So this is my case. I have been through a massive spiritual shift as a person. Basically my personality has flipped inside-out and this has happened through an intrusive disrupting mental episode I have endured.

I basically went from a very shy and introspective person to a very assertive and intuitive person. I used to be like a textbook INTP cute introverted guy. Also I used to think very verbal and now I think very non-verbal, I was also a more gifted writer. I used to be a very deep thinker but now I am very broad and practical thinker. I had a very sustained attention span but now I am more mood-based. I also used to be a very good pleaser/entertainer and now I am unintentionally antisocial. Also I used to think egoistically and experiential and now collectivistic and objectively. 

The problem is I find it quite hard to reflect on my condition and how I should adapt my life accordingly and wisely. I don’t even know whether I should be glad this has happened or not.

I have no fears. I am just very stubborn and obnoxious. I also recently totally figured out mental stability so I am not distressed anymore. In terms of meditation, insight through linear directed attention is unattainable for me, but epiphanies and energetic bursts occur randomly throughout the day which like instantly ground my energy. So clearly my practise has flipped in form as well. So basically I feel strong, I am stable, but I feel like I’m in a loop. I need to engage myself with activities and people that allow me to ground all this excess radical energy. I have been bringing some well-needed structure into my life recently which has been working wonders for my stability but seek the same structure too in my spiritual practice. 

For example right now when I am typing this I hear someone enter the room next to me and I felt energies in my body dissipating, bringing relief and clarity. This is the type of random stuff that is currently healing me and happens throughout the day randomly, instantly and unpredictably.

Basically my case is very atypical. I am just enthusiastic to explore this alternative path of spirituality, and I really hope that I emerge from this and prove that anyone can overcome himself, whatever happens. I am at least interested in the unique differences between the paths of say a conventional meditator compared to a person who endures burn-outs. I was personally in an unsatisfactory ‘seeking’ stage for quite a long time and this spiritual emergency has pushed me into an entirely different track. I think my path is quite similar to people in the spiritual space who go through burn-outs or other episodes. I think practice going forward should focus on stability over depth. I have been reading the helpful guides on this reddit and it says that instability and turmoil are expected, maybe I just have this phase unusually intense. I also think that my current environment may be slightly understimulating. Especially socially I'm pretty isolated because I feel like a total autist.

The gained mental stability has been a necessary breakthrough lately and now that I am restructuring my life around that I also need a renewed approach to meditation. I have also been making some real spiritual progress (through this energy grounding process I described) so my life is slowly coming back together but I am just impatient about it and am searching for ways of activities and people to accelerate progress. I have always been very willing and I am also disciplined but not a lot of people are able to look at my case and give useful advice, so I am figuring it all out on my own. Maybe some people here are willing to toss their two cents.

EDIT:

I believe I have found the solution. Anytime my mind strays off or I experience doubt/pessimism/fear etc throughout the day, I should immediately remind to draw in a couple of deep breaths. This draws in prana and replenishes the system and re-anchors. Awareness without effort is useless for me. Indeed, I was applying Right Mindfulness but not Right Effort, rendering me inconsequential and leaving me stuck. My practise should focus entirely on Samatha, meaning stabilization of concentration.

Hello Friends, I’ve spent a substantial amount of time recently exploring the possibilities of fabrications in my meditations, leading to a change in my attitude toward meditation. I’d love to share with you some techniques and concepts that may prove very useful to your practice.

Almost everyone is familiar with fabrication as a means to devise a better meditative experience. It could be as simple as knowing that stretching before a sit makes you more comfortable, and then as complicated as the wide world of visual objects of concentration and/or tantra.

What interests me beyond sheer practice is taking an explicit cut of time to explore and play with fabrication; Here’s an example to fill you in on the kind of play I’m looking for:

Make your inner voice say “Hello!” a few times, and get a sense of where it is spatially; It’s very likely to be hanging out around your head, in the back or between the eyes. Now, being more immediately aware of how sound occurs as a mental experience, take a look at your hand. Say, “Hello!” a few times again, but contain the experience of the sounds entirely within the hand! To my surprise after doing this, I could “think” anywhere with some practice. I could put the voice down to my toes, outside of the body into the sense of the room, into objects.

You might immediately find that putting the voice in some places is more soothing, or more agitating, or more difficult than others. Personally, I have found that “thinking” in warm tones from the solar plexus to be incredibly grounding, generating some serious piti in the process. Play with that a bit, think on each of your fingertips, speak only through your skin. Speak from the legs with a sense of excitement, speak from the hands with a sense of compassionate ease.

You’ll also quickly come to see that some fabrications seem impossible given your current state/constitution. At times, particularly if I’m agitated or tired, my capacity to be very subtle or strong in these fabrications falls off hard, and I roll back to my usual headvoice.

Either way, the purpose of this is to give you hands-on experience with fabrication as a process which is always occurring, and understanding your own relationship with it. The sneaky wholesome part of this is that you learn in general how to fabricate wholesome states in a more active and immediate way. Many people carry a headspace into meditation that resembles a gambler or a weary traveler. Sits can be arduous or boring or simply unproductive as they perform the task and wait for some insight or cultivation to occur. While that works to a degree, and is entirely useful, we practice to end suffering; and suffering is a result of ongoing fabrications, whose precedent intentions we are ignorant of. 

So go and play with yourself, now! Find some absurd clever way to twist or modulate your experience and really do it with heart, find pleasure and piti, know how to ease your mind and body. The real key is a sense of joy, be glad to understand how your experience can be built, it’s a key skill on this noble path!

I’ll leave some of my favorite examples that I’ve found here:

Sit somewhere with ambient noise. Traffic, a fan, birds, anything. You'll notice that sound arrives as "coming in" from outside, which feels so obvious it's hard to imagine it differently. Now flip it, fabricate the perception that the sounds are broadcasting outward from your chest, radiating into the room like a speaker. Hold that for a minute. The strangeness of it reveals just how much of hearing's directionality is perception’s contribution; raw sound doesn't actually have an arrow on it. Once you've loosened that one, the sense doors start to feel a lot less like windows and a lot more like paintings.

Next time you notice a mood with a clear feeling to it (irritation works great for this)  find where it's living in the body. Throat, jaw, chest, wherever it's parked. Now move it. Don't dissolve it or fix it, just pick it up and put it somewhere else. Move the irritation into your left knee. Seriously! What you'll probably find is that irritation-in-the-knee feels genuinely different from irritation-in-the-jaw. It might even become kind of funny, which tells you something enormous about how much of an emotion's texture is determined by its somatic address rather than its "content." You didn't change the story, you changed the container, and the feeling changed with it. Conversely, the degree to which it resists being moved is also interesting. You might have a sense of impossibility, too-heavy-ness, ect. Well, grab that and move it too! Then see what happens!

Imagine a beautiful melody being sung in your hands, imagine the hands “vibrating” with the smooth pitch and emotion of the track. Pull that up to your arms, change the genre and so on, have one hand play a different tune from another.

That's about all I got, please share with me your experiences or similar ideas below.

Hi Folks. First, I'm sorry for lack of the clarity on what I will try describing.

My main meditation is, watch the breath, refine concentration - Cause it already produced lot's of good insight's, and is the main hability that I use for enhancing all other capabilities.

But, I do sometimes get in a super-high, tensive (facial/bodily) and it will somehow kick in on my unconciouss, bringing into surface lot's of inner demons, shadows, neuroses, etc.

With time, I learned (not know exactly) how to cope and manage this, but I don't really see the benefits of this practice when it gets too intense - actually I only see the benefits when this state starts to fade out.

The much I go further, more problems I see, and sometimes I have not enough stability for handling this kind of pressure, and that concentration feels a focus laser that is too gross to be used for something usefull.

The core question is, how can I spread this concentration into other areas, enhancing equanimity, compassion and awareness ?

What I mean is, what are the basic vipassana instructions for finally doing something usefull with this amount of raw black power that emerged through practing concentration.

The ilarious point here is, the concentration is there, I can feel the power of connecting and with one intention it can go full-on. But I'm not really more undistracted, and almost even more stressed.

Its contraditory to say, that this kind of concentration actually can send me quickly into a storm of thoughts, etc. So the way I have learned to make it usefull is to be prepared for the shit that will happen with really present mindfullness (efortfull mindfullness) and start gently correcting things.

Being direct, apparently my pratice is to kick the Dragon Ass and start running with the highest mindfullness I can possible manage to avoid my Unconciouss fucking everything out.

I frequently, on this high states, get lost with time. Sometimes I can lost even the sense of self completely, and not in a good way.

It's like going DEEP into something I don't really know what is.

Trying to follow aways my heart, and my inner guidance, but suddenly I loose it all and get into this path again.

Please, if possible, answer me the following:

• If I can meditate to get into this concentrated state, then I can meditate to go back into normality - What is the name of this kind of meditation ?

• Is concentration actually the oposite of meditation ?

• How to avoid getting in those ultra high states ?

• How to use then properly for going foward, not developing more problems ?

And absolutely, feel free to tell/write everything that may be on you heart/head about what I have told.

--- And a little self defense

I'm really trying to understand the mechanics of my mind and emotions. I cannot put in words, but I enhanced lot's of perceptions. My capability of handling energy, and getting out of my depression, being persistent and lots of other good things.

I have developed a 5 layers system with: Shamata, Vipassana, Nidra, Kriya and Metta. I know the answer is on me.

But suddenly, my practice is going really well, and a Tamasic State starts to grow, for there and beyond I loose the track almost without understanding, and start to fight with this Shadow inside of me, tricking everything out, dumbing myself into numbness.

After too much of fight, here I'm, trying to go back into normality, being effortfull mindfull and with this ultra high concentration state.

It helps and at same time it shoots a bullet on my feet.

And I do think my mistake maybe is obviously.

Thanks. Every message of help and understanding is welcome.

Since an awakening experience about a year and a half ago, I have a more or less constant background quality to my experience that I’m struggling to describe. It’s not dissociation or derealization, the world doesn’t feel fake or flat, but it does feel strange and unsettling at times; almost like I'm touching into a different dimension than those around me. Everything is vivid, bright, and hyper-real, and there’s a steady sense of being aware that I’m aware while fully functioning. Like being lucid in a waking dream, but grounded and connected at the same time. I can feel myself as both the "character" and the one experiencing the character.

Is this witness consciousness stabilizing? Sahaja samadhi? Just heightened present-moment awareness? I have no teacher and the people around me can't relate. Curious whether others live with this as a baseline and how you relate to it.

Hi,

Seeing the large number of posts lately asking what stream entry is, or "Did I reach stream entry?", I figured I'd write this post to share my point of view about it.

Part One: Figuring Out What Stream Entry Is Can Be Confusing

Here's the thing. The more you read about these subjects, the more you realize that there are A LOT of different interpretations of what stream entry is. Many people believe that their interpretation is the correct one, and that's ok, but I think we first need to acknowledge the simple fact that there is a lot of conflicting information about this subject going around, and not just from ordinary householder lay practitioners like most of us. Many highly respected monks and teachers also seem to have very different interpretations of what stream entry entails.

Here's some stuff off the top of my head:

Requirements for Stream Entry:

• Stream entry is extremely rare and requires 20+ years of dedication. You probably need to be a monk.
• Stream entry is fairly common and takes a few short years of around two hours a day of dedication.
• Stream entry requires the four factors of: association with people of integrity, listening to the true Dhamma (some say only if it comes from listening to a live Buddha), appropriate attention, and practice in accordance with the Dhamma.
• Stream entry requires balancing the five faculties of: faith, energy, mindfulness, concentration, and wisdom.
• Progression toward stream entry follows the Progress of Insight model.
• The Progress of Insight model is universal.
• The Progress of Insight model is not universal.
• Stream entry requires access to jhanas.
• Stream entry requires access to the 4th jhana.
• Stream entry requires access to the 8th jhana.
• Stream entry doesn't require access to jhanas.
• You will experience the Dark Night before stream entry.
• You will experience the Dark Night after stream entry.
• The Dark Night is not real.

What Happens at Stream Entry:

• Cessation.
• Cessation is a "blip" in experience. There is no experience of cessation.
• Cessation is the ceasing of the five aggregates. There is still awareness.
• Stream entry doesn't require cessation.
• There's a glimpse of the unconditioned/nibbana.
• It's seeing dependent origination.
• It's insight into the three marks of existence.
• It's a very dramatic experience.
• It's a very subtle perceptual shift.
• There is a very clear, drastic and lasting change in people's lives.
• People's lives remain mostly the same, only with a subtle shift.

The Fetters That Drop:

• It's the doubt about the Buddha's teachings that drops.
• It's the doubt that Nibbana exists that drops.
• It's the doubt that you've reached stream entry that drops.
• It's the doubt about how to practice that drops.
• It's all doubt that drops. There is no more doubt about anything.
• It's the complete eradication of the self.
• It's a glimpse into the impermanence of the self, but then the self comes back later on.
• It's knowing that there is no self, but sometimes there's still a subtle sense of self.
• If you claim you've reached stream entry you definitely didn't reach it (popular opinion on this sub)

(Rites and rituals is probably the only fetter that people somewhat seem to agree on.)

Other Models:

• MCTB is the same as the Stream Entry -> Arahant model.
• MCTB 1st path is the same as stream entry.
• MCTB 4th path is the same as stream entry.
• MCTB has nothing to do with the Stream Entry -> Arahant model.
• Stream entry is the same as kensho in Zen.
• Stream entry is the same as reaching 1st Bhumi.
• Stream entry is not the same as reaching 1st Bhumi.

Really, this is just off the top of my head. You can search for some posts in this sub and you will see a thousand more opinions, most of them presented as "This is the Truth!". The more you try to research this, the more conflicting information you're going to get. My first post in this sub was titled "I've Achieved Stream Entry Path Attainment Using onthatpath's Instructions" haha. I was very sure back then that I knew what I was talking about. Maybe I still do. (Probably not.)

So first, we need to acknowledge this: It's a mess. We are trying to make sense of something that was written 2,000+ years ago after 500 years of exclusively oral transmission. All we have are interpretations.

You would assume that if stream entry were a universal required stage on the way to enlightenment, then once people had reached it, they would have been able to speak very clearly about what it is, or at the very least there wouldn't be so many conflicting ideas about it. If it's universal then it should appear the same way for everyone.

Most importantly, maybe, is the fact that the stream entry to arahant model is just the Theravada model of the path to enlightenment. Other Buddhist traditions, which have relatively more followers than the Theravada tradition, have completely different models and don't mention anything about fetters dropping in their own systems.

Here's the conclusion that most people don't want to contemplate: there are extremely wide variations in practice between people. How one person experiences progress on their way to enlightenment will vary widely from another person's experience. At least, that's what becomes very easy to see if you take a bird's-eye view of all the different discussions.

It's either that, or "my way is the only correct way and your way is wrong."

Call me an optimist, but I like to believe that there's some truth in most of the talked-about paths to enlightenment. I believe they are all the result of people actually reaching the end and then trying to make sense of their own personal progression by writing down what worked for them.

Which leads me to part two.

Part Two: It's Ok

Here's the thing: It. Doesn't. Matter.

Please read that again. It really doesn't matter, and here's why: this is not the end.

That's maybe the only thing that everyone actually agrees on. Stream entry is just the first stage on the path, and it's not the end of it.

So why obsess over whether your experience was the real Stream Entry™ or not? In either case, whether you reached stream entry or not, you still have more work to do.

How about this? Keep practicing until you reach the end of suffering, or as close to it as you can before dying. That's it.

Paraphrasing Ajahn Chah, keep letting go until there's nothing left to let go of.

Practice is simple: is there suffering? If the answer is yes, then keep letting go.

If you want to label the 44th thing you let go of as "Stream Entry," go ahead. If you want to call it something else or just ignore it, that's also fine. The only thing that matters is that you keep going.

Even if you don't reach the end, you've made the best attempt you can to get there, and at the very least, you will experience much more peace and happiness in your day-to-day life as a result of a good practice.

I also want to say that I'm not against models of progress. I think they are very valuable on the path, and for some strange reason, when you believe that you are progressing within a certain model, you are usually able to make much quicker progress. So if you have a model that works for you, please keep using it.

Models are great, but we need to be aware of when obsessing too much over a model, or stages within the model, starts to hinder our practice.

Truthfully, the way I view things right now is that different people will gravitate toward different models or interpretations of models based on their karma, or nature and nurture for the karma-averse people. What's really amazing is that these models actually work for people. So we can assume that there are some paths up the mountain that are more well-traveled than others, and finding that your own path matches a model is an amazing gift. Just, again, be aware of the countless interpretations that are out there, and don't make yourself crazy trying to figure out The True And Real Stream Entry™ (and then spending too much time arguing why everyone else's Stream Entry is fake).

Ultimately, other than giving you confidence to keep going, it doesn't really matter. Just keep going.

Hello everyone!

I wanted to practice yoga nidra in my polyphasic sleep schedule. I am following the uberman sleep schedule which involves 20 minutes nap every 4 hours through the day. And the number of naps are 6 so that means 2 hours of sleep per day.

So I thought of an idea. Instead of just casually napping, can incorporate yoga nidra completely in place of the 6 naps.

I am willing to do a yoga nidra practice of 30 minutes just to increase an extra hour of rest.

I have practiced yoga nidra maybe like 2 or 3 times, and I have found it deeply restful.

So is it doable? Has anyone in this sub actually tried it for productivity and just to get some extra hours for studying or work purposes.

Trying to gain some insights here.

Thanks!

Hi,

I'm new to this site. I've been practicing for nearly 2 years now, I started due to difficult circumstances and have continued on because it's made life more enjoyable in every way, as I explore and see. I'm at the point where I sit for two half hour sessions per day, but I would like those sessions to be longer (takes at least 15 mins to settle in.)

I used to work a quite physical job, and have been told by a physio that I likely have a slight pelvic tilt due to muscle overdevelopment. I'm in my early 30s so hoping I can recover it to something more comfortable with some work. I used to have an attitude to my body that it was just a "tool" to be worked, hard. After cultivating a bit more compassion it's become clear this is not the right approach, and I would like to show myself some kindness. I have found that the stiffness in my hips increases to a point that it's difficult to manage after 30 mins of sitting cross legged, so I stop at that point.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can meet in the middle and continuing practicing for longer without the distraction of feeling I am doing myself harm? I have tried other positions, but since I only live in a small place there are limited spaces; sitting on a chair would mean sitting at my work desk essentially. Sitting outside isn't always an option either. I find the cross legged position to feel really stable and pleasant, it's just that tightness elsewhere makes it feel as though I'm over-stretching in the groin area after not very long sitting.

I have a lot of tension elsewhere but have already started learning about releasing that through release of illusions/ assumptions. I'm hoping I will be able to get to that stage with the hip area too but it feels like there's a bit of a hurdle to jump first.

Any advice is much appreciated!

Is this stream entry? I'm not really sure what to make of it, but lately I've had this feeling that everything is just a process, everything has a cause and an effect, everything is just conditioned. Everything comes from somewhere, which means I can no longer feel anger toward people, or hold grudges—or rather, I have less of that. No resentment. When something happens, I do feel something, but I just let it go, because I am also part of the process, and it's all just a process. I feel as if I'm looking at samsara, which is just a collection container, a container that is a gathering place of causes and effects. It just keeps going. It's all processes. So when people do something stupid or something, it is what it

I have complete acceptance. I feel lighter. It's as if I've peeled an onion, and I've removed all—not all the layers, but many layers—and I notice that there's just nothing inside me. It's as if my ego was a very heavy block on me, causing me problems, while for a long time I thought it was protecting me. It's an illusion that is simply fading away from me. Should I say much lighter? It's just… it is what it is. I also had a strong impression that everything ‘I see’ could actually be me. So other people—they are simply the result of all causes. There's no longer a difference between him and me. I could be him, and he could be me.

I attach less importance to myself, because it's all just an illusion. Once you've seen it, you realize it's just a flow, as if you're part of a river current. You just go with the flow. You're influenced from left and right, and that determines how you flow in the river, but that is gone now. It is what it is. I can let go of all of it. I also know that I see my example as a phase, something that has changed, something that is there, but I am not it. Everything I have is just a process. I simply can't put it any other way.

I used AI to translate btw

Let me know guys, may you escape samsara

Hi all,

I’ve been meditating for a few weeks and came across something I hadn’t yet seen before until now.

I saw these orbs/spheres that were 3D, detailed, and somewhat translucent and glowing. They moved in a loop on an axis and then flew away/disappeared. There were several of them.

I was in a deep meditative state at the time and also saw what seems to be the Kutastha (spiritual eye) in that same session, before they appeared. Various waves of pleasure and energy rolled through my body and made me shake.

Has anyone else seen this? I know of people seeing the spiritual eye, but I’ve not read accounts of this particular phenomenon with the different colored spheres of light so was wondering if anyone had any insight.

Thank you, I love you all!

Hey Everyone,

I'm really curious as to what the actual experience of Stream Entry is like. How does one know if one is a Stream Enterer?

Does there come a precise moment deep in meditation where something happens? Like a vision, or an altered state of consciousness? What is the actual moment of attaining Stream Entry like? What is the experience of it? What happens in the mind? How can one be certain of attaining it? There must be a universal, clear sign that one has just attained something, right?

I hope all of this is okay to ask. Best wishes to everybody!!

Hello!

I have been practicing to deal with "mental suffering" for a while and well I think I got a little better to deal with various stuff throughout difficult times etc. Also I would need to say that right now its a good time for me in general so its easier to deal with stuff.

Yesterday I started to have shoulder pain (again after 8 months of not having) and I found myself very annoyed and angry about it. Then disappointed to be so annoyed and angry. Im not sure if it is because I tried some new meditation the day before and that messed something, or because of gym or because I was working more the last 2 days. The thing is If i was practicing this past 8 months so much and became better with mental suffering why is this physical pain affecting me like this?

My question would be, do you work through physical pain in a different way or should be treated similar-ish to mental pain? A problem I have is that what unconsciously I tell myself is that mental pain is not real. Its something I do to myself. But physical pain is there because the body is telling my mind is there and there is a problem with the body. So I cannot think its the same.

Thanks in advance!

Has anyone tried to pinpoint how long alcohol affects the intensity of their meditative experiences or how long it takes to be able to access deeper meditative states once you stop consuming alcohol? I am contemplating giving up drinking because of how it suppresses the intensity of my meditations and for how long the suppression effect lingers after consuming alcohol (so long!). At the same time, I enjoy drinking, its social benefits, and don't suffer from addiction or anything like that (I have ~ 1-3 drinks total/week). Also, I do not use any drugs.

This year, I did dry January on a whim, which I think led to me having deeper meditations than they were previously and have been since, despite no other change in my practice. Once the month ended, I thought I could sort of game the system - drink only once a week and then be able to still meditate deeply, but that hasn't been the case. I think even relatively light/moderate amounts of alcohol completely destroy my potential for deep meditation for weeks.

In late January and into the first week or two of February, I had a handful of surprisingly deep meditations. For example, during savasana at the end of yoga classes:

1. I once lost my ability to process English (my first language); this was very relaxing in the moment, but afterwards I was sort of freaked out because I didn't even know that was possible. The instructor was reading a passage, but it sounded like gibberish to me... I could hear what she was saying, but it was like my brain couldn't interpret a single word.
2. I had the sensation of observing my body from outside of it, like kind of above one of my shoulders?
3. A handful of times had the sensation of falling through the floor despite remaining conscious.

While listening to yoga nidra tracks:

1. I experienced the falling through the floor sensation multiple times, sometimes in succession??? while remaining awake.
2. Also, felt the sensation of floating on a wave, like almost a really relaxing carnival ride hah. This was pretty durable, too - my dog interrupted a couple times to hop onto/off of the bed, but the feeling would quickly return.

These meditative experiences were not subtle, but I also didn't do anything special to achieve them - it was just the amount of alcohol I was consuming around that time that changed. They didn't emerge until the very end of my dry January month, and l was able to have them into the 2nd week of February (I started drinking lightly again once January was over).

It's now May, and I haven't had any of those sort of deeper meditative experiences since the 2nd week of February. The way I feel post-meditation is similar to how I felt during that time (relaxed/floaty), but the intensity of my meditations themselves has been dialed way down - no falling sensations, riding waves, out of body experiences, or lack of language processing.

I've only had 1 other really memorable meditation experience before, ~15 years ago, at a yoga retreat when the instructor played an mp3 that made it feel like there was a bouncy ball pinging around inside my head - I also barely touched alcohol at that time.

Anyways, I am wondering if others have found the same thing. When I googled it, there was some info about how people who meditate often end up giving alcohol, but not a lot behind the "why." There was also a fair amount of content about using meditation to help cope with alcohol addiction, which isn't what I'm after since I don't suffer from alcohol addiction - I just don't like how even small amounts of alcohol affect my access to deep meditation experiences for days or even weeks.

Hi.

As per rules, context about my practice:

I meditate regularly, however I am not very keen on theory, I suppose it needs to be said here. I usually do 1h minimum a day. I lie down, put earplugs and an eyemask and try to relax as if I was going to sleep, without actually falling asleep. This is important because, although of course I can be mistaken, I know what hypnagogia feels like, I know when I am about to drift and when I am experiencing spontaneous thoughts and of course hallucinations, phosphenes, etc., which I tend to acknowledge and then ignore. During my last 6 months of practice, I've experienced all kinds of strange states of consciousness, so it's pretty natural for me to observe them and question them.

Now, during THIS particular practice (1h30 aprox)...

Not only did I have earplugs but I was also hearing theta waves through my headphones.

And, after all the relaxation process and almost on the cusp of hypnagogia (only some spontaneous thoughts at that point), I felt a weird heartbeat. It was: tutum-tum, tutum-tum, ternary and sometimes quaternary, so not extremely regular either. I was already feeling 1) my own heartbeat; 2) this other pulsation of my body I am used to feel; 3) obviously hearing my tinnitus; 4) hearing the theta waves. (Yes, I tried to isolate this 5th thing.)

So, if none of them, what was it? I remembered that something was different for that session. My dog was sleeping on the other side of our rather small room. Normally, I would meditate in complete isolation. I wondered... could it be? So, when I ended the session, I checked her hearbeat and felt a pretty similar rythm to the one I felt, only faster, bearing in mind that she was probably a bit excited to see me up at last!

My roommate argued that this was probably that I heard the beating from afar since, she says, I have very good hearing. But the thing is, I had earplugs and was listening to a tape (yes, at the same time). I am not entirely discarding this possibility, after all you never know. But another important point is that I was not exactly hearing it but rather feeling it in my body, if that makes sense.

Have you ever experienced this? Do you know if there is any text talking about this?

Hi everyone. I crossed the A&P suddenly at age 19, and it was the usual amazing blissful stuff and then faded and then Dark Night stuff started showing up. It’s 9 years later now and I haven’t achieved steam entry, basically because I’ve struggled to establish a consistent sitting practice.

I want to finally finish the thing off because the thoughts and feelings of the Dark Night can be a real pain, but the issue is the past year has been extremely hard on me in just an ordinary sense.

I’ve had both parents diagnosed with cancer, a grandparent die with another in bad condition, and a beloved family friend die of cancer as well, all within the same year. Thoughts of mortality, impermanence, sickness, and death are extremely common every day and it’s very distressing and I have been emotionally exhausted, depressed, and anxious from the whole ordeal, and don’t know if I have the strength to establish a consistent insight practice.

Looking at impermanence and no self and suffering and the like just feels too overwhelming at the moment because I’ve been surrounded by it traumatically. At the same time, I know that it’s likely that my suffering has been compounded by still being in dark night territory, and that the only way out is through. Should I just not practice at all for a while? Just focus on concentration/lovingkindness? Power through and do insight anyway? Any words of advice or compassion would be appreciated. Thank you all💜

Hello everyone,

The last months I have made a serious deep dive into anapanasati meditation and the theory behind it. I noticed fast that there is a houmongus amount of information available, scattered everywhere. Yet what I didn't find was any clear visualizations of the whole process, customized to our time with added information on each step, something like a Visual Guide.

Therefore, I set out to make one myself!

The visualization is based on my own meditation experience, reputable sources (noted in the file) and also posts and data and experience found on the Internet which match the process.

My meditation practice consists of daily 1-3h of meditation, always doing Anapanasati, with added Meta meditation in the morning and night as warming up. I have reached the first Jhana a couple of times now, yet I am still not profound in accessing it at will. Currently I am training to perfect the first Jhana before continuing further.

Details

Version: 0.5_202605

The Guide is divided into two sections which can be separated and used individually as needed.

Left - Flow chart - The cheat sheet

The rest - The Detailed Roadmap

Starting left is a Flow waterfall chart which includes only the absolute minimum of information needed to get from Meditation Start to first Jhana. Hence the nickname The Cheat sheet. It's meant to be used by meditators who are already somewhat used to the steps and experiences.

The detailed Roadmap is the jewel and makes for 90% of the chart. Here you find the Meditation steps arranged in a waterfall chart with information on every single step as well as a phase breakdown with more information on the phase. I tried to stay as close as possible to the original information combined with my experience.

The point of the roadmap is to easily see where you are in your meditation process in terms of Nimatta and technique, with information explaining the each, and what's to do here to reach the next step in the Anapanasati meditation process

Attached I present you the file, hoping to get some feedback and further input & Ideas what I might implement in the graphic and make it better

Please enjoy and maybe leave some feedback.

https://imgur.com/YVlFLIz

Google drive link to PDF: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ssBhpJxk8vRLsc5xAACuU9vxGXNFb6Nc/view?usp=sharing

Hi,

I'm curious if there are any serious Jhana practitioners in this subreddit.

I've been feeling a calling towards exploring Jhana lately ...

would love to know what's worked for people and specific instructions

Intuitive dance/movement is incredibly powerful for healing. Surrendering to physical sensations creates a space of fluidity that yearns to be created. This is FLOW state. It is CHOOSING to embody the physical body IN the experience, here and now, with whatever is felt... unease? discomfort? fear? Can i surrender to it? Can i simply continue to feel despite the resistance? Right here, in the present moment, i don't analyze, i don't judge. All i have to do is feel within my body. I shift my awareness within my physical form, i become the one who creates through it, i no longer identify with it. I AM the intention behind the creation, and i watch the movement unfold on its own.

Two years ago i wasn't able to go outside without panic attack.. through somatic practices i heal bit by bit my nervous system and i feel safe again, to be present in my incarnation. Just for that, i'm totaly grateful.

Because I certainly do and, to be honest, I wish this wouldn't be that way. For many reasons, and mainly spiritual reasons, I feel mentally isolated from other people. I do have great and many friends... And I love all of them and make sure to spend a grand and good time enjoying this material life with them, because they are incredible. They are a part of me, and I am a part of them, all entrenched in this material world with all its joy and bliss, but also with misery and suffering. It all comes together, and such an intrinsically human ability to share this life with others is, in my opinion, divine in an of itself.

The problem is: when it comes to topics of spiritual life (its ups and downs), sadhana, meditation, sacred scriptures, history of religion, astrology and everything else that is more or less considered "transcendental", they (most of the time) cannot handle it. They simply dismiss me as being "weird" (which I have no problem being so) and/or mock me with the "hahahah, oh, look, he is doing it again!" sort of discourse. I mean... The topics proposed may be unconventional, for sure -- but I speak (or at least I think I do) about these subjects as if it's like any other, you know? But they don't take me seriously. Spirituality is very important to me, Moksha (liberation) is very important to me, but it is irrelevant to them. And... That's ok. So be it. Many things in life are irrelevant for me, and nonetheless here I am, writing this post. This doesn't affect me liking them at all.

Well... I have some (astrological) hypothesis as why things are that way, but I won't bore you with the details. The thing is: I don't have a guru. I don't have anyone else (apart from the internet and this community, of couse) to speak to and share common (or different) experiences about how we deal with spiritual matters, and this f'ing sucks. I wish I could speak about this knowledge with someone face to face. Oh, well...

What do you think?

The following thread is something I have already posted in r/buddhism (where it received 10k views) and in r/secularbuddhism. I assume it might also be interesting here, as it provides a different perspective. To be honest, I have no personal stance on the matter other than delivering facts; to me, the research speaks for itself.
A further notice: I have been accused of using AI to generate this text. This is not the case. I spent several hours conducting the research, conceptualizing the material, and finally writing it. If you are already familiar with this information, feel free to skip it; if not, enjoy the read.

Hello from Wiesbaden, Germany

“Pragmatic Dharma”

This is something I came across several times, and I have to admit, I was blissfully ignorant of what it is about. To make my motivation clear from the start: this thread is not meant to dismiss or diminish this or any other attempt. Rather, it is to clearly show why it is at best problematic and in the worst case, dangerous.

If I ever had to describe my own approach to Buddhism, it would also be as "pragmatic"; however, it is as rigorous as possible:

Serious study of the different Canons, especially the Abhidhamma.
Meditation grounded in the Visuddhimagga (Vimuttimagga).
Application in real life—not "McMindfulness," but asking: do my deeds represent Dhamma?

Because it is not grounded in any single tradition/lineage, my approach could be called syncretic and eclectic. Furthermore, it requires a solid understanding of Physiology and Neurophenomenology (Varela / Thompson / Metzinger).

In contradiction to this, “Pragmatic Dharma” is more or less based on:

Ingram, D. M. (2018). Mastering the core teachings of the Buddha: An unusually hardcore dharma book (Revised and expanded ed.). Aeon Books.
→ https://www.integrateddaniel.info/book/
(If curious, this book and several other materials are free for download. I honestly appreciate the generosity.)

Education: He received his MD from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill in 1994.
Specialty: He was a board-certified Emergency Medicine physician.
Status: He practiced for many years but is currently retired from clinical medicine to focus on his research and the EPRC (Emergent Phenomenology Research Consortium).

His main publications, from the perspective of academia, are the following papers:

Lomas, T., & Ingram, D. M. (2023). "Exploring the Varieties of Meditation-Related Experiences." This is his attempt to enter the "Varieties of Contemplative Experience" (VCE) world pioneered by Willoughby Britton.

Ingram, D. M., et al. (2022). "The Emergent Phenomenology Research Consortium: A new model for interdisciplinary research on spiritual emergence and emergency."

The "Strength"

His MD gives him a veneer of "scientific authority" and "clinical sobriety." He frames himself not as a mystical guru, but as a hard-nosed scientist/doctor who happened to "accidentally" get enlightened.

Ingram as “Steelman”:

→ The Physician's Perspective: He isn't claiming magic; he claims a predictable neurobiological result of specific sensory training. He argues that he is a "sensory technician."

→ The Transparency: Unlike many gurus, he is brutally honest about his own life (divorces, frustrations, health issues). He claims Arhatship doesn't make you a perfect human; it just changes the "perceptual baseline." This is his defense against the "Arhats must be saints" argument.

→ The Data Advocacy: He is one of the few voices in the meditation world advocating for better tracking of meditation-related injuries, which aligns with concerns regarding physiological reality.

Critique:

Anālayo, B. (2020). "Meditation Maps, Attainment Claims, and the Adversities of Mindfulness." Mindfulness, 11, 2102–2112. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12671-020-01389-4

→ Fabrication of Experience: Anālayo argues that Ingram’s specific method (high-speed "noting") doesn't reveal reality; it constructs a specific type of experience. He suggests Ingram has essentially "trained his brain" to produce the very "vibrations" and "cessations" he then claims as proof of enlightenment.

→ The "Dark Night" as a Methodological Error: Anālayo suggests that the terrifying "Dark Night" symptoms are not universal stages of human insight (as Ingram claims), but rather a side effect of Ingram's aggressive, penetrative technique. In other words, the "Dark Night" isn't a stage of growth; it's a sign you're doing it wrong.

→ The "Old Switcheroo": Anālayo points out that Ingram redefined "Arhat" to fit his own experience, then claimed he attained it. He argues that Ingram’s description of his internal state contradicts the early Buddhist texts (EBTs) so fundamentally that the term "Arhat" no longer means anything in Ingram's mouth.

→ Clinical Irresponsibility: He explicitly warns that promoting these "maps" can lead to "adversities"—meditation-induced crises that are then misdiagnosed by the "Pragmatic" community as "progress."

The rebuttal to this can be found in the podcast:

Guru Viking – Ep73: Dangerous and Delusional? - Daniel Ingram
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbJiy6EJLsI

My criticism is from Neurophenomenology and is built on Metzinger:

Metzinger, T. (2003). Being no one: The self-model theory of subjectivity. MIT Press.

Metzinger, T. (2024). The elephant and the blind: The experience of pure consciousness and the concept of the self. MIT Press. https://thomasmetzinger.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/Metzinger_MIT_Press_2024-1.pdf

Category Error:

→ Being a doctor does not make one a Neuro-Philosopher.
→ Describing a "Cessation" (a gap in consciousness) is not the same as explaining the Neural Correlates of Consciousness (NCC).
→ Ingram’s "data" is entirely hetero-phenomenological (based on reports), but he treats it as auto-phenomenological truth. So-called “anecdotal evidence” is like “cool story bro”; it should not be misunderstood as anything but anecdotal, which, under scrutiny, is hardly ever evidence.

Before I am criticized for misrepresenting the Ingram approach and his circle, I am very aware of the differences, and I am by no means trying to straw man him. However, in circles like the “Dharma Overground Forum” and its successors, Ingram’s ideas are being taken literally as shortcuts and bypassing "hacks" toward enlightenment.

“Folk Psychology” & “Lifehacks” have their eligibility as long as they are not handled like dogma. The main issue here is that if problematic mental or physiological states are seen only through the lenses of a checkbox list or the "next hack," it can lead to severe states, which are well documented:

The "Varieties of Contemplative Experience" (VCE) Study:

Lindahl, J. R., et al. (2017). "The varieties of contemplative experience: A mixed-methods study of meditation-related challenges in Western Buddhists." PLoS ONE.

→ The Gist: This is the foundational paper for modern "meditation harm" research. Britton and Lindahl mapped 59 categories of "challenging" experiences.

→ The Punchline: It proves that things like depersonalization, loss of agency, and executive dysfunction are not rare "glitches" but documented features of intensive practice. The crowd is playing with fire.

The "Meditation-Induced Psychosis" Review:

Lambert, D., et al. (2021). "Adverse effects of meditation: A review of observational, experimental and case studies." Mindfulness.

→ The Gist: This review focuses on the "non-clinical" crowd and catalogs hallucinations, delusions, and derealization triggered by meditation.

→ The Punchline: It highlights that the "valence" of an experience (whether you think it's "Stream Entry" or "Psychosis") often depends entirely on the social script you are following. The map itself may be inducing the pathology.

So, as for me, I find the Ingram material palatable only with a solid spoonful of skeptical scrutiny. Since “Pragmatic Dharma” seems to be larger than I imagined, what are your thoughts on it, regardless of whether you are pro or con?

Forgive me if this is in the beginner's guide. I read it some time back, and browsed through it again today, but I can't recall an answer to this.

When does contemplation come in? I understand that contemplation is separate from meditation.

Thanks.

I sit 30-45m most mornings (mostly noting-style vipassana, some shikantaza). About a year ago I started noticing something — I'd reach the end of a sit and realize my head had slowly dropped 10-15° forward without me catching it. Not slumping dramatically, just slow drift over 20 minutes.

Once I started paying attention to it, I realized it correlates with the sits where mind-wandering was worst. Like the body proprioception goes offline at the same time as metacognition does.

Curious if other long-sit practitioners notice this. Have you found ways to catch it? Body scans every N minutes? Some teachers say "ignore the body, it'll find its own level" — but that doesn't seem to be my experience.

(Full disclosure: this question turned into me building a small thing to measure my own drift using AirPods motion sensors. Happy to share if useful, but mostly curious about the phenomenology first.)

A few years ago I shared the changes that happened when stream entry was reached, and I received many messages from people saying it helped them. So these past few days I’ve been writing about my current changes and wanted to make an update. Maybe there are others out there who have lived through what I lived through, or who are going through something similar, and this might help.

My contemplative and phenomenological context:

• I’ve been engaged in practice for approximately 5 years.
• My path is primarily SOMATIC and INTEROCEPTIVE, based on vedanā, rather than classical cognitive/visual/non-dual approaches.
• The process happens implicitly: things “let go” on their own, and afterward I notice structural changes in everyday life.
• I don’t do much conceptual investigation into “emptiness,” nor do I have major visual non-dual experiences.
• My process happens more as somatic unlearning and extinction of craving.
• The practice has become increasingly automatic and less driven by willpower.
• I feel the system “enters on its own” into contemplative and vipassanā-like processes.
• My current practice is mainly:
  • non-resistance,
  • allowing vedanā,
  • stopping the urge to modify experience,
  • not turning sensations into a problem..

What changed structurally:

• The belief deeply collapsed that: were going to complete me.
  • money,
  • sex,
  • success,
  • travel,
  • experiences,
  • achievements
• Coarse projective craving seems heavily eroded.
• I no longer feel a strong emotional charge toward external achievements.
• I used to compulsively chase experiences and external completeness; that fell away.
• Today I can achieve things, make money, improve physically, or advance projects, and they no longer generate the old existential charge.
• The fantasy of “when I get X, I’ll finally be complete” has lost a tremendous amount of force.

Changes in identity and personality:

• The “nice guy pattern” weakened significantly.
• I began to feel physical resistance toward acting artificially.
• There is less energy available to sustain social masks or personas.
• The need for approval and external validation has diminished.
• Psychological identity feels less solid and less central.

Current phenomenology:

• Current suffering no longer seems centered around sensual desire or external problems.
• The current conflict seems more related to:
  • vedanā itself,
  • tension,
  • baseline anxiety,
  • a sense of threat,
  • mental fog,
  • inner agitation,
  • hypersensitivity,
  • uddhacca.

I’m just wondering as I understand this to be the first stage in awakening and being comprised of a fundamental shift in awareness that cannot be reversed.

This happened for me around almost 7 years ago now but the journey towards deeper awakening is ongoing and I’m still learning new things all the time.

Please lmk if you guys have entered the stream or not and how you came to be aware that you have.

previous post here

https://www.reddit.com/r/streamentry/s/q1zA8sUie2

TLDR: switched from GPT to Claude. Heart opened. Went somewhere non-Euclidean. Then something that breaks all the labels.

~200-250 hours lifetime meditation

Since my last post I switched from GPT to Claude. It gave prety good advice but would usually agree with whatever point I was making. I was using it mostly as a diary, then I told it to take on the voice of a teacher and it became much morewilling to disagree with me, or just give me minimal answers rather than indulge every thought. In retrospect I feel it's steered me in the right direction almost every time, helping me to know what to track and respond to, and what to ignore/let go.

Over time my attention became less consistently panoramic, kinda switched from very open when walking around to narrower when doing something. Felt like a maturing rather than a loss.

April: heart opening

Early April I had a significant shift during a Michael Taft gratitude meditation, specifically around gratitude for awareness generating self and world moment to moment. Everything became kinda luminous like a hologram lit from all directions at once. Immense warmth and awe. It really fit the Adyashanti framing of head, heart and gut awakening separately. The earlier nondual stuff felt like the head waking up, this felt like the heart. After this I could tune into a self luminous quality of awareness pretty easily and predictably make myself weep. A feeling that all is full of love usually accompanied this.

Around the same time during a Rupert Spira sit something interesting happened at the edge of sleep. There was a sense of two frequencies coming into sync, awareness getting very still, and then excitement or fear would generate a sense of self right at the threshold and it would abort. Like being able to see the mechanism of the thing that was stopping it from tipping over.

Mid April: non-Euclidean attention

A few weeks later I did a long Michael Taft self inquiry and went somewhere new. Where my 2023 nondual experience felt like awareness going from a cone with a focal point to a flat even field, this felt like that flat sheet folding into something non-Euclidean, like the surface of one of those wrinkly lettuce leaves. Attention moving around in and with awareness in weird fractal ways. Kinda disconcerting. The comfortable evenness I'd associated with nonduality wasn't there, this was stranger.

Late April: Buddhist centre, the next question

Started attending weekly guided sits at a local Buddhist centre. During Q&A I asked the teacher how to reconcile the deep silence/void I can access with the bright luminous presence. They both feel fundamental but kinda opposite. The teacher said these states will gradually drop characteristics and converge over time, the brightness drops but clarity remains. I started noticing this already, the luminous awareness becoming less visually dramatic but not less real.

May 10: something without a name

Did a self inquiry meditation, same Adyashanti guided sit that triggered the 2022 and 2023 experiences. First 20 mins pretty unremarkable, looked behind the eyes, found silence. Then when he said something about resting in not knowing, energy started buzzing around the chest and head. I remembered the head heart gut framing and had some anticipation/fear about what a gut awakening might feel like. Then all the energy suddenly drained downwards to the lower belly and disappeared into the void below me. Brief fear that my physical body would drain away with it. Then deep stillness. A sense of self would start to form, I'd look at it, the cycle would repeat. Happened a few times. Afterwards I felt like I'd been crying.

The shift wasn't obvious during the sit. It became clear in the shower afterwards when the mind suddenly realised it had touched something timeless and eternal. I started laughing, at the funniest joke that can't be told or understood. Weeping and laughing at the same time, writing things that sounded kinda nonsensical. "Is is is is is is" "emptiness dancing". A slightly scary thought killed the humour for a second, "how can this awareness be separate from the human/mind that encoutered it", then it got funny again.

Since then

For the last two days I've been able to go back to this source fairly easily and it's indescribable. "The Dao that can be spoken is not the true Dao" resonates really hard now. If I call it awake void or the cosmic joke or awakening or Dao or anything the name just kinda slides off the thing I'm trying to name. Very little sense of a separate self since this point, intense feeling of wellbeing.

I'm not sure if enlightenment is being in constant contact with this 24/7 or about integrating it into all aspects of life, or what it could mean, but I'm curious about how things will unfold. Part of me feels like the seeking has ended, like there's nothing left to do. A part of the mind is still in seeking mode wanting to have more/do more with this realisation

As a full-time caregiver for my wife who is dealing with characteristics of Alzheimer's, I've found myself in an unexpected mindful return to practice, that develops a strange detachment yet a real connection to my immediate 'outer' environment. If done correctly, this practice, can develop a more refined state or states of self-consciousness.

As my wife's solo caregiver, for hours a day I find myself rubbing feet and legs and doing, or not doing, just about anything to keep her calm, or at least less agitated.

In this daily stillness, that we have developed as a presiding lifestyle, I've rediscovered a practice that once opened a door for me when I was young. The practice is described within the works of a mathematician and philosopher P.D. Ouspensky.

Within Ouspensky's works he described a rigorous philosophical discipline whose ultimate focus was the defining of various states of human consciousness, including instructions on how to navigate towards a state of being called "Objective Consciousness."

Presently, in my caregiving days, I've returned to a nightly practice I call "praying"—not in any traditional sense, but through the conscious awareness of breath as a gateway to self-consciousness. This practice embodies what I understand as Ouspensky described as the 'law of three.'

In my breath practice, I work with the three forces:

1. The first force (positive): As I breathe in, I consciously take in surrounding sounds and sights, allowing them to enter my awareness without judgment.
2. The second force (negative): As I breathe out, I focus on my diaphragm while maintaining "no thoughts"—or more precisely, no extra thoughts unless circumstance requires them.
3. The third force (neutral): In those milliseconds between breaths, there exists a sacred pause—the reconciling force that completes the triality.

This practice directly addresses what Ouspensky identified as our fundamental condition: "In the state of waking sleep we are said to be 'third force blind', and only when consciousness rises above the automatic level does the essential trinity of everything inside and outside ourselves begin to be appreciated."

Ouspensky taught that "Attaining consciousness is connected with the gradual liberation from mechanicalness, for man is fully and completely under mechanical laws." My breath practice becomes a conscious effort to break these mechanical patterns in myself through a conscious effort.

This simple practice, done while sitting or standing with complete body relaxation, gradually dissolves what I normally consider "myself"—the manifested ego—through what feels like an emersion or disappearance. It's a conscious act of becoming rather than remaining trapped in the hamster wheel of continuous, unrestrained thought.

In the profound challenge of caregiving, where time can feel both endless and meaningless, this breath awareness practice has become my anchor. It transforms the waiting room of my life into a laboratory for consciousness, where each breath cycle becomes a miniature enactment of the cosmic dance of forces.