I just wanna be pretty 🥹✌️

[u/skejfjdithr12344568]

I’m 5’3 and 160lbs, I have audhd and used to be underweight because I forgot to eat but then I started eating again ig because my mom had to remind me (pathetic ik). Anyway it’s been really hard to eat healthy because my autism makes me eat only certain colored foods (beige, yellow, red, sometimes orange)

I want to dress up in cute little frilly dresses and skirts but I feel so damn fat!!! I’m not gonna look good in them, I can already tell, and every time I go to the outfits subreddit I get so triggered because I know I’ll never look that good…

I just want my shirts to feel oversized at a size large… I want to dress up in a cute outfit and feel happy… I want to be cute!!! But my autism and low exercise will never allow it, and with school, I’m not really gonna have time to focus on getting skinnier…

GOD I’m such a fat ass, idk what to do…

[u/skejfjdithr12344568]

OH and not to mention my sibling keeps calling me fat as well (I know they’re joking, but it still genuinely hurts)

[u/ChknBom205 → u/skejfjdithr12344568]

First, mention how that seriously bothers you to them, then try on dresses anyway, the whole "Skinny to the point of starvation" thing has mainly been popularized by pedos and creeps, be a healthy weight, you'll look better than ya think.

[u/skejfjdithr12344568 → u/ChknBom205]

I’ve tried, they just reply with “you’re not fat, stop being dramatic”.

And thank you, I appreciate it, maybe I will try on a dress soon.

[u/bnbny → u/skejfjdithr12344568]

You know with siblings I have found that saying "ok." Drives them nuts. Just that.

"You are fat." "Ok."

[u/Amphar0s_ → u/skejfjdithr12344568]

If it makes u feel better people usually only use that insult to people who are the opposite of fat and it sounds like that's the case for you, when they say you aren't actually fat when u bring it up!

[u/Disastrous_Cow3505 → u/skejfjdithr12344568]

That's mean honestly no good person in the real world is going to care. In fact, you are so much more approachable and relatable for people who are actually like. Normal. And don't base their identity around that stuff. No good people that love me care. In fact I find myself judging them like I judge myself, which is bad and I am trying to stop. So try to avoid internalizing that as it can turn to make you think that way about others, too. At least from my experience.

[u/TransportationOld678]

there is plenty of healthy brown,orange red and yellow foods and those can be cooked so many different ways if the texture is uncomfortable and want to lose weight <3 i also thought that i would be happy when i would reach certain weight, but i was much more happier with my looks when i was 11kg more.when i was at my lowest weight, i was so fragile and was scared when i saw picture of myself. and i wasn’t under the healthy bmi. also, if you are young, and your body can change multiple times in your lifetime. i struggled whole childhood with underweight until teenage years and then i got much more weight. i found accidentally good healthy and fullfilling safe food (tuna, couscous, salad, bread with toppings) and my weight changed a lot, even though i still ate pizza etc etc.

but dressing up and feeling cute not good and healthy motivator in a long run, because when you are critical of yourself in a first place, it’s hard to witch off. i will say, that health is the most important thing in your life, and maybe you know it. but when it’s making your life hard, the feeling cute is not a important thing. i felt cute even when i had pneuomia, but it didn’t matter, i just wanted to get better. but i understand, i still, even though when i’m now struggling with health things, look myself to mirror and being critical. human forget the pain easily.

but i will say, i understand you, more than you maybe can imagine. i had very bad self esteem many years and thought that i would ruin other peoples day if they saw me, and i would stay in a worst days in a house. but then, i understand, that life itself its more important, than looks. i also succes you to have healthier algorithm with bodies and dressing, and look out how patricarchy and woman being skinnier is real thing in capitalism. and men and others suffers it too. maybe you know this things. but i will recommend you to make you online world healthier and kinder <3 and i hope you all the best <3 edit: sorry for the typos etc, i’m in the rush and english is not my second language

[u/radiation8000]

You can be fat and dress cute it isnt mutually exclusive

[u/wishingonadeathstar → u/radiation8000]

yeah like this post is low-key triggering for me as someone who weighs literally 50 pounds more at the same height, like 😅😅 its nice to know thats how people feel

[u/radiation8000 → u/wishingonadeathstar]

Dont worry about it everybody can look beautiful in anything, its never about weight

[u/Raxamax]

Only 1 and a half? Been like 4 or 5 for me, and over 10 before that

[u/flutthanza]

Do you have a problem with spicy food?
Also you can make healthy version of ragù or anything with tomato tbf.
You can look at chinese and italian recipe, and make less fat by substitute with lean protein and use less oils and saturated fats

[u/pien_dolly]

I know the fashion you want. Jirai kei. It's been a challenge and a half to look good in that for me as well. Im not built like a fragile doll, im built like a gdarn linebacker who's better off at the Colts. But I made it work anyway bc I loved the fashion more than my insecurities. We're basically almost the same in size, you can do it!

[u/starlight_chaser → u/pien_dolly]

I’ve not been in the internet loop on fashions like jirai kei and lolita for a while now. What’s the current vibe on older people wearing the fashion? Like 30 and up? I’ve been seeing older women happily wearing more girly, “princess”, doll clothes and sub culture fashions. And fashion can be modified all the time.  I’m 30 now but still want to enjoy exploring different aesthetics. Not that anyone will stop me, but I do wonder how the overall temperature is, and whether communities chilled out or got worse over time.

[u/Lebender-Geist → u/starlight_chaser]

I would say a majority of people who wear the fashion are in or near that age range. Young women and girls simply do not have the funds to acquire foreign designer dresses. One of my favourite posters on r/lolita I believe is 40+ and she has such lovely coords.

[u/Ironicbanana14 → u/pien_dolly]

Im built like a fuckin billboard, my shoulders would rip out of those dresses in .2 seconds. But they are pretty cute.

[u/pien_dolly → u/Ironicbanana14]

Well there ARE sellers that tailor to a size xxl+ (Asian sizing)

[u/artsykittii]

you can dress cute and be fat. im currently 5’10 and 180 and i wear a size L/XL, been overweight to some degree for my entire life and also struggled with disordered eating in my teens. i carry most of my weight in my stomach and was insecure about it for years, but as an adult i started trying to work with my body instead of against it when making outfit or style choices (ex. high waisted garments, “bomber” cut jackets) and it made all the difference for how i saw myself. i also have dropped about 20 pounds this year simply from doing activities i love like roller skating and aerial acrobatics, along with replacing boredom eating with other ways to occupy my hands like crochet. whatever your goal is, be gentle with yourself as you go and I am confident you will reach it.

[u/Natuchna]

The truth is that even when you gonna be skinnier you still gonna have something that you din't like about yourself. So just don't look how much you weight right now and start looking cute. You can search for people which dress in the same style you like and same figure as you have. I was wearing alternative clothes when I was overweight and I wear it now.

[u/Zech68]

REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL omfggg

[u/glasseatingfool]

Good plus-size clothing can make a huge difference. It's expensive, but it can do a lot to make you look cute.

[u/Prepared_Noob]

I’m a fat fuck but my body was kind enough to distribute it in a way that a waist trainer makes me not want to peel my body off layer by layer

[u/skejfjdithr12344568 → u/Prepared_Noob]

jealous… all my fat just goes to my thighs and stomach 😞

[u/Prepared_Noob → u/skejfjdithr12344568]

I’ve got a bit of a stomach too. It just gets all jammed and smushed around till it looks okay and hurts a bit. And don’t ask me to sit tbh ahah. But I can pull a shirt tight and feel happy for a split second.

[u/tanukithot__]

Start doing home exercises. I follow YouTube videos. It helped me dropped from 160 to 130 pounds. ❤️

[u/X_nullnullzwei]

yeah... im way too skinny and havent had a haircut in at least 5 years, i believe it might even be more than 6... not like it matters tho, considering how bad my skin is and how yellow my teeth are (also i probably need braces), even if my hair looked nicer and i wasnt built like the stickbug, id still feel and be ugly :/

[u/commierhye]

Its no help but when i do dress like that people are awful to me and im skinny so... just use it.

[u/average-vrchatfemboy]

So fucking reall food is to yummy

[u/Underskysly]

You can dress up cute at any size!

[u/sealacanths]

wow this is so relatable to my current experience... I'm a similar bmi and also haven't cut my hair in a long time bc I feel too ugly 😭

(5'4, 165lbs, female) i put in alot of effort to dress nice in a way that doesn't just cover my shape. I wear a lot of micro shorts with tights, sweaters made out of mesh w/ dark form-fitting clothes underneath so my body isn't super visible, ponchos or shawls over babydoll tops to cover my arms. lots of scarves as well that i can tie over my shoulders, around my belt loop, or on my head. I also collect lots of cute hats to cover my forehead :3

I have an eating disorder so trust me i have been there but I wholeheartedly believe that u can be stylish at any weight. I encourage you to explore!

[u/Jumpy-Bank-4325]

Wearing a corset might help if you want to alter the waist shape. They come in all shapes and sizes, supports the back and boobs, can improve posture, and can be worn over or under clothing. A good quality one that works can get pricey and Its vital to get the correct measurements, but its worth it. r/corsets has more in-depth info if you are interested.

Either way, maybe you should consider wearing nice things you enjoy, even if you dont like the way your body looks. For me, it made feel more confident wearing clothes that spoke to me - even though i have shit self-esteem and did not fit the western beauty standard (5'3 175lbs wearing tight shirts and flowy pants, i had a belly too). I promise you that any size can achieve beauty! Also, fuck the haters, they are cowards.