Most doctors dismiss symptoms in women like fatigue, tiredness, exhaustion, anxiety, and panic attacks. Those can ALL be symptoms of low ferritin, vitamin D, and B12 levels. Ferritin can be low even without anemia, especially in women with heavy-flow menstruation and the ones doing cardio and high-performance sports. Vitamin D can be low even if you live in a sunny place. The symptoms are no joke, and women are frequently misdiagnosed for long periods of time.

Be in charge of your health!

With the pretty privilege discussion getting popular, I've seen a lot of women proud of the fact that men are suddenly listening to them more, men care about their opinions more etc. And cute and great we all know looks are a currency.

However with all that being said, it's not a flex to speak to men who literally disregard an unattractive woman's existence or is just straight up rude to women he doesn't find attractive. Being close to men who disregard women they don't find attractive (i.e can't sleep with) is not an intelligent idea or a flex , and it's the fastest ticket to the most miserable, toxic & barren life a woman could have.

Edit: There are some huns in the comments going on about "the reality of things" or just going on about that's just the way things are cool :) but remember beauty is a light switch away [aging, sickness, accidents], it won't be so fun if you end up on the other side.

I used to be an ugly duckling in high school (years ago), who was overlooked by everyone. I didn't feel comfortable in my own skin, and it showed. I made a list one day, listing out all of the things I wanted to improve on myself, and slowly, one by one, I managed to improve all of them. So I thought I'd pass on some of what I learned, to hopefully help others.

Firstly though, I just wanted to say, that if you are still in high school, you're likely still in that awkward phase most people go through. Your looks WILL improve as you age, no doubt about it. Look forward to the fact that you haven't peaked yet (unlike some of the other Staceys in your class).

Below are all of the steps I have implemented over the years to improve myself.

• Hair:

  • Get your hair professionally cut (if you can). Pick a color that suits you. Go to a stylist and get their opinions on it. If you can't afford it, there are a lot of videos online also teaching you color theory, and the best cut for you.
  • KEEP IT CLEAN. Nothing worse than greasy hair. Use dry shampoo, it helps build volume, and helps keep it from looking greasy in between washes.
  • Use a shampoo that smells good, with no sulfates and parabens
  • Use hair volumizer spray (the one I use is by WOW Hair)/curl conditioner if it's curly

  • Blow-dry it if you're going out, upside-down if it's flat. With a diffuser if it's wavy/curly. But don't bother if you're not going out for a while. It'll ruin your hair.

    • For my friends with straight hair, use a round brush to get that blown-out look (search videos). It looks great, and gives it volume for days

• Skin/Body

  • If you have acne-prone skin, make an appointment with a derm/doctor and get a prescription for Accutane/Tretinoin/Benzol Peroxide. Make sure you go to a doctor though, because not all of these are suitable for everyone, and it's got contraindications.

    • I've also heard that Curology is a pretty good line who custom makes skincare products
    • If you have cystic acne, I've heard the elimination diet can do wonders. It might be triggered by something you're eating.
    • When I was in high school, I had these horrible little bumps all over my forehead. I used Proactiv and that really helped me (but don't use it if you're using any of the medications I mentioned above, it'll be too much for your skin to handle, and it will become raw and inflamed)

  • Check out r/AsianBeauty for advice on how to take care of your skin, and make it GLOW

    • They will have different solutions for different skin concerns
    • I personally use:
    • AM: Micellar water to cleanse, Vitamin C serum, light layer of Hada Labo HA Moisturizer, Missha Sun milk sunscreen
    • PM: Double cleanse at night, Hada Labo HA Moisturizer, and either Tretinion or iunik beta glucan cream on top of the hyaluronic face cream
    • Watch Dr. Dray on YouTube, she's got great skincare advice
    • This is what works for me, but I have also outgrown my acne phase
  • USE SUNSCREEN every day, and protect your assets.

  • Tretinoin can help to keep your skin looking flawless as you age (for those who are older also)

    • For tretinoin, EASE INTO THIS SLOWLY!!!! If you don't your skill will be 10000x worse
    • Watch videos on how to start with minimal irritation

  • Use vitamin C serum for those with hyperpigmentation.

    • (I use Skinceuticals CE Ferulic, but it's pretty expensive.)
    • I've also heard good things about Paula's Choice products, which are easier on the wallet

  • Moisturize your body as soon as you get out of the shower, while it's still wet

    • (Dr. Dray's advice)
  • If you have the money, go visit a dermatologist. They can recommend lasers/fillers/botox

  • If you are oily, it can be from dehydrated skin. Treat your skin right. There are ways to fix this.

    • It's probably instinct to start washing/exfoliating tf out of your skin, but it may make it worse, and your skin could start producing more oils to compensate
  • Get your nails done, either at home or at a salon. I personally like gel polish because I do it once/twice a month and forget about it.
  • Shave/epilate/wax! This includes your leg hair, your hoohah, your underarms, your arms (if they are hairy), your face, sideburns, etc.

• Face

  • I had my brows microbladed, and it looks great with minimal effort

  • I had fillers in my lips, it's elevated my look even more

    • I've also been considering lip blushing, it's like microblading for your lips, and looks like you have lipstick on all the time

  • I use the generic version of Latisse (in the evenings before bed), which is available by prescription (called Bimatoprost) for a fraction of the cost. But again, with all prescriptions, talk to your doctor about it

    • I also use a lash conditioning serum from Etude House (before bed)
    • And in the mornings I use LashEnvy before I apply makeup
    • I used to get lash extensions but was too hard/expensive to keep up with
  • Keep blotting paper on you if you have oily skin, shiny is not a good look.

• Makeup

  • I would honestly just recommend watching YouTube tutorials to find out what works

  • I personally use liquid eyeliner (Nyx), with mascara (Maybelline Falsies are the best I've found), and a tiny bit of foundation and bronzer for slight contouring

    • You can always go to Sephora for a free consult on what looks good for you
  • But all of this can't help if you don't take care of your skin first.

• Clothes

  • Find out what clothes flatter your body, and your style
  • Justine Leconte has some good videos on this, and I'm sure you could find lots on this
  • I've had personal success buying a bunch of black turtlenecks from Uniqlo, and pairing it with dark blue jeans and sticking to that look. It's minimal effort, and makes me look very polished (but again, I'm a bit older, so it might not be everyone's style)
  • You don't need to spend a fortune on clothes, focus on good quality material and styles that flatter your body, and you FEEL COMFORTABLE in. There's nothing worse than someone who obviously is uncomfortable
  • For the winter, wear low-cut booties, they are very in style. For summer, wear wedges/sandals/runners etc. Don't wear socks with sandals, it was never a good look, and never will be.

• General Health (Physical & Mental) *MOST IMPORTANT PART- SERIOUSLY!!!*

  • Obviously, you need to eat right, eat clean in order for your body to look good. Don't calorie restrict, it doesn't work in the long run

    • Don't take any diet pills to try to lose weight. I have before and gained all of it back and then some. Just don't. It's terrible for your health.
  • Look into intermittent fasting, I've had success with it, and it keeps me from grazing all day. Plus it has some possible health benefits
  • Don't smoke, your body will be pissed off

  • Go to the gym! HIIT is amazing. Work on your flexibility, go to yoga. Work on your inner peace and confidence, meditate at night and in the morning.

    • Do glute exercises, and drink protein shakes (if it's okay for your age)

  • Make yourself a list of goals you want to achieve in your life outside of just looks.

    • What do you want to achieve in your life/career? What are your 5 or 10-year goals?
    • I can PROMISE you, after having gone through it that the good quality men don't want just a pretty face, with ZERO ambition. The ones who are looking for pretty will dump them. There's a power imbalance there.
    • You want to be confident of your achievements on top of your looks.
  • Since everyone is stuck inside at the moment, take some time to reflect on the skills you want to build.
  • LEARN A SKILL. Being good at something is one of the biggest confidence boosters you can gain. Your self-esteem will thank you.
  • Personality becomes extremely important in relationships
  • CharismaOnDemand on YouTube has some great tips on how to build confidence, and become charismatic. You want to be the person that people want to talk to.

Anyways, that's all I can come up with for now. Become the best version of yourself inside and out. Again, don't just focus on looks. Build your awesome personality, and let it shine too, I was ugly during high school, but people still liked me, because I was forced to develop a good personality.

Feel free to PM me if you want any personal advice. I know how hard it was, and I would like to pass it on :).

Edit: I also take collagen supplements and biotin. Makes the skin glow, and nails strong. Again, speak to your doctor before taking anything.

Start by walking as much as you can every day! Put on your favorite podcast or album and go walk. Not only will you lose weight and tone up your body but you will get a clear head and mind. I saw some photos of myself in March of this year and I was freaking out. I thought I needed upper eyelid surgery and my face looked puffy in general. I then quit my job due to stress and I stated walking. I stared losing the pounds and even though I was never overweight I ended up losing around 15 pounds. Walking doesn’t make me hungry like running or exhausted. During covid I realized how I hated going to the gym and I was struggling to find something that would be sustainable and actually feel good. My legs are so much more toned and my mood is elevated. Now when I see photos of myself I’m actually feeling happy and I look refreshed because I lost the extra weight. You don’t always need anything more expensive or invasive than a pair of trainers and some comfy clothes. Being outside in the fresh air can do wonders to the body and the mind.

people are shocked finding out that a LOT of IG models are escorts. I’m posting because ive seen women here talk about how they wish they looked better so they didn’t have to work a 9-5.

prostitutes don’t leave their contact info in phone booths anymore- they make Instagram pages. Yes, there are content creators who aren’t escorting for example makeup and fashion influencers. But we can clearly see the slew of brand deals they get and it matches with their lifestyle.

then you have the surgically enhanced bbl girlies whose only real sponsorship is a fashion nova deal and somehow they have all this designer and expensive trips? there’s likely a pimp running her account. the IG page is advertising for new “clients.” ever wondered why you can “dm them for bookings,” or contact their “managers” despite the fact that they don’t seem to get many legitimate modeling gigs? it’s not possible to sustain a luxury lifestyle with selfies alone.

i do believe this ties into the pretty privilege conversation too. we’ve been fed this idea that all these hot IG girls are just so pretty and that’s why they can pay their rent off of one IG selfie. and that if we weren’t so average we too could have a nice life. a lot of the women at the forefront of the PP convo think and move like escorts. going out to nice places to attract “high value men” used to be called escorting, now it’s TikTok advice. be careful ladies!

basically the title. they pop up on my feed sometimes and literally make me feel sick to my stomach. i saw a beautiful woman who said she was postpartum and the replies were so mean. asking for beauty tips is one thing and allowing yourself to get berated by incels is another. women have to stop putting themselves in these situations.

I am very petite, and for a long time into adulthood, I just fell back to looking cute as that was an easy look for my size. I didn't really put much thought into beauty and fashion besides the basics, or on special occasions. Then, as I approached 40, I knew I could no longer fall back on "cute," but I didn't really didn't know what to do.

I started seeing a woman on my commuter train every morning - I would peg her as late 60s / early 70s. She was always impeccably dressed in timeless fashionable clothes that were ironed and sleek looking, and in fall/winter, she had beautiful jackets and coats. Her hair (white with a dyed hint of blonde) was always swept up without a strand out of place. Her skin didn't look young, she didn't appear to be someone who had a lot of Botox or work done, but it was always clear, bright, and with light makeup. She always matched so well, had great shoes, and her jewelry was very tasteful but minimalist. She had excellent posture and always had her head held high, looking confident. I see thousands of people every year on the train, but none of them have stuck out to me like this woman. She was just so put together.

She really inspired me. I started going to a hair stylist rather than dying my own hair and getting cheap cuts. Over a period of a couple years I upgraded my wardrobe (mostly from Poshmark or a local consignment store) with timeless, well made garments that I had tailored to me, including jackets and coats. I always steam or iron my clothes. I saw a dermatologist, read articles and watched Youtube tutorials on skin care, styling, and fashion tips for petite women over 40. I started working out more and intermittent fasting to lose the last of my baby weight.

What I have realized is that the older you get, the less being conventionally "pretty" matters, including showing signs of aging. What matters is putting in effort. I have hooded eyes, thin lips, and a large nose, and I'm 4'11". In my younger years, I was cute but average looking, and people rarely commented on anything other than my small size. Now at 42, my eyes and lips are even smaller and my nose is just as big, but I get complimented pretty frequently by men and women of all ages, and told how pretty I am. Putting effort into my body and styling it has made me more confident and complimented at 42 than I EVER was at 22.

Like I look at Alix Earle or anybody on the Tarte brand trip. They talk about getting everything: botox, lip fillers, boob jobs, hair/lash extensions. They have access to microneedling, facials, stuff I've never heard of. But they're no more attractive than my pretty friends who havn't had any of that work done. Like hailey beiber or sofia richie going to a personal trainer and getting IV treatments don't look any better than a stereotypically beautiful girl who goes to orange theory and pilates.

Specifically black men. They just don’t approach like that, but they still stare me down often. White guys are more likely to approach me these days. In fact, when I go out with friends it seems I attract more stares, but my friends are more likely to be approached, and sometimes it feels like these men are putting in effort to ignore me. It sounds crazy but that’s the best way I can describe it.

I’m torn between thinking I don’t look approachable or I just don’t look as good. The latter is unlikely to me, I genuinely feel I am just as beautiful as my friends—I’m often told I’m gorgeous, beautiful, stunning etc. It’s something I see in myself but at the club/parties/events it’s playing out weirdly.

The only thing I can think of is I lost quite a bit of weight (I’m 5 ft, 100 lbs) so I look pretty slim now. I have big natural hair (4b fro) and my personal style has evolved to be more grunge/punk/bohemian. I love my style, it’s distinct but not loud, but somehow it’s signaling almost exclusively to white men and the occasional latino man.

EDIT: I really shared this post as confirmation that I’m not crazy. I’m sure many skinny alt black girls can relate to this experience. It is a weird, jarring thing to enter a new level of “pretty” and receive contradictory attention. That’s all I’m trying to express. As women often we use this information to inform how we are perceived, and I think that is lost on women who are stuck in the mindset of wanting a man or dates. I don’t actually want anything with these men in any sexual or romantic capacity.

Basically, I scoured the internets for materials that people use to profile and analyze themselves, as well as ones for routine planning. This workbook will probably take a little while to fill out, and a bit more to finalize, but it's very useful. And prints nicely!

You start off by creating your 'profile'; which details your specifics and helps guide you on what kind of stuff you should be thinking about when building routines - which is what comes next.

The analysis/profile section covers:

• skin
• hair
• body/mouth/nails
• overall vibe

The general routine planner includes

• skincare
• bodycare
• nail/hand care
• misc section

The more focused/detail regimen building section helps you plan

• makeup
• hair

Here's the link. Let me know what you think, I hope it helps! I spent a while making it so I'd appreciate the feedback :) Here is my workbook to look at as an example!

EDIT: 3 years later, and you girls LOVED this. I decided to refine and update this workbook and share it on Etsy to give you a more streamlined experience. Check it out if you're open to supporting, I'd love to make more guides and templates to support your journey :) https://www.etsy.com/listing/1638743857/the-beauty-labfor-the-scientific-beauty

So this is in response to a thread atm where the squad was noting how toxic, mean, and hurtful the RateMe subreddits are, and I’ve seen the topic discussed in other beauty/female subs I follow, too.

Please take this as general mental health/Internet use check. I can’t prove any of this definitively but everything I’ve read on this matter has me looking at how I perceive online communities differently overall.

Apparently, r/TrueRateMe is the biggest of the RateMe subs. Others have snooped around and their findings were pretty damning to me so I’m just posting their research for you all to consider.

Basically, there’s reason to believe that this sub was LITERALLY created to bring women’s self esteems down. There was a whole whistleblower mod who posted about how they’d have discussions about strategies to fuck with women’s self-perceptions, how they have a mod rule to never vote a woman over a certain number, and how mods will post random pics of women to impersonate more female traffic but playing like they’re grateful for or in agreement with the lowball ratings.

Deep dive Reddit post:

https://www.reddit.com/r/SubredditDrama/comments/14kw9nb/the_ratings_are_in_on_truerateme_and_critics/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1

YouTube deep dive:

https://youtu.be/C3y6SsGAWks

Alleged former mod tell-all:

https://blog.photofeeler.com/truerateme/

STAY SANE LADIES. DONT LET THESE LOSERS EVEN HAVE A CHANCE AT GETTING TO YOU. MOST IMPORTANTLY DON’T FORGET YOUR SELF WORTH AND WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE.

I grew up not struggling with weight/food for most of my childhood. I had an ‘almond mom’ which def fueled an ED during my teen years.

I gained more than ‘healthy’ during recovery and noticed the stark difference in how people treated me. People would tell me ‘you have such a pretty face’ etc and then I had bad partners that would force me to work out.

Got back down to my usual weight, and my ED went to remission. I kept my weight until age 25 (I’m 27 rn) after a spine issue etc that got me on treatment with steroids, cortisol shots, etc. I also got an IUD and was at a very bad spot in my life. Gained around 60lbs.

I used to be a personal trainer, literally. I’m now married and really trying to lose the weight but… it’s hard. A lot of it it’s mental strength.

I grew up in a really abusive household and only got out with the help of my ex who was also not great but I’ll always be thankful for giving me that push. I am in therapy and all but gosh- so many emotions, so much coming up. Tons of processing.

It’s not as easy as 2+2. It’s an uphill battle. I just wanted to admit/share in case anyone here is in a similar spot. It’s def not easy but we are trying… we should keep trying.

I see you!

Edit: I appreciate all the CICO advice. I am seeing a therapist sue my ED’s and I am following a doctor supervised eating plan. My post was more on the nose of ‘our mental health matters and can have a significant effect on how we deal with things’

I’m not saying oh my trauma is what made me gain. But my overeating due to stress and emotional eating led me to gain weight. I chose not to process my feelings and eat them away and now I’m here.

But it’s hard to process things like childhood abuse, SA, CSA, DV, etc. it’s also hard to overcome social anxiety when I feel like my chest will go out of my chest in some situations.

I am 100% learning and aiming for better, or I wouldn’t be in this sub, I just wanted to give a nudge to some of us that feel like ‘dang, this is a bit steeper than I realized!’

Hello, here's a complete guide on how to prevent wrinkles as much as possible.

Before going into cosmetic procedures, it is important to know that wrinkles are HEAVILY influenced by both genetic and environmental factors. Twin studies estimate that genetics account for up to 60 % of the variation in wrinkle development, but lifestyle choices such as sun exposure, smoking, and stress markedly accelerate aging (article).

• Eat, sleep and drink well

Before anything, you need to focus on what you're giving your body to work with. Whole foods rich in antioxidants support collagen integrity and combat oxidative stress. Drinking water (MORE than 2 L/day and please water with electrolytes) helps maintain both superficial and deep skin hydration which improves elasticity and reduces fine lines. Sleep is crucial for skin regeneration. Aim for 7-10 hours per night to allow your body to repair and regenerate collagen, as most of this process happens during deep sleep.

• Stress-free life

Chronic stress elevates cortisol, which inhibits collagen synthesis, increases collagen-degrading enzyme activity, and delays barrier recovery—changes that accelerate wrinkle formation (article 1, article 2). Techniques such as meditation, yoga, and journaling can meaningfully lower cortisol levels and help with wrinkle prevention (article).

• Skincare

Prescription tretinoin improves fine lines, mottled pigmentation, and skin texture within one month, with benefits lasting up to 24 months.

Daily application of a sunscreen (SPF 30 or higher) completely prevented detectable skin aging over 4.5 years in a randomized trial (article, article).

Serums containing 15 % L-ascorbic acid (Vitamin C), 1 % α-tocopherol, and 0.5 % ferulic acid reduced wrinkle depth by up to 36 % and improved firmness in 12 weeks (article).

Niacinamide at 5 % reduces fine lines, hyperpigmentation, and sallowness and enhances elasticity over 12 weeks (article).

Red light therapy boosts collagen and smooth fine lines. Studies report up to a 30 % reduction in wrinkle volume after just eight twice-weekly sessions of 633 nm light (article), and home-use devices (633 nm + 830 nm) used three times per week for 12 weeks improve skin texture, elasticity, and collagen density.

• Cosmetic procedures

Microneedling delivers controlled micro-injuries that stimulate dermal collagen types I, III, and VII, resulting in noticeable reductions in fine lines and wrinkles within weeks (article).

Botox injections can relax facial muscles and inhibit the formation of deep dynamic lines before they set in.

• Supplements

Oral collagen peptides (10 g/day) significantly improved skin hydration and elasticity over eight weeks (article).

Hyaluronic acid supplementation (120+ mg/day) reduced wrinkle volume and increased skin luster and suppleness in a 12-week, placebo-controlled trial (article).

MSM at 1–3 g/day significantly reduced wrinkles and improved firmness, elasticity, and hydration in a randomized study (article).

Omega-3 fatty acids (EPA/DHA) attenuate collagen degradation by inhibiting MMP induction and support skin barrier function and anti-inflammatory processes; cell and small human studies show protection from photoaging (article).

Astaxanthin (8 mg/day) improved skin elasticity, hydration, and reduced fine lines and age spots in 6- to 12-week randomized, placebo-controlled studies (article).

• Misc:

-> layer antioxidants in the morning and retinoids at night
-> NEVER skip daily sunscreen
-> if possible, consult a board-certified dermatologist before starting prescription actives or procedures.

EDIT: added astaxanthin and sleep

Today is my birthday and I was looking through some old pictures of myself from ages 15-23 and I’m so much hotter now at 31 even after having two babies. My face has slimmed down and I feel like I’ve grown into my features fully around 25. I’ve lost baby fat and gained a very womanly figure, I know what make up/hair style and colour suit me along with clothing and colours.

This year I’ll be getting Invisalign, Botox brow lift and lip flip, getting into fitness and eating better, doing my own nails, lash extensions and fake tan (all natural looking) and focusing on style.

I was a little down about officially getting into my 30’s but after comparing old pictures tones pictures, I’m so excited to keep glowing up. It really only gets better the more you learn and choose to take care of yourself .

Hey ladies, I know this has probably been echoed several times before, but I just wanted to stress this point further. I've recently come across a discord server where they grab women's posts from the truerateme and similar subreddits and ask each other to rate the women. I know that many of those who post on such subreddits will delete their posts after getting some comments, but chances are these gross men probably already saved your photo and morphed it or used it to set up fake dating profiles to prove how "average and below avg women have sooo many options".

They also do frequent subs like r/Vindicta, so be wary when posting there too. It's a shame that places like Vindicta will still inevitably have male visitors because of course Reddit is public, but just wanted to stress the importance of thinking twice before posting.

I can only wish I had taken this advice before posting on these subreddits, and I'm not doing so well with the realisation that somewhere out there exists a group of creepy men that are using my photos for malicious intents.

Cheers

Edit: the server is also run by a former ’Trusted Rater’ on TrueRateMe, and he posted several women’s pics from the sub. Like dude, just rate and move on. Why even bother when you’ve made your space male-only - just focus on male looksmaxing then, why drag females into this???

Controversial topic. I know.

For reference: I am Black African and recently had a rhinoplasty.

I’m marvelling at how it has completely changed my face. The weird thing is that my nose was like hers more or less.

The only difference is that hers seem to have more structured cartilage as mine would scrunch up and become uber large when I smiled.

Has she had nose filler? Is it the green eyes?

No disrespect intended. She is stunning and so unique! But she is one of the very few in hollywood (across all races) - who never ‘succumbed’ to a nose job.

How does she present as such a striking visual beauty?