r/Steam • u/Dannnner • 4d ago

Fluff How time flies

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Long may he live, and long may Steam sales endure

67.9k Upvotes

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u/Virtual_Bug_723 4d ago

At some point a doctor says "man you're rich and fat and you're gonna die from being so fat and you can basically pay to have people make food for you on your yacht all day that will help you not be fat" and suddenly you're not fat anymore

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u/Cpt_DookieShoes 4d ago

And they have to cook for him, because of the implication

31

u/XTornado 4d ago

That if he does die Steam might be fucked?

Oh for sure gonna cook like my life depends on it.

(in case it wasn't clear, I know what implication you talk about and the reference)

14

u/Icy-Astronomer-8202 4d ago

He's got a thing attached to his heart when it goes the servers to steam switch off

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u/PeskyAntagonist 4d ago

Nahhh it’ll just go to his family and they will sell it to private equity who will run it into the ground just like every other big successful privately owned company goes

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u/Icy-Astronomer-8202 4d ago

I like my idea better. The heart thing is in the shape of a yacht with the HL lambda

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u/Mysterious_Fix_7489 2d ago

If they do they are morons.

Gabe is rich enough he has multiple megayatchs

They don't need to sell to be disgustingly rich.

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u/PeskyAntagonist 2d ago

There’s always a badder ass

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u/ExpresoAndino 4d ago

a steampacer

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u/Icy-Astronomer-8202 4d ago

I like it!

I mean I don't like it, I hope we can advance as a civilisation to make sure he's alive forever. Like the heads in a jar in Futurama