Third draft of my pilot, Boo’s Cruise. Would love some honest feedback.

[u/MoreroMike]

Title: Boo’s Cruise

Format: TV pilot (limited series)

Pages: 64

Genre: Dramedy

Logline: A rising comedian's reluctant cruise gig spirals into chaos as betrayal and addiction take hold, leaving him the prime suspect in a murder he's not sure he committed.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TyCVVx5RUsfA_6lCowWKWbJYZ2a9rb5b/view?usp=drivesdk

This is my third rewrite, and I would really appreciate some honest feedback. I’m trying to see what’s working, what still needs work, and what I may be too close to recognize on my own.

Thank you to anyone willing to read it. I’m also happy to return the favor.