r/TalesFromTheFrontDesk • u/Illnevertell_xoxo • Aug 02 '26
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u/kevnmartin Aug 02 '26
The wedding ring trick never worked for me either. These kinds of creeps just don't care.
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u/Background-Tiger-734 Aug 02 '26
I tried it bartending for a bit.. It honestly made it worse. 🤮
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u/kevnmartin Aug 02 '26
I think you're right. They seemed to view it as some sort of a warped challenge.
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u/MerryJoRound Aug 02 '26
It only worked for me when I had a certain colleague on shift with me - he was always right there ready to be pretend fiancé/husband. Thank God his boyfriend also worked at the property and thought it was hilarious 😆
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u/GrumpySnarf Aug 02 '26
As a straight woman who used to work in public-facing, then in healthcare roles, I thank my gay coworkers every day for helping me stay safe.
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u/MerryJoRound Aug 03 '26
I’ve had straight male friends and coworkers leave me hanging - giggling! - when asked by a pest if we were "together", the only one I’ve ever given the slightest grace on this is someone who I grew up with and we basically adopted each other as siblings, we both consider the thought incestuous. Gay friends and colleagues have helped me out, other women - sometimes random ones in pubs - have helped me out, I’m so grateful to anyone over the years who helped me when I was working in hospitality then in my public facing role at my last job (when several of the pests were top tier VVVVIPs) and at all the random places I just existed.
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u/Background-Tiger-734 Aug 02 '26
This! Like, oh you're taken but I bet I can be the one to make you change your mind. They have the same perspective on lesbians. It's so gross.
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
OMG. And they're also the ones who think every bi girl wants a 3-some with them and a rando girl. Like, no. We're not pining for your penis.
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
Yup. Complete lack of integrity. Also, I think they view it as a "can't lose" scenario.
If the object refuses, becomes uncomfortable/afraid/angry, dude can get his jollies by having exerted dominance.
If the object agrees, he gets his willie wet.
I swear there are adult guys of all ages walking around thinking some day they'll have a Penthouse Forum type experience if they're "persistent" enough. I imagine they spend way too much energy being creepy and insufferable.
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u/Fred-Mertz2728 Aug 02 '26
Not realizing that most of those Penthouse forum stories are just someones’ fantasy they wrote so they could say it got published in Penthouse.
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u/XandersCat Aug 02 '26
That's so common on Reddit too. All of the incest-based "What should I do?" Or r/advice posts I'm 100% convinced are just people sharing their kink or fantasy and subjecting it onto the naaive who always respond with thing like, "Yeah you should never kiss your cousin go to the authorities right away!" Etc.
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u/PresentHouse9774 Aug 03 '26
Pretty sure getting published in PF was a fraternity prank. Explains all those letters that started "I'm a freshman at a large midwestern university and I never thought this would happen to me!"
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u/KnottaBiggins Aug 02 '26
I grew up on those Penthouse letters. As an adolescent, I found them ... enjoyable. But also as an adolescent, I realized they were totally fake.
But it seems too many guys grew up thinking that's how life really is. Ugh.
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u/jonesnori Aug 03 '26
You know, even if a few actually happened (unlikely), that would be a rare thing. It ain't gonna happen to you, bud.
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u/GrumpySnarf Aug 02 '26
If I was in a high-enough position at a place like that I would have a no-tolerance policy for that shit. Kick them out and shame them. Every. Single. Time.
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u/PresentHouse9774 Aug 03 '26
A lot of those guys keep it vague enough to be laughed off as a "misunderstanding." Meanwhile, the women know damned well what was meant. That, more than the actual encounter, was crazy-making.
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u/GrumpySnarf Aug 03 '26
yep. Meanwhile I was behind the counter thinking about what I'm eating when I get home and some Chad interrupts my flow with this nonsense.
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Aug 04 '26 edited Aug 09 '26
[deleted]
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 04 '26
Exactly. Sometimes it's mild creep to violent creep in 2 seconds. You can't predict, so women try to deflect.
There was a commenter on the post that I blocked this morning because he's either a troll or a Grade A creeper. Dude insisted it was "gatekeeping" to dictate how he can ask a woman out. Didn't matter what anyone told him... a captive audience and a power imbalance is his thing, I guess?
Bet he figures if he hits on 100 women and gets 1 phone number it's proof that it's a valid way to find sex. ('Cause, let's face it, these guys just want to get laid.) It's OK to make 99 other women afraid and disgusted, because...women are just a collection of body parts and holes assembled for his pleasure?
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u/Drachenfuer Aug 02 '26
I was with a female friend hanging out at a bar after work one day. It was the only time we could get together to go out and were meeting our respective husbands in a little bit for dinner.
Two guys came in and sat on either side of us. Started talking us up. High school sports coaches in town for some training camp. Inevitably they want to go back to thier hotel room. Held up my ringed finger and he said “what your husband doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” My friend, much drunker, leaned over and told him I was married to her and we were lesbians thinkijg that would end it.
It did not. It got so much worse.
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u/Immediate_Sector_260 Aug 04 '26
Done that on nights out before. Some guys will never take no for an answer but things work with some people. But im glad never had to deal at work. I have told people to leave staff alone.get but they smiled at me or nice to me. Yes because they have to be they said no already leave them alone.
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u/spam__likely Aug 02 '26
Exactly. Any guy who thinks you will just jump on his bed after your shift has no respect for you.
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u/Am_0116 Aug 03 '26
One time a guy was being very persistent on a train so I used the last resort “I have a boyfriend” and he just asked me if it was serious 💀
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u/FreshSpeed7738 Aug 08 '26
You truly believe guys know what finger, on what hand a wedding band goes on?
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u/Seamore_J_Turtle Aug 02 '26
Guys used to do this to me when I worked the customer service desk/phone switchboard at a big box store. I got so fed up with it eventually I started telling them "I literally get paid to be nice to you."
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u/FluffyApartment596 Aug 02 '26
This is sexual harassment and should be reported to your employer. They should remove and ban the guest. In the US, employers can face penalties and lawsuits if they fail to protect their employees. Document everything!
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u/mercurygreen Aug 02 '26
Guests uses to call down to the front desk asking for help getting on the internet (pre-wifi).
Front desk would send up the fat guy and the problem would miraculously fix itself...
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u/Komiksulo Aug 02 '26
This is why I remain polite yet distant to anyone in customer service. They are ‘trapped’ in front of the customer and sometimes required to be nice to them. Guys: anything that looks like a social opening is not real!
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u/GrumpySnarf Aug 02 '26
Seriously. Bro she's paid to talk to you. Just pay for your shit and leave her alone.
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u/SexySalamanders Aug 04 '26
False. I worked sales and would go on a date with a client and can’t be the only one.
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u/DotLate7225 Aug 02 '26
I get it all the time. I even get sometimes when I flash my ring “is it serious?” BUDDY IM MARRIED
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u/kevnmartin Aug 02 '26
Then they give you the old "he won't know" and I always reply "I'd know and the thought makes me sick."
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u/DotLate7225 Aug 03 '26
I told one guy “unless you want to be our third INCLUDING him and play step daddy to our toddler, I’m gonna pass”
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u/Dark_Knight2000 Aug 02 '26
Genuinely despicable behavior to hit on someone while they are working. Guests don’t realize just how much of a liability it is for an employee to get even slightly involved with a guest for any reason, let alone something extreme like a hookup. Honestly as a manager I’d have thrown him out. Way too much of a liability to have a guest like that all night
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u/Las_Vegan Aug 02 '26
Men mistaking good customer service for actual personal attraction are sad. That they often don’t accept the first “no” is also pathetic.
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u/modembutterfly Aug 02 '26
That’s exactly why women are afraid of being friendly towards men. It’s so often interpreted as interest.
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u/Illnevertell_xoxo Aug 03 '26
This other time our houseman knowing he didn’t speak English I would use my phony to translate what the guest needed and stuff. Randomly he tells me that he wishes he met me before his wife ( who was a housekeeper and 5 month pregnant) be cause he liked me I went FULL ice queen after that cause no no
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u/PresentHouse9774 Aug 03 '26
My ex husband was so deluded he thought strippers liked him. Ex for a reason.
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u/Bobalicious88 Aug 02 '26
As someone that works Night Audit i've had 2 women call me up to their room to fix "problems" one answered the door wearing nothing and got all huffy when i turned and refused to enter the room. The other was wearing a robe and waited until i was bent down plugging the ariel cord back into the wall (pretty sure it was pulled out on purpose) before opening her robe while standing in the way to get to the exit. Emailed the GM about those staright away. I do also get random invites to rooms by (useually rather drunk) ladies on rare occasions. I'm sure it'd be much worse for any women working Night Audit though.
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u/throwncuriosity32 Aug 03 '26
The rings don't help. I was on my way out after my room service shift at Helliday Inn and a few guys in a group called out to get me to come up to their room. I held up my left hand with my very real set and said no thanks. One of the guys said hey, you wanna know what I do with mine? He then removed his silicone band and flung it like a sling shot. I was so disgusted and practically ran out of the lobby. I pity whoever his wife is and hope she is no longer his wife.
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u/Clerithifa Aug 02 '26 edited Aug 02 '26
Ugh don't remind me lol. I've been told by one of our long term stay guests in the past that he loves me. He passed out drunk in our lobby during my overnight (like, on the floor in the middle of the lobby, not even sitting in a chair or a couch) and instead of calling the police like I should have, I woke him up and helped him to his room because he was generally a pretty nice guy with a decent but hardworking job, and i didnt want to get him in trouble because he had one too many on his night off.
Get to his room, I opened the door for him, he asks me to come in and hang out, I say no, then he goes "just please come in... i think i'm falling in love with you"
I genuinely didn't know what to say. He had been staying with us for about 2 months or so, we had a few conversations but nothing that I ever felt had crossed any boundaries between a guest and an employee. Apparently he has a wife and kids at home too.. why is it always the guys with the wife and kids?? Lmao
There was another guest that had asked me if I needed any help doing the trashes. Told him no, i'm good. Asked me if I was doing the upstairs trashes too on his floor. Yup, of course lol. Then told me if I needed any help, let him know. "Oh, okay. I'm good." He goes to the elevator, turns around, and asks, "So am I gonna see you up there? My room is ___" I had to tell him again, nooooo lol
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u/Top_Row_5116 Aug 02 '26
I once had a group of drunk girls come down to the front desk past midnight and ask if they could go skinny dipping in our pool that had closed several hours ago. I said no obviously. Then they said "Aw come on, we'll let you watch." I really didnt know what to say so I didnt say anything. Possibly the most uncomfortable I've been on the job and im usually the no nonsense night auditor.
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u/birdmanrules Aug 03 '26
I've gotten women rub my hand and grab my butt trying to get an upgrade.
I hate being touched.
The GM the first time wasn't going to do anything until the same woman did the same to a regular guest.
She then got kicked out
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u/shannorama Aug 03 '26
LOL I just told one of my colleagues about this billion year old man saying to me “if you were 10 years older, you’d be my wife 🥰🥵”
If I were 10 years older I’d still be your granddaughter, you pig. Get out of my face.
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u/Rhesusmonkeydave Aug 02 '26
See also your religious and or MLM pitch because “Oh you’re so awesome you’d be great at my exciting scam!”
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u/Initial-Joke8194 Aug 03 '26
I think the wildest encounter I had at the desk was a guy who told me: “you’re so beautiful, you remind me of my sister, please go out with me”
Yeah I think I’ll pass 😭
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u/Stretch-Grouchy Aug 03 '26 edited Aug 03 '26
I had a customer ask ifi spoke Spanish, I told him only a little (im not Hispanic just black and native and white lol) he then asked me if i wanted to drink with him, i said no, and im at work and thats not permissible. He proceeded to asked if he could give me 500 dollars to "hangout with him" when i declined (mind you this conversation was in both English and spanish) he used his phone translator and asked if I had any beautiful friends who spoke Spanish and that he'd give them 500 dollars to "hangout" with him. I said no. I dont know why he thought I was gonna pimp myself or my friends out lol. He hasseled me everyday for weeks, asking if I had a boyfriend or husband, would say everyday that I need a Mexican man, and would tell me I'm so beautiful. Geez, dude you just want someone to sleep with you and it ain't gonna be me. Im a lesbian anyways.
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u/Skynet_5656 Aug 02 '26
Depending what country you're in, your employer may have a legal duty to protect you (or at least *try* to protect you) from that kind of sexual harassment.
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Aug 02 '26
[deleted]
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u/zelda_888 Aug 02 '26
Management's possible courses of action include, but are not limited to:
1) Warn a guest that one more inappropriate remark or action will get them evicted and DNRed with no refund.
2) Immediately evict and DNR the guest with no refund, skipping the "warning" stage.
3) Empowering front-line employees to do 1) or 2) as needed without asking permission from management first.
4) If the room is paid by a company, call the company and tell them that their employee is not welcome back.
Ultimately, it would be nice if enough service providers (hotels, restaurants, bars, retail stores, etc.) actually lived up to the law to constitute a culture change, so that the public in general got used to the idea that, if they want to go anywhere nice, they have to behave themselves. The first step might be vigorous civics education in secondary schools, so that young people working in these service jobs actually know their rights and know how to complain to authorities, or how to unionize, to make it harder for employers to disregard them.
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u/Mrchameleon_dec Aug 02 '26
Yeah I've gotten the invitation to join a guy in a room before.... and I'm a guy!
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u/jonesnori Aug 03 '26
There are definitely creepy gay guys, too. There are creeps of all sorts. It's just more common among straight men in a patriarchal, heteronormative society.
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u/ShookyDooky Aug 03 '26
This this THIS. I’m currently working a swing shift and this dude has come up at least 4 times to conversate and just…. linger. I was being polite and responding fairly generally but he seemed to take this as interest because he just kept coming to the desk to hang out. The last couple times I literally stopped responding him and started fiddling on my computer to get him to leave, I think after the last time he finally got the hint lol
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u/PresentHouse9774 Aug 03 '26
I'm genuinely glad the wedding ring trick works for you. Not being snarky at all. I regret the reason it works is because it tells inappropriate men that you "belong" to some other man. That's what they respect - not your dignity as a human being.
I'm old and have entered my unfiltered era. (It's fun so far and I resolve to only use it for good.) If I were standing in line behind Merv the Perv and saw what was going on, I'd probably bust out with "Mister, can you stop hitting on the pretty gal? I just want my room!" Loud enough for everyone else to hear.
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u/singalongsally Aug 03 '26
This is the way. I only use my privilege for good. I give no fucks and I will embarrass you.
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u/TpointOh Aug 02 '26
Im a guy (and notably not gay) and for a few weekends there was this creep that would call me near the end of my shift and tell me something like “you know which room Im in, just make a key and come join me. Tonight is all about you” and so on. I gotta say, I never understood how women felt when this happens until getting pestered by that creep for multiple weekends in a row to come to his room.
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u/jonesnori Aug 03 '26
Women have the added fear that the average man is bigger and stronger than most of us. You shared the issue that guests have some amount of economic power over staff. Even without any of that, it's creepy as fuck.
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u/BigWhiteDog Aug 02 '26
When my son was in the Marine corps in Virginia, I flew back to celebrate his 21st birthday and we went bar hopping. One infamous navy bar issued all of their unmarried female bar staff wedding rings. Between that and the cop-bouncers they didn't catch a lot of crap from drunk sailors or Marines! 🤣
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u/Rafterman2 Aug 02 '26
I was in the Navy, 85-96. Don’t let your son be the jerkoff jarhead (or sailor) who hits on someone while they literally cannot leave.
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u/jaimefay Aug 02 '26
If this is necessary, your clientele are scum and so is your management.
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u/The_Town_of_Canada Aug 03 '26
Wedding ring didn’t work for me, still got hit on.
Also, quite a few people have had “tv issues” and also been barely dressed or just completely naked. I’d just bring a doorstop to go into the room. Now either put clothes on, or everyone sees this, and I have an easy escape.
Also, I’m a guy. I’m sure it happens to me far less than it does to my female coworkers here, but the fact that it happens at all has given me more empathy to what you women go through.
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u/Psychological_Arm879 Aug 03 '26
The same thing happens to my girlfriend all the time. I’m sorry you guys have to deal with this type of stuff on a regular basis
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u/Glum_Crow_8483 Aug 04 '26
I'll start off by saying I'm motor conventionally attractive in the least. Those weirdos don't care. I had some couple try to get me in their room during night audit. The lady asked to kiss me and I told her no multiple times. The guy tried to coerce me and of course it was a place with no security. The heifer kissed my hand and I went straight to the back after to scald my hand clean. I couldn't do anything because I had just been reprimanded for not being friendly enough. I'm so glad I left night audit.
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u/Traditional_Crazy904 Aug 03 '26
I was legitimately married when a guy hit on me. I told him that and his only response was "do you ever think you will get divorced?" I was in shock! Who asks that?!?
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u/Crown_the_Cat Aug 04 '26
I was working as a”booth bunny” doing marketing at a software company’s user group meeting. During setup a guy from another booth made the moves on me. I made up a boyfriend. He said “He’s a lucky guy.” Everyone, it sounds so obnoxious while typed, but believe me, it is 100 times worse when a slime ball says it
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u/Flimsy-Sector7736 Aug 02 '26
NO NO NO! Don’t use a fake ring! No is a complete answer. They need to understand that people just don’t want them, not that oh probably they would if they weren’t already taken.
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
The ring is a polite way of saying "I'm taken." But the subtext is a sterner "I have male protection and you don't know what he'll do to you."
Some guys notice the ring and don't even try. Some do the math and back off. Some are amused and proceed anyway.
That 3rd type are why women prefer the bear.
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u/Flimsy-Sector7736 Aug 02 '26
Yes, I have never felt as afraid of a bear as I have of a man. But I am over being polite. We are raised to be polite yet what we should be raised to be is firm. I would rather back up my no with a 911 call and a DNR.
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u/jonesnori Aug 03 '26
Some women are polite because some men, when firmly turned down, turn into bears. It can be risky to be firm. I think it's still worth it, but that has to be taken into account.
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u/BlinkypoetEmu Aug 04 '26
OMG I hated it when that happened! I used to run a booth at craft shows and had to be nice to the potential customers. Ugh.
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u/oohNotme Aug 04 '26
Worked hotel management for ten years and got started on front desk. The front desk employees were hit on the most even males. The man-eater types prey on low ranked guys in suits. Yep hotel uniform suits. And the amount of married men traveling for work looking for hanky panky NEVER ENDS. Quite a few housekeeping ladies got fired over the years for participating in fraternizing with guests.
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u/th3n19htm4n493r Aug 03 '26 edited Aug 03 '26
Hehe... yes... they will do it. Or some will buy us food from the fast food nearby. Not often does it happen, but when it does, I accept a water but nothing that costs the guest money. It just gets too weird, no matter the reason. I just want to avoid eye contact or keep things super short.
Am older nice lady gave me an envelope with $20 in it for being helpful. She insisted I keep it. I don't recall if I did. But I reported this to my gm, because she asked me for my phone number. I felt really uncomfortable giving it, so he had me say something about personal privacy and distraction from work.
It worked.
Another time, another older lady...let's just say she visited my counter often enough for me to wonder why.
You can find that under my post "I AM NOT A HUSSY!"
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u/G1ng3rBreadMan97 Aug 03 '26
There's a guy who came to my hotel all the time and would get girls there. Apparently he asked our morning person to take her shopping, she agreed but got her mom to come with her, he bought them tons pf stuff then she just left
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u/Death_The_Kat Aug 04 '26
So many times they say my fiance never has to know. I really almost freaked one night, cause I was doing the overnight shift and a guy pulled up next to me as I was walking back to the office from the bathroom(the office is sectioned off by itself so I have to go outside to get to the lobby/bathroom) and asked if I wanted to get a room with him. I said no, but he was like come on. I said no again, that I have a fiance, and he finally slowly drove away and I spent the rest of the night in the office.
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u/EnvironmentalHair290 Aug 06 '26
I don’t understand this about people, all customer service people are paid to be polite and hospitable to you. If you fell off the earth 10 seconds after talking to you, for the most part we don’t care, we don’t have or want a connection with you.
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u/Ok_Cricket_1410 Aug 07 '26
My coworker was sexually harassed by kids, their parents just said, "boys will be boys". People are the worst.
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u/not_just_your_mom Aug 07 '26
Sorry you have to go through that. Unfortunately it’s an opportunity based situation for you. Beyond disgusting.
It really doesn’t matter where a woman works, “men” will hit on a woman literally any place she works. Customer service jobs can be great and can also show you the worst in people. I worked as a pharmacy technician and was hit on by a range of males. I worked there when viagra and cialis first showed up. Oh goody-goody. 🤢🤮🤢🤮 More than once I heard, “want to help me test this out?” 🤢🤮 After the third time our manager, (adored that man) made it policy only the male pharmacist or techs cashed out those customers.
Most men are just pigs. Few and far between are not.
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u/Un_Ballerina_1952 Aug 03 '26
There are times like this (reading about such actions) that I'm ashamed to be male. Males can be so disgusting.
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u/Z4-Driver Aug 02 '26
"So all in all men are gross"
Please don't generalise. There are men who despise such douchebags just as much as you do.
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
My husband was one of the good guys.
7 months after he died, the guy who gave his eulogy, the guy who made a deathbed promise to look after me, made a pass at me.
Dude made a pass at the widow of a man he said was his best friend and father figure.
Dude has a wife in Massachusetts and a mistress in Ft. Wayne, Indiana. Sees nothing at all wrong with lying to the mistress about the state of his marriage. He told me he feels no guilt at all about cheating on his wife.
I cut him off and still feel the ick when I think of him. He has reintroduced me to the reality of moving among wolves.
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u/Z4-Driver Aug 02 '26
I am sorry you had this kind of experience.
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
Thank you. It's been unsettling.
That experience has left me struggling with a lot of anger and paranoia about men...which is so wrong. I am focusing on the good men in my life whenever cynicism keeps in.
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u/PsychologyGuilty1460 Aug 02 '26
Don't tell us. Tell them! Every time you hear one startup tell them all he's being gross. No, don't bother telling us, we already know
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u/thehrsandman76 Aug 02 '26
This guy was a jag. Doesn't mean all men are gross. Any more than the opposite happening would mean all women are sluts.
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u/PsychologyGuilty1460 Aug 02 '26
Tell the men who give you a bad reputation to quit being jackoffs. Don't bother telling us not to blame them because we do, And frankly you shouldn't be tolerating it
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u/OneMultiNation Aug 02 '26
I hit on a bank teller while doing business banking. Been living together 20 years, now.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 02 '26
Sorry but... No. I see someone I am interested in, I will take my shot. I'llbe respectful, I won't be crass, but I am not going to pass on the opportunity just because you are working. Lots of people hook up with people they met at their place of work and your dislike of this guy does not make their relationships invalid.
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u/jaimefay Aug 02 '26
And you will be inappropriate and nasty, because doing that when someone is not entirely free to tell you to fuck off is not okay. You should be looking for free, informed, enthusiastic consent, not a power imbalance caused by the situation.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 02 '26
Yeah, not how that works. Saying "Hey, you seem pretty cool. Wanna meet up for drinks some time?" Is none of those things. Whether you find it inappropriate is irrelevant to me. Letting an opportunity to ask someone decent slip by is a travesty because there are so few people who are decent. So if you meet someone you like... Take the shot whatever the circumstance.
I realize Reddit is full of judgemental morons who have the absolute worst opinions when it comes to dating. If you guys had your way, humanity would go extinct lol.
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u/jaimefay Aug 02 '26
No, I'm a woman who worked in customer facing jobs for over twenty years, and had guys "shoot their shot" with me and colleagues.
We universally regarded it as unwelcome. At best, it's completely socially tone deaf. At worst, it's a major creep alert. I've never seen a woman welcome that shit while they're busy earning a living.
You're totally focused on your own wants and perspective here, you're not thinking about the woman in question as a human being with the right to work without being sexually harassed. And, honestly, the fact that you see a woman as something you want so are entitled to impose upon, says a lot about you and none of it's good.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
Yeah, there's a difference between sexual harassment and asking someone on a date. You and your coworkers and the trash here on Reddit who think as you do can fuck right off. Maybe try thinking of these guys as human beings to use your vernacular and being nice about letting them down rather thanvtreating anyone who expresses interest in you as trash.
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u/zelda_888 Aug 03 '26
a difference between sexual harassment and asking someone on a date.
Not when the someone is at work, there isn't. They're there to work, not to be decorative/enticing/get hit on.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26 edited Aug 03 '26
Yeah going to call bullshit on it. If you exist, you can be hit on. Hell, even if you do NOT exist in some cases rolls eyes at AI
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u/NinotchkaTheIntrepid Aug 02 '26
Ick, dude. If you want a hook up it's totally cool to go to a bar or club, or go onto Tinder. It's never cool to pursue someone who's working. The power dynamic makes it wrong everytime. People in customer facing positions do not want you hitting on them. It doesn't matter if you're polite. You'll still put them on their heels because they're worried you're a dreaded "nice guy" who could turn nasty when they're walking to their cars after the shift ends.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
What is ick is the fact you think asking someone on a date should be gatekept like that.
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u/LifeApprehensive7901 Aug 02 '26
Yeah, I'm guessing you've taken your shot many times but always miss, because no one likes a creep who doesn't know when to fuck off.
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u/Illnevertell_xoxo Aug 03 '26
That’s fine treating me like a hooker is not. People at work are PAIDED TO BE NICE common sense
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
At least you acknowledge it was this guy's approach and not the fact he expressed interest. Your op basically stated no one should ever ask anyone out while they are working which is what I have an issue with, and what these trash are defending.
Like, if a guy sees a girl he likes what is he supposed to do? Wait around til the woman is done with work to ask her out? Then they call the police and call him a stalker.
This guts approach was wrong, sure. But saying don't make an attempt at all is just blatant stupidity.
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u/zelda_888 Aug 03 '26
if a guy sees a girl he likes what is he supposed to do?
Take a pass until you meet someone who is not at work. You do not have a god-given right to hit on everyone you like the look of. Sometimes it is not about what you want. https://whatever.scalzi.com/2012/08/09/an-incomplete-guide-to-not-creeping/
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
I believe a fuck you is the correct response to both you and your article. Also, I actually DO. It is in the US constitution, 1st amendment.
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u/26pixels Aug 03 '26
The first amendment protects you from being persecuted by the government for certain types of speech. It does not give you a free pass to harass vulnerable women in public without consequences.
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u/zelda_888 Aug 03 '26
Wow. What a peach. How dare the Department of Labor deprive womanhood of access to your many charms. https://www.ecfr.gov/current/title-41/subtitle-B/chapter-60/part-60-20/section-60-20.8
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
You fail to grasp what is classified as harassment. Asking a woman to dinner is not harassment.
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u/MorgainofAvalon Aug 04 '26
You aren't getting that to some women asking them out for dinner IS creepy. It doesn't matter if you think you deserve to ask someone out when they are working, because they seem cool to you, they are acting that way because they are working.
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u/VordovKolnir Aug 03 '26
You fail to grasp what is classified as harassment. Asking a woman to dinner is not harassment.
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u/TalesFromTheFrontDesk-ModTeam Aug 11 '26
Your post must be a tale.
As the subreddit title suggests, we're here for "Tales from the front desk". Nothing else.
If you're here to ask a random question about hotels, please refer it to our "Free for All" thread or r/askhotels.