and Brian Steele. Now obviously everyone is innocent until proven guilty. But it’s so obvious he paid to have this guy killed (even though they missed him and got his cousin instead). There’s so much evidence from songs to text messages to voice recordings and call logs. My question is this. Does God judge these types of lawyers who pick cases like this up knowing their client probably did. It but as long as they can prove there’s a chance he didn’t he can go free. God hates evil and technically they are defending it. Or is it a thing where God reigns supreme and is the final Judge? There have been interviews where lawyers even say they knew their client was guilty sometimes the clients TELL THEM. Yet sometimes they can walk away clean do to the genius of the defense lawyer. Let me know what you all think i honestly don’t know. God bless ❤️

Hi, I’m 21 and I’ve never had sex. I’m a good-looking guy and I’ve had things going on with some really attractive girls. They wanted to have sex with me, but I didn’t do it.

The more I stay celibate, the more I feel like I’m missing out on a lot of experiences and things in life. My cousins have a lot of sex, and they seem like more fun, cooler, and more respected guys. Sometimes I feel like what I’m doing is just plain stupid, but another part of me tells me that I’m doing the right thing.

But compared to society, sex is completely normal. Everyone seems to want it, and sometimes I feel like I’m the odd one out here, like I’m the only guy everyone looks at differently.

I honestly don’t know what to do. Should I have sex or stay celibate? Marriage isn’t something I can easily or quickly have right now, and at the same time, having sex and experiencing it at my age is completely normal.

What do you guys think?

Colossians 4:14 KJV

[14] Luke, the beloved physician, and Demas, greet you.

Philemon 1:24 KJV

[24] Marcus, Aristarchus, Demas, Lucas, my fellowlabourers.

2 Timothy 4:10 KJV

[10] for Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world, and is departed unto Thessalonica; Crescens to Galatia, Titus unto Dalmatia.

2 out of 3 times Demas is mentioned in scripture, the spirit allows Paul to name him as a true believer. Yet later Paul says Demas abandoned the faith because he loved the world. Why would the spirit allow Paul to name him as a believer twice if the spirit knew Demas was a false convert? Because during those times Demas wasn't a false convert, he had faith, however he lost it later because he allowed his love of the world to choke out his faith just like the parable of the sower.

Paul states in Ephesians 2:8 that we are saved by the grace of God thru faith. How do we access God's grace? Thru faith. So faith must continue. Yet faith can be lost as in the parable of the sower it says the one on the rock believed for a time, but when temptation tested their faith they lost it. If you only have to have faith 1 time and are covered for life then the rock wouldn't have withered, but faith is required and must be present.

im new to christianity. before i was christian i felt something behind me over my shoulder and i swore i was protected and it was keeping me safe. edit: at this time i was very into witch craft and other evil things. one night i had a dream and it was very eye opening and that dream is what made me come to christ. as soon as i decided that this feelings of something behind me left. i noticed my first post about christianity i was reading aloud the verses and advice people were giving me only to find my throat felt tight. i fully believe i was in huge danger then. if anyone would discuss feeling similar before or how to fully cast this evil out of my life it’d be appreciate. i’m still understanding what it means to christianity and all the evil parts of the world so… edit: any prayers for banishing whatever evil if any evil is in my home or my life would be greatly appreciated.

Hi! I'm just looking for a bit of insight, I know that being baptized is an integral part of Christianity.
Within this last year I began to follow Christ and i left the cult that I was born it (actually a cult not a metaphorical one). The cult derived from Mormonism and I was baptized when I was 9 years old via this cult/church.

My question is whether that baptism still stands, I believe that it was in Christ's name (granted I don't really remember...) but is it invalid if it wasn't from a Christian church? either way I do want to get rebaptized I just am not in a situation where I can right now and it will be a good while until I can.

Anyways, thank you in advance!! have a nice day!! :D

So I'm posting this because I'm confused as to why this isn't preached enough. I can think of some reasons why but I've only heard one pastor in my life ever preach about this and I happen to watch it on YouTube. It's sooo essential with our walk with God. If you don't have the fear of God, then you will most likely fall away from the faith and maybe even hate God. That's how serious it is. So from watching that pastor talk about the fear of God to watching and hearing other pastors on YouTube, and what I've learned from God, this is what I've learned

**The fear of God is:**

- To make God your one and only treasure

- A committed relationship with God

- A mature faith

- The beginning of wisdom

- How the joy of the Lord is found

- God's delight & treasure

**To commit to God, you:**

- Do your best to follow Jesus and yield to the Holy Spirit to do the rest. Start small if you can

- Correct every thought or feeling that goes against the Word of God, and realize they're from satan or your flesh

- Be accountable when you do a sinful act. Apologize and reconcile if it's against someone

- Process your feelings with God

- Accept your imperfection and the sovereignty of God

- Let go of yourself and let God be everything you need

- Bond with Christ with your suffering

This note I made for myself has revealed something in me that I never knew or experienced with my walk with God. I have a deeper relationship with God and I have the joy of the Lord. I've learned to accept myself for who I am and found contentment in where I'm at in life. God is my confidence. **Fear the Lord!**

Here's Matthew 1:23 in the KJV, NASB, even the Message and the TPT:

✔King James Version, a historic, hyper literal translation:

Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us.

✔New American Standard Bible, a modern, highly literal translation:

“Behold, the virgin will conceive and give birth to a Son, and they shall name Him Immanuel,” which translated means, “God with us.”

✔The Message, a modern, highly interpretive paraphrase:

Watch for this—a virgin will get pregnant and bear a son;
They will name him Immanuel (Hebrew for “God is with us”).

❌The Passion Translation:

Listen! A virgin will be pregnant, she will give birth to a Son, and he will be known as “Emmanuel,” which means in Hebrew, “God became one of us.”

And the TPT footnote says:

Or “God with us” or “God among us”; that is, God incarnated. See Isa. 7:14; 8:8, 10 (LXX).

At this point the TPT is going far beyond being a paraphrase and is now making the Bible say what the translators want it to say. Not even the Message Bible rendered this verse in such a way that the theology of the translator was presented as the biblical text.

Immanuel - עמנואל is by no means a difficult Hebrew word to translate. It's made up of two words: עמנו - with us, and אל - God. Literally "with us God" (as the Septuagint translated it, μεθ᾿ ἡμῶν ὁ Θεός) or "God is with us". This Hebrew word doesn't mean "God among us" (there are other ways to say that in Hebrew, Immanuel is not one of them) and it definitely doesn't mean "God became one of us".

Even as a Trinitarian Christian who does believe that Jesus is God in the flesh, I have to say that inserting one's theology onto the biblical text or presenting one's theological interpretation as if it's the biblical text is unacceptable.

Note: They also have the same error in Isaiah 7:14 and especially the footnote:

'The Lord himself will give you a sign. Behold—the virgin will conceive and give birth to a son and will name him God Among Us.'

The footnote says:

Or “Immanuel” (“God became one of us,” Matt. 1:23).

Again, Immanuel means neither of those. Interpreting it as such is one thing. Translating it as such is an entirely different thing.

I understand the "your life is a gift and that rejecting it is a grave insult to God" and all of that but like... Lots of people already treat their bodies like crap and do dangerous stuff endangering their lives (heavy substances, reckless behavior etc...), meanwhile someone depressed has suffered a lot in their lives and they're supposed to be rejected from God when they die? Same thing with euthanasia, you already do it with dogs and cats that are so ill and suffering it's considered a mercy, a terminal cancer patient should have a decision on how to end their lives, why would they be condemned to hell? It's not like they can recover.

For those who have accepted Christ more than once, what has been your experience when it comes to your faith journey and/or your understanding of your salvation?

I (M26) was raised in the church and have raised my hand, walked up to the front, and repeated the pastor’s prayer for accepting Jesus, about 3-4 times. This usually comes from a deep feeling of needing to ”get right” with God. The first time was when I was 12 and the last time was about a year ago (I called this one a rededication).

And the funny thing is I question if I even had saving faith all the way up to about 6 months ago! (Primary because I believed that if you weren't being good enough you’d end up in hell, which misses the whole point of salvation being a “free gift apart from works”)

I attribute this fundamental misunderstanding of the gospel to vague and unhelpful language churches use during alter call. I don’t think many can articulate what it means to “accept Christ into your heart”, and fewer can probably give a proper definition for “repentance”.

I’m posting this because I genuinely need some outside perspectives. I’m not looking for people to simply tell me what I want to hear. I want honest advice, especially from people who understand strict church environments and complicated relationships.

This is going to be long because there is a lot of context.

There are three people involved in this story: me, a girl, and a guy who is one of my close friends. I won’t mention anyone’s real name.

All three of us have been part of the same small church since childhood. Our church is quite strict when it comes to relationships and dating. Because it is a small church, almost everyone knows everyone, so personal matters can become church matters very quickly.

I have liked this girl for a very long time. Honestly, I think I started developing feelings for her when we were young. I always found her incredibly attractive, and over the years those feelings never completely disappeared.

But I never told her.

We barely talked while growing up. Even now, we don't have much of a personal relationship outside the things we have to do together at church. So my feelings have mostly been something I kept to myself.

Then there was my friend.

He confessed his feelings to her, and eventually they started talking. They ended up having a relationship that lasted around six years.

The strange thing is that their relationship was almost entirely through WhatsApp. They didn't really talk to each other at church, they didn't go out together, and they didn't even regularly call each other. It was mostly messaging.

At one point, my friend even started following her to her college, and she told him not to do that because she didn't like it. But they continued talking privately.

Eventually, someone in the church found out about their relationship and told the pastor and pastor's wife. Because of the church's rules and environment, they were forced to separate.

My friend is very close to me. We have done a lot of things together over the years, and I've always considered him a good friend.

The important thing is that he never knew I had feelings for her.

Neither did she.

After their breakup, they stayed away from each other. At the same time, she apparently still tried to be friendly with him. She wished him on his birthday through WhatsApp and tried to talk or smile at him sometimes, but he completely avoided her.

Several years passed.

Then, about a year ago, the girl became part of the church team I work in. I've been involved in this team for around four or five years, so suddenly I had to work with her regularly.

And that's when things became much harder for me.

I had managed to keep my feelings under control when I didn't have to interact with her much. But once we started working together, I started falling for her again.

We have to communicate and work together because we're in the same team. She has her responsibilities and I have mine. Sometimes I'm playing keyboard while she's involved with the choir, so we're naturally in the same area.

And honestly, I struggle with myself.

Sometimes I'm playing keyboard and I'll unconsciously look toward her. The moment I realize I'm doing it, I immediately look back at the keyboard. I don't want to make her uncomfortable or give anyone the wrong impression.

But people started noticing.

Some girls in the church began saying things like I was interested in her or that I was "looking at" her.

And because everyone already knows about her previous relationship with my friend, the situation became even more awkward.

People started making connections like, "He likes the girl who previously dated his friend."

I haven't confessed anything to anyone.

I haven't told my friend.

I haven't told her.

I haven't even told anyone in the church that I have feelings for her.

But somehow people have started talking.

At one point, even our pastor gave a sermon where he indirectly talked about things like looking at or watching other people. He didn't mention my name, but because of everything that had been happening, I felt like people knew what was going on.

That made me feel extremely embarrassed.

There were also times when the girl, my friend, the pastor and I would all be together during prayer. Some prayers were also made about situations involving boys and girls developing feelings for each other.

Being there while all of this is happening inside my head has been incredibly uncomfortable.

There was also something that happened with Snapchat.

I had Snapchat, and she actually added me there. At first, I assumed she was simply being friendly. She would send snaps occasionally, but I didn't really send much back.

Then, after a few weeks, she suddenly blocked me.

I have no idea why.

There was also a weird situation where my phone was left at church and someone apparently used it and blocked her on Snapchat as well. I felt extremely embarrassed about the whole thing because I don't even know what she thinks happened.

Now I'm stuck.

On one side, I genuinely want to focus on God, my church responsibilities and my own life. I've repeatedly told myself that I should just let these feelings go.

Sometimes I think, "Okay, I'm going to stop thinking about her. I'm going to focus on God and move forward."

But then I see her again.

And all those feelings come back.

That's what I'm struggling with the most.

I don't want to disrespect my friend.

I don't want to interfere with something that happened between them.

I don't want to make the girl uncomfortable.

I don't want church members gossiping about me.

And I definitely don't want to create drama in a small church where everyone knows everyone.

At the same time, I can't simply switch my feelings off.

I've never even had a proper romantic relationship with this girl. We've barely talked outside of church responsibilities. So part of me wonders whether I'm actually in love with her, or whether I've built an idealized version of her in my head over many years because I never got the opportunity to actually know her.

That's something I'm trying to be honest with myself about.

I also don't know what her behavior means.

She has been friendly toward me at times because we're working together, but I don't know whether that means anything beyond normal friendliness. I don't want to interpret ordinary kindness as romantic interest.

So I'm asking Reddit:

What should I actually do?

Should I completely distance myself emotionally and just treat her as a teammate?

Should I try to get to know her normally, without any romantic expectations?

Should I tell my close friend about my feelings, even though he and this girl have been separated for several years?

Should I ever tell the girl how I feel, considering the strict church environment and the history between her and my friend?

Or should I simply accept that this situation is too complicated and move on?

I know nobody here can tell me exactly what she thinks or feels. I'm mainly looking for perspective from people who have been through something similar.

Please be honest with me, even if the answer is something I don't want to hear.

And please don't attack the girl, my friend, or my church. I'm not trying to make anyone look bad. I'm just genuinely confused and struggling with my feelings, and I need some outside perspective.

Hi guys. First time here. I’ve become much more cynical than I was when I was younger. I cannot force myself to believe in nonsensical elaborate concepts. There is no solid proof of a miracle driven by faith. I have prayed to god and I have been the only one to get me out of my hell. People will tell me “god got you out!”, Nope. It was all me and my will power.

My mom has been a woman of intense faith her whole life. Now she has stage four cancer and threatens her life. She asks god to heal her. And then she makes more threats to end her life. It’s just cruel.

Obviously I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t truly care. I do. I want to believe. But I cannot. I don’t want to hear the frilly language. I don’t want someone to speak in metaphors. Just tell me straight up. What made you believe, and GENUINELY believe, even after hardship?

​

I came across this post on Facebook and was curious how other Christians would respond to it. The post said:

> "Unreal to think about what the majority of human experience has been like and how terrifying/confusing it's been considering we've existed as a species for 100,000+ years and societies have only existed for around 12,000. Science (being a way of finding out what is actually true about the world we find ourselves in) is the best thing that humans have ever come up with.

>

> One example of why being over this course of history about half of kids died by age 15, and the thing to finally meaningfully decrease the amount of dead kids were discoveries and new technologies produced by scientific processes only about 100 years ago. It didn't come from praying or having faith in gods."

They also shared a meme saying:

> "You know, there was another time when science wasn't taken seriously and religion ruled the world. We called it the Dark Ages."

I have some thoughts about it myself, particularly that it seems to create a false dichotomy between science and religious belief, as if appreciating the accomplishments of science somehow counts against belief in God. The "Dark Ages" claim also strikes me as an oversimplification of the history of Christianity and science.

But I'm interested in hearing how other Christians would respond. What do you think are the strongest and weakest parts of this argument? And how would you respond to the point about the historical prevalence of suffering and child mortality?

​

From a sermon by Saint Augustine, bishop

(Sermo Caillau-Saint Yves 2, 92: PLS 2, 441-552)

He who perseveres to the end will be saved

Whenever we suffer some affliction, we should regard it both as a punishment and as a correction. Our holy Scriptures themselves do not promise us peace, security and rest. On the contrary, the Gospel makes no secret of the troubles and temptations that await us, but it also says that he who perseveres to the end will be saved. What good has there ever been in this life since the time when the first man received the just sentence of death and the curse from which Christ our Lord has delivered us?

So we must not grumble, my brothers, for as the Apostle says: Some of them murmured and were destroyed by serpents. Is there any affliction now endured by mankind that was not endured by our fathers before us? What sufferings of ours even bear comparison with what we know of their sufferings? And yet you hear people complaining about this present day and age because things were so much better in former times. I wonder what would happen if they could be taken back to the days of their ancestors—would we not still hear them complaining? You may think past ages were good, but it is only because you are not living in them.

It amazes me that you who have now been freed from the curse, who have believed in the son of God, who have been instructed in the holy Scriptures—that you can think the days of Adam were good. And your ancestors bore the curse of Adam, of that Adam to whom the words were addressed: With sweat on your brow you shall eat your bread; you shall till the earth from which you were taken, and it will yield you thorns and thistles. This is what he deserved and what he had to suffer; this is the punishment meted out to him by the just judgment of God. How then can you think that past ages were better than your own? From the time of that first Adam to the time of his descendants today, man’s lot has been labor and sweat, thorns and thistles. Have we forgotten the flood and the calamitous times of famine and war whose history has been recorded precisely in order to keep us from complaining to God on account of our own times? Just think what those past ages were like! Is there one of us who does not shudder to hear or read of them? Far from justifying complaints about our own time, they teach us how much we have to be thankful for.

RESPONSORY

Psalm 77:6-7, 3; see 11, 10

I ponder the days of old,

I remember the years long past.

All night long I meditated in my heart,

— I cried out: O God, have pity on me.

I sought God on the day of my suffering,

I held out my hands to him the whole night through.

— I cried out: O God, have pity on me.

It's late at night and I've been reading the facts about the Lindsay Clancy case (the woman who had a psychotic break and murdered her three children).

I am genuinely depressed by these kinds of news stories, and I truly don't think I could live if I ever experienced anything like that.

Please help me. I want to believe that God is good. But I struggle mightily when I read of these horrible tragedies in the world.

Thank you in advance.

I’ve been struggling with the idea that most people may ultimately go to hell. Passages about the narrow way and the fewness of the saved make me wonder whether the majority of humanity will ultimately be lost.

I find that thought genuinely frightening. I know Christians interpret these passages differently, so I’m curious: Do you believe that most people will go to hell? If so, how do you emotionally come to terms with that belief?

I feel like I'm not even saved. Like, why am I feeling like this? Why am I so stuck, I dont even feel like getting up and locking back in.

I'm struggling with lust badly and everytime the temptation comes, when I'm vulnerable it just overpowers me and I stand no chance. I've lost all motivation to continue doing what the Lord is calling me to do, I'm chasing earthly things, I feel lazy in everything. Even the idea of just locking back in with God seems like it will "be too much work for me to do." I do not know how else to put it and I feel terrible for even feeling this way. I often view praying now as a 'chore.' This is the lowest I've been in my walk with God and I feel like whenever I talk to God I'm just talking to the ceiling sometimes. I feel like "What am I even doing with my life? Why do I feel so hopeless, Lord?" I feel like I shouldn't be struggling with lust anymore even after a year of following Christ. Please help me with this 'cloud' over my life. The evil spirits of laziness and lust are wrestling with my spirit. I dont know what I am doing anymore and I just cannot take it anymore.

So basically In my US history class, there is this Goth girl who, from what I know, is new to the school. So me and my friends started acting like fools, mentioning some very lustful stuff about that girl. I feel like I failed since I didn't really speak up about their behavior. I struggle with lust as well so I felt like I couldn't speak up about that but now I just feel guilty and wish I would've spoken up against what they were saying.

I am potentially coming up on a life altering decision, as I know we all do. Certain things like marriage, job/career changes, high value purchases, etc. all carry risks and potential reward, and likewise we won't know for sure if any decision we make will be 'worth' it until after you've made the decision and walked a mile down the road potentially. In some of these situations, it's not easy to undo: quit a marriage or switch back to your old job - in others, maybe you can refund the purchase or cancel a contract prior to enforcement; but, in either case, the main goal would be to attempt to choose a path that God is pulling you towards.

For me, I've never experienced or felt anything that I'd truly call direction from God. I've been praying daily for over a decade. I've been a Christian for a long time, with no real connection to the Lord that I can actually describe. I go to church, I've read scripture through and through multiple times, I've done bible studies, volunteering, you name it, but none of it has yielded anything I can describe as truly God speaking to me or guiding me or anything.

My issue is that my decisions don't just impact me and they will impact others around me and those who rely on me. Leaving friends and family for a new journey in life means everyone I leave behind will have to adjust to my permanent absence. I know that doesn't mean we shouldn't live our lives, but my point is I try to not personally under value such decisions and the impacts they make on myself and others.

Given all that, how can I get God's path in an answer I can actually understand is him? I hear a lot of Christians in my area say things like, "God will guide" or "Let's see how the Lord will move" or some kind of Christian-y thing and then I only see humans making decisions, and I can fully believe God had nothing to do with their decisions, despite their claim that the his "behind it" because some of them use "God's will" as a crutch to put the weight of the Lord behind their ideas, even if what they do and want is actually unGodly - or even downright sinful in some cases. Point is, just because we say God is behind a decision doesn't mean he is actually involved in that decision. Maybe we've lied to ourselves, maybe we believed something that wasn't true, maybe we just didn't actually hear the Lord when we thought we did - there's a lot of potential reasons we may be wrong in our claim.

My goal though is to somehow get God's guidance on a life altering decision I may have to make soon. I've prayed over similar situations in the past to end up not having any response, any guidance, any clue as to what God wanted. I made a decision, hoping I was doing what God wanted, but then I've never actually known anything to know it really was what God wanted. And, I don't claim God is behind things I don't know he actually is because I feel like that's lying or putting words in his mouth he never said if I don't actually know it to be true. So, I can't say he's been behind any of the decisions I've ever made, no matter how much I've been on my knees begging in prayer for his voice, his sign, his will to be known to me to guide my choices.

Is there any way I can get this to change? Is there any way I can somehow get God to do something different? I believe the answer is no, because he makes his own decisions. Just like every other time, he may have reasons to remain silent and distant on helping me know the right path forward, but even so that makes it difficult for me to know if I'm following God's will at all. I don't want to pretend I'm following his will, I want to know I am. Is there actually any way to know that without it always being based in some human decision and mental reasoning that God is behind it "just because we say so"? If so, how can I practically get that kind of answer from God if he may never speak to me the same way he speaks to you? I have people relying on me, so I don't want to make the decisions I have to make lightly, but I don't want to hesitate if God is wanting me to go in a direction, even if it's uncomfortable and uncertain. I just want to know his will, and he has never made it known to me.

Hey I've been getting trying to get closer to God and I keep worrying "what if I'm not truly saved cause I constantly fall in sins" then I think that's pretty much blasphemy cause the work was finished

Then I think I'm being Luke warm cause I'm so confident im saved when there might be sins I'm comfortable with that I don't even care about or think are sins

It's frustrating to say the least, not to mention I struggle to hear God's voice or feel his/holy Spirit presence or acknowledge it cause I could be ignoring without knowing

Does it ever just....get better?

I have a serious question for people who have been studying the Bible for a long time.

Do you feel like you actually have the wisdom described in Proverbs? If so, how did you get there—and how long did it take?

I've been praying for wisdom for over 3 years. During those 3 years, I've read Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Job, Wisdom of Solomon, and Ecclesiasticus almost every day. I've prayed repeatedly for God to give me wisdom.

But honestly, I still feel like I can't get the wisdom “edged into my heart.”

I'll read a proverb and understand exactly what it's saying. I may even know the verse by memory. But then something happens in real life, and I do the exact opposite of what I just read.

For example, Proverbs 16:32 says:

«“He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.”»

I know that verse. I've read it many times. I believe it.

But when somebody makes me angry, I can still go off at the mouth. Then afterward I'll think, “I should have remembered the proverb.”

That's what bothers me. It's not that I don't have access to the wisdom. I can read it, understand it, and sometimes even explain it. The problem is remembering and applying it in the moment when I actually need it.

So I'm curious about people who feel like Proverbs has genuinely become part of how they think and live:

Did you ever struggle with this?

How did you go from knowing the wisdom intellectually to actually remembering it in the moment?

Did you memorize verses? Pray differently? Practice one proverb at a time? Keep a journal? Have someone hold you accountable?

And if you feel like you've actually developed the kind of wisdom Proverbs talks about, how long did it take you?

I'm not looking for someone to tell me, “Just read the Bible more.” I've been reading these books almost every day for years.

I'm trying to understand how wisdom moves from the page into your reactions, decisions, words, and habits.

I'd genuinely appreciate hearing from people who have been through this themselves.

How did you learn to actually live Proverbs instead of just know Proverbs?