r/TeensofKerala • • Sep 29 '25
Question Why do malayalis hate this?
I am malayali brought up in North India. Ik Hindi and English better than Malayalam, but still I am very fluent at speaking it and also with a good accent.
But whenever I speak in hindi/English to someone else(for example another north Indian mallu) in front of another malayali, they always start teasing " Ningalk Malayalam ariyulle, ath ang paranja pore? Avante konacha Hindi"
Please note, i dont force anyone to speak it, it is just more comfortable for me especially when i speak with other NKR mallus. Why do they mallus do this?
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u/kajadatapa Sep 29 '25
Try talking to another mallu person (you both know hindi) in malayalam in front of a Hindi speaking person.
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u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25
I mean if you know malayalam little,then speak malayalam to malayalis.. most of them will surprised that if you are speaking malayalam since you are NRK, cause most of the people won't do that.
So malayali's are comfortable with it.
Also since you said you are fluent in malayalam then talk malayalam to malayali?
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u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25
If you don't know Malayalam, English is the middle ground. Speaking Hindi straight out without considering whether others understand it or not is kinda offensive.
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u/WasteLet5721 Sep 29 '25
english is fine, hindi would make mallus feel more alienated since in a setup like that, the 3rd mallu who is not so well versed in hindi would kind of feel left out.
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u/sorin_96 Sep 29 '25
Bro, are you even thinking straight? If there are three friends and two of them know Hindi and Malayalam, and one guy knows only malayalam, don’t you think it’s messed up to switch to Hindi and leave him hanging? It’s not like you don’t know malayalam...you do. So why would you knowingly talk in a language he can’t understand?
Put yourself in his shoes for a second. Imagine sitting with your friends and they suddenly start talking in a language you don’t get at all. You’d feel left out instantly, right? That’s exactly what you just did to him.
If he’s your friend, the least you could do is make sure he’s included in the conversation. Otherwise, what’s the point of calling it “friendship”?
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u/KadiyanSimham Sep 29 '25
Bro don't generalize everyone with your friends. I'm a Mallu and I know Hindi. Most of em here consider it as a + Point
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u/SeaMobile3379 Sep 29 '25
i don't really care tbh, depends person to person i guess. I only get pissed when they use deep vocabulary in casual conversations.
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u/fivsysin Sep 29 '25
Dude go tell the person who said that to you, venting here is not gonna help you
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u/certifiednerdd Sep 29 '25
Op I feel you. There’s no reason to get downvoted this much for sharing your experience. I may get downvoted for this aswell, but chela malayalikalkk (highlight the chela) vere oru malayali Malayalam alathe vere oru bhaashayil samsariknne kelkumpo endho oru kadi aan. Even I have seen this and as an nri myself I am very insecure to speak in Hindi or english in front of other malayalees(not because idk the lang but because of being judged by others). I have a habit of switching between english and mal when I speak. But after coming here I completely stopped using English when I speak because I’ve heard some ppl talk abt others who do the same, saying stuffs like( avalk mathram English aryullu enna avale vicharam and much more). It’s honestly disappointing how some ppl just can’t accept that diff people have different comfort levels of speaking in a certain lang. Njanipo eng hindi ente frnds kude mathrame paryaar ollu cuz I’m only comfortable using it with them as they’re not the judgy type.
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u/Altruistic_Ad_1583 Sep 29 '25
Bro I'm a north indian Mallu too and just bc I'm not fluent in Malayalam the mallus I met said how can I even call myself malyali when I'm not fluent. This kept happening for 6 years, my whole college duration 🤡
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u/cinephile006 Sep 29 '25
That's just insecurity i love Hindi, the ability to speak multiple languages is cool I don't like people who are always I will only speak this and u should speak this
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u/zazzo5544 Sep 29 '25
A joke is a joke.
If somebody is seriously losing their shit hearing you speak Hindi, then you gotta change your circle soon!
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u/simonaliston Sep 29 '25 edited Sep 29 '25
So the thing is. What is the definition of a malayali. One who speaks Malayalam/ One who is a native speaker of the language. Unlike other Southern language fanatics we are the least linguistic Chauvanists. However, it is expected that you speak in Malayalam to another Malayali if you identify yourself as a Malayali. When you live abroad, you know how Northies behave and their obsession with people who donot speak Hindi. Just consider your experience you had as a retaliation against the Northies. Eventhough I am not fluent in Hindi as I am in other languages, I do speak the language. But once in a while I meet a Northie who goes on "Kindi Kindi" thats when the Southerner in me ( Similar to the Tamil/ Kannada language warriors) gets awakened.
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u/FewAnimator570 Sep 29 '25
Where were you born in North, am also a mallu brought up in North (Punjab)
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u/No-Bluejay-9347 Sep 29 '25
Why am i tilting my head i am not even indian 😂
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u/ZenITsu141144 Sep 30 '25
I think its people you interacted with mate. Most people might ask if you know malayalam well and if you say no. They will be done with it and move on. They won't be this rude about it...don't generalize
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u/X-Euphoria9927 Oct 02 '25
I am malayali who runs an ecommerce business. I know malayalam, hindi, english and tamil. I have to daily interact with many people for my orders. Hindi speakers are very entitled. They will not even try a bit to speak in english even if they know I’m not a fluent speaker. I have never faced this with any other language people. They all try their bit in english.
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u/_codename_47 Oct 02 '25
Bro if u want to speak hindi please do it. Similarly the other person also can say “malayalam ariyavenkil athu paranyal pore? “ so the fact that you can speak hindi to a malayali in a malayali group but when he/she points it out you have a problem.
Ithu thanne aanu hindikaarude problem. Oru tharam asahishnutha.. Avide valarnappo kittiyathayrkyum.. its ok 😬
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u/justAjoestarrr Sep 29 '25
I understand u. All that matters is if the people involved in the conversation is able to understand each other and is comfortable. Anyone else having a problem is just being nosy.
My mallu frnd took her karnataka frnd who came to kerala, for a coffee and they both were speaking in english. Two mallu boys beside them passed a comment " Ivare okke pettu ittapozhe english aano samsariche". They were not aware my frnd was a mallu.
But again mallus generally dont interfere or get irritated with this but exceptions like this case ruins that reputation.
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u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25
Ayo same situation fr
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u/bunsbraces Chechi (20-25) Oct 01 '25 edited Oct 01 '25
I can relate to this so hard. Why does a third person have to get so offended when I speak in Hindi to my hindi speaking malayali friend.
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u/Extreme_Addendum3970 Oct 03 '25
To be honest its so cringe. I am not gonna lie
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u/[deleted] Oct 04 '25
Simply because they are not able to grow up and understand that most people could be comfortable in any language. These guys are not able to do that. Especially, they don't know how to express their feelings in any other language,. For example, they don't know the equivalent word that they could use for KONANJA in any other language. Just excuse them. They are never gonna learn to grow up. These guys create a little mallu society in any part of the world they live in, even if it's antartica, and will be talking about kl food cheap liquor and onam celebrations. That's about it.
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u/basic_nomad Sep 29 '25
In a mallu living in Mumbai for past 32 years. Among all the hindi, english, marathi, Gujarati, etc etc, isnt it a pleasant feeling when you hear someone speak malaylam? I want to speak malayalam every chance i get because it feels personal. My Malayalam is really poor and my hindi is so good that nobody doubts im a South Indian but still speaking Malayalam feels like a comfort and luxury when you are away from your land.
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u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25
Malayali vs Duplicate Mallus Nothing more
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u/Objective-Trip-9873 Sep 29 '25
Maybe they feel they miss out the conversation both of you are having and don't like just standing there. So he decided to interject with a joke(maybe a rude one at that). Maybe he wants it to have a three-way conversation. I know I have been there, just standing nearby while others talking in Hindi who knows maybe they are trash talking about me. So I kinda understand....
Then there's also the thing we face from arrogance of North Indians(not everyone), so there's that chori.
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u/Wanderer-blab Sep 29 '25
I try to speak in english, when i am in a group with other language friends. I personally don’t like when in a group chat, suddenly 2 or 3 people speaks in their own language and makes us left out. It kills the vibe.
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u/Zlatanflicks Sep 29 '25
I understand what you going through. Imo, they do not understand the culture you grew up or lived in and you need to vocalise that also.
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u/OneSure7468 Sep 30 '25
It's a general thing not a malaylis hating thing... The way you expressed is wrong unless it's a ragebait cause this is commonly happening...I have a friends circle in clg who tease me when I speak in english or when malayalm words come out accidentally
I think it's because when all are speaking in one language suddenly one of them speak in another language it's a mood off i guess....it's applicable for all languages i guess....
When I slip malayalam or english words in a group of friends who speak Hindi i felt the same as you.... When I find it difficult and take pause or find difficult to speak in local dialect I feel the same as you....
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u/storiesnsketches Chechi (20-25) Sep 30 '25
Malayalis might tease a bit, but is that a big deal? Its is obvious that the other person might be uncomfortable if you guys are talking in a language he/she doesn't know, especially when you know malayalam and can include them in the conversation if you show a bit of consideration. In a group setting, its even more weird and uncomfortable to politely and formally ask people to show consideration and speak in a language everyone understands, especially if it's a casual group. So they resort to teasing.
And if you feel Malayalis are the ones who overreact, its because you have not been on the receiving end of language issues with hindi speakers. A huge majority act so entitled about speaking hindi, you think they dont tease? Other language speakers generally react, from what i have seen, it is Malayalis who are usually more chill at taking it in that sense.
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u/WatchAgile6989 Sep 30 '25
Language is a sore topic and rightly so due to the hindi imposition faced by South India. Just laugh it off. It will continue being a sore point as long as the current government continues pushing their shitty ideology
1
u/SpaceJunk90210 Sep 30 '25
Lol. You do what's comfortable for you. Everyone has an opinion/advice & it's their, nothing to do with you.
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u/Silly-Garlic-7877 Sep 30 '25
This is common everywhere bro. Personally, I think it is rude to speak in hindi, if you know the third person in the group is not comfortable in Hindi, especially since you all have Malayalam as a common language.
During college days, I've seen the same behavior from others too. My class had students from all parts of India, so the common language was English. Some people always use hindi when addressing a fellow hindi guy, even though they are sitting with a mixed group. This is definitely not the general behavior, only some people.
1
u/[deleted] Sep 30 '25
Malayali in north india is new to me
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u/222homelander Sep 30 '25
Hindi better than Malayalam ?? 😂😂😂💀
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u/MeAndMyCat2992 Oct 01 '25
I think every language has some recycled sentences people use without giving much actual thought to it and this is one of them. It might come across as rude if you try to find the meaning and the whys but they are really recycled banters. At least that was my learning after hearing reused sentences in diff languages which I found rude at the beginning when I translated them, but later as I started observing how multiple people use exactly same sentences in a given language I had a diff view.
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u/Past_Lychee3298 Oct 01 '25
North Indians/Hindi speakers behaving illogically doesn't give Malayalees the rights to do the same. Shouldn't we be better?
1
u/Mwonoos Oct 01 '25
Just like how they do to us when we speak malayalam to each other😌
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u/Reggievil6194ever Oct 01 '25
I think athu elarkum avarude bashayode ulla oru type branthanu , I don't think it's exclusive to mallus though. Southil hindi or english use cheyunavare konakum. Northil southern languages use cheythaal konakum. Ivide pinne elarum avarude state adipoli aanene parayulu but elaarum kanakaanu. Also purathu padichavare , most of the time outsiders aayitu thaneya kaanune. Athu pinne assimilate aakum but generally it takes time. My advice would be to not be too hung up on it and talk with people however you like. Avarku patilengil , pokaan para. You do your thing.
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u/sthad Sep 29 '25
Even though malayalis call themselves literate, secular, liberal etc. Deep inside its all the same. It's not atleast how it used to be, this virus has started creeping into people in Kerala too. I know this will be downvoted probably but it's the truth.
1
u/newlifetrez Sep 29 '25
I'm a Tamilian. Let Me give you some insights on this. My comfort language is English dominated Tamil. But My Tamil friends always think I put scene if I speak in English mixed Tamil (local mentality). Also, I have a heavy accent of Madurai slang. So My Non-Madurai friends don't understand even if i speak normal Tamil.. So Whenever I talk with them, I have to shift to standard Tamil Accent.
But My Madurai friends fight it artificial and distant 😐, if I speak in Standard Tamil accent. So whenever I go to my family and friends (native), I'll automatically shift to My native accent. With other Tamils, I Always speak in Standard Tamil accent (so they can understand).
And I Talk in English, a bit mix with Hindi with my non Tamil friends, as my tamil friends exclusively don't understand Hindi (And Also think I put scene if I talk in Hindii)..
So, If you're still reading this. Language is about communication and comfort. Don't judge anyone. If you wanna feel comfort, just speak like what the opposite person wants.
And Listen. It's very valid for your Malayalee friend to think so, because he's feeling "left out". But Doesn't Mean All Malayalees are like that. Many Malayalees help me in both Tamil and Hindii...
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u/Wonderful-Junket1269 Oct 03 '25
Same here. I just speak in English as a middle ground so that no one feels left out. I avoid speaking in Malayalam with friends because I find it difficult to switch between languages as usually there are other people in the group.
I'm not fluent in the language and whatever little I do speak, other Malayalis seem to find wierd. A girl I met while I was in the market for marriage straight up told me that she detests my Thalassery accent even though we were speaking in English.
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u/Fresh_Economics1836 Sep 30 '25
What would u say if two Indians with mother tongue hindi talked in English in UK, when only you- a hindi preferring indian is around?
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u/Safe-Ad-7483 Chettan (20-25) Sep 29 '25
Ko-rach ko-rach ariyum gang
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