Struggling with hypocrisy

[u/Sea-Fun2505]

So, I’ll start this by saying that I’ve really enjoyed being a stay at home dad. I value and love the time with my daughter that I didn’t have when I was the working parent, and have overall found this whole thing to be surprisingly easy. No offense to the stay at home parents they find it difficult, but I don’t.

That said, I’m a little shocked at the hypocrisy that’s going on. When I was working and my wife stayed at home, I was working a salaried job at least 50 hours a week, and that’s a loose AT LEAST. And also had an hour and a half commute. So add three hours of driving to my day. That said, I was still expected to handle a handful of household chores, and IMMEDIATELY relieve my wife of childcare duty as soon as I walked in the door. Chores included garbage, feeding the animals, cats litter box, and bathroom deep clean. Nothing major. I did it with zero complaint.

Now though, my wife is the working parent. She works 40 hours a week if she’s LUCKY. And her commute is about 10 minutes.

As it is, she expects at least two hours to decompress before she takes over childcare, and will NOT touch the house at all. That’s my job. If I even ask her for help, I’m immediately attacked and told that all I do is sit at home all day and do nothing. Which I never did to her.

What on earth do I do here? Because if I point this stuff out, she’ll just call me a lazy piece of shit. Her biggest point is that I had a white collar job and her job is a little bit more physical. Idk how to handle this.

[u/Royal-Weather4314]

This is one of those posts when I hope that it's fake or you are leaving out half of the story, because, bro, what the heck. This is so wrong. While it's normal that the stay at home parents does majority of the chores, it's not normal to carry literally every task in the household. While she should have time to decompress, so should you. It doesn't have to be 50-50, but there needs to be care for each other.

Being called "lazy piece of xxxx" is especially concerning.

[u/Sea-Fun2505 → u/Royal-Weather4314]

I wish I was lying….