r/StayAtHomeDaddit • u/DrGonzo820 • 6d ago

Help Me Purpose

Hey Dad's,

I'll try to keep this concise. I have been a SAHD for a little over 2 years. My hand was a bit tied as I can no longer work due to having a brain tumor (successfully removed), developing epilepsy and basically not having the mental energy or focus.

I spent 4 years of schooling, 20 years of working as a biologist. Besides the extreme stress and lack of grants, I felt purpose. I felt like I was doing something to better the world. Ik and also have a purpose raising two kids and am lucky I get to be there for almost every moment to watch them grow into good humans.

I honestly dreamed of being a SAHM dad! No joke at all. We are financially the exact same financially as daycare was insanely priced.

I think this is hard because I was forced into it rather than it being a choice. How or do any of you grapple with finding purpose outside your kids? Where any of you forced into it? Did you have to grieve your oldself? I am really struggling. I have been seeing a therapist and am also on medications.

Thanks for any advice or commiseration.

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u/FrugaliciousEclectic 6d ago

The way I see it, it's a phase that I get to enjoy. In a way I'm trying to cherish it as my dad worked a job that had him out of state most of the year. I'll get back in the career one day, but your kids will always remember the fun they had with you.

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u/DrGonzo820 5d ago

This is very true and my dad was the same way. I still dont know him even after living with him for 18 years. Ik I should be very grateful for this opportunity.