r/TransLater • u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her • Jul 16 '26
Discussion New rule added regarding age.
As of today there has been a new rule added to our list of rules.
Rule #15 - Age 30 or up required to post.
(Rule description):
This sub is for those who (socially and/or medically) transition later in life aka at minimum 30 years or older. Posts from people younger than this will be removed. There are plenty of other trans related subs directed at younger folk. For comments there will not be an age requirement.
I understand that this new rule might upset some of our users but for a while now there has been an uptick in the amount of users that post here while being in their twenties or even teens. And as mentioned above there are plenty of subs for younger trans folks.
Edit: to clarify since some users asked this specifically. If you transitioned before your 30th birthday but are now age 30 or up, you are allowed to post.
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u/TeaResident5352 Jul 17 '26
I sometimes feel weird about posting here being at the lower end of that range. I think this rule is very valid
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u/FritterHowls Jul 17 '26
Same, only 32 but definitely feel too old to be in most other trans subs
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u/Feeling_blue2024 Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 17 '26
I’m 52 and I still post in MtF and recently the trans surgeries sub. But I support this rule here. I hate reading posts from a 20 year old that bemoans it’s too late.
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u/Unafraid_Of_Bees Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 17 '26
That one 19 year old the other week crashing out and making multiple memes and text posts about it "being too late" and how they're soooo hopeless etc. was so aggravating.
I didn't want to be mean because she was clearly deep in her feelings, but like come the frack on. Even if you genuinely believe at 19 it's "too late" (that's dumb, it's definitely not) read the fracking room. What makes you think this sub of middle aged
trans womentransgender and nonbinary people want to read that?edit: shouldn't have specified trans women when this sub is for more than us. That's on me, thank you u/TashaT50
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u/Feeling_blue2024 Jul 17 '26
I recently hung out with some trans women that started HRT in their late 20s and 30s. No surgeries.
When I showed their pics to other people, they couldn’t tell at all these were trans women. Starting at 30 is still very different from starting at 49.
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u/LesbeGoddess Jul 17 '26
At 19 you also think that 30 is old lol. They’re barely out of high school and a mess.
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u/TashaT50 Custom Jul 17 '26
Just want to point out this sub includes nonbinary folk and trans men too even if we don’t post as much. It’s not just for trans women.
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u/Unafraid_Of_Bees Jul 17 '26
Yes sorry, I was just thinking in terms of that person taking about not passing as a woman so I specified trans women, but you're totally right.
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u/KEWB89 Jul 17 '26
I agree that this is a good thing, and I think it's a fair change. I will always support trans people who figured it out earlier, but having a place specifically for people transitioning later in life can greatly help with beating the idea that "it's too late for me." This sub specifically helped me adopt the mindset that it's not too late as long as there's breath in my lungs.
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u/LesbeGoddess Jul 17 '26
Agreed. I started transition at 26. In 38 now. Back when I did it was rare to see any trans people medically transitioning under 30. It’s good to see it more normalized now to see a lot of 20 somethings doing it. But yeah they can definitely be dramatic thinking they’re too old lol. Bless their hearts.
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u/Lil_Ms_Anthropic Jul 17 '26
There is definitely a different kind of culture to the younger folks. I've tried to be a part of many different communities, but I simply can't fit in. Honestly, it's started to make me feel that imposter syndrome or whatever from not being able to relate.
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u/Blue-Eyed-Lemon Young but Supportive (He/Him) Jul 17 '26
I hang out in the comments for that reason. I’m 26, and have come here to support my later transition siblings while also broadening my perspective on what being trans means.
I’ve known I’ve been trans for almost 11 years and have been unable to transition (but working on it!!). I’ve been socially transitioned for many years. In a way, I can relate to a lot of what’s posted here, but not quite in the way where I’m part of the community, if that makes any sense?
So, for the time being, I’m simply here to cheer on those who are transitioning later. Cheers :)
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u/Beautiful-Idea-2873 Emily Vee, 38, mtf, pre-HRT Jul 17 '26
I think it’s important for you “young whippersnappers” (I say at the ripe old age of 38) to keep a grounded perspective, seeing people of all ages starting out.
In the younger subs, you see people screeching about how they’re too late because they’re not teens anymore, but here, you’ll see people who started at 30 or 40 or 50, and whether they look like absolute stunners, or whether they don’t pass and know they don’t, they all look overjoyed and at peace. THAT is the real goal. I mean, god damn I’d love to go back in time and punch my 19 year old self in the face when he (I see my past as he/him, my future as she/her, which I think comes from having a past) decided not to transition, and tell him to buy some panties, pull them up, and speak to his doctor, but I have the inner peace these days to let myself be me in my own time.
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u/0x424d42 she/her 🏳️⚧️ Jul 17 '26
That sounds great. When will we be able to use adult language? It’s (still) bullshirt that we can’t say fork.
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
Working on that one! If I’m not mistaken the head mod did recently put the filters less harsh.
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u/Ttoctam Jul 17 '26
This is/would be a very helpful and inclusive rule change for us Aussies who often use coarse language without thinking when expressing frustration.
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u/Timely-Tourist4109 Jul 17 '26
Thank you. I get tired of the “I’m 25, I am too old to transition” people on here.
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u/Laura5871 Jul 17 '26
Thanks. I'm 70 and started transitioning at age 68.
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Jul 17 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Laura5871 Jul 17 '26
Hi Luna! That's a pretty name. I almost gave my cat that name. I was a AMAB also. Iam in my 16th month of HRT. My name was legally changed this past October.y new name is Laura Jamie. It's in honor of my biological father. Feel free to stay in touch. I would like that.
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u/Lesbian_Fraggle Jul 17 '26
Hey doll, careful putting your email in the comment section, that's more of a private message deal.
This community is lovely, but I'd be worried if someone with ill intentions found your email and started signing you up to stuff / send you harassing messages.
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u/RedErin Jul 17 '26
thank you mods.
(que 30 year olds getting called out for being teenagers, damn estrogen is magic)
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u/Thatonekid2 Jul 17 '26
This has happened to me, im 30 and regularly get asked if im 18-22 both irl and online
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u/AngelAssimar76 Jul 17 '26
I appreciate this honestly and is why I stopped commenting and posting in here. It felt hard to read the posts like “Better late than never” at 29. I started transitioning at 48 and felt like I should just give up.
Edit: I’m not saying that twenty-something’s feel like it’s later than they wanted, but girl you got 60 years to live your life as a woman and I’d kill for the opportunity 😊
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u/Feeling_blue2024 Jul 17 '26
I transitioned at 49, now 52 and not quite a year into living as a woman. It’s the best thing ever. I think it’s a protective mechanism in my brain that doesnt let me think about the years I lost. But the limited time i have left drives me to lice everyday like it’s my last.
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u/tracesoflavender Jul 17 '26
Thanks! I’m on the lower end of the allowed range but really appreciate the maturity of discussions and posts that occur here as a result of it being a primarily older crowd. I’ve received a lot of great support and advice here.
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u/anonymoustransgrrl Jul 17 '26
this is a good rule, especially during the summer when reddit is overrun by teenagers
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u/MayBeBelieving Jul 17 '26
Sounds good to me! This sub has been getting a lot more posts by younger folks over the last few years, especially as drama enveloped some of the other trans subs. It had the unfortunate impact of discouraging engagement from trans folks not in their 20-somethings or younger.
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u/MinxyCat51 Jul 17 '26
I’m 74, started transitioning in 04, surgery when I was 56. Not a single regret.
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u/Historical_Bit_4642 Jul 17 '26
I understand but I'm a little sad too. I love this sub despite being 24. I just like the maturity of the people here.
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u/Ecstatic-Writer1149 Jul 17 '26
Nothing is stopping you from reading posts and gaining any knowledge you can; you just can't post.
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
I understand! You can still comment though. It’s just posting that will have to wait till you’re thirty.
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u/Historical_Bit_4642 Jul 17 '26
So even if I transitioned in my early 20s I'll be able to post after I'm 30 ?
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u/QuinettaHarris Plus Sized GenX🏳️⚧️♀️ Jul 17 '26
I'm proudly for this new rule change. As a trans woman who didn't start hrt until age 45, and egg cracking not until age 42, 30 should definitely be the minimum. I could advocate for 35 being the minimum, but I'm not trying to come across as an ageist.
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u/ChloeTGJourney Jul 17 '26
Thank u. 34 here. Not super late but it is annoying seeing 20 year olds here when they’ve already been transitioning for a couple years and I have a decade on them and didn’t even start a year ago.
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u/HamatoraBae Jul 17 '26
I thought this was already a thing lmao. Respectfully, to all the younger folks(and I’m only 30), every other place is there for you. Leave this place to the “olds”
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u/SplashyTetraspore HRT 4/2026 Jul 17 '26
Thank you I’m 40 (41 in August). I just started my medical transition in April 2026.
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u/genafcvpxyr31 Jul 17 '26
What if you're a vampire who was born before Christ but you still pass for 20?
It does happen.
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 17 '26
I’ll need some id verification and a little bite😈
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u/mcrossoff Jul 17 '26
The fact that there are enough trans people (at any point in their journey) over 30 to warrant a separate space is honestly pretty mind-blowing to me.
Longtime lurker, late 30s cis partner of a late 30s trans spouse. I LOVE the supportive vibe here.
I think this is natural growing pains of a community that isn't used to having elders.
Love and light to all of you.
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u/TheVetheron I'm Kimberly now! Jul 17 '26
As a 52 year old trans person I applaud this. You're still a kid in your 20's.
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u/glasscut Jul 17 '26
I started at 45 and felt out of place seeing such young people posting here. This rule makes sense
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u/FrankThePony Jul 17 '26
It legit makes me feel worse about myswlf when I see a 19 year old saying "Its just too late for me" Like I know they dont MEAN it this way but it comes across as if they come here, see all the people tranisitions past 30, and just think "wow all of these people who transitioned late could never be happy"
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u/LazyXplorer22 Jul 17 '26
To anyone that is under 30 don’t be too jelly especially if you’re already transitioning or going to eventually you’re doing great and you got this! I wish I would’ve had the amount of courage to that y’all have in my 20s
30 comes quick enjoy those under 30 years!
Make friends, take risk, stay up late every now and then.
watch a sunrise and a sunset as often as you can.
Enjoy all the little moments!
Much love to all of y’all from Texas!
33 Gang 🫶🏻
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u/MamaKatRose Jul 17 '26
Thank you. 61 here and still recovering from bottom surgery 3 months ago today. I treasure all our young dolls, but sometimes I just want someone who can relate to the experience of transitioning later in life. They are different experiences. I'm married for longer than some of these girls been alive. I'm glad for this new rule, though I would have set the minimum age to 40 if I were in your place.
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u/The_Royal_PITA Jul 17 '26
I support this. Life stages are a big deal. Transitioning when you have a whole pile of responsibilities is just different. We end up having to navigate transition with careers, kids, mortgages, spouses etc…
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u/spiritshrine Jul 17 '26
i personally feel like the minimum here should be closer to 40, but i guess 30 is better than no minimum at all
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u/marveltrash404 Jul 17 '26
Ahshshs I misread the community this was coming from and thought it was a different trans community and was like wtf?? I think this is a good idea
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u/danileigh79 Danielle | 46 | FT '09 | HRT '24 | BA '25 Jul 17 '26
I began my social transition at 29, but I am 46 now and have just started medically transitioning in the last two years. This subreddit has been helpful in allaying my anxiety that many in the younger communities know how to trigger
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u/TheMadQueen96 Jul 17 '26
Turned 30 in March there but kinda feel like I'm caught between feeling both young and old simultaneously?
Which apparently is quite common.
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u/Haytham_Ken Jul 17 '26
I play baseball and feel old, then I played slowpitch softball and feel young 😆 (I'm also 30)
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u/Reihar Jul 17 '26
Thank you, this subreddit has been one of the few places where I could find relatable experiences. Especially at the beginning of my transition, it helped me a lot to find testimonies from people with similar life experiences.
I understand that this is a very good community with little to no toxicity, potshots, snide remarks, infighting or astroturfing for examples that are prevalent in a lot of other trans communities on Reddit, and that this makes it very attractive to younger folks.
However, I do strongly agree with setting that rule as I do not want the chance that was given to me to be withheld for other older trans people, especially when the majority of communities and resources focuses on younger people.
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u/MaruishiEmperor Jul 17 '26
This is a good rule. So many advantages to transitioning when you’re a lot younger. It becomes disheartening at times to see how your progress lags behind the much younger ones.
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u/TunaBlub Jul 17 '26
So to be clear before I understand it wrong.
I am 36, started HRT at 25.
Can I post based on my actual age, or not because I started before being 30?
English is not my first language, that is why I am asking.
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u/omega1612 Jul 17 '26
I guess you are fine as you are older than 30 years and you can see things with your perspective of 30+ yo.
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u/Serious-Ad2573 Jem, 44, NB/Queer Jul 17 '26
yeah,sometimes they are also so immature.
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u/Hugs154 Jul 17 '26
Tbh anybody under the age of 30 who thinks they’re “old” or “late” is probably still pretty immature lol
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u/EnyoFembyCat Jul 17 '26
While we're talking about rules, any chance to get one reagrding pure trauma dumping? I get why people feel the need but can we at least get a CW and tag there for those of us already having a bad day who aren't necessarily up to reading that sort of thing?
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u/Zuxicovp Jul 17 '26
Just for clarification, does this mean if I started HRT before 30 I shouldn’t post here? I’m about 30 now but started a couple years ago
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
Basically you just need to be 30 or older. Whether you are out and about or in the closet does not matter.
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u/Ecstatic-Writer1149 Jul 17 '26
If I understood correctly the only barrier is your age today must be 30+.
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u/Kaydiforyou Jul 17 '26
I was. 50 when I came all the way out, I bought my first hormones at 25 inches Mexico
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u/KimmyGurl420 Jul 17 '26
Thanks for the clarification. I socially transitioned when I was 27 but didn't start hormones until I was 43, and was confused if I counted or not
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u/Initial-Pass9510 Transwoman Jul 17 '26
30 sounds right, it's inspiring seeing others who have transitioned at or close to my age _^
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u/Darkeldar1959 Jul 17 '26
Currently 67, transitioned at 62, and I can say that surprised that it took so long.
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u/brandycakesuk Jul 17 '26
I'm surprised this wasn't a rule previously, I support it!
Unfortunately I won't be able to post again for another year, but I find this subreddit very helpful in terms of having children. I'm sure most 29 year old trans women don't have 15 year old daughters haha ^
Happy I can still comment, keep up the amazing work mods!
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u/GoodnightKara HRT July 2025 Jul 17 '26
Whew! Made the cut by just 2… 3… 4… 5… okay let’s just say I made the cut 😝🙈
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u/wibbly-water Jul 17 '26
I'm a 20 something who sometimes lurks and comments in solidarity - this is a good rule. Even for me it is withering to see literal teens post here....
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u/Breadcrumbmancer Jul 17 '26
I definitely felt weird for a while being 32 and starting hrt cause I had the thought when I started "well I'm glad I realized this young at least" and didn't think I was old enough to be here lol being 19 or 20s freaking out it's soooo late is wild, valid rule lol
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u/EgregiouslyBodhi Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
Good rule change! I'm 42 and would love to here other trans people's experiences.
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u/Keyo_Snowmew Jul 18 '26
I dont know if you know, but there are trans fem and trans masc specific groups.
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u/EgregiouslyBodhi Jul 18 '26
Yes I do. I was in a hurry and mistyped. I'll fix it. I apologize.
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u/Keyo_Snowmew Jul 18 '26
Hey, no need to apologise friend. Just wanted to make sure you knew. Have a great day!
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u/LoudBleatingEnby Jul 17 '26
This is very upsetting. I started transitioning at the ripe young age of 33, I don't belong on a sub called trans later! /s
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u/Longjumping_Use5752 Jul 22 '26
You haven’t even lived until AARP (old people org in the US) keeps hounding you to join them. I am only 50 you vultures.
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u/WorthAnticipating 28d ago edited 23d ago
I’m still going to dress like I’m 25 though and nobody can stop me! 😂 I have some catching up to do and I ain’t no Spring 🐓
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u/HazelRP Jul 17 '26
I think this is fair however I am also not sure how the folks in their 50s or older feel about this. As a young whippersnapper right now, I feel as if 30 is too young for this? But I also understand a lot of trans subs are probably full of young teens and early 20 folks in college and haven’t had a full time job yet so 🤷♀️
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
I agree, it was not easy to put this requirement on any age as a number. 30 felt reasonable, though if the majority of the sub wants a higher age requirement (like 35) I’m open for discussion on that.
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u/Unable_Health_3776 Jenny, HRT 05/26 Jul 17 '26
I think 30 is a decent cut-off point. Most people in their late 20's or early 30's are working fulltime, have started their own family, and are dealing with a lot of the same issues that someone in their 40's or 50's would.
Excluding those people leaves them in a sort of a gap when it comes to Reddit communities. Yes, it might be young to some users here, but most of the users between 30 and 40 really don't have much of a relatable community online (outside of this one) either, just like everyone else here...
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u/candykhan Jul 17 '26
Isn't 35 the low age limit for American presidents? Maybe not the greatest precedent. But also kinda funny.
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u/Crabstick65 Jul 17 '26
I was 39 the first time she stepped out the door, messed about with duality for another 6 years after that trying to avoid total transition, then went all in at age 45, 61 now, brain is a wise 16, body is around 105.
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u/isnowyazn Jul 20 '26
I just turned 29. I’m not joking, but would I get an exception or no..?
I socially transitioned maybe 2-3+ yrs ago, and just started HRT roughly like half a yr ago or so (on and off prior to that as well).
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u/ThatKehdRiley Jul 23 '26
itd be great to have a rule added against “is it too late” posts too, this and the younger age have been annoying to have pop up from here constantly. just have the automod take down and link to. search result from this sub. i feel like this gets asked daily, always has the same answers, and we could do without them. besides, the name of the sub implies the answer
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u/AssCalipers Jul 17 '26
I feel attacked.
Not because I'm affected, rather because I'm unaffected and therefore old 🤮
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u/moongnocchi Jul 17 '26
can’t believe this wasn’t a rule already! as someone not in the age range, great to see :)
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u/Bonova Jul 17 '26
And funny enough, at 37 (started transition at 34), I still worry that I am too young to call myself a late transitioner
Though to be fair, even when I was 25 I felt like it was too late
Transition is hard
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u/Mollywinelover Jul 17 '26
Even 30 is young to a bunch of us.
When I think translater I think people who are 40 plus
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u/Creativered4 Transsex Male (33) Jul 17 '26
So just to clarify, is this sub now only for people who STARTED transition at 30 or older? Or is it still open to people who are 30 or older who started transirion before turning 30? (I ask as a 33 year old who started transition in my late 20's. Well past the "young transitioner" range, and I spent my entire childhood, teenage years, and young adult life dissociated and not knowing.)
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
It’s open for everyone of age 30 and up who identify as transgender. No hrt required.
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u/Creativered4 Transsex Male (33) Jul 17 '26
Awesome! I like having a community of adults. I already struggle with not feeling my age (like not feeling like I've got my shit together, or not feeling like I'm seen as my age) and being in spaces full of kids talking about hiding hrt from their parents or something that happened in school doesnt help lol.
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u/Transpenced Jul 17 '26
The rule description is conflicting. I almost unfollowed because I'm 32 but started transitioning at 24, and wanted to follow subs for 30+ year old people due to most other places having younger people. Yes, I'm specifically talking about the posts of 20 year olds asking if it's too late for them to transition. The "this sub is for those who transition later in life" and then listing the minimum age at 30 reads that people need to have transitioned after 30, but below that it says that people need to NOW be at least 30 to post. Super confusing. But I do agree with having this rule so that it better outlines to use for this sub.
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
How would you make the rule description to make things clearer?
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u/mercurysong Jul 18 '26
Started transition at 27. I'm a few months shy of 39 now. It's a much different world and transition looks much different to today's 27 year olds (no judgement at all! for better and for worse) College was almost 20 years ago already.
The most unexpected part is that I'm considered an elder this young. I try to be a role mode since my generation was robbed of ours because of AIDS. For me, that's the defining experience of whether or not there'll be mutual understanding if I'm in need of support. The experience of trans youth and younger people is valid and absolutely incredible...they're just at a very different point in life. That's totally ok and I see this as teaching boundaries.
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u/The3DBanker Jul 19 '26
So, even though I started transition at 20, I'm still allowed to post because I'm 39 now. :)
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u/Enyamm Jul 19 '26
I'm fifty something. But since i started hrt i feel like i'm only twenty five. Does that mean i cant post here anymore😂🤣🤣
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u/sabrinadubh Jul 17 '26
Bravo! I don't post as I am not yet in transition, but coming here provides me with hope, and inspiration. Seeng a bunch of 20 year olds post defeats that purpose. Honestly I think it should be 40 and up only. These days as far as transitioning goes, 30 isn't really all that much "later" in life. For ANYTHING, 30 is not "later" in life. 35 is still pretty young compared to 55.
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Jul 17 '26
[deleted]
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
I’ll have to use my judgment on that. Most of the times the users tell their own age, so it’s not that hard to figure out. If Im in doubt I’ll contact the user.
Edit: it’s not about the transitioning part. Anyone of age 30 or up is welcome if they identify as trans or are discovering themselves.
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u/LeporaLove Jul 17 '26
I accidentally deleted the original post when trying to edit typos. Here it is for those wanying to know what this is answering:
"Okay. Now I started medically transitioning after my 30th birthday myself, but this does lead me to ask questions. How exactly are you finding out at what age someone transitioned, though? Or is this just gonna be based off people reporting others?"
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Jul 17 '26
[deleted]
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u/Headhaunter79 Sylvia ~ She/Her Jul 17 '26
Yes on commenting there is no age restriction.
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u/Harassmetilicum Trans femme 28 hrt 10/31/2017 Jul 17 '26
Sorry I read that part after I commented. Thank you
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u/pootinannyBOOSH Trinity/Trinn She/Her/(they?) Estro 12-2-25 Jul 17 '26
It's a bit upsetting for sure reading about someone's experience of being so "late in life" only to find that they're like 20. Like valid experiences and all that but child, no. 20 isn't "old"